Do any other girls have a set tolerance limit as outlined by the S/O ?
My S/O has no problems with buying me nighties, skirts, dresses, shoes and my underwear. When we go away for a weekend she helps me select my outfit and helps me pack.
However, Wigs and makeup are not condoned. She will even help me to dress and we will sit and talk for hours.
But, wigs and makeup are taboo subjects.
Any advice on how you broached this subject will be well received.
Thanks in advance.
Hi Vicki,
I have not experienced any taboos yet from my wife. She enjoys shopping with me and helping me select my outfits but usually ends up buying for herself too, which is fine with me. Make up is fine and she has bought me lipstick and brought it home to me and usually helps me select wigs and put my make up on correctly. She did however tell me to stop buying shoes!She said that I have too many!!
The only thing that my wife requires is that I don't dress up enfemme too often because she wants her "man" around sometimes and also she has refused to dance with me while I am dressed enfemme, which I certainly do understand and agree to myself. That would be too over the top for me too!
Sorry hon, I hope it helps some at least.
Yeah....she tolerates me as her husband and even though she knows that I still crossdress she wants nothing to do with it....sooooo as long as I keep it out of her face...were both happy girls!!
So limits to where I dress but no limits to how I dress and I kind of like it that way...if she was involved I'm afraid that I'd be wearing bagy tee shirts, jeans and no makeup...hmmmm that's how I dress in male mode. Hehehe
Ohhhh and we won't tell your wife you broke her rules in your Avatar!! Lol
Love Karren
Last edited by Karren H; 08-29-2006 at 07:10 AM.
wowok she knows but has realy not gone out of her way to become any more involved than she needs to be ... i would like more but i do so need to make shure it's when she is ready and not force the issue,........
I guess I'm lucky in that my wife EXPECTS me to transform totally...no half measures..she says it sends confusing messages if I don't...and that's fine by me.!!!...I never did want to "half" dress...for me it's all or nothing.!
Nikki. x
Where do you find these super women.
My Wife Will NOT
- See me Dressed
- Allow any physical change that people may suspect that something is wrong
- Allow me to leave the house dressed so the neighbors will see
- Allow me to go out when I need to for fear that someone may say something
- Allow me to go out anywhere near home or the surrounding towns or cities
- Let me go back the gender specialist
But she WILL
- Buy me clothes
- Let me go out to parties
- Let me go a friends house - since it is an hour away
- Allow me to grown my hair to a point so I don't need a wig
This still leaves me in limbo living half a life
Well I guess I should say it's hard because I'm transsexual
Last edited by RiversideCT; 08-29-2006 at 03:07 PM.
AMY
my wife- whilst not liking me dressing, nevertheless helps me to a point. Strangely enough she will not agree to a wig, which for me is one of the most important parts. i cannot understand why there is a paryticular hang up with wigs.
Well there you go then, what you complaining about, theres the compromise. WE so called superwomen that your on about obviously dont have an issue with crossdressing so dont have any thing much to worry about. Your wife obviously finds some things alittle difficult to cope with, yet she's going out of her way to support you in ways that she feels more able. You are very lucky, and maybe in time she will feel more confident about showing alittle more support. In my opinion these are the true superwomen, not those of us who love it and join in wholeheartedly.Originally Posted by RiversideCT
As for the original question on how tolerant is your SO. I wanted to answer it depends on how considerate the CD is. But after reading the thread realised there was alittle more to it. Dont forget girls, this can be a very difficult time for your SOs and maybe takes some coming to terms with. In giving the support that they do demonstrate to you, they are in effect showing you how much they love you and how hard they are trying to accept this part of your life. Who knows with alittle support and encouragement they may well one day show even more acceptance. There are CDs on here who would die for what you already have so work on it, slowly and taking one step at a time. Best of luck girls.
BEVxxxxx
My wife doesn't mind me dressing, but prefers that I limit any makeup until after she has gone to sleep. Also she doesn't always want to talk about it as much as I do (understandible). I'm not very adventurous in regards to going out so there aren't really any boundaries set there. She knows I have frequently gone out with panties and tights on under my clothes though, and I often wear nail polish. She has no problem buying clothes for me either, so I feel pretty lucky!
I am only a cross dresser when I don't crossdress!
About Me: http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...595#post306595
"I don't want the world to see me, cause I don't think that they'd understand. When everything's made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am" - Goo Goo Dolls
[SIZE="3"]www.HappyDressers.com[/SIZE] - Where cross dressers go to be happy!
We have no taboos or limits. If it is anybody setting the limits it is myself. She encourages me to do everything, including going out which I am yet to do. She gives me make-up tips, lends and buys me clothes. She just wants me to be me, where that person she fell for, can be truely that.
Zara
"Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new." Albert Einstein
My wife accepts that I dress, but that is about the extent of it.
She has never bought me anything, though she has been with me when I have purchased, and certainly seen several items I have brought home.
Her biggest issues/concerns are the kids finding out, and not getting my ears pierced.
I encouraging her to talk with a close friend, of hers, that would be quite open and accepting, so that she might have someone to talk with, and maybe help her understand...but she is too embarrassed.
Hugs.
My wife is very accomodating in the compromise we worked out. I don't do anything, say anything, buy anything, or show her anything TG related and she doesn't have a fit and threaten divorce.
Warm regards,
Christina Nicole
My wife is very accomodating of my CDing. We often go shopping together. When I do dress, she insists that I give it my very best effort. My children know of my CDing as well so that is not a concern. Her only request is that I exercise care while in our neighborhood as she is ot interested in fielding a lot of questions from the neighbors. I am more than happy to accomodate this more than reasonable request.
Fulltime girl on the inside.
Lipstick=confidence
[SIZE=4]Holly[/SIZE]
Very tolerant.
I have no set limits. But I do not shove it in her face. I do know that she would just as soon it would all go away. She has told me this quite clearly. But as I have expalained to her that this has been with me for as long as I can remember, and since we are both approaching retirement, that has been some time. So she understands that it is NOT going away.
I do try and include her. I always ask for her opinion when I leave the house dressed. "Do I look OK, dear?" And I am very careful to make sure she gets plenty of the man she married. And I love her to pieces. I make sure she knows that above all else.
So far this has been working well. I am COMPLETELY relaxed and happy about what I am doing and where I am going. As I have said before, it's like a song in my heart.
Lovies,
Stephenie
I realize that after tonight's conversation the only way to continue with my wife is to make Amy go away.
AMY
the only time my SO has any issues with it, is when we are shopping and I want to go to all the stores and browse, and spend lots and lots of money *grins*
the way I did it, I kinda forced the issue before we ever went serious, when we were still in that talking about potential relashinship stage. I was at the point after my EX was so anti, that I wouldn't go into a relashinship with someone again that couldn't accept it. I was actually expecting to get an e-mail later telling me to forget the whole thing and I was just to weird to date *grins* I lucked out
Good luck Sister! If I could be all man, or all woman, I'd take it in a heartbeat. I think you need to be happy. I think to prevent you from seeing a therapist is her fear you may be TS, become a woman, and then leave her. That's the chance all right. But! You may not. I think the therapist is the best idea. Whether you are TS or not, whether you get the "operation" or not. Clearing the head is always the best idea.
As usual Karren hit the nail right on the head. My wife tolerates me as her husband also.
my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress
"Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"
My wife knows of my dressing but wants nothing to do with it. I dress when she is away from home. I think she is becoming more accepting as she does allow me to buy makeup and nail polish when we are together shopping. Maybe in time I can report she is fully accepting but for now we are both happy with the situation.
[SIZE="4"]Mary Jane[/SIZE]
May those that love us, love us. Those that don't love
us may God turn their hearts. And if he can't turn their
hearts, may he turn their ankles, so we'll know them by their limping.
my wife so great. she will help me in ahy way i need help,fixes my make up and checks me out th make sure everything is o.k. but she won't go out with me and i think we could have a great time if she did.
My wife has known Janice for more than 3 decades, but would perfer her "gone". Recently after a medical episode, she has been more tolerant. Guess that we both realize that life is finite and perhaps letting things be is not as bad as some other alternatives.
Janice Ailene:
I don't think that's possible, or at least healthy. My experiences with my (TS) father make that pretty clear. I can't imagine the anger at God, the universe, and everything for being born in the "wrong" body. Turned inward, this is a sure path to depression and suicide. Turned outward, well, I know the results of that a bit too well.
The question is: How long have these restrictions been in place, and how much have they changed over time? You may not be remembering progress made.
So far my wife has been supportive and has even bought me some lingerie. I think she'll be ok seeing me fully dressed, but there will be limits as to how often. She will not allow me to leave the house dressed, and thats ok with me. I have to make an effort to get the man things done around the house though.
im a lucky girl. when i first told my girlfriend we decided to bring the dressing into the bedroom. since then we're planning to take me out in NYC and have a drag theme party when she gets back to school.
My wife has always been very open minded yet, for some stupid reason I went about 13 years keeping my crossdressing years hidden in my past and left only to occasional fantasies. Probably fear of rejection, perhaps shame....I'm not sure. Then one day we are watching HBO's Sexbytes (or some show like that) the segment featured in detail a married couple's cross-dressing/role reversal kinks (the passable guy is fully dressed, ****ty - lingerie, spiked heels, wig and great makeup) and my wife blurts out "god, that's so hot"....there it was, hanging in the air....my opening. So, I spill it - the whole thing.
To answer the question, my wife was very supportive. Soon she helped me buy my first pair of high heels and some sexy things from Victoria's Secret. What probably helped things is that my wife had been somewhat bisexual prior to us being together. After the first rush of the experiences, she has cooled a bit. I probably was a bit to enthusiastic. My wife has asked me not to shave my chest and she thinks that it's not a good idea for me to go out in the world as Paula. I'm not sure I want to anyway and I'm always on the look out for clothes that have a higher neckline.
Posting Permissions
