Retail workers

[heathr1]

If you are a GG who has worked or does work in a store, I hope you don't mind answering these questions.

When a male came into the store, perhaps on numerous occasions, clearly buying women's clothes for himself, was there any banter/joking among the store workers about him?

Were/are you trained to be sympathetic and discreet to CDers?

Did/does serving a CDer make some women assistants uncomfortable?

Reason being, some female assistants have been really helpful to me and others have gone out of their way to humiliate me, or not serve me.

[LaceLuvr's GG]

I actually started a thread about this topic - it ended up being a thread about how bad Wal-Mart is

I used to work in the WM stores, now I work at the home office. Diversity training/ acceptance is a policy at Wal-Mart. Our diversity policy specifically includes CDers. I can't say if there isn't whispers going on behind the scenes after a man has come in and bought women's clothes, but I can say that from most responses from CDers on this site - they've never had a problem shopping there.

WM offers training to the people that run the dressing rooms, so that they are comfortable or prepared for all situations - ie a man wanting to try on women's clothes. It is allowed and accepted at WMT.

There's my 0.02

[Momarie]

I actually asked two sales assistants at the Dress Barn in a large city here in the Midwest how they felt. One was an older woman and the other was quite young.
They both said personally they were very uncomfortable but always tried to be professional, helpful and make their shopping trip as pleasant as possible.
I didn't get the feeling they were amused or giggling about it, it just made them personally uncomfortable.

They did say they appreciated the men coming in early in the morning or close to closing because it was very difficult to accommodate them on a busy Saturday without offending some of their other customers when it came to dressing rooms.
They said in a tight situation based on a complaint they would defer to the woman customer in regard to the dressing rooms and ask the man to wait or come back later. One instance they told me about was a woman and her teenage daughter, the mom didn't want a guy back there with her daughter and kinda made a scene.

I am curious as how you Ladies feel about this.
To me it seems fair and over all the men were accommodated in a respectful way.
As for me personally, it would depend.
I WOULD LOVE to run into so many of you in a dressing room and would probably ask your advice or compliment you on your choices and appearance.
But there are a very small minority that I would be uncomfortable with and might complain to the attendant if I sensed something amiss.

It's all about the attitude....as so many of you know there is an atmosphere in a woman's dressing room that is unique. It's so sweet and such a treat, you find this perfect dress, go out to the mirrors, bump into a perfect stranger, get a little "Oh that looks wonderful on you" and you know you will feel great every time you wear it.
I think if you want to be in a woman's dressing room, you should attempt to look and behave like a woman and if you are on your lunch hour in drab, maybe wait until the rooms are empty before going in.
We should offer you every courtesy and expect your courtesy in return.

[Di]

I just asked my daughter, she is a manager at a large retail store, they have training every yr. diversity training/ acceptance , and if an employee doe`s not follow this policy they can be fired.

[kathy gg]

Back in the ealy 90's I worked in ladies retail {Learners} and although we did not have a policy in our store we certainly did have male clients. Now I cannot recall any guy ever making an announement that the clothing was for him, but most guys who did shop seemed to have questions and we always answered them as best as possible. I also don't remember anyone snickering or being rude either. Actually back then Learners had a return policy which was as long as you had a reciept you could return clothing no matter how old, no matter the condition. Well, we used to get stuff back that was obviously worn and I can remember still a little older lady bringing back a dress that smelled of cabbage. I remember it smelled so foul we had to litearlly put it in a garbage bag in the back because normally we would jsut keep all returned items in a bin under the counter. And to be honest, we did laugh about it a bit, more because none of us could imagine returning an item that smelled so damn foul, we all would have been too embarrassed.

Anyway.....moving on, Heather I would say if you are really concerned about a store not being cool I would call ahead, I run a tg shopping servie and have made loads of calls to the stores in Toronto {one's which cd seem to really like} and most stores are very accomodating. But like what was written before, stores will be even more accomodating if one is in male mode and decides to shop at off-peak hours. If anything the dressing room situation is the issue. I have found the few stores that have issues with guys coming in have had some perverts come in and "abuse" the clothing and then leave a mess for the shop girls to clean up {sooo not cool!} so they may have negative attitudes about the community.

I also think most sales associates will/can put aside their personal believes long enough to make a sale, even stores who dont' work on commission, have a quota and if you dont' meet it, you get replaced.

[phil864]

A woman complained about me in the dressing room at FASHION BUG to the manager.She was told that they did NOT discriminate and I had every right to try on the clothing. I'd been a customer there for a while. The mgr told me about it a few weeks later.

[christine55]

Back in 1978 I had begun to really dress after years of serious repression and trying to stop wanting to so bad. I was drinking very heavily at the time. I was living in Florida, was quite drunk and thought I looked kind of passable. Not even close. I went to a local mall, into a dress store, I don't even remember the name of the store, and tried on a dress in the dressing room. It was one of those dressing rooms with the partitions only shoulder high, I imagine to prevent shoplifting, but one of the other patrons obviously read me and called the cops. I was escorted out of the mall by a couple of them and there were 3 or 4 outside. Despite being quite drunk, my b.a.c. must have been at least .20 the cops were sniggering among themselves, checked my drivers licence and let me drive away. Looking back I can't imagine why I was not arrested as soon as I started the car and moved it. I guess that the fright of getting escorted out of the mall by the cops made me seem a little more sober than I was and I suppose the cops were more interested in the way I was dressed than in the possibility that I may have been impaired.
Hugs, Christine

[luky charm]

i've always hesitated to buy clothes in my own town, it's only 5000 people and i grew up here, so i didn't want that kind of attention. so i'd wait for trips to the city to make purchases, but after a while, when i was more comfortable, and cared less about public attention, i started shopping locally, and you know what, i had nothing to worry about! if you're in a small town, i say "let'er buck, and go shopping!". i was never hasseled or harrased, although i do prefer to go in on off hours, so i can take a good look, sometimes i say it's for a girlfriend, but i know the clerk sees right through me, and once she even made an attempt to put me at ease. i said that "she" wears my jeans, so what size is that?" and she just put the skirt right up against me and said, "i think that would fit." i didn't buy that skirt, but i did take more time to shop around, and bought a different one! i would go back anytime, to any store.

charmed

[HaleyPink2000]

I shop at Walmart, K Mart, Lane Bryant and a few other stores. Have tried on things in the stores etc. Never any problems. At Walmart I have bought as many as 7 complete outfits after trying on lots of clothing in the fitting rooms. The Girls keep track of How much you take in just as they do for everyone else. They are quite cool over the matter actually. Also at the checkout the Girls always talk to me, and say "How nice those selections are". They call me Ma'am, but I get Ma'am on the phone all the time, and I tend to pass easily. I try just to be myself even with my voice. Also, I'm never on edge, and I'm not like looking all around like a theif or something. People read body language quite well. So I act like a matter of fact, and just pick out what I want like everyone else.

The retail shops are quite nice to CDing buyers. Never a problem, not even in a cafe, restauraunt or even in Hotels.

[CharlaineCadence]

I go shopping every where now and I am always dressed. I have had only one place give me a hard time and that was kholes. I was accused of trying to steel and was asked to leave the store by their loss prevention people. After I forced them to call a manager and the police. I was allowed to shop with out a problem and have hod none ever since. Oh and that person no longer works for them. I always ask witch dressing rooms to use and Apoligise if I make any one feel strange but I need to be who I am and live my life for me to be happy. And haven't had to many other problems. I have even seen store employees come to my defence when other customers make rude comments (MARSHELS). I think that the times we are in now people are trained to accept us for who we are. Also with the growth in knowledge of transgender peoples. Most companies have no problems with us. and thouse who do are shrinking.

[Barb Valentine]

Here is part of an email I received from a bra store after going in for a bra fitting
"Hi Barb, I am very sorry that someone told you get out of the store. When I interview my employees, one of the questions I ask them is how their comfort level with men buying for themselves would be. We don't want anyone facing shock value as some gals are quite naive. There is no reason for anyone to make you feel uncomfortable. "

[KathyT]

I have never used a dressing room to try on things nor do I really shop alot in stores for my things.. I am too embrassed.. Just something I have to deal with. I shop mostly online for my things.. anyway..
I think we all have to remember that we should use respect if we want respect. I mean.. I would not like some man going into a dressing room that my teenage girl or wife was going in. How can you tell the difference between a man trying on a dress for himself with no other intentions and a pervert or pedophile? I know perverts and pedophiles are not limited to males but..
If you really must try on something.. you should be in female attire and act as a female would with respect to others... The impression you leave with others, is the impression others will have of all of us!
I am so tired of the CrossDresser being the brunt of comedy shows and jokes.. I cringe when I see and hear this..
oh well. enough of my big mouth...

[KarlaRissa]

Here is part of an email I received from a bra store after going in for a bra fitting
"Hi Barb, I am very sorry that someone told you get out of the store. When I interview my employees, one of the questions I ask them is how their comfort level with men buying for themselves would be. We don't want anyone facing shock value as some gals are quite naive. There is no reason for anyone to make you feel uncomfortable. "

Over here in Australia, we have a chain of stores called Bras 'n' Things. They have some great stuff in there, its awesome. I emailed them asking their policy on Males trying stuff on. In a nutshell, they said that they have a policy of no males in the change area (Which I can understand so they dont make the female clientelle nervous), but I could call and arrange a fitting after hours. I dont think I would take them up on the offer, due to the fact I am still very shy, but I thought it was a nice gesture.

When I went to go buy my first skirt at Target (A chain like K-Mart), I wanted to try it on. I went to the males change rooms and there was a female employee staffing it. I asked for 1 token. She looked down at the skirt which i was holding, looked up at me, smilied and gave me a token. When I was on my way out she smiled back at me but said nothing.

Hugs and Kisses,
Karla