I am accepting...as long as you are like me!

[Hippy Chic's Chick]

That is exactly the point that every GG has been trying to make. We aren't "gay bashing", we are trying to point out that it is unacceptable to do this whilst in a relationship.

And as for "cheater bashing" (yes I've just made up my own name for it) then I'm sorry for anyone I offened but I'll be the first to make my feelings known and remember where I left that 3x2...

But that goes for anyone, be them gay, straight, bi, CD, TG, TS or anything else you care to think of. If you can't be faithful to one person you shouldn't be in the relationship.

Yuperoonie - you tell 'em.

Put it this way - I divorced for my ex's adultery (and I bloody well made sure that was the stated reason too), I'd never consider leaving someone over a pair of knickers (and bras and basques and nighties and make-up and...).

I can only imagine how many women must feel and I'll bet the stereotypical crossdresser must come to mind. Therefore, he's going to be gay and going to want to go off with another man.

This forum is about offering support to GGs and family members of CDs and perpetuating that myth helps nobody at all, especially not the majority of CDers who are good, decent, honest people. In fact, that's what it seems many GGs like about our CDers, that they're a darn site more open and honest than most men out there.

I suggest a sticky at the top of the forum aimed at wives/girlfriends to discuss their straight, faithful CD partners to ensure that this message is seen and heard regardless of whoever posts about proud they are that they can use CDing as a valid reason to cheat.

[Dee Talbot]

So, here is what I find really amusing. I consider myself to be bisexual!!!!!! But because I prefer not to read stories of people glorifying their infidelity, nor to have them available to scare off other GG's, I am gay bashing!!!!! Whatever!!!!

I accept everyone. I just wish a little of that acceptance could get thrown my way!

Dee

[Toyah]

Bashing? Thats way over stating what goes on here. I have said it before and will again. This is a very friendly calm little place on the net with not much trolling & flaming.

That being said I would be less than honest if I did not say I too notice the funny little comments that some make like Ick!! or EWWW!! on the gay or bi threads. It did get on my nerves just a little but I have always just ignored those comments and moved on. By the way people that make those comments are revealing some discomfort or even doubt about their own sexuality is my opinion.

I do think that for some reason the GAY and BI girls tend to be the ones generating the more risque threads. This really is not a sex hookup site, nor a place for sex stories and all that. So dispite being BI I too sometimes get irratated at those threads where someone is trying to push the envelope a bit.

I fully admit and confess that I have slipped a time or two and posted in those sex threads....usually when in a playful lighthearted mood...and just wanting to be silly.

Oh yeah...I am proud to be in da Panty Police!!! Had fun with those threads when they were jumping up on the board every day. I thought it was all good fun...but then again I probably offended some. Hmmm guess I obviously am not perfect nor above being judgemental myself!

Hunny you don't even come close to the closed minded asses here that are the panty police they know who they are, always judgmental always negative unless its their own view of what is right. I wont name names but they are a cancer in our midst so narrow minded and so influential it hurts

[Ema1234 GG]

I suggest a sticky at the top of the forum aimed at wives/girlfriends to discuss their straight, faithful CD partners to ensure that this message is seen and heard regardless of whoever posts about proud they are that they can use CDing as a valid reason to cheat.

A very good idea!

I accept everyone. I just wish a little of that acceptance could get thrown my way!

I think a lot of GG's on here will echo that sentiment, I know I certainly do.

[Lora Olivia]

so a married couple who mutually chooses to have an open relationship(sex with other people) are just plain wrong?? whats up with this...its nobody's business but theirs...now what is wrong is if it is not mutually agreed upon...that is cheating....my best friend (his) wife has said that she wishes for me to be fulfilled as a woman, she loves us both and wants us both to be happy

[Hippy Chic's Chick]

so a married couple who mutually chooses to have an open relationship(sex with other people) are just plain wrong?? whats up with this...its nobody's business but theirs...now what is wrong is if it is not mutually agreed upon...that is cheating....my best friend (his) wife has said that she wishes for me to be fulfilled as a woman, she loves us both and wants us both to be happy

That's a choice you make in your relationship and that's fine.

The issue here is that a CDer bragged about waiting until his wife was out of town to do the dirty on her.

It's not comparable to your situation.

[PatriciaCD]

I dont usually post but i feel i must this time. I think this thread has gotten way off track. lets just keep it to the original topic. WHY WOULD SOMEONE WHO IS NOT ACCEPTED IN MAINSTREAM SOCIETY WANT TO PUT DOWN SOMEONE ELSE THAT IS NOT ACCEPTED IN MAINSTREAM SOCIETY? That makes us no different that those thast put us down. So how can we expect to be accepted if we cant accept each other?????

[Ema1234 GG]

Here we go again. No one has ever mentioned open relationships being wrong. But then again, that's people not fully reading someone elses post and then jumping to conclusions.

How on earth has anyone been talking about open relationships when words like "cheating" and "unfaithful" are being used. If all parties know fully what is going on and are consenting then there is nothing wrong with it, afterall it's their own private lives.

But it's when it's done behind one partners back that it becomes unacceptable.

[Kieron Andrew]

so a married couple who mutually chooses to have an open relationship(sex with other people) are just plain wrong?? whats up with this...its nobody's business but theirs...now what is wrong is if it is not mutually agreed upon...that is cheating....my best friend (his) wife has said that she wishes for me to be fulfilled as a woman, she loves us both and wants us both to be happy

the issue isn't open relationships whereby the spouse knows the CD is going to go with a man...open agreed upon relationships seem perfectly responsible to me, in fact ive been in one myself, its when the CD intends to deceive the SO and do the nasty with a men behind her back the minute its turned and have no intention of discussing it with her

[Dee Talbot]

so a married couple who mutually chooses to have an open relationship(sex with other people) are just plain wrong?? whats up with this...its nobody's business but theirs...now what is wrong is if it is not mutually agreed upon...that is cheating....my best friend (his) wife has said that she wishes for me to be fulfilled as a woman, she loves us both and wants us both to be happy

No, but anyone who waits until their SO is unavailable, out of town, or unaware to engage in sexual behavior with another person, contrary to vows or committment they have made with that other person is in the wrong. What 2 people choose to do in the privacy of their relationship is no one elses business. As a wife, I have exchanged vows with my husband to be faithful to each other. I have a reasonable expectation that these vows will be kept. If my SO then dresses, feels like a different person - a woman- and indulges in sexual activity with another man or woman, then he has broken his vows and I have every right to be upset. Same thing goes if he does it in trousers. No one is saying that people cannot practice whatever sexual activity they want. But if you have committed to be faithful to anohter person, then be faithful. It is only if one is in an "open relationship" and has released their SO from that portion of their vows that sexual relations outside the relationship is acceptable.


Dee

[Hippy Chic's Chick]

I dont usually post but i feel i must this time. I think this thread has gotten way off track. lets just keep it to the original topic. WHY WOULD SOMEONE WHO IS NOT ACCEPTED IN MAINSTREAM SOCIETY WANT TO PUT DOWN SOMEONE ELSE THAT IS NOT ACCEPTED IN MAINSTREAM SOCIETY? That makes us no different that those thast put us down. So how can we expect to be accepted if we cant accept each other?????

That didn't happen - that would be much too simple.

There was a thread in which CDs were talking about sleeping with other men. Some CDs said, "Eww" or "Icky" about their thoughts regarding this.

GGs got the blame - cuz like it's obvious right, that if GGs are with a CD, we must hate the idea of sex with a man? Or summat.

And then this thread was started on the back of the one it occured on, in which the only time GGs had something to say was when a member boasted about being unfaithful to his wife - no GG brought the sex of either party into the equation, simply the unfaithfulness that occured.


See - easy peasy.

[Ema1234 GG]

its when the CD intends to deceive the SO and do the nasty with a men behind her back the minute its turned and have no intention of discussing it with her

Yup, that's exactly the problem!

If they really need to explore their sexuality then they shouldn't be in a relationship, and if they already are and they honestly can't surpress these thoughts and desires they should be a man and end it before they hurt their SO even more.

That didn't happen - that would be much too simple.

There was a thread in which CDs were talking about sleeping with other men. Some CDs said, "Eww" or "Icky" about their thoughts regarding this.

GGs got the blame - cuz like it's obvious right, that if GGs are with a CD, we must hate the idea of sex with a man? Or summat.

And then this thread was started on the back of the one it occured on, in which the only time GGs had something to say was when a member boasted about being unfaithful to his wife - no GG brought the sex of either party into the equation, simply the unfaithfulness that occured.


See - easy peasy.

Hippy Chick's Chick... A master of saying it like it is!

[Kieron Andrew]

and if they already are and they honestly can't surpress these thoughts and desires they should be a man and end it before they hurt their SO even more.

or if thats the case, discuss it openly with the SO, rather than keeping it from them, there are SO's out there that will agree to an open relationship, or the chance for their spouse to explore their sexuality....if they dont agree to it then drop the idea or get the hell out the relationship before you even think of doing it anyway behind the SO's back

[Ema1234 GG]

there are SO's out there that will agree to an open relationship, or the chance for their spouse to explore their sexuality....

Very good point actually that I'd not thought about, no doubt because personally I couldn't agree to an open relationship.

I suffer from the green eyed monster far too much. But that would be regardless of whether he wanted to sleep with other women or other men, I just couldn't hack it!

[Dee Talbot]

or if thats the case, discuss it openly with the SO, rather than keeping it from them

Exactly. Give me the opportunity to accept or decline. If we are in a relationship, then let me at least have the option to say go for it or not for me.

And really, this argument is exactly the same one I used when I found my Barb's stash of clothing. Give me the choice to be part of your dressing or not. If two people love one another, they owe each other the dignity of communication.

Dee

[Lora Olivia]

Oh my, I think I have managed to misconvey my feeling here...i agree that any sexual relationship behind the back of you SO is totally wrong whether it be homo or hetero my apologies to any who I may have offended

[AmandaM]

I hate you all! I hate you all!

LOL! Just kidding!

Remember, Mills, or is that Miller, the father of American Liberalism, dreamt of a day when all would have a place at the table. So, Gays, Baptists, Martians, we all get our say. But Please! Let's be kind to each other. The world sucks. And many in the world hate us. Let's try and remember that...

[SatinDoll00]

WHY WOULD SOMEONE WHO IS NOT ACCEPTED IN MAINSTREAM SOCIETY WANT TO PUT DOWN SOMEONE ELSE THAT IS NOT ACCEPTED IN MAINSTREAM SOCIETY? That makes us no different that those thast put us down. So how can we expect to be accepted if we cant accept each other?????

My original point exactly.

Where in my original post did I condone or promote anyone having extramarital affairs???!!!

Why is it that when someone stands up for the rights of a CD to find another man attractive that people assume that means in the context of wedlock?

You know, I am sorry I posted this thread...but it does show what the attitudes of many here are.

I will refrain from posting anything else concerning men or homosexuality or bisexuality here.

Congratulations. Those of you that sought to censor and oppress those of us that identify with that sexual orientation have successfully managed to do so.

Morgan

[Alex!]

I'm not sure. Sometimes I prefer tater-tots from french fries. Or potato chips. It's a mood thing.



I figured since this thread is venturing off track, I would step on the accelerator a bit for extra fun.

[SatinDoll00]

Hey...seriously

I apologize to anyone offended. It was not my original intent.

To the GGs/SOs. You have every right to be pissed when your partner cheats on you. I have been there and it sucks. That is one of the reasons why I originally said "I can understand it when the GGs/SOs do it..."

To the CDs that find the issue "icky". You have every right to your opinions. The only issue I have is that using negative terms like that tend to demean others. It is a forum for opinions. You have every right to speak yours as well.

WendyMe...no, I do not want, nor have I suggested, that those that post such opinions be silenced. You can close this thread...it won't matter much.

Tamara...I do not recall directly involving you...you seem upset. I am sorry if I offended you.

To everyone else...my original intent was to unify...not divide. I guess this is an old debate?? I have not been party to it before, so I did not know that it was old issue that had been settled.

You all are entitled to your opinions...as am I. A forum like this is majority rules. Perhaps my "BS" post is not popular. I was only speaking from my heart. My opinions are mine and mine alone. As I stated above...I have learned from this. This forum does not seem the place to post about bi or homosexual desires. I will not do so again. There are many other topics to discuss concerning CDing that will be less offensive to those sensative to the subject.

I like this forum, I feel as though I have met several kindred spirits here. Unfortunately, I am in the learning curve period. I posted a panty pic, that got removed...MY OWN FAULT. I did not read the rules of the forum. I know now what is acceptable and what is not. I will keep my opinions concerning this subject out of these posts...like many have indicated that they would prefer.

As far as I am concerned, the issue is closed. Anyone that wants to continue to attack me for this...please go ahead...I do not mind. We are all different, and I understand that my ideas are not necessarily shared by all those here.

I really do not want to leave the forum. I posted that in anger. If the admins want me gone, they can do that...it is their job to make sure that everyone here is happy. Apparently I made some people unhappy with this post. Oh well...not much I can do about it now.

I can agree to disagree.

Morgan

[AmandaM]

OK! Whaaaat, have you got....against french fries?

I'm not sure. Sometimes I prefer tater-tots from french fries. Or potato chips. It's a mood thing.

I figured since this thread is venturing off track, I would step on the accelerator a bit for extra fun.

[KewTnCurvy GG]

I have noticed that there is a certain degree of intolerance here on this board.

Morgan

AMEN SISTER!
WHAT SHE SAID AND DOUBLE!!
KEW

[BarbaraTalbot]

OK! Whaaaat, have you got....against french fries?

I mean they are obviously meant to be suggestive.

back on track:

my first post was originally entirely in support of the original post. I only edited it when it seemed that being "accepting" was suddenly interpreted by others (not the o.p.) as meaning that only those who are less than enthusiastic about explicit meanderings of mind need to just be glad for the assault on the senses or close their eyes.

further back to the original post that spawned this thread:
It had EXPLICIT description of what it is that this person (who had 2 posts at that point) had decided to do with a stranger in a car and stated that she felt free to do this because the SO was out of town. I realize now that the since edited version seems pretty tame. Now it just says hey, My SO left town and I had my first experience with a man. If they had posted just that, It wouldn't have been any different than many other posts, I might (but probably not) mention that cheating is an issue.

It was the fact that a new person who most likely had found an eager-to-hear-it-audience on a forum designed for explicit discussions previously, took one look at our threads and our posts and said, hey here is another place it has crossdresser in the title so it must be a place where such explicit discussion is appropriate.

[SatinDoll00]

Barbara...

I guess this is a messy area. I was not advocating that anyone go outside their relationship, whatever that may be, to find sexual happiness.

It seems the line gets blurry for some, on both sides of the issue. By posting that a man (CD or not) as the right to find another man attractive, somehow I have been misunderstood as saying that having sex outside of commited relation is okay. I did not, nor would I.

There is temptation all around us. If we choose to succumb to that temptation, it matters not what our sexual orientation is...only that we have chosen to commit an act of betrayal.

My original post was not really about the attack on the person that cheated on his wife or SO, it was about the use of language to describe the feeling that someone gets in reading about another's sexual preference.

I know now that my words were wasted and my meaning was lost.

Please, accept my sincere apology if I offended you. It was never my intent.

Morgan

[BarbaraTalbot]

Barbara...

I guess this is a messy area. I was not advocating that anyone go outside their relationship, whatever that may be, to find sexual happiness.

It seems the line gets blurry for some, on both sides of the issue. By posting that a man (CD or not) as the right to find another man attractive, somehow I have been misunderstood as saying that having sex outside of commited relation is okay. I did not, nor would I.

There is temptation all around us. If we choose to succumb to that temptation, it matters not what our sexual orientation is...only that we have chosen to commit an act of betrayal.

My original post was not really about the attack on the person that cheated on his wife or SO, it was about the use of language to describe the feeling that someone gets in reading about another's sexual preference.

I know now that my words were wasted and my meaning was lost.

Please, accept my sincere apology if I offended you. It was never my intent.

Morgan

nope you didnt offend me at all that is why I agreed with your original post. I meant it when I said it is easy for me to see when I am offended but not why something I believe might offend others. I am sure we can all work on that.

For example, I have frequently stated my relief at finding out that being a CD doesn't mean I am gay. It wouldn't have occurred to me that my relief at that is also the opposite for someone who has same sex attraction (and are wondering where it "came" from) and decide that gender issues played a role.

I just think a little sensitivity all the way around with a focus more on the actual activity of crossdressing is where we have more common ground.