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Thread: another question for all of you - TG and SO after SRS

  1. #1
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    another question for all of you - TG and SO after SRS

    both TGs and SOs/GGs.

    How many of you see yourselves together if the TG person were to undergo an actual SRS?


    Louise.

  2. #2
    Platinum Member Sheila's Avatar
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    Louise,
    I may be a lightwight but hormones and SRS are my dealbreakers ......... just got no staying power I guess
    I allow myself to set healthy boundaries ..... to say no to what does not align with my values, to say yes to what does.
    Boundaries assist me to remain healthy, honest and living a life that is true to me

  3. #3
    On a gender safari
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    This would be the ultimate test of 'loving beyond the exterior' wouldn't it?

    I don't think my SO would stay after I had SRS. I doubt I would be able to stay either, because in my case the procedure would mean that I wanted to live exclusively as a heterosexual woman.
    "If we hide who we are for the convenience of others, we 'pass' ourselves up in the process."

  4. #4
    ADMINISTRATOR Sandra's Avatar
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    It wouldn't make any difference to me I would stay support, help Nigella and love her just as much as I do now.
    Last edited by Sandra; 05-04-2007 at 03:38 AM.
    Sandra
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  5. #5
    Silver Member Lilian's Avatar
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    I really would stay and give all the support needed, after all you love the person inside, what they look like outside is only a shell for all the good things inside.
    :hugs

    Be good to everyone on the way up, you never know who you will meet on the way down.

  6. #6
    Junior Member jessie_cal's Avatar
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    My wife said she would be ok with it. But I'm a long ways away from considering SRS. I'll just stick with cd'ing.
    What the world need now is love, sweet love.....

  7. #7
    Love being a girly girl! Country girl's Avatar
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    Nope, nada, no way!

    [SIZE=4]I don't mind the CDing, in fact helping buy clothes, makeup and dressing, etc. is fun for me, but when push comes to shove, at the end of the day, I want a man. So the answer for me is no way. Srs or even wanting to be full time enfemme would definately be the ultimate deal breaker for me. But I do have to say that I applaud all the GG's who are with someone who has or is going through SRS. That is one of the truest forms of unconditional love. CG GG[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4]Country Girl GG [/SIZE]

    [SIZE=3]The tragedy of life is not that it ends so soon, but that we wait so long to begin it."[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=3][/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4]When you find something good... Grab it with both hands and do all you can do to keep it![/SIZE]

  8. #8
    Banned Read only Satrana's Avatar
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    I think this question is also heavilly dependent upon how old you are. If you have already been married a long time and have had kids and are looking forward to retirement then sticking together for the remaioning years with an SO who has SRS is maybe not such a dealbreaker. But if you are young and have a full life to look forward to, including children, then it would be very very hard to stay married - but staying friends maybe possible.

  9. #9
    Junior Member Colleen's Avatar
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    Ive been married to long

    to even think about something like that.And ive been parted out enough with surgery.I like me just the way I am different.
    Happy to be out to my loving wife.

  10. #10
    Super Moderator Raychel's Avatar
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    I am only really in it for the clothes. The whole SRS thing certainly is not for me. But I can tell you for sure that my wife would be gone in a heartbeat if that were to ever come to be. She is only partly tolerant of the CD issue. Underwear is OK with her, but nothing else.
    my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress

    "Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"

  11. #11
    Senior Member Tree GG's Avatar
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    When, where & why?

    Quote Originally Posted by Satrana View Post
    ...If you have already been married a long time and have had kids and are looking forward to retirement then sticking together for the remaioning years with an SO who has SRS is maybe not such a dealbreaker. ....
    Very good point.

    Off the top of my head, no. Sorry, will love you forever but the husband in my heart & head is a man.

    However......if the kids were grown & gone, there was only he & I, retired and no livelihood issues.....maybe.

    If he wanted to continue in a monogamous relationship with me....or if he was looking to become female and attract men.... both would sway the decision.

    My favorite color is plaid so my answer to your question is maybe (which is about 179-1/2 degrees off what I would've said 3 months ago).

  12. #12
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    well its really not an issue for me as I have no desire for SRS etc---I do know one TS who has gone through with it and her wife did stay with her---so far anyway-----another TS I know divorced after she told her spouse---it really depends, not only on the person, but also on the type of relationship they have.
    [SIZE="4"][/SIZE]

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    I met my SO on a dating site. I presented as Josi and after contact of many hours, and phone calls of many more hours we met .. and 3 years later are planning marriage.

    In the early days, as someone never before having to think about CDing, she asked many many questions .. one of which was what I really wanted. Did I want to "be" a woman.

    I said .. I just to be a guy in a dress from time to time and be LIKE a woman and to relate to her and the outrside world as Josi from time to time.

    BUT the majority of the time to be a "regular guy" and be her man.

    She was honest .. and doesnt want a companion .. she wants a FULL relationship.
    Fair enough. Hooray actually!
    So, I think I can answer for her in that if I wanted SRS, she wouldnt have started a relationship and it just wouldnt be what she wanted out of life.
    "The Greatest Thing in all the world
    Is to Love ........ and to Be Loved in return."

  14. #14
    Member susants's Avatar
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    hrt

    we are married 29 years and my so was always ok with me dressing , in the last 10 years i dress a lot more and go out shopping ect she won't come with me and that's ok
    i start hrt 2 years ago can't go full time work as you may know males give payed more not fair
    we have a great relationship more like girlfriends now hrt has it's afects on my sex drive and preforments so she has just met someone and started dating
    i'm very happy she is very happy and by all accounts so is her boyfriend
    susan

  15. #15
    Senior Member Dixie's Avatar
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    [SIZE="3"]I do not want SRS it is too permanent. We did discuss it but we both know that it is not what we want. Tu answer your question I think we would stay together (my wife is Bi) but it would have to be an open relationship, cuz every once and awhile a girl needs something that a man has to offer.[/SIZE]
    [SIZE="2"]"Tell me why I can't where a mini 'kilt' to work?"[/SIZE][SIZE="3"][/SIZE]

  16. #16
    Platinum Member Angie G's Avatar
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    I'm not even going to ask but I think it would be a no deal hun
    Angie

  17. #17
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    ME and my SO discussed it once,kinda joking around and I grabbed my crotch and asked her "do love me here" then I put my hand over her heart and asked "or do you love me here" she was silent for a minute and told me she loved me for the man I am, not the woman I may want to be.But for me SRS is really out of the ?.

  18. #18
    Aspiring Member GACountrygal's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jess(SO) View Post
    Louise,
    I may be a lightwight but hormones and SRS are my dealbreakers ......... just got no staying power I guess
    +1 for me too

  19. #19
    Goddess mylitta's Avatar
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    I'd have to cross that bridge when I came to it. One thing I have learned in my life is never to say never. After all 6 months ago I would have said there is no way I would be in relationship with a CD. You never know what life is going to throw at you, and until it happens, I can't say for sure how I would deal with it.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  20. #20
    Member Paula Thomas's Avatar
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    Louise - I would not ask, nor expect, my wife to accept me that "unconditionally".

    However, since I would not undergo SRS anyway (my wife and I have too much "fun" with what is "south of the border"), perhaps that acts as a bias to my response.

    I would, however, love to have breast augmentation (up to a C cup), and possible other facial surgery (primarily to make my lips more "GG"), and hope that she would stay with me (I have mentioned the breast augmentation before to my wife, and she did not rule it out).

    Frankly, my wife's greatest fear is that I would leave her (fat chance, I have it too easy), so I believe she would accept the breast augmentation and possibly the facial surgery.

    Note - she would like to have breast REDUCTION surgery (from a 34 DD to probably a 34 C), due to back problems probably related to size, so I believe that she would be as accepting to my augmentation as I am accepting of her desire for reduction.

  21. #21
    Administrator Di's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sandra GG View Post
    It wouldn't make any difference to me I would stay support, help Nigella and love her just as much as I do now.
    Great way to put it Sandra....I feel the same way about Sherlyn...I'm in love with the person....and for me I want her to be at peace with her/him self...where ever the journey takes us...we are in it together.
    Last edited by Di; 05-22-2007 at 09:05 PM.
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  22. #22
    what me worry? lindsaycd75's Avatar
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    I would not consider srs for me, even if I lived full time, which I don't plan on. Having said that I don't think my wife would stay if i did, she doesn't like the idea of permanent changes, We also still use those downstairs bits, so she would be rightfully upset if they went bye bye.
    Another one of those nutty Texas T-girls. Save a horse
    drive a truck.

  23. #23
    Member sobe1ove GG's Avatar
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    My answer is no, and he knows this. I love him as the man he is, not the woman. I am straight. I don't want to marry a woman.

    But that's just me!

    Sobe

  24. #24
    That's right, I did it Sharon's Avatar
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    So what those of you who are saying that SRS is a dealbreaker is that a penis is more important to you than love? Or is it the embarrassment you will feel being seen in a relationship with another woman?
    “I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best.”
    Marilyn Monroe

  25. #25
    Member sobe1ove GG's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sharon View Post
    So what those of you who are saying that SRS is a dealbreaker is that a penis is more important to you than love? Or is it the embarrassment you will feel being seen in a relationship with another woman?
    Neither. If he completely changed who he was, then he wouldn't be him, now would he? At least the him that I know. THAT'S why.

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