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Thread: For the closeted... How badly would you like to open that door and why not?

  1. #51
    Always been a GIRL. Michelle1955's Avatar
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    Bea,
    Looks like we are the same age. My back story when young in the 1950’s until like 1963 the neighbor kids were all girls (3) my age so we played daily mostly at their homes. I put on my 1st pair of panties when one of my friends and I were playing in her bedroom about 4-5 years of age. So we ended up switching each other underwear she wore mine and I wore her panties.

    As far back as I can remember I felt I should had been a girl. Puberty was terrible for me, I have issues that my body did fit what my brain was saying. Ie I should have been a girl. Did get married to a wonderful woman. We been married 43 years had 2 kids.

    She does accept, but does not understand fully. Does not want the issue to get out to the general public.


    Yes, still have the issues concerning why I have a male body. But that the cards I was given /dealt.

    I undress daily, she will wash, fold my things etc. See me wearing panties, leggings, some clothing not an issue. But does not like my bras or forms. So I basically respect that, she is my soul mate and her sole mate. But bra acceptance might change as I am a large 42 A-Cup /small 42 b-cub naturally now. So if i get much larger the bra will become a need to wear.

    I am retired now, always would loved to been able to go full time. Truthfully always had the desire to have the surgeries, but would not have surgeries if I would lose my wife. So guess I have to been a lesbian, no desire to be with men.

  2. #52
    A Brave Freestyler JohnH's Avatar
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    I have thrown open the door for "crossdressing", which in my case I like to call it "freestyling". I'm really into dresses; the last time I wore trousers this past month was to get up on a roof to replace shingles. I almost always have painted nails. I wear dresses to go shopping, to doctor appointments, and to church. For church I add heels, hosiery, and makeup. I have beyond shoulder length hair and a bust. I also sing second bass in my church choir.
    I have the appearance of a woman but a voice of a man.

    John
    John (Legal name)

    Preferred pronouns: he, his, him

  3. #53
    Junior Member
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    I like wearing women's clothing, but do not feel womanly at all. From the neck up, I am a bearded man and am not at all interested in wigs, makeup or jewelry. I am not interested in passing or adopting feminine mannerisms. This MIAD is staying home.
    My girlfriend knows that I am a crossdresser and is okay with me in panties and bra once in a while. The only closet door that I would like opened is for me to wear a skirt, stockings and forms in her presence. Unfortunately, she may never be open to this.

  4. #54
    I accept myself as is Gillian Gigs's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CeCe View Post
    Unfortunately, she may never be open to this.
    The key to many relationships has much to do with compromise. Often people think about the possibility of a win-win situation. Even in the court room there is something called "Quid pro quo", as in something, for something. Now you have to find something that she desires from within the relationship and work at getting a win-win situation. I slowly gained ground in my CD'ing, but it took time and patience.
    I like myself, regardless of the packaging that I may come in! It's what is on the inside of the package that counts!

  5. #55
    New Member
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    Jan 2024
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    Wide open!

    I'm tired of hiding. It's mentally exhausting and reinforces a feeling that I am being naughty or perverse.

    I would like the freedom to wear what I want, when I want. To let others know that while I am a man in women's clothing, that I'd prefer to be a woman.

    I know that one day it will happen. My in-laws will pass away, my kids will figure things out as will my wife's siblings.

    The thing is, she has several family members that are trans, gay or bi. I don't think that my revelation would be a great shock. Moreover, as long as her family accepts it, she would not feel quite so odd about it

  6. #56
    Exploring NEPA now Cheryl T's Avatar
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    I'm not closeted anymore.
    How badly did I want to get out? Well, it came to the point where I was willing to risk my marriage to be open and honest with her about it. I was prepared to suffer whatever the consequences to be able to be myself completely. My result was positive, unlike many here. I'm thankful every day.
    I don't wear women's clothes, I wear MY clothes !

  7. #57
    Member ReallyLauren's Avatar
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    I struggled with the urge to be out in the world as my authentic female self for many years. For so long, it seemed like a dream or a fantasy. There were a few fits and starts over the years separated by some long gaps. Once I came to terms with my reality and got past the guilt, shame and concern about other peoples opinions, I was able to open the door and start experiencing the world as Lauren. Now, I'm out in the world and doing everyday things as my authentic self and enjoying my new reality.

  8. #58
    Silver Member Pumped's Avatar
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    Aug 2013
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    I would love to kick the darned door open so hard it would fly off the hinges and end up out in the yard, but I am chicken, don't pass, and most of my friends and family would freak out so I stay at home, some what closeted, out to only my wife.

  9. #59
    Junior Member Adelina's Avatar
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    May 2011
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    Would completely love to open it, but not sure about the loss of relationships, etc.

  10. #60
    Member Celee's Avatar
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    Midwest
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    In my fantasy world I would be Chuck Norris and smash that door to smithereens but in reality Im too much of a coward. I don?t want to throw 3 decades of marriage overboard by pushing boundaries further than my wife is comfortable with. If she lets me know that she is ok with me going further then I will but until then I will keep doing what I do now.

  11. #61
    Member AllieBellema's Avatar
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    For me it's the outfits. All the ball gowns I own, I could only blend in with a Civil War reenactment. I've worn my dresses to Pride before, I'm sure I stick out like a sore thumb... I mean, who would wear so much satin and lace on a hot July day? I do have a couple outfits that can at least let me blend in with current times, but I'd rather not push the envelope on that either so I keep it mostly closeted.

  12. #62
    Gold Member Sometimes Steffi's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gillian Gigs View Post
    The key to many relationships has much to do with compromise. Often people think about the possibility of a win-win situation. Even in the court room there is something called "Quid pro quo", as in something, for something. Now you have to find something that she desires from within the relationship and work at getting a win-win situation. I slowly gained ground in my CD'ing, but it took time and patience.
    There's an activity that my wife is very involved, that didn't really interest me. But, after some thought, I deci8ded to participate with her. It wasn't Quid Pro Quo (I give her something for something in return), but a gift of my time together with her in this activity.

    [SIZE=1]- - - Updated - - -[/SIZE]

    Quote Originally Posted by AllieBellema View Post
    For me it's the outfits. All the ball gowns I own, I could only blend in with a Civil War reenactment. I've worn my dresses to Pride before, I'm sure I stick out like a sore thumb.
    I've been to several civil war battle reenactments and have seen the women folk reenactors. I would love to be able to participate in a period costume, but I'm afraid the other women wouldn't accept me.
    Hi, I'm Steffi and I'm a crossdresser... And I accept and celebrate both sides of me. Or, maybe I'm gender fluid.

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