Under the Influence of Estrogen

[joanlynn28]

Well it has now been over 43 days since I started HRT and after the initial bad first couple of weeks now I am feeling a lot btter. The first month I was nauseous all the time. (Now I know what it is like to have morning sickness) I had no real appetite during this period and to make matters worse I could not get more than a couple of hours of sleep every night for almost two weeks. I was at the point of asking myself, I'm I going crazy? It was so bad for a while that I was serously thinking of jumping in front of the northbound Amtrak headed for Los Angeles to end it all. But than things started to change for the better, I stopped taking my blood pressure medication, I think between the Lisinopril and Spirilactone was the reason I could not sleep. Both of them used together for controlling blood pressure could possibly have the opposite effect. I have been monitoring my blood pressure and it is in the normal range dispite not taking the Lisinopril. And now the past two weeks I have been feeling great. I am realizing that now I am the happiest that I have been in a very long time. Because I can actually be myself, the beautiful woman that has been hiding inside this shell of a man is finally free. Its great to finally be able to be myself. I can't really see any physical changes yet, but I know they are happening. Two days ago I noticed how soft my skin has become, not in any specific area but all over. And today at work I bumped onto something with my chest and my left areola actually was sensitive to the touch. And when I got home and changed out of my work clothes I touched both of my areolas with my finger tip and it actually hurt to do it. So I am excited that the early signs of breast developement are happening. So the changes are happening, slowly but surely. My thighs are filling out now too, my legs look more like a girl's legs than a guy's. Soon I will probably be able to toss out the padded briefs and put the breast forms up for bid on Ebay. Now if only I could find myself a date for New Years Eve, I bought my party dress and shoes to match, so I am ready to ring in the New Year. Because I know that 2007 is going to be a great year for me. Until the next update wishing you all well in the coming year.

[Marcie Sexton]

Good for you...glad you're doing better...GOOD LUCK

[Scotty]

That's a wonderful feeling!!

Going off hormones is pretty rough, if you have to ever do that do it SLOWLY.....I have been an emotional roller coaster for the past week, mainly angry a lot and I don't like it, not one bit. But it's wearing off.
I still don't like NOT being on them, I so know how you feel and it's a truly PLEASANT feeling.

One th ing to note, I found that I sleep FAR FAR better when on hormones, I'm noticing my sleep pattern the past week has been disrupted. You too may find that it settles in and you sleep wonderfully.

Hopefully my digestive thing is just a food allergy and I can go back on low doses, I miss that feeling!!! I'll know next week when I go back to the doc.


As for the breasts, well while it hurts it too is a wonderful feeling. My sensitivity has gone down the past week but I still feel them jiggle when I don't wear a bra - and there is something wonderful about having breasts, something I really really enjoy.

The hormones for me would be emotional only at this point, although if I can get another half an inch in I'd love it, if not I'm pleased with where I am.

I'm full A cup at exactly one year on hormones, but I only did a 4mg per day regiment and only about half of the time, the other half was 2mg. You will be suprised how fast they start growing in a few months.

Keep us posted!!

[SusanTL]

Hi.

Congradulations.... You will feel even better as time passes. I have been on HRT for a while now and once your body gets acustimed to it. You will feel like a total female. The good and the bad. Somtimes I cry at movies for no reason. My gg friends tell me, its a girl thing. Get used to it.

Remember - A bad day as a female, is better then the best day as a male.

No offense to my ftm friends.

Susan

[Andrea Nicole]

Hi,
I pray for your healthy and happy transition.
Huggs,
Andi..

[michelle19845]

hope all goes well for you.i will be starting hormones soon.i can't wait.i already take things to keep moods in tack.i am excited to see the body start reshaping too.have a great time and keep us posted on how things are developing.thanks a bunch.


michelle19845

[Kimkandy]

I take Lisinopril and Beta Blockers. I was going to talk to doctor about HRT in the new year. I'm switching doctors as I've moved.

Kim

[Stormgirl]

That is awesome and I hope that things continue to get better for you and you have a great 2007. Btw I like your title.

[RonnaDee]

Dear Joan:

I too am taking hormone treatment. In fact today will be my 90th day.
I have not experienced any nauseous side effects and my sleep pattern in very good. I am taking the slow gradual approach to the treatment and increasing the dosage with time. I also have noted the increase in size of my aeroles and sensitivity of my breasts. They becoming larger and more prominent. I am enjoying this change and can not wait to see what the full effect will be after one and two years.


RonnaDee. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you!!!

Let the changes continue.


"I wish I were a girl, that is what I really want to be, for if I were a girl, then everyone would be in love with me."

[Jenna1561]

I am so happy for you. I hope everything settles down for you and you can fully enjoy the coming changes. Lucky Girl.


Jenna

[MarieTS]

JoanLynn: I never experienced any of the nausea you described, but everything else is pretty identical. Isn't it wonderful!
Oh, and stay off the train tracks: San Diego County is much pretty when viewed from the train, not under it!
What outfit did you get for New Year's? I'm sure your future date will be pleased!

[joanlynn28]

Well it is now into my third month of HRT and all is going to plan. Yes everyone around me are noticing the changes going on. And today, I finally went and had that long talk with the HR department and it went extremely well. The really care about my well being because they know that happy and healthy employees are going to be productive ones. And productive I have been the past month, now that I am truely happy I feel great not fighting myself internally. And the HR people can see the changes too my time is getting ever closer to being fulltime. That is why I finally had the talk because the physical changes is taking place and are very noticable now. No outwardly visible breast developement yet, but my nipples are tender and hurt if I bump into them. And they appear flat in the morning but as the day wears on they get fuller and to touch them they feel like a woman's now, they are soft but firm as they slowly develope. And my skin is soft everywhere, I have female skin on every square inch of my body and love it. So what is the next step, it is to meet again with my direct HR rep and discuss with him my timeline to going live, the last step to being fulltime. It is this little 8 1/2 hours of my day where Joan is not around, eventhough I am physically there. But maybe I am fooling myself because I think I am still hiding to others but I am not. They know so it is time to just officially come out and live it. Because that day is already here and it is time for me to just acknowledge it. Which I finally have. And knowing that diversity and inclusion is embraced by my employer is making it a little easier with a difficult situation, just grateful that there are those who care out there, at work and with family, and family is what matters most.

[Scotty]

The next few months will be tender, and when you slip into a door sideways and hit the door frame you will feel it!!

That happens after some growth as you won't be used to having them out further.

Congrats, glad to hear all is going well!!!

I'm halfway to a B cup but my dose is so low it's only for mood enhancement now but hopefully go back full time on HRT in the next month or two - still gotta go see the doc first.


Keep us posted!!

[rocval2001]

Joan - good for you. I wish you all the best

[Calliope]

Joan! Keep on keepin' on, babe!

Your posts really bring me up!

[Sarahgurl371]

Joan I am glad to read that your employer is OK with your transition. Just one less thing to have to worry about. I wish you the best.

[mollytyler]

Joan
Sonds as if you are embracing al the changes...so great that your HR dept is working with you....I guess co-employees can see changes and hope they are as co-operative as your HR people
Having been 10+ years on a progrm I can sympathize with your early experience and just let you know that things will get beter and better with time. I am also assuming you are under a good doctor's following for proper blood workups as you progress.....Had orchiectomy 6 year ago and was a great releive to downsize the doses....now just a .25 estradiol shot every three weeks and better way as it is intrarmuscular rather than going through the liver etc.
Embrace your new changes and look forward to your time when you are 24/7!!!! it is truly wonderful!!!
Love
Molly