O U T ! ! !

**Patty** · 10-12-2006, 08:45 AM

Congratulations

**Roberta Lynn** · 10-12-2006, 09:38 AM

I'm really happy for you Tammi.

I can only imagine how your emotions are on a see-saw between relief an trepidation. It's great you've cleared the first hurdle.
Hopefully she will keep asking questions and you and your wife will have many more long talks.
Wishing the best for you and your family.

Roberta

**Tamara Croft** · 10-12-2006, 09:59 AM

The hardest part is over, just those 4 little words 'I am a crossdresser'

I can only imagine how hard is was for you telling her. Congrats to you

**ColleenCD** · 10-12-2006, 10:20 AM

Tammi, You made the best of a bad situation. You've revealed the deepest part of your being to the person that matters the most. She may be looking deeper to see what else is down there. Give her time. By calling you, she is re-establishing the basis of your relationship...love. She is reminding you that you matter. Be still and let her come to you to talk more. Remember to reciprocate to her needs as she accepts yours.

Colleen

**bgirl** · 10-12-2006, 12:06 PM

I am happy for you. I had a similar experience with my wife and like you, it was a positive experience. We are still a work in progress, and love does make the world go around.We had always talked about everything, and now we can even talk about this. Take a deep breath, slow down and get ready for an interesting journey of discovery.

**Janice Ashton** · 10-12-2006, 12:21 PM

Good Luck Tammi I sincerely hope it all works out for you I've been there and I know how much elation you must be feeling right now. It will not be easy but I hope it all goes well. I was not so lucky but it does not mean you cannot be if you go about things in the right way.
Best wishes Louise

**Siobhan Marie** · 10-12-2006, 12:30 PM

[SIZE="3"]Congratulations Tammi on coming out to your wife, you've definately got more guts than I have. Just remember whatever happens, we're here for you. I do sincerely hope that everything works out for you.

Anna Marie x[/SIZE]

**Marla GG** · 10-12-2006, 12:50 PM

Phew!

You must be so relieved to finally have everything on the table, although I can tell you are a little worried too. It will be okay Tammi.

Gosh, I remember that post of yours from eons ago when your wife found your breastforms (I am too lazy to go look for it now

) -- you have come such a long, long way baby!

I think you know that the post discosure "normalcy" and calm will probably not last. Unless you are extremely fortunate, there will almost certainly be more emotional upheaval when the shock wears off and it truly sinks in. For a lot of us gals the first reaction is to try to pretend that nothing has happened. It is an emotional defense mechanism and an attempt to stabilize the situation, and I think it's a normal part of the acceptance process.

Big hugs to your wife from all the GGs here, although she doesn't know us. Perhaps one day she will -- I sure hope so! It is sounding pretty good so far.

Love, Marla xx

**Sharon** · 10-12-2006, 12:53 PM

Very cool, Tammi -- your honesty about yourself is commendable and, I'm sure, very liberating.

I'm hopeful that all remains well in the future for you and your wife, but just being totally honest with her may eliminate many problems. When a spouse is hiding something from the other, especially something as big as this, the other half can usually sense it, but is unaware of what the secret really is. This question in her mind is now gone. You just need to continue being the same loving person you have always been.

**Julie York** · 10-12-2006, 12:58 PM

So.......Does this mean you're gay then?

What? Stop staring at me.

**Shelly Preston** · 10-12-2006, 01:03 PM

Congratulations Tammi to you and your wife

Your for having the courage to tell her, and her for being so understanding.
Yes there will be more hurdles to overcome, and hopefully, through talking you both find a soloution, which makes you both happy.

**paulaN** · 10-12-2006, 02:42 PM

See what this forum did to you. It gave you the courage to come out to your wife. And that's a good thing. Sounds like your wife is a good thing too. I Wish the both of you the very best.

**secrets** · 10-12-2006, 03:01 PM

I love to hear good news, there's so much that can go wrong when you tell your loved ones.
I always think that if your s/o loves you then they will accept you for who you are whatever happens. I told my wife shortly after we started dating, she was fine, she took it all in and was surprisingly uninterested in the whole thing!
I know how you feel to have that huge weight lifted off you.
Just think, your wife just got a new girlfriend!

**janelle** · 10-12-2006, 03:11 PM

Hi Tammi, Iam happy for you & pray all will go along as you hoped for. Be kind & gentle & very loving & i believe all should be well, just keep talking if she wishes.
Hugs & kisses for for you that the stress of hiding things should be over.
Good luck Dear & God bless.

Janelle

**kathy gg** · 10-12-2006, 03:11 PM

Tammi I am very proud of you. By all your posts and the way you write I imagine you to be a thoughtful {not to mention forgiving!} and considerate husband. I am hoping that is what she focused on as this info unfolded....and by the sounds of it she is considering the *big picture*...... you are a good husband and father and have been patient with her. SOmething that is very very rare to find in a spouse now-a-days.

Take the next steps one and at a time. Thanks for sharing your story, I hope it will inspire others!

**Janelle Young** · 10-12-2006, 06:14 PM

Tammi,

It doesn't matter if your coming out to your wife was by your choice, or if it was forced on you. The important part is that you have told her and done it in such a way that she is still talking to you. Congratulations on your success. This is a long process that is just starting, I hope the rest of it goes as well as the first part has.

**RenaCD** · 10-12-2006, 07:12 PM

Tammi well done!

O I think you need another!

Rena

**Tracy Lynn** · 10-12-2006, 07:24 PM

Hi Tammi,

Congratulations on coming out to your wife. I know how difficult it can be. I wish you both success in your relationship.

**ShannonDragon** · 10-12-2006, 09:42 PM

The one thing I did was tell my future wife about my dressing. I came out to her after we had been dating for about 4-5 weeks. We dated for 5 years and got married that Fall after she graduated. Best thing I ever did!

**uknowhoo** · 10-12-2006, 09:45 PM

OMG! I have literally laughed (thanks Julie, though you had promised not to tell!!

) and cried reading your responses. I can't believe how emotional I am today. I wish I could respond to each of you individually, but the Mrs. is about ready for bed and I think it best not to stay up two hours later than her tonight, reading, posting and IMming.

Tomorrow a.m. my wife, 6 y/o son and I are flying to FL for a few days, to celebrate my parents' 50th anniversary.

It'll prolly be Tuesday before I can check in again, and provide an update.

Thank you all soooooo very much. Your support and encouragement mean more than you could know.

xoxo

Tammi

**Glenda58** · 10-12-2006, 10:05 PM

Congrats Tammi looks like you have a great wife by your side. Now treat her to something nice so she knows how much you love her for being so understanding about CDing. Don't buy her cloths take to a stage show and dinner. Make her feel special.

Di · 10-13-2006, 02:53 AM

Well done...very happy for you.....just awesome.

**suzanne** · 10-13-2006, 03:24 AM

Congratulations! Your SO is definitely a keeper. Big bonus if she is the same size as you. lol I am always envious when a CD get complete acceptance from her SO. I came out to my wife years ago and she is still on the fence about my preferences. I can wear any of my dresses in front of her, but she gives the impression she can't bring herself to see me as suzanne. When I try to discuss how I feel, she either shuts down or changes the subject, saying she needs more time. A bit of a denial master, if you ask me. She appears to love me in spite of my feminine side, rather than embrace it as an essential part of a whole ME. Mind you, I admit it's hard to see a balding, hairy 275 pounder as feminine in any way!!!

To many, this will all seem like whining, as I probably get more than my fair share of acceptance. I know the issue destroys entire relationships for some couples, so I'm fortunate that way. I just can't help feeling I want more than that. I keep hoping to find that outfit that will make her say "You don't look half bad". Baby steps

**Sam-antha** · 10-13-2006, 05:33 AM

Have a good holiday break and welcome home to yours and to us when you get back.
~Samm

**Wendy me** · 10-13-2006, 05:57 AM

Tammi wow OK sorry i am late with this ...frist off well done on getting it out with your wife ... now the ever present worry of getting busted is gone ... as she knows the only thing is how if ever she See's you dressed that will play out latter....

your a smart girl so no one needs to tell you about small steps ... and from what i have read so far things are looking good .... just keep on showing her you love her and don't push things .... you just gave her a huge thing to not only hear but to let soak in .... well done and best of wishes ....

huge Wendy hugs.......

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