I was just wondering how many of you girls have actually meet real friends who you hang out and dress together? I have try to make friends in the real world but a lot of them are just interested in having sex even though I always make it clear when ever I chat that I am only looking for friendship. I have a GFwho I love.how many of you girls have ran into this problem? and if you have meet another cd what have been your good experiences and bad experiences.
I have lots of CD/Tgirl friends that I generally met from the clubbing scene here in Atlanta. Got a few that I got to know from the net...but then again when we met it was out at da clubs...well also at the big Tranny convention called SCC. (by the way probably have met 5 or so girls from this forum in person and can call them friends.)
Out of all those friends that really are more casual than anything else I have just a handful of Tgirls that I would call CLOSE friends. Just like most people when picking out friends, those girls are kinda sorta like me. They are still sneaky about being a Tgirl at work and with most their family...however they do like to go out clubbing, shopping, etc enfemme on a regular basis. Not knocking the girls that don't do that..I know some are married, have other issues...but still thats who I get to be very close too and hang out with...Girls with simular circumstances that I got going on.
Last edited by Deidra Cowen; 05-26-2007 at 11:32 AM.
Experience has taught me it's hard to get folks to commit to do things, especially if they are closeted. Holidays are usually bad as they will be spending time with their families. After many disappointments in this respect, I've found it is better for me to go it alone and if I do happen to get together with someone, fine. If not, I always manage to have a good time one way or another.
I have several good CD friends. Most are in California but I am finally coming out of my shell in New York a bit. I think for most cds, there is definitely a fairly high "flake out" factor in getting together for the first time. I have actually been pretty lucky - the vast majority of my friends are both reliable AND conscientious about giving as much notice as possible if a schedule conflict arises.
The people I do meet are girls (and some admirers) whom I have gotten to know pretty well online. This is for two reasons. First, we have had enough discussions so that both parties fully agree that it's going to be a platonic meeting. Second, it's good to know that we are going to have something in common besides being crossdressers. And perhaps these two factors work reciprocally - and result in a better ratio of successful meetings. That is, if the other girl knows that neither of us has any sort of hidden (erotic) agenda, and that we probably have lots to talk about, she's hopefully going to be more enthusiastic about meeting.
Erica
For photos on flickr, my user name is cd_erica_f
As there are no clubs that are less than 40-50 miles away from me here, the opportunity to meet others that CD are few and far in-between.
I have only met one other in person in my area and they came 50 miles just to meet. They were only interested in dressing and chatting, so all went great.
I am on a couple of dating sites though, and most of the people there really only want one thing. And it has nothing with putting clothes on!
I have posted my picture en-femme on them and specified that I am a crossdresser.
When I write them back, if they have chosen to write to me, I always make sure that they understand that I'm a man that wears woman's clothing. And that I just want to have fun, not sex. Even if I did, I'd still have to get to know them a lot better before I'd ever even think about that kind of thing.
One must be careful.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
I guess I'm a lot like EricaCD (whom I've met and had dinner with a couple of times and consider a friend). I invest quite a bit of time in the very beginning, getting to know the other person. It seems to pay off. I have over a dozen friends I see and/or talk to regularly. One onther thing that has helped a lot for me is attending CD/TG events. I've been going to Diva Las Vegas now for awhile and have met girls from litterally all over the world. I've become a big sister to three of them. If you really want to establish friendships, it will take more effort that posting a note on the internet and waiting for the world to beat a path to your door.
Fulltime girl on the inside.
Lipstick=confidence
[SIZE=4]Holly[/SIZE]
I would think that organized group meetings would be the way to go. There's a group here in Boston that meets each week, and they have strict rules about their web site - no sex ads, no naughty pics, etc. It's just people who want to get together with other t-girls and talk and go dancing. I'd look for a similar group in your area. If you're in Van Nuys, I have to assume that there are similar groups within a short drive.
You need to meet people face to face to develop real friendships. If you join a support group you increase the chances that you will meet people that have similar interests which could lead to a friendship. In a support group you have a regular opportunity to get to know someone a bit better. Real friendships take time to develop. I have quite a number of CD's that I consider as friends. A more select group of CD's are those that I consider close friends that I often get together with for things that have nothing to do with crossdressing. I met all of my closest friends through my involvement with my support group.
Phoebe
All of my experiences with other CD's have been pleasant and none of them want to have sex.I knew a few CD's like 25 years ago that were into sex but I didn't mix it up with them very much because I was about 26-27 years old and this group of people were just barely out of high school.I like shopping and the whole itinerary of crossdressers stuff.One of these years I would like to go one of those CD conventions or maybe even an M to F fashion show. I just let the person know what my interests and limitations are and so far there hasn't been any problem.In particular,I've made a lot of CD freinds on this forum
Funny you should ask this question. Just this past friday i took a roadtrip to meet another CD for just the very same thing to dress with and talk and just hang out as girls together I had such a wonderful time i'll be going back alot in the future.
So far my only experience has been positive i'm really looking forward to becoming good if not best friends with her. She was looking for someone to just hang out with also no sex just two girls with the same interests. They are out there if you look hard enough if you were closer to me i'd be your dressing companion and girl friend to just hang with and talk clothes or what ever might come up.
ttfn
Hugs and kisses Brenda
I know what you mean. Curiosity just made me look into one of those "friend finder groups" that shall remain nameless. I think the first question in the profile set up is sexual orientation.Originally Posted by kathly
Dear girl, listen to your granny. I don't know where you live but seek out a crossdressing group like Tris-Ess or I happen to know about Tiffany's here in new england. There is safety in numbers and maybe this woulod give you an opportunity to make better choices.
Rita B from New England
Last edited by Rita B; 05-26-2007 at 02:32 PM. Reason: spelling
Have a few friends locally... dressed a few times and it doesn't do anything for me.... Meet for lunch with a few, in drab.... I can get out at odd times vs everyone else but I'm just as happy out enfemme solo as with someone else.... Guess it's just me....
Love Karren
Yes, I agree it is very hard to find a local cd who just wants to hang out together. For me nothing wrong with the sex part but it comes and goes. I would truly like to meet a local that seeks friendship and just doing things together besides the sex. Danielle
Back when I lived in the city (Chicago) and was actively going out to bars and participating in support groups, I had 3 friends (2 CD's and 1 TS) who I got together with on a regular basis, including at each others homes. We'd go out together too.
I had lots of other friends who I only saw in clubs or at community things. Many people are very closeted to the point that they won't associate with other CD's or TS's exept in "safe" situations, and their home isn't one of those places.
In recent times, I've occasionally gone to meetings of another local group, and it seems like everyone just wants to go to bars and hang out, no one seems to want to make friends outside of that, not sure why that is. I'm not fond of hanging around in bars any more, and would like to have friends that I can do regular stuff with, visit at their place and have them visit me in my home, dressed up or not, but it seems to be very difficult to find others wanting that, at least for me.
Carol
My name is Carol.
I have. In fact I have met in person with three girls from this forum and all three were terrific ladies! :-)
Kim
Same thing here... have a hard time meeting "girls" who are on the same page - I know they're out there... BTW, I'm also in Atlanta (And Dierdra, you look great)! I know a few girls who are on the up and up, but most I "meet" on line are not... and I have seen many in the local clubs that I feel only contribute to the negative stereotype that we face.... it can be really frustrating at times....
I have only met one other C/D'er in person. I am a non-smoker and she was a chain smoker. I felt I was going to suffocate before I left. She was nice but I couldn't get around the heavy smoke environment. I guess she was nervous because she was lighting up one cigarette after another. I partially stipped in my car on the way home to try to escape the lingering smell. Not the experience I was looking forward to.
one or two developing relationships. difficult because my lifestyle means that my dressing time is very limited and often they lead busy lifestyles too. love to meet a friend who just wants to go girlie shopping and dress up together - not interested in having sex with them!
mitch
to meet with several other CDers/TGs in our area. we are looking forward to meeting Erica CD in the near future. we have what I would consider a close reltionship with roberta from here IRL. it is so wonderful to find other likeminded people wo connect with! Anyone in the By area welcome to contact us, we love to get out!
Louise.
i am a cd and love it.but were i live its hard to find friends here to.all people want to do is look down on you and judge you for what you are.thats ok for them.i would love to meet other cds here just to be friends with and enjoy life as it comes.one day i will meet someone close by to spend the day with to have fun and enjoy each others company.
Since I am fairly new to the realization and acceptance of being a crossdresser, I have not taken the time to actively try and meet others. This forum is the main extent at this time. There are a couple of CD/TS that live just a few miles away (found them on http://cross-dressing.vickyf.com/ind...pe=State&id=64) but have not tried to contact them yet. Would love to meet others and talk & share ideas & comfortable times.
Barbara
Let it Blossom - Let it grow
There is always that undercurrent of sex when you go out with a larger group of T-girls. It's just part of the package. You just have to keep it clear that you are not interested and it helps if the club or group specifically bans that kind of activity.
You really should be able to search for and find some kind of social group or counseling group that get together. And as some of the other girls have mentioned, most "regulars" on here seem to be pretty nice people. I have met 3 or 4 and we've always had a good time and enjoyed each others company. (Can't wait for you to make it back to New England - Kim!).
Sally
Its not really something I am interested in doing meeting othere I guess I just dont see the point. I dont want to go out dressed and meting someone dressed when I was not would just seem not right
I agree with a lot of you girls that you have to talk with a person for a while before meeting and that is exactly what I have done and that is when I usually find out that the person is interested in something else rather than frienship. The reason i would like to have cd friends is that no one knows except for one person knows about it and is something that talking about to someone helps a lot.
Honey if ya wanna chat just contact me on Yahoo when I am around I am about 50 50 dressed some days I just cannot be bothered but I work away a lot
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