How Do I come Out To My SO?

[LeslieGirl]

HI
Everyone

I"m presently with a straight hetro-guy whom I"ve been with
for 10 years, and he doesn"t know that I"m a Transsexual
Girl Post-Op. And another issue I have is My preference is
not really guys. Me being with guys acting as a hetro-Girl
has been a false front all this time. I really never did enjoy
intimacy with guys. I enjoy with other Girls instead. It"s
been a long time of hiding. I want to come out to him. But
scared me can"t seem to get the words to come out. I"ve
always wanted other Girls but hiding behind a false front
playing hetro-Girl. My gender Identity is female, preference females. Any Guidance, Advice?

Thanx
Hugs
TGirl

[LeslieGirl]

HI
Julie

Thanx for the reply. Your advice sounds really good. It"s
just that I don"t look forward to intimacy like he does, and
it"s something I look forward to getting over with. If he was a female, I could go all night. thanx for the E-Mail offer.

Hugs
TGirl

[DonnaT]

I see no need for you to come out to him either. If you planned on a commitment, then yes, maybe, but then again that would depend on the type person he is. Would he get physical, rant to all your friends who don't know, etc.

Just tell him you tried, but you're into gals not guys. No other explanation is necessary.

[racquel]

be honest;say what you need to say to get on with your life.happiness awaits,go on be happy.

[LeslieGirl]

HI
Girls

I"ll take Donna"s advice. I don"t know if he would come unglued or not knowing I"m a Transsexual Girl. I"ll leave that part. But the other part, I"m into gals not guys, what
would be best in that area.

Hugs
TGirl
I Love Being A Girl

[LeslieGirl]

HI
Julie

The relationship I"m in now is not going to be a lifetime commitment. I won"t disclose my T status. I can tell him about my preference in girls instead of guys without being physically hurt. I could maybe drop some hints. I have been in the past playing a hetro-girl, with guys. I"m never please
with it. As for two women with him. I prefer not. I"m one on one with a girl. A hour ago we were sitting watching TV, and he was watching me instead of the TV.

Hugs
TGirl
I Love Being A Girl

[Lily_gg]

TGirl honey, if you're a lesbian, and not a straight girl, then why stay with a guy? And if your biggest concern is his feelings, then lying to yourself to stay with him will only hurt him more long term.

A few years ago, I was going out with a guy who I couldn't see myself staying with long term, and I eventually faced up to the fact that I didn't want to be with him anymore, told him (but not quite that harshly, we talked it over, and agreed it was over), and broke it off. He took it quite hard for a while, but is now living with his present girlfriend, and seems perfectly happy. And I'm very happy with my bf.

Point is, regardless of sexuality, 'mind-gender', 'DNA-gender', 'physical-gender' (you get what I mean I hope), there's no reason for you to stay in a relationship which isn't making you happy, particularly if you dread the 'intimacy'. A friend of mine once gave me a very important piece of advice, which he knew I'd never heard (or at least acted like I knew) - the most important person in your life is you, look after her.

So go do that, and good luck with whatever choice you make. *hugs*

[AussieRhonda]

There is only one thing to remember "If you can`t be true to yourself, Who can you be true to? As you seem to be doing all right so far,regarding transition, you may have to do as you had done in the past and re-assess just where you are going. Ask " Do I want to be some-one else`s image or do I want to be ME ??? It seems a sheer waste to go so far and not do and be who you really are doesn`t it ?