forgive me for this post, and by no way is it meant to cause "any" offence !!
But i wanted to ask you all, does your c/d make-up for something thats "lacking" in your life ??re: does it take-away some of the worries & troubles you have in your "everyday" life ??
from comments ive had made by Darrell, he told me before ( a few years ago) it was "somewhere to hide ".
is that similar with some of yourselves ? or is it just like a "hobbie" ??
Last edited by Iniquity Blonde GG; 03-05-2007 at 06:38 AM. Reason: word
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[SIZE=3]angie [/SIZE]
For me it is a time when I can just forget about all the other stresses of everyday life, and just relax and be me. Even if I don't really relax and I do housework while I am dressed. It is a time with a whole differant frame of mind. Still a guys mind, but without all the stress. It also somehow helps me with the lack of intimacy that is in my life at this time. I am not sure why, but when I do actually get time for Raychel, those issues do go away for a short while too.
Kinda like a good drunk without the hangover.
my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress
"Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"
Its my pressure valve, simply put.
Escaping the pressure of life to be someone else, well not really, I'm still me, put I do think it puts me in a different frame of mind, lets me see my problems from a different angle
Cross dressing has always lifted my black moods, made the light shine brighter. Anyway putting on a dress always seemed to help more than those mind-numbing pills the doctor gave me
Sometimes I feel like there are 3 people in my head, Me, my macho side and my femine side. Maybe I'm a little crazy
Me, Myself & Rachael
No it is not that with me, I kinda of wish it was then I could explain it better
Angie, thanks for the question. I can understand Darrell's comment. For me it's not so much of an escape from real life... it's more like when I get dressed, the fog lifts and I can see things more clearly. My minds seems to work at a different level when I'm in femme mode. I wouldn't characterize it as better or worse, just different. I get more personal satisfaction in girl mode, but I realize that I do have obligations and responsibilites that my male side is much better equiped to handle and deal with. My girl time even helps me uderstand how important my guy time is as well. I hope I didn't confuse you!
Fulltime girl on the inside.
Lipstick=confidence
[SIZE=4]Holly[/SIZE]
Simply put, "It's my Better Half."
Some believe the our 'sole mates' come from our soles splitting. I believe this may be true but I also believe that some of us have not split and we contain both halves within our present self. Cross/trans 'whatever' is simply allowing us to express both sides of our sole.
If you walk into a room and nobody notices, Why walk into the room?
Lacking??? Well maybe. When I'm in guy mode, I do feel sometimes that I'm lacking a bit of self expression in a way that I don't quite feel like Sandy. Maybe there's a bit of stress involved, trying to be Sam instead Sandy, whom I feel that I really am. So when I put on a dress or even a pair of nice slacks and a top, I feel more at ease with myself. When I'm dressed as Sandy, I want to do more but I'm still a bit unsure of my presentation, so I guess I'm lacking a bit of confidance as well.
I hop that that didn't confuse you as much as it did me....
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
My cding expresses a very important part of my persona that before, for whatever the many reasons, had to remain buried and hidden. Today, I have a very supportive SO and so I am becoming who I am. Cding is not all I am but it is a very important part of who I am.
Feeling more complete is one thing. I am sure there are many more reasons I cd and many that are still unbeknownst to me or anyone else for that matter.
Hugs
Lovely Rita
The journey is about learning how to love and to do it with all our heart.
The Revolution moves forward!!!!!
aspiring to be "part of the cure and not the disease."
to quote Cold Play.
Becoming the person I was created to be
not the person you expect me to be
"Girls Just Want to Have FUN!"
You don't need an excuse to Love just an opportunity!
Well, it used to make up for my inability (read: put red hot pokers places I didn't want red hot pokers, I wasn't letting on) to express a part of my nature, or even admit to others it exists. But when I crossdressed I let myself be that part of me too. Now my dressing simply expresses the real me.
Androgynes: the quantum bits of the gender binary.
yes i can understand some of ur statements
Last edited by Iniquity Blonde GG; 03-05-2007 at 11:25 AM. Reason: worded incorrectly
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[SIZE=3]angie [/SIZE]
Well wicked, in my case I believe that being jenni allows me to be the "real" me. In drab male mode I feel that I am acting, having to play the part of being male. I have done this most of my life, I can certainly portray a guy, but my inner self knows that I am most happy when jenni is able to be here.
Super Mod
Oh God, Thy sea is so great and my boat is so small
The Breton Fisherman's Prayer was engraved on a brass plaque and presented to President John F. Kennedy by US Navy Admiral Hyman Rickover.
Daintre, gone but not forgotten, R.I.P. Angel xx
Tamara
I used to do it for stress relief but not any more. Now I do it simply because I like to and because I'm fairly good at it. I have toned it down a bit since it was becoming way too easy. That may even change soon since I've learned new things about myself. I've pretty much realized I can be whoever I want to be without necessarily dressing the part.
It allows me to create another persona who to be quite frank has no worries and is just there for fun.
I have a mental switch that in some instances I can switch off my insecure self, instructing was one I was always confident and good at that I guess CDing is another mental flick. I don't think it changes me apart from confidence.
That's a really good question Angie, something I ask myself all the time. How much of this is me wanting to BE something and how much is it just escaping reality?
There is definitely an escapist/stress release element to it. There is a measure of role-playing with my feminine side and role-playing to me is partly about escaping the mundane world. It is also partly a learning/growing experience though, and that I take very seriously. It allows me to be a more fuller, functional, loving human being and a lot of my dressing (now) strikes a very deep chord that I sense was always within me but suppressed.
I think it's tougher for guys to express the 'other' side of themselves in our society for a number of reasons. A lot of it is our own fault - we set many of the rules ourselves. So crossdressing is a gateway of sorts for many of us. It's too bad it seems weird to so many people, because it's really just an expression of what is in most of us. Maybe one day it will be an accepted form of expression in a kinder world.
"I dwell in possibility."
"Say what you want and be who you are, because those who matter don't mind, and those who matter don't mind."--Dr. Seuss
"I learned long ago, never to wrestle with a pig. You get dirty, and besides, the pig likes it."
George Bernard Shaw
The problem is that the Cd spectrum is very wide and so people do it for different reasons. But it is nice and neat to be able to say "I do it because...." The trouble is that it isn't as easy to explain as that.
Some feel 'at home' when they do it and others feel liberated or exhilerated or simply sexually excited. If someone doesn't have that Ts thing going on then it often illustrates that they are mentally unsettled and this is the expression of it, whether they dress as a leather cybercop or a girl about town. It's an outward expression of an inner feeling of being unsettled.
Hope that helps.
Doesn't sound so helpful now I read it back but..well
After accepting myself, I realized, that I was more. More than a man. A blend of female and male.
Not knowing how to express who/what I am, I find dressing "lights me up", it lets the real me, shine through.
As my true self shows, stronger, my need to dress, to express myself, may change. But I do like the clothing, so I may just dress, because I like to.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
No offence taken, if you don't as questions you don't (usually) get answers.Originally Posted by wickedblonde GG
Lacking?But i wanted to ask you all, does your c/d make-up for something thats "lacking" in your life ??
Well I guess early on some of it could have been to do with me lacking a girlfriend I suppose - there's not may potential girlfriends around when you study IT/Elec Eng at Uni, the ratio is kinda biased the wrong way.
And early on I guess you could support this theory a bit since I didn't crossdress when I did have a GF.
Good theory isn't it. It's probably wrong though. Alot of my early behaviour regarding CDing was clearly denial, maybe some of it was a GF-replacement but really that's a symptom not a cause. It's something I did in a restricted way early on but which probably would have gone alot further if I had been more confident/known more/<insert other circumstance>.
So I think it was something I was destined to do regardless, as I said once before, I didn't want to be He-Man when I was little, I though She-Ra had the better outfits! If only I'd figured out what this meant sooner
Forgetting troubles, yes, that *does* ring true, it's certainly a very good distraction to get dressed up or even to go shopping for clothes, both have kind of a buzz.troubles you have in your "everyday" life ??
is that similar with some of yourselves ? or is it just like a "hobbie" ??
Somewhere to hide? Well again it's possible that being someone else is part of CDing but maybe not the cause, again just another thing you do as part of getting dressed up, you can't help feeling or acting different.
Hobby - in a very literal sense probably, on the other hand I can personally be more fanatical about CDing than any of my other hobbies and even the computers come second to getting dressed up, so we're well passed "hobby" and heading into "obsession" territory
Hope that helps.
Of course everyone is different so reasons may vary wildly!
For me, it's just something I have to do.
Been doing it since I was 10. The reason why is not really known. Just do.
I certainly had no stress to overcome back then, nor do I now.
To me, that's just a part of being transgendered. There's this urge/need to dress that's comes from deep within, that's simply unexplainable. Something I was born with.
If it were a hobby, I could easily quite as I have other hobbies. Definitely not a hobby.
Can't think of anything lacking in my life that CDing would be a substitute for.
Back when I was 10, didn't even like girls.
Last edited by DonnaT; 03-06-2007 at 12:45 AM.
DonnaT
I can't say why. But there is a gurl inside and now after so many years, I have the courage to let her out to play. So WB this is no Hobbie for me.forgive me for this post, and by no way is it meant to cause "any" offence !!
But i wanted to ask you all, does your c/d make-up for something thats "lacking" in your life ??
is that similar with some of yourselves ? or is it just like a "hobbie" ??
ty all for ur responses
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[SIZE=3]angie [/SIZE]
Well of course I can only speak for myself, but for me the only thing I finding lacking in my life is time to dress. Seriously, I am the kind of person who sits and thinks things through all the time, but I have never been able to pin down anything that makes me dress. I once thought it might be the lack of the love of a good woman, or not havng kids or anything like that, but no, got all those now and the desire/need or whatever you want to call it is stronger than ever. Stress of work? No, the feeling came back hard while I was still off work sick, stress from that? After what I've been through since 2000 I don't allow anything to stress me, I might owe more money than I can see ever paying back, I might be struggling month to month to keep the house and all that, some people would be stressed and that's understandable but my perspective is different. I count myself lucky to be as well as I am, and to be able to keep a roof over our heads and food in our bellies. No stress as such. I dress because I just like to be dressed, it's not a hobby, its expressing the other part of me, the part which perforce needs to be hidden in the male shell most of the time. That's it.
Have faith. I don't mean faith in gods or governments, prophets or pundits. Have faith in yourself, in what you can do and what you know to be right. What you need is inside yourself, you can not find it in a book or the words of another, it may be hardest to find it there but if you look, find it you will!
My Flickr page http://www.flickr.com/photos/mariannaj
It is not a Hobbie! My Hobbie is Drag Racing and I don't mean in heels. As far as an exscape, Yes to an extent. But also to let the real person inside of me come out and be accepted.
Ladies have a GREAT time!
Smile GOD LOVES you!!!
GOD BLESS US ALL!!!
AMY Hepker
ROSES ARE RED
VIOLETS ARE BLUE
I'LL BE ME
AND YOU BE YOU
For me, I had an 'itch' that was not being scratched. My early dressing only consisted of ocassionally wearing some lingerie and sockings/pantyhose. Not until I started dressing fully with wig, make up, etc did the 'itch' finally get scratched. I have not felt the 'itch' since.
[SIZE="4"]Mary Jane[/SIZE]
May those that love us, love us. Those that don't love
us may God turn their hearts. And if he can't turn their
hearts, may he turn their ankles, so we'll know them by their limping.
I see myself as two people...they compliment each other and are both lost on there own. Two 'Selves' may be more accurate for me. Dee needs opportunity to Self-express or the male side suffers agony of withdrawal. I know, I've been through this before. Now I could never leave her- I love her too much. She needs to be Free.
[SIZE=3]She Came From Plant Claire...
Dee[/SIZE][SIZE=3]xxx[/SIZE]
An excellent question! If I were to be perfectly honest, I feel that my early girlie experiences were a temporary escape from an utterly appalling childhood but, having said that, they were a most wonderful and enjoyable experience, too. I don't know exactly what the psychologists would make of this - nor do I particularly care now - but when I was a "temporary" girl I could at least forget the dreadful things that happened to a poor frightened boy. An escape from the hard realities of life - most certainly!
Diane XX
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