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Thread: Concerned about your identity?

  1. #1
    Aspiring Member Lacy PJs's Avatar
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    Concerned about your identity?

    I don't go outside the home, so I don't try to pass. I have wondered about buying some custom made things though either mail order or by the Internet. But I'm concerned about my identity.

    I just wondered if any of you have similar thoughts...

  2. #2
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    No, i have bot many things on the net and have had no problems.

  3. #3
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    HI Lacy, I have purchased numerous items over the net and never had a problem, sites with PAYPAL are very secure and discrete and to be honest the sellers are only wanting to sell, just make sure you have a secure mailing address and then off you go girl.
    Samantha

  4. #4
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    My identity

    Thought about being concerned once but then I forgot about it. Hey I'm blonde, whaddya want? Ericka/Rich

  5. #5
    Aspiring Member KateW's Avatar
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    I have ordered lots of things online and never had a problem. Well, except when things don't fit, but that's a different story! Anyway, you can always claim the parcel is a gift if a nosey postman takes a peep before delivering it.
    I am only a cross dresser when I don't crossdress!

    About Me: http://www.crossdressers.com/forums/...595#post306595

    "I don't want the world to see me, cause I don't think that they'd understand. When everything's made to be broken, I just want you to know who I am" - Goo Goo Dolls

    [SIZE="3"]www.HappyDressers.com[/SIZE] - Where cross dressers go to be happy!

  6. #6
    Dreaming in Color! ColleenCD's Avatar
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    Lacy,

    I use the net for many things, though more and more I have purchased in drab. At some level I simply have to let it go. If Colleen's identity is more than the UPS driver can bear, He better get a new job.

    Colleen
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Feeling pretty on the inside.

  7. #7
    Pausing To Femme-flect melissacd's Avatar
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    I have only purchased a few things online and instead I have forced myself to get out there en drab and buy my things. First I enjoy the process and experience of looking at and touching the items and second by doing this it has helped me get past my concern about people knowing that I am buying things for me. That in turn has made it easier for me to go out in public dressed and to post real pictures of me dressed without my face hidden.

    The simple act of shopping in person has really helped me to better accept this part of me and I am finding that a lot of women out there who see what I purchase actually think and say that I have good taste in clothing, so I get the added benefit of an ego boost from the experience.

    It is very much a face the fear and you will overcome that obstacle process.

    My 2 cents.
    What stop do I get off at? Hmmm...

  8. #8
    Member Lori SC's Avatar
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    You feel as if everyone is watching your every move, every thing you do.

    It ain't so. Unless you have police survellience on you for some reason, no one is going to know or care what gets delivered to your home in any reasonable sized boxes. You won't be able to tell who it's from by the return address in many cases.

    To make my point, what did every neighbor of yours receive in the mail in the past month? Come on now, I want your detailed list....

    Go ahead and buy. Whatever you want.

    Just be aware that you will receive catalogs from the companies you purchase from. Those with x rated products will arrive in plain non-descript envelopes. Things like wigs, Victorias Secret are very visible for any one to see, in case you live in an apartment building.

    If you are still paranoid, a solution is to rent a PO box at a mailboxes etc, or something like that.

    I bought a lot of things and received them through the mail. No problems with the neighbors. My wife didn't even know until I told her!

    Hugs, Lori

  9. #9
    Must...Buy...Clothes... Katrina's Avatar
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    I've bought two pairs of shoes from one place (I forget where), a few cute shirts from VS, some goodies from Fredericks, and some clothes from Macys. That said, shopping in person is 1000x better. I love the act of shopping in a store...and I'm getting better about not caring what other people think.
    -Katrina

    It's the shoes...

    ...putting the "T" in GLBT.

    The world would be a better place if everybody learned yoga...

    Rated "TG"...for some gender bending

  10. #10
    Silver Member trannie T's Avatar
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    I love it when the package comes with big red letters saying "TO THE TRANSVESTITE AT 112 S FAIRFIELD."
    It takes a real man to wear a dress.

  11. #11
    Miss Conception Karren H's Avatar
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    Most of the venders that I deal with (hair, breast forms and corsets) know that I crossdress and know my real name and work address.....And Victoria Secret knows I buy lingerie....they keep sending me catalogues and email.....They also know my real name and work address!!! Soooo... Doesn't matter...Buyer is always right!!!

    Love Karren
    Current Obsession - Breasts and Lingerie!

    .......My Photos

  12. #12
    Member gwenrob43's Avatar
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    I've ordered many things over the net. Most things have been delivered by either UP or US Postal Service. Our rural postal carrier blows the horn or her car if she is bringing a package. When she drove into the drive the other day and blew the horn, I pulled off my wig, quickly removed my breast forms and ran outside. I was lucky, I was still in 3 pocket girl jeans and wearing navy blue flats. I didn't realize it until I was halfway there, but I quickly decided to bite the bullet. She handed me my new shoes from Lane Bryant and all was well. I don't think she ever looked at my feet or my jeans. I've never been challenged at a store either, no matter what I purchased.
    Don't worry about being discovered. I'm out running errands frequently en femme and live in a small town to boot. No one's discovered. I will say this, I am very observant when I'm out.

    Hugs, Gwen

  13. #13
    Aspiring Member Lacy PJs's Avatar
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    Identity

    I'm not so concerned about the actual delivery of the package but rather the purchasing process itself. "Mr. John Smith of Anytown, USA, just bought a custom-made pink lycra skating outfit in size 3XL." That wouldn't fit his wife, so it must be for HIM!

    In a conservative community, that kind of information could easily wreck one's career if someone wanted to do so.

    I don't have a "second identity" for any credit cards, checking accounts, etc; that was my major concern.

    Just curious...

    Lacy PJs

  14. #14
    Welcome to Moonbase AprilMae's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lacy PJs View Post
    I'm not so concerned about the actual delivery of the package but rather the purchasing process itself. "Mr. John Smith of Anytown, USA, just bought a custom-made pink lycra skating outfit in size 3XL." That wouldn't fit his wife, so it must be for HIM!

    In a conservative community, that kind of information could easily wreck one's career if someone wanted to do so.

    I don't have a "second identity" for any credit cards, checking accounts, etc; that was my major concern.

    Just curious...

    Lacy PJs

    Most mail order places work at such a pace and are automated to a poiont where they won't study your order. And how would they know WHAT size your wife is and if you even have a wife or not. I've bought every type of female item online over rhe years, I get most of my male stuff as well. I just don't care to deal with the mall scene anymore. Mailmen and UPS drivers don't care what is in the box. When I lived in an Apartment, UPS would leave the package with my neighbor sometimes, he never cared, No one cares. Unless you have to keep secret froma wife or parent, there is nothing wrong with having things sent to your home. A lot of times we get too wrapped up in our paranoia.
    "My Mother wanted me to find a nice girl..so I became one."

  15. #15
    Member myMichelle's Avatar
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    Lmao

    Quote Originally Posted by trannie T View Post
    I love it when the package comes with big red letters saying "TO THE TRANSVESTITE AT 112 S FAIRFIELD."
    Are you sure you're not from Transexual, Transulvania?
    "poor is the man whose pleasures depend on the permission of another." Madonna "Justify My Love"

  16. #16
    New Member paola w's Avatar
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    I buy shoes in large sizes in my male idendity.I don't care,no-one cares as long as you pay.paola.

  17. #17
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    I buy everything in person, largely because I do so love to shop. That being said on the net you are not a real person, just some bits and bytes flashing by. Money into the recived section, inventory number out. Nothing more.

  18. #18
    Gold Member JenniferR771's Avatar
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    buying

    I belong to a transgender support group that has about 20 crossdressers and transexuals and very few female to male people.
    One of the Ftms (lesbian of course) worked at the Penny's catalog phone center. She(he) had hair about one-fourth inch long. She (he) got a call from an embarrassed crossdresser who wanted to order some panties, "Can you help me?"
    "You have so called the right person! I can really help you!"
    Company rules prevented her (him) from discussing her personal life, but she(he) of course was very helpful. She knew 20 crossdressers.

  19. #19
    Member crossing-the-rain's Avatar
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    Hi Lacy,Don't worry the sellers on net,they are nice and doesn't mind your real name or I.D. I purchased every things on net .
    Rain.

  20. #20
    On Cloud 9, or is it 10? ErikaLeigh's Avatar
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    I am slowly getting to the point where I dont care what people think. I am still in the closet for the most part, and very picky where I buy things in guy mode, unless online. And I am finding out that what most of the girls on here say is true, most people just dont care what you buy. I started out buying things online, and got myself a P.O. box to send alll of my things too. Then I got a little more brave, and bought shoes at payless.com and had them sent to a local store (free shipping that way) and picked them up in person. I have since acquired about 25-30 pairs of shoes that way. I have bought a little make up in retail stores, and a few pairs of pantyhose, but have yet to go into a store and try things on. I just take my chances so far with the online clothes fitting for now. Now if I had a shopping partner, I would probably go nuts. My next goal I have set for myself, is to get a pedicure. Just take baby steps, and will work out.
    Erika Leigh

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lacy PJs View Post
    I don't go outside the home, so I don't try to pass. I have wondered about buying some custom made things though either mail order or by the Internet. But I'm concerned about my identity.

    I just wondered if any of you have similar thoughts...
    I use the Internet,it is safe,and anonymous.I have ordered several outfits,
    shoes,pantyhose,without any trouble

  22. #22
    New Member LisaMariaCD's Avatar
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    Well, I don't mind buying online from VS or Fredericks. I figure a sizable part of their online business is to CD's....

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lacy PJs View Post
    I'm not so concerned about the actual delivery of the package but rather the purchasing process itself. "Mr. John Smith of Anytown, USA, just bought a custom-made pink lycra skating outfit in size 3XL." That wouldn't fit his wife, so it must be for HIM!

    In a conservative community, that kind of information could easily wreck one's career if someone wanted to do so.

    I don't have a "second identity" for any credit cards, checking accounts, etc; that was my major concern.

    Just curious...

    Lacy PJs
    Dear Lacy,

    Your paranoid imagination is getting the better of you. On the web you are nothing but a stream of 1s and 0s. And at the other end they don't care, and can't tell who the item ordered is for. How do they know it won't fit your wife? Do they know your wife? Of course not. If the pink lycra skating outfit is offered in 3XL, then there is a market for it. People are buying it. You are not the ONLY 3XL in the world. There are PLENTY of 3XL women arround. And you could just as easily be married to one of them. Relax, sweety. The world is not paying ANY attention to you. You don't need a separate identity. Listen to Auntie Stephenie, please. THEY DON'T CARE who is buying their pink lycra skating outfit. They just want to sell it. Also dear, they don't have TIME to obsess over who you are or what you wear. Once the order is out the door they are on to the next one. Your paranoia is totally misplaced. Shopping is sooo much fun, dear. Please relax and enjoy it.

    Lovies,
    Stephenie

  24. #24
    Aspiring Member shannonsilk's Avatar
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    now would be a good time to shop online bbecause you can always claim it is a christmas present (if anyone asks-which they won't) . i've been buying stuff at the thrift shops and there are only 2 and i've been in there a few times, but nobody cares when I buy a dress

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