What convinced you to try?

[Alicia_lynn419]

First of all, a warm thank you to all you wonderful ladies who have taken the time to answer my previous questions!

I was thinking over the weekend what are the qualities that your CD SO had/has that allowed you to look beyond his crossdressing? Especially if you didn't know prior to becoming close(er), what was it that you found attractive enough in your partner to take on the crossdressing?

Just coming out of a divorce with a wife who knew, but was not all that supportive, I wonder as all guys in my position do, if/how we would ever be able to find a meaningful, serious relationship - long term and beyond, with a wonderful lady who is willing to accept people like us. There seem to be so few out there who are understanding, or even willing to try to understand us.

I'm in no hurry to get involved again - I am enjoying this time becoming reacquainted with myself, but the thought of having to go back in the closet after finally leaving it - just doesn't seem realistic to me anymore. It would not be fair to a future partner, nor myself.

So.. just trying to get some ideas here... food for thought...

Hoping and wishing and praying.....

Allie

[Sandi W GG]

Well Allie I am not sure I will be of much help. I will try though.
My ex's personality won me over. He always had a smile on his face, and happy (so it seemed).. As I got closer with him I realized behind all this macho maddness of his was this very sensitive person, that I grew to love. He was closed up so much at first and in time we found each other growing and letting one another in to areas of both of our lives that had never happened before. I outed hhim 2 months into our relationship, his shaved leggs gave him away... was I scared oh yeah! But I already in 2 months had become attached and I have been the type not to do that early on. I never believed in love at first site either, but it bit me on the butt...
Be yourself is all I can say. Whithin weeks he was leaving me hints, and I caught on to them easily. Having a gay brother, I had been around cder's and ts's so I kinda already knew, just never in a million years would I have thought I would get involved with such a person.
Hope that helps
Sandi GG

[LaceLuvr's GG]

I have to say Lace let me in on his CDing quite early in the relationship - but I had got to know him well enough to know I wasn't going to let him get away.

Lace and I spent several nights speaking one another on the internet and "hanging out" at my house. We talked about everything - past relationships, likes, dislikes; almost nothing sexual. Lace seemed to want to connect to me on a totally different level than I had ever experienced before. When Lace finally came out and told me about his partial CDing - it was a definate "a-ha" moment. I realized it had to be the CDing that made him such a wonderful, thoughtful, and caring person. I can't honestly tell you if that's what makes him so wonderful - but I definately have never had a relationship of this caliber with a non-CDer... I can assure you that!!!

[Penny Dreadful GG]

Well, let's see. Nothing convinced me to try out a relationship with a cd; it was something I actively sought, having experienced it previously (I loved it!).

I therefore knew before entering my current relationship that my partner is a cd, so no surprises there. There are so many benefits: he loves to shop for clothes, never minds holding my purse, never complains about less than smoothly shaven legs as that works BOTH ways, likes to check out new makeup, etc. With him, I can do all the things I never liked dragging my non-cd partners through. I can take time to really investigate things, AND get his honest input too.

I feel like I have never been so completely understood, and I think the cding is what brings that out - that sensitivity.

I adore my partner. So be patient and keep your eyes open for a like-minded GG. I had to widen my 'distance borders,' and it was so worth it.

best of luck,

Penny

[Kerry Owens]

What convinced me??(thinks hard) His patience, honesty, sense of humor, ...did I mention his patience?
Who he is is more important to me than the what (CD) that he is!

[Anita Mae GG]

i wasn't convinced of anything except my love for him, and i did what i could to understand the situation.

[kathy gg]

Alicia

Unlike some who did not go into this knowing from the get go, I looked for a cd partner. I knew if a guy was in the right headspace, was over the guilt and shame, was comfortable with his sexuality and his gender {just being a cd} that this could be a fun cool thing.

Since I found him through his femme website I got to read about the kind of person he was projecting to the masses. He was clear, confident, and well, he looked cute as a girl {one indicator that he would be cute as a boy!}. Once I got to know him better I could tell how well grounded he was. He had gone throught the "rough" patches of self acceptance and was sort of feeling that he had alot to offer as a partner and that this was not some negative aspect of who he was. He also seemed comfortable and liked his male self too. Alot of men seem so down on their male side, but one has to nature the male within and not just focus on the woman with in. I also liked that he choose to remain alone rather than get into a marriage and lie about this stuff. And it was not like he did not have a chance to marry, he did. But he knew that she would not accept and so he backed off and spent many years alone.

If he had been full of himself {more into his mirror than me}, wishy washy about his gender or sexuality, if he spent more time online and if he just never considered my feelings in his actions....well I would not be writing this now. I treat people I love with respect and kindness and honesty and always expect the same back... otherwise, well I dont' want people who can't treat me that way in my life.

But what has been so important is that he has alway valued my imput, my feelings, he has complete respect and put our little family first. And it doesn't hurt that he tells me I am beautiful almost every day. Even in the morning {yikes, what is he crazy!??}

Anyway, good luck pondering..

First of all, a warm thank you to all you wonderful ladies who have taken the time to answer my previous questions!

I was thinking over the weekend what are the qualities that your CD SO had/has that allowed you to look beyond his crossdressing? Especially if you didn't know prior to becoming close(er), what was it that you found attractive enough in your partner to take on the crossdressing?

Just coming out of a divorce with a wife who knew, but was not all that supportive, I wonder as all guys in my position do, if/how we would ever be able to find a meaningful, serious relationship - long term and beyond, with a wonderful lady who is willing to accept people like us. There seem to be so few out there who are understanding, or even willing to try to understand us.

I'm in no hurry to get involved again - I am enjoying this time becoming reacquainted with myself, but the thought of having to go back in the closet after finally leaving it - just doesn't seem realistic to me anymore. It would not be fair to a future partner, nor myself.

So.. just trying to get some ideas here... food for thought...

Hoping and wishing and praying.....

Allie

[Jean GG]

What attracted me to my husband, and still does, is his humanness and the fact that he is a true gentleman! Despite our challanges I always tenderly tell him that HE IS A GOOD MAN...and a bit of a sleazy woman! jean