Why do we dress

[Olesha]

Girls
I've been thinking about this. Its afternoon in England and I'm in the middle of cleaning the house, wearing a skirt, panties and hold up stockings. Shortly I will have to change as my wife will soon be home ( we will shortly amicably divorce ) and she doesn't know. I feel great and am sure I vacuum better!!!!!!
There are times like these that I need to dress, times when I want to look lika a women, but at other times I am happy with just lingerie. Womens' lingerie feels better than mens' underclothes.
At other times there is an undeniable sexual connection. Last Saturday I stayed with my lady friend who knows and doesn't mind. We had dinner with her wearing a basque and stockings and me in a bustiere, stockings and a thong. Afterwards.......
Am I just confused?
Hugs
Olesha

[Tristen Cox]

No I don't think you're confused. Just exploring your other side. Holdng it back can do more damage in the long run. Just be yourself when you can. And do it for you and let no one else force it upon you. My opinion only.



*hugs*
Tristen

[racheal]

I don't think that you are confused either, Olesha. This comes 'naturally'. Once it get a hold of you, it's hard to stop. Actually, who would want to stop anyway? Let it progress on it's own natural course - you are also lucky that you have an SO that completely doesn't mind.

[Rachel Elizabeth]

You may be confused but I don't think you are confused about this subject.

I dress because it makes me feel like the person I really am. I don't dress around the house unless my wife is gone on a trip. She knows but she doesn't like it and I will respect her wishes.
I came out to my sister about 4 years ago. She, at first, was surprised. After 6 months, she told me that it was no big deal and that it was easier talking to me as a "sister" than a brother.

We have gone shopping together, dinner, etc. When I do see her en drab, she says it is really strange and that she would prefer me being Rachel.

So....we all dress for our own reasons. I don't think you are confused. Confusion leads to questioning and discovery. Discovery leads to enlightenment.

Hugs.....

[Wendy me]

confused?????????????????look at who thinks thay are normal..............thay are confused,.....................................

[racheal]

confused?????????????????look at who thinks thay are normal..............thay are confused,.....................................

Very, very true. Who can actually define 'normal' or 'real'? Uh oh, heading towards the Matrix quotes - not good.

[lady lycra]

Olesha, you are very much like me.
I often do the houswork dressed. I did today in my new sportswear
And yes, I do not only a better job, but I do more.
The other day my wife was amazed at how much I did. 4 loads of washing, hoovered (vacuumed for our trans atlantic friends) polished ( I never do this normally), and I even cleaned the kitchen floor.

I just told her that I was in the mood.
I didn't tell her that I was in a short black leather skirt, black panties, tights, boots, and a white silky top and a choker neclace and wearing bright red lipstick

Maybe I should have. Perhaps she'd feel better about my desires and let me do it?

I agree with your feelings too.
Sometimes it's just nice to do, sometimes it's sexual.
I often wear lingerie under my drab clothes, yes it does feel great. I love the feeling of tights under jeans and the way my feet feel inside my shoes.

If you are confused then I'm in the same boat. It's not confusion.
I wonder why people smoke, I can't see any sense in it, dressing is my smoking.
It makes me feel better. It relaxes me, it cheers me up, etc etc etc . All the reasons smokers give, I can give for why I dress.
The difference for me is that my wife wouldn't flip out if she caught me having a cigarette

You are VERY VERY lucky to have a girlfriend who not only allows you to dress but actively supports and encourages you. I'd love to be in that situation.

Linda

[racheal]

Sportswear - I LOVE sportswear! Sport Bras, Panties, cheerleader uniforms - MMMM...

[Sweet Susan]

You are hardly confused. No, you are living and behaving as suits you, which is what life should be about. Wouldn't life be really interesting if men were socially allowed to crossdress to the extent that women do? Makes me excited just thinking about the possibilities.

[Holly]

Hi Olesha,

Definately NOT confused. It's just part of the journey in getting from point A to point B. The road takes many twists and turns. Sometimes we have to stop and get directions. At least is sounds like you have someone to help you along the way.
That's a step ahead of a lot of us. Do keep in touch.

[DonnaT]

Girls
I've been thinking about this. Its afternoon in England and I'm in the middle of cleaning the house, wearing a skirt, panties and hold up stockings.

Hi Olesha

If I'm doing houswork, I prefer to be dressed too. Usually in my maids uniform

Join the club. Hmmm, I guess you did that already!

[Kate_Uhler]

Olesa

This is so cute... it made laugh...

"I feel great and am sure I vacuum better!!!!!!"

I'm sure you do.... certainly more fun...

I think i'm going to do my income taxes wearing a business womans suit.. that should help huh?

kate.

[Janet K.]

I don't really think that you are confused at all. I think we're the normal ones because we do what our bodies are telling us that we should be doing. I tried to quit when I first got married. I got rid of all of my clothes and all evidence of Juana. It lasted for about six months. By the end of the first year, I had acquired a full wardrobe of clothes, which I am constantly adding to and updating. Granted, my wife has absolutely no knowledge of Juana, and I don't think she ever will. That is a part of me that her ultra-conservative upbringing will not let her accept. Therefore, I have to pick and choose the times for me to dress the way I really want to. If I had my way, the only time I wouldn't be Juana would be when I was at work, and I guarantee that a part of Juana would still be present

[sherri]

Kate, can you deduct the suit? That would help.

[Georgette]

I'm not confused, maybe my therapist is as she says I really don't want help, but I do I don't know how long she will let me keep seeing her, but I'll wager that she won't kick me out as long as I keep the checks coming to herLOL. Yes I'm confused as to who is going to win this thing Georgette or Him and right now we are on a balance of sort he does his thing at times and I do mine.
I think I made sense didn't I?

[AnnaMaria]

I have had the same kind of thoughts in the past and I have always come to the same conclusion. If I am confussed then I will just have to stay that way. My wife knows about Anna and is ok with her. In fact since I told her about me being a cd she has been doing a lot of reading and talking to others online that are in the same situation and our relationship has become stronger because of it.

As far as the was that you dress I don't see any problem with it. If your g/f enjoies it and participates in it then you are a step farther than some of us because she has already accepted who you are and obviously has no problem with it.

So don't worry about being confussed. I have to agree with the other girls that it's everyone else that is confussed not us.

huggs
anna

[Trinity_cat]

Hi Olesha, beautiful name.

I swiped this from another forum, hope it helps.
If it doesn't, take 2 asprins and call me in the morning.


http://www.ren.org/rbp02.html

[Megan_Renee]

I suppose I dress how I was born. I remember the first time i put on a dress... I was at my neighbors house and his sister told me to put it on and that it would be fun... i remember secretly wanting to put it on, but knowing that it was not "right." it was a pretty white dress from a wedding that she had been in. she put makeup on me and did my nails... Gosh, I couldn't have been more than 10 or 11.

why do i do it? dunno... I just do...

Megan
--,--`--@

[Wendy me]

confused shure if its wrong.......whats right?????if you just feel right how can that be wrong???????? dressing up in fem being relaxed ,carefree ,loveing.........wrong?????
this is who i am .......the outher side "him" not good i don't want to be that person

[Danielle1960]

It makes me feel more complete.

[ChristineRenee]

I'm not confused, maybe my therapist is as she says I really don't want help, but I do I don't know how long she will let me keep seeing her, but I'll wager that she won't kick me out as long as I keep the checks coming to herLOL. Yes I'm confused as to who is going to win this thing Georgette or Him and right now we are on a balance of sort he does his thing at times and I do mine.
I think I made sense didn't I?

Interestingly enough Georgette, in one paragraph you state both that you are not confused and that you are confused.

You say you don't know who is going to win this thing...is it a winner take all approach on both sides? You say you have struck a balance of sort where he does his thing and you do yours...so actually, what's the problem there? Unless you are transitioning and feel that you are a woman inside trapped in a man's body, I should think a balance between the two would be an equitable way to resolve the issue. Unless what you are feeling is guilt and shame about Georgette and trying to reach a point where you can break free of her altogether. I'm not saying that is what you want, merely that I do believe that you ARE confused as to EXACTLY what you want...hence the reason you are doing therapy in the first place.

So you have to start asking yourself some pointed questions and get off the fence on this issue. 1. Who and what am I all about? 2. How do I feel about being Georgette? 3. Do I want to be Georgette 24/7 or is just being her on a part-time basis emotionally satisfying enough? 4. Do I LIKE being Georgette, or do I have some internal unresolved conflict about the need to be her and actually wish I could do without her? 5. Can I be happy and content housing two distinct and different personalities or personas in one body for the duration of my life?

While I am not a therapist, I have been doing this for over 40 years now and have gone to 3 different therapists within that time since 1991. I probably got the most knowledge and education about who and what I am and am about from the woman therapist I first saw in 1991. I had 7 sessions with her before I realized there wasn't any reason to continue on because I pretty much had a handle on what I needed to do from there. The 5 questions above, I believe, will go along way to helping you to resolve this emotional conflict that you are presently going through. If you can answer them all honestly, this should help you to come to some conclusions as to where being a CD is all going to go for you on down the road of life.

As alway Georgette, you are part of a wonderful community of caring, supporting, and loving people who only want the best for you in life. Please continue to "draw from the well" here as needed as we will always be right here for you.

I hope that this has been helpful for you.

Good luck and may God bless you.

Love,
Christine Renee

[Bernadina]

It makes me feel more complete.

I'll go along with Danielle. Also I feel very comfortable lounging at home en femme.