Originally Posted by
Jillian310
A different viewpoint: It seems to me that whenever a thread discusses married and/or CD’s in ‘committed relationships’ who have relationships outside of those situations, with either and/or both genders, including kissing and dare I use the “S” word - SEX - one of the first responses, echoed by subsequent responders, is “.....does the SO know about it, and if not, that is cheating.”, as if this so-called cheating is some kind of holy grail. Those of us that have a different point of view are regularly and consistently put down by those posters. While that is certainly their right to have and express that opinion, I have a different opinion which I also have a right to express which is as follows: I do not have nor do I hold any religious beliefs, and am therefore not restrained in my actions by what I believe is an artificial prior constraint on what I believe are human urges for multiple relationships, including having sex with more than one person, and depending on one’s diversity, with both sexes and other races wherever and whenever the desire and opportunity presents itself. Is this amoral? Depends on what one’s so-called morals may be. Is this a libertine point of view? Again, so-called morals are the basis of this appellation. What it seems to me to come down to is a tension between those who have none of and therefore feels no tug from these so-called morals which have their basis in religious theory, and those who are not imbued with these so-called morals, which by their very nature require a compulsion to impose those beliefs on others.
From my free-wheeling perspective, there is no problem with having ‘outside’ relationships, perhaps including sex, at my option, kept from my SO. I frankly don’t consider that to be any of her business!
CDing does have a definite sexual component for me. I feel sexy when dressed, and respond to individuals from both sexes if there is a mutual attraction. My dressing tends to be a bit provocative, and consciously so! I enjoy the company of men and women who are attracted to me.
The so-called marriage vows are a sham. If they were taken seriously, there would not be a greater than 50% divorce rate. A whopping percentage of divorce comes from so-called cheating. So much for those ‘vows’. Marriage merely provides a more comfortable life-style, and eases the having and rearing of children. Sooner or later those in the minority of this statistic will become an even more insignificant number, and fidelity in marriage will be seen by many in the majority who merely live together in greater and greater numbers as a quaint custom practiced by reactionaries.
Those that believe that SO’s have only one secret - cross dressing - and having ‘confessed’ and been forgiven for that trespass have no other secrets about their cross dressing, are naive to say the least, in my opinion. Sooner or later the other shoe will fall, notwithstanding all the pious mouthings of the ‘perpetrators’ and the ‘forgiveness’ of the ‘liberators’.
As for me, I am very content and secure in living out what nature has obviously intended for me without the artificial constraints of straight-jacket religious dogma and hypocritical society in much of the CD community. In the final analysis, haven’t the closeted CD’s who have kept their ‘secret’ from the SO really been ‘cheating’ with their femme persona? Hasn’t ‘she’ really been ‘the secret other female’ in the mix?