When did you tell your S/O that you were a CD?

[Talon DeRojo]

I'm curious as to when each of us shared with our wife or girlfriend that we crossdressed. I married late (42), in part because of fears of having to hide or of being rejected due to CDing. By the time I met my wife-to-be, I had decided to share that info early on so that time was not needlessly wasted. Something about her must have made me feel that I would not be rejected since I told her on our first date. While she didn't jump for joy, she accepted me CDing and all. I treasure her and being open certainly paid off for me. I read with sadness about those of us who have been unable to be open with those we love and struggle with what to do.
Talon

[Cherry Lynn]

We had been married 23 years when I told mine. We have a pretty liberal lifestyle and she is pretty accepting of it but is a little uncomfortable about me going out in public dressed. We have attended several parties at some friends house with me dressed and took a 3 hour drive to a friends house with me en femme. She was a bundle of nerves on that trip.

[Billijo49504]

My first wife knew I liked silky panties before she died. Then my second wife, hired as a baby sitter, wondered who's panties those were in the wash? I told her they were mine and that I liked womens clothes. She didn't have a problem with that, so... BJ

[Cherry Lynn]

My first wife knew I liked silky panties before she died. Then my second wife, hired as a baby sitter, wondered who's panties those were in the wash? I told her they were mine and that I liked womens clothes. She didn't have a problem with that, so... BJ

There is a story that touches the heart. Way to go BJ.

[TeriAnn]

I told my wife of six years that I crossdressed after the shock wore off she told me was fine. She helps me buy clothes and now helps me pick out heels I might like. I told her after reading my horoscope It told me now was I a good time to tell a loved one a big secret, so I did. Every thing is doing fine between us. I love my wife and always will.0.02

[Francine]

I told my wife, after she found a box with 'fem things' in it, and was wondering about it. That was 26 years ago...and we've been married for 31 years.

Francine

[Stacy_CD]

I've been going out with my girlfriend for close to a year now.

I've been dreading telling her since about 3 months. It's lead to some tossing and turning at night. Sometimes I just feel like blurting it out.

But, I'll definitely tell her before / if we ever get married. Probably even before.

[Caitlintgsd]

My spouse has known about my dressing since prior to our wedding (17 years) but I never told her about the transgendered part of it until about 2 years ago.

[Caz]

[SIZE="4"][SIZE="3"][SIZE="2"]
I told my wife, Jackie, that I liked to crossdress, four hours after we met.

Four hours and five minutes after we met, I was wearing her Burgundy coloured
satin panties and matching bra

We were married 5 months later !

Luv from

Caz xx[/SIZE][/SIZE][/SIZE]

[Joy Carter]

Talon you did the right thing we are so proud of you. Wish things could be changed in hine sight but it was the seventies and this CD thing was not heard of in my town. I thought I could forget about it I had not CD ed for over seven years but stress and other factors made it come back and the rest is history.

[angie_pacd]

I dressed in my sisters things while I lived at home, I married my beautiful wife right after high school graduation and thought that MARRIAGE WOULD HELP ME NOT TO DRESS "WRONG"!!! Well after we were married for about 5 years I got up enough nerve to tell her that I wore panties, wow she was ok with it, over the next year or so I made it like an experiment to try different things. She didnt know that I already enjoyed being fully dressed.
Its now 35 years later and I still dress, almost every day at home, I have a nice wardrobe and she is still ok with it. I really love her. Angie

[TGMarla]

I told mine last November. I have been married for nearly 13 years. I was caught dressed up by her late son, who told her and everyone else he knew, found with pantyhose by her on two occasions, and busted having been in her things on a few occasions. It's a textbook example of how not to go about things. I regret not telling her from the get go. She might have left me right then, but I'm not happy about the hurt and pain I caused her. I caused a lot of damage to our relationship by hiding this from her. To this day, it is something she wants nothing to do with, and I am still, for all practical purposes, deeply closeted. I make do with what time I have to myself, and am unable to effectively go out anywhere, or share this with anyone except on this forum.

[Harriet]

I did not actually tell her until many years after we were married. She was upset but reluctantly accepted it. However, after we were married about four months, I put on one of her nighties. She wasn't very happy, so I "went back into the closet."

[DonnaT]

A few months after we were married 30+ yrs ago. She didn't like the way my hairy legs felt at night, and shaved them. That led to donning panties and hose, and then finally telling her. Of course, now that she knows, she won't let me shave the legs.

[Maureen Henley]

A month after we met in 1983, I told my wife that I "had been" (Yeah, right!) a crossdresser, but had stopped (LOL). I started again about 5 years later, dressing in secret when she was away, or when I was home "sick" from work. After 9 years of this, I suffered a mini-breakdown from stress and overwork. At that point, I figured I was at rock-bottom and had nothing to lose by telling her. Her reaction was primarly anger that I had put myself through the stress of hiding all those years. She has been accepting since that day 8 years ago.

[Talon DeRojo]

Danielle, Billijo, TeriAnn, and Francine: Thanks for sharing your stories. I will respond to you individually later.
Talon

[Yes I am]

I told mine at a karaoke bar on our third or fourth date, she had asked me why I shaved my body and I told her it was because I like to crossdress, she's cool with it, especially after I answered a few of her questions about it. She likes body hair on boys though, so I let it grow back out on my chest but I still shave my legs and armpits. So far we've had a lot of fun with it, a lot of fun.

[randi_789]

Thirty five years of marriage and she doesn't know. I will not tell her now because I know her ideas about sex don't include anything out of the ordinary, and through peripheral conversations with her have an inkling of how she would fee. So, no reason to put this burden on her and ruin all these years together and all those to come. I know many will say I am living a lie, but why should I transfer the feelings I have to her, making me feel better about myself and bringing her down. I can deal with it and will.

[Josi]

I was married twice (omg - that sounds awful) before I met My SO and didn’t tell either of my previous
I “hid” it..
Denied it to myself
Went for “treatment”
Went for “healing”
Purged regular and often.
Grew a beard

LOTS of frustration

I vowed to be “open” from the beginning of any possible new relationship and risk not having one, so on 2 dating sites I showed my “Josi” picture and explained I am a hetro cross dresser looking for friendship, hoping for more!
That meant that anyone who “connected” with me knew from the start who I am.

I was so blessed that Annie was brave to say Hi … chat to me .. ask me questions ..and then meet me. I am still in awe at her strength and kindness.

I fell for her .. a beautiful spirit, a kind heart and oozing femininity.

I never had to say “oh by the way there is something you should know … “

We are still on a voyage of discovery … and for me it’s a wonderful journey.

[Andrea]

I told my ex SO when we were talk one evening in a local park.

She was saying what a rotten life she had with certain aspects of it and how I had things so much better. I then told her that she wasnt the only one with emotional baggage. This led to the obvious 'what emotional baggage' and me bursting into rears and telling her straight out.

She thought I was joking at first but did accept it. She was never entirely happy with it though and would often try to make a joke of it, such as holding a dress up in a shop and saying it suited me. She was responsible for my femme name though.

Think in the end it was partly responsible for us breaking up. Have had girlfriends and a fiance since who I made sure I never told.

Andrea

[ginafaye]

5 years into our relationship .......i teased you always get to wear the sexy stuff.........that was my awaking.......5 more years of dating .......married 5 now its all been great

[michellecd9999]

My wife and I have been married over 26 years. When we were first married, I used to wear her panties as part of foreplay. Told her I liked the feel. She seemed ok with it at first. Then one day I put on her panty hose and hoped in bed. She did NOT like that and let me know it and told me to take them off. Several months later, I put on one of her nightgowns and got into bed (to make love). Again she told me that she did not like it and to take it off. I now know that to introduce it to her that way was the WRONG way. However, I knew and still know she would not like crossdressing, even tough she would not leave me, it would be something that she would not like me doing and would not be supportive of it. I have decided to dress when I can when she is not here (or I can get out for a makeover). IF I am ever in a situation where I have to tell her, I will, but not for now.
Michelle

[Krystenw]

I told my Wife about my "problem" while we were dating. She didn't care for it much at first but then she started helping me with my nails and started picking out clothes for me. That was more then 32 years ago. I have been to several therapist, every one of them have helped me to understand that I am the way I am and will likely never change. My wife still tells me that I am her best friend no matter what I am wearing.
Krysten

[phobsessed]

After 3 yrs. of living together and 8 yrs. of marriage(we are going to be married for 10 yrs. in august) I decided it was time to come clean.
I took her to a motel with a waterbed,jacuzzi,private patio and fireplace(her favorites)about 25 min. from our home for our 8th anniversary telling her I had something I think is good and no it's nothing bad.
She kept asking what I was going to tell her and when we got checked in on fri. around 4:30pm I took a shower and told her to put her phose(she indulges me almost every time we have sex)on and a sexy dressing gown and very high heels and wait for me on the patio.(we were there until sun. morning)I came out with nothing on but my bday suit and sat facing her and just spilled it all to her.Questions galore e.g.When did you start(11 yrs.old)why didn' you tell me sooner(because I thought you would think I was gay(am not)or perverted)etc. etc.Although I did not wear anything but a hardon and a smile all weekend it turned out better than I ever thought.It was about 4 mos. later in the middle of a furious sex session that she said go put some phose on and let's explore this a little bit.I am only allowed to wear phose on occasion with her(she thinks the heels and dresses or skirts will be too much for her to handle).I told her I will always ask and that if she doesn't feel comfortable that night she can say not tonite,but, for the most part she says yes and realizes that I do act alot more appreciative when wearing.

[Miss Vicki]

I first told my wife that I crossdressed right after we were married. This was 30 years ago. At that time she said she understood, but she did not catch me untill a year later in pantyhose and then she blew her top. She then found a stash of mine 3 years later and considered me to be weird. I told her I would stop. But we all know about that.
About a month ago, she was at work and I brought my clothing up from the basement. Had a wonderful day dressed. Took the bag back to it's hiding place and thought I had everything inside. I did not turn around and look back. She discovered my Pals breast enhancers on the bed. She put them neatly at the foot of the bed. When I saw and I knew that she saw them, my heart almost stopped. She has not said a word about it. I think she will one day and I hope that we can go from there.