For the closeted... How badly would you like to open that door and why not?

[Gracefullyfemme]

I've said before I'm not even sure I'm a cross-dresser as I don't go out as one and only wear lingerie in private. That said I would love to go out (out of town) as a woman IF I could pull-it-off as I do believe deep within me there's a woman that wants to be free. I am with Lacey in that coming out to family would be too hard on them. I've created a persona of being an independent "no nonsense get it done guy" but know its to hide my soft/feminine side. It's a balancing act which is frustrating for me but its all I can do. Living in a small city far from a major one is another reason for the frustration and moving at this point in my life isn't an option. Being able to connect with other CD's does help and I thank you all for your insight.

[Cheryl T]

From the moment I began dressing I had the need to do so in public. I just wanted to be seen.
Fast forward to my teen years and I'm home dressing and trying makeup and looking awful, truth be told, yet I had to walk outside the house.
Later came the underdressing of course and finally I was discovered by my wife. I told her I wanted to go out in public and she was apprehensive. First there were night time drives, then we joined a support group that would go apres meetings to the local diner and occasionally to the movies en masse.
Now it's a regular thing and no biggy.

[JamieO'H]

I've been fascinated by long flowing skirts for almost as long as I can remember, so it was pretty much inevitable that I'd eventually give in to curiosity as a teenager. That was a looooong time ago now, but I knew from the off that I belonged in long skirts, nothing more. I don't wear any other female clothing.
I would love to be able to wear them in public, but I don't have the courage, and am naturally someone who shies away from attention anyway. At 6ft 5in tall it's hard to avoid that at the best of times, so throwing skirts into the mix would be a step too far unfortunately. And I know for a fact that my family would not understand.
So I'm staying in the closet.

[nancy58]

I have been wrestling mightily with how and whether to open the door. I am not as courageous as you; I could never contemplate going out in obviously femme clothing without wearing a wig and removing every last scrap of beard from my face. I long to switch over to femme mode full-time, and the things holding me back are staying married to my wife and possibly alienating my siblings and their families.

[JackieD]

Being where the weather gets cold out. I can wee bras under my sweatshirt . Pantyhose under my male clothing. With sexy panties. And go out. Food shopping, Walmart. Checking out the woman?s section. Much easier then the summer

[Heather76]

I am out to my wife and 2 others. Because I know most people in my circle would not be accepting, I won't come out of the closet to them. I have been out dressed in places they simply wouldn't be so I've not risked being exposed. I expect that will always be the case.

[Monique65]

I am very comfortable in my closet and have no plans on opening the door any further. I have my wife’s approval to wear bras and panties, and that is good enough for me. Anything further I do in the privacy of my own home when I’m all alone.

[gwencd158]

Ditto! My only change to that is when I was on business trips, I would bury my stash even before bed, now, I just leave out.. don?t care what the maid sees anymore. I am petrified however, of being fully dressed and there is a fire alarm lol.

[kevadivine24]

Hello, everyone! So, I want to dress up more often but my boyfriend is also femme and would creep out. I want to find a way to lock away heels, lingerie and dresses.

[Jamie001]

The time has never been better to come out and be yourself. The most rewarding thing is life is being your true self. So girls, you may want to consider opening that closet door and exposing the really your to the world. Remember the olds saying: "Those that matter don't mind, and those the mind don't matter". Those are words to live by.

[Angela Marie]

I go out fully dressed quite a bit. I told my wife when on our second date. She is supportive but clearly does not want me to come out, and I really can?t blame her. I?m pretty sure that at 69 years old my children, other family and friends would be shocked. So what would be the benefit. I have a petite figure so I do pretty well going out. I have a great wife, children, grandchildren, family and friends. Sometimes it?s just not about only us. I?m satisfied with my station in life.

[Samantha51]

I'd like to be out. I doubt I'll be able to if my situation stays the same. In this winter weather I'm able to fully underdress and I like it a lot. The hug of the bra is comforting and a real "ahh" of stress relief. The rest of it is a private finger to my social conditioning. I hope to do more when I'm earning again. At this early stage in my journey I'm not making any cast iron guarantees to anyone.

[BustyOlivia]

For me, I wish I could live I life as Olivia with my loved ones, but sadly that will never be the case, even with my wife, she is supportive, yet doesn?t want to know about my private time. So it works as is, but in a dram world, I would love for her to see me as Olivia.

[Freddi]

I've often thought about coming out but I doubt any of my friends would understand. My wife knows and is accepting.....often encourages my dressings offering advice and sometimes buying items for me. We've done a night time drive which gives quite a buzz but never left the car. Not sure I ever will have the courage to go out totally dressed. I'm quite happy it being just me & my wife knowing.

[Raychel]

I am out to almost all my friends and family that matter
And honestly I would love to dress every day.

But my nerves and appearence really will not allow that.
So I just keep the full dressing at home, and only when I am home alone
If I have people over is is guy mode only

My current situation puts me in the public eye almost all the time.
Not ready for the ridicule of being dressed as Raychel.
I will probably never really step out the door.
But on those days off, Watch out

[Melinda Jean]

I have no desire to come out of the closet. What I do in my private life is for me only. My "public" persona would be destroyed in a heartbeat if I was ever outed. Though now retired, as others have said, I was in a very male dominated profession and my private fem side would NEVER be accepted.

That said, I am happy to remain hidden away from potential embarrassment, because most people can't be accepting.

[Jamie Lynn]

I have opened it slightly on occasion though I have not actually gone anywhere to mix with the public. Nerves, the fear of being discovered by someone that could derail my career, and my desire to keep my loving and tolerant wife mostly happy have kept me reserved in this respect. I still have driven partially dressed, with and without a wig, no makeup, day and night, and dressed the same at a nearby friends house to watch various sporting events. He is an accepting, non-dresser.

I SO want to go out dressed freely in public!!

[Sometimes Steffi]

As you all probably know, I'm in a couple of Meetup groups of trans girls, and I go out with them a lot. We usually have 40 to 50 trans girls and we meet in a public setting, like a public bar or restaurant. If someone has problems with us, we have many more people, with many of them having military or police experience. I'm totally unafraid, except when walking back and forth to the car in the dark, no matter how short the walk.

On the other side, I've met many GG women and girls while out who come over to meet with us, I think because we're having so much fun. Some of these GGs have even joined in for our traditional group pic(s).

Santa: I wish that every trans girl could find a social group to be a part of. Please, Santa. I've been very good this year. I've even looked very sexy or hot on occasion.

[Destinycd]

I have no desire to come out of the closet. What I do in my private life is for me only. My "public" persona would be destroyed in a heartbeat if I was ever outed. Though now retired, as others have said, I was in a very male dominated profession and my private fem side would NEVER be accepted.

That said, I am happy to remain hidden away from potential embarrassment, because most people can't be accepting.

I feel the same way. My dressing is for me anyway. It?s my escape. I really don?t need anyone encroaching.

[Jessica Secret]

In my case the biggest reason I'm not out is because 99% of my wardrobe is romantic lingerie/nighties so thus I wouldn't wear that in public lol! I have a boyfriend who is extremely accepting, supportive and encouraging so no issue with an SO being the reason.

[Leah87]

I have been in the closet for all of my CD existence and will probably stay that way, if I?m truly honest.

The ramifications and issues associated with coming out could be quite awkward.

Think it?s safer to stay in the closet at this time

[SaraLin]

I'd love to throw the door to my closet wide open and bravely step out into the world, but my closet has three guards at the door. They are my fear, my body, and my wife.

Guard #1 (fear) wants to stop me but I can get past him.
The problem is that he insists on following me everywhere and whispering in my ear.

Guard #2 (body) reminds me that I'm "not built for this."
I can try to disguise myself to try and slip past him, but we both know that I'll never be "real."
The reactions I get from the outside world prove this to be true.

Guard #3 (wife) is the real keeper of the keys.
My love for her, coupled with her inability to accept my Sara-ness, is what's keeping me so solidly confined.
I can't complain too much. It's warm, safe, and comfy in here.
If only I could stretch my legs once in a while...

[Kelli_cd]

Well said, SaraLin. I never thought about "guards" at my closet door, but that really rings true for me.
My closet is a happy place and for the most part I'm content. That's not to say I'm satisfied, though.
I would really like to have a full makeover, and then visit a club like S4 in Dallas all dolled up. And have pictures made of the evening.
Alas, the first 2 guards are glaring at me for these thoughts right now. And I don't know about approaching my wife with this idea. I could, of course, just do it. But, I think I'd like it better if she knew, just in case something were to happen.

[Freddi]

I would love to do the same Kelli but I would only want to do it with my wifes blessing and have her by side at the time too. I have brought the subject up and she's not against the idea...just a little unsure of it. Who know's what 2024 will bring

[AndreaOTK]

i think the same, also especially the fact my wife would accept it but would ask me to let her enjoy with other men and I am not prepared for that.