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Thread: headlessness?!

  1. #1
    Member occdresser's Avatar
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    headlessness?!

    I dont understand why some of the ladies on this forum would go through getting all dressed up, take a digital picture, and send it here, and not show their face. What do you have to lose? besides-it is so hard to recognize someone here even if it were your neighbor

  2. #2
    Toyah Toyah's Avatar
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    I think you will find it either comfort factor or that the person does not feel comfortable with their makeup skills

  3. #3
    Junior Member Jezebel's Avatar
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    I think my favorite part is seeing the ladies in full makeup I love that!
    I haven't seen all that many people with their heads chopped off though, so I just haven't had the problem.

  4. #4
    Aspiring Member BarbaraTalbot's Avatar
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    Atributable to fear of public exposure.

    I do show my face and have even shown on occasion my male side. In the forum its arguably safer in the members only picture area. I never anticipated posting public pictures initially, I just did once intending to take them right down, but it felt so validating to see them that I left them. I now really look foward to posting them.

    My Blog is probably more dangerous than the forum. Even though I set my settings so it isn't searchable or on a regular rotation with Blogspot, thanks to web crawlers and Google it may as well be.

    I have had well over 3,000 visitors, dunno who they are, most don't leave even an anonymous note. The only info I get is maybe (75% of the time) where they clicked from to get there and maybe the city or state or country. Those far away frm anyone I actually know bother me not at all. SInce I live in a city of 4,000,000 people, it shouldnt bother me when inevitably one is from my metro area. What are the odds the know me.

    I get their weirdest hits sometimes. People searching for slingbacks, people searching for random names I mention. My favorite recently was someone from nasa.gov Googled "women's wingtips" and got me. weird world.

    My theory now is add to the chaos. The more information and pictures out there, the more there is for someone to sort through to make any sense of it. If someone wanted to read the 50,000 to 100,000 words I have typed here and in my blog the last 3 months, they could sieve the information down to one and only one person, me. But who would and why would they do that?

    I have thought of doing some headless shots lately though because sometimes its about the clothes. I have a closet full, and no time when my photographer/make-up artist/wife/lover/babysitter is able to help me at a time that I am not working/sleeping/babysitting/cleaning/cooking. I have probably 20 to 25 pairs of shoes that I have never seen a picture of to see how they look on.
    Vincent Vega: Well, I confess that I wait to talk, but I am trying to learn to listen. (paraphrased)

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  5. #5
    Platinum Member Shelly Preston's Avatar
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    Well for some its just not worth the risk

    It may be a one in a million chance of getting recognised

    Think what the consequences could be

    loss of marriage or partner

    loss of Children (maybe)

    loss of Job

    Even exposure in a newspaper depending on who they are


    All of which could pretty much leave them a wreck so I never condem anyone for not showing their face
    Shelly

    Super Moderator....How to tell your partner......Abbreviations

  6. #6
    Resident Polymath MarinaTwelve200's Avatar
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    The HEAD is the most important part, as far as I am concerned. Fortunately, In a wig and makeup, I look nothing like my male self, so I dont fear recognition.

  7. #7
    SMILEING WITH RED LIPS JULIE33362's Avatar
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    TO EACH HIS OR IN THIS CASE HER OWN LITTLE AT A TIME THANK GOODNS WE HAVE EACH OTHER HERE BABY STEPS :be:
    WEAR SOMETHING PRETTY

  8. #8
    Worlds Prettiest Dad!!! Jocelyn Quivers's Avatar
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    Being one of those ladies, that goes through all of the effort and trouble to get dolled up but then only show a picture from the neck down I'll explain.

    Some of us are in positions, jobs, areas of the country etc where cross dressing can get you fired or have a negative effect on your career. Ex.#1 You are a high school principal, school system superintendant, teacher, coach etc. Would you risk the possibility of getting outted by showing your face, and possibly being recoginzed by another teacher or any school staff, who then anonymously copies and pastes your picture for the whole entire school to recognize.

    Ex.#2 You are a judge, police officer, firefighter, prosecuter, in the military etc. Again do you want to take the same risk. Also what effect could it have on your ability to do the job.

    Ex. 3 You are preacher, religous leader, etc. In a very conservative part of the country. Do you want to take the risk of your congregation finding out.
    I am not in any of the above listed proffessions, however where I do work I know my employer would not approve of me doing this if they found out.

    Do not get me wrong, I understand everyone takes risk and in basicaly most proffessions being found out that you are a crossdresser could possibly have a negative effect on your career. I respect and look up to those of you who have the courage to show your faces. I am slowly getting to the point where I am ready to show mine.

    So for the time being all I am comfortable with doing is showing me from the neck down. Hope this helps to explain a little. Jocelyn

  9. #9
    Administrator Di's Avatar
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    Although I understand ( I think) the why. I just Hate HATE SEEING them......Just my first instinct is yuck!! Then I think....might as well be a pic of clothes on a hanger or mannequin. Just my pet peeve.
    Last edited by Di; 09-24-2007 at 12:08 PM.
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  10. #10
    a guy in a skirt KimberlyS's Avatar
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    Originally for me putting a picture up, then putting it up with face blurred out was out of fear of being known. Now I know who is going to recognize me dressed with wig and makeup on and with just a picture and no reference. So for a while I did have a few pictures up.

    Then my wife found out and she is not comfortable having them up. So I am back to faceless pictures when I put them up. If it makes her happy. And besides the pluses I get out of her being happy far out way my want for pictures being up.

    I liked the blurred face over the headless ones.
    KimberlyS-CD
    joe in a skirt. Being myself not trying to be some other CDer
    Just trying to find a balance for my son and myself.

    Standard disclaimer: Going out of the house was right for me, it may or may not be right for you. If you've got no desire to leave the house, that's fine, I'm not trying to push you out the door. But for those who've been yearning to do so, I just want to let you know the world may not be as scary a place as you think.

  11. #11
    Feeling Good today AmberTG's Avatar
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    I think my siblings would recognise me even with the wig and makeup, I look too much like my sister in my current avatar picture. If, on that million to one chance, they actually see my pic and recognise me, oh well, stuff happens, they'll just have yet another reason not to talk to me!
    "I see your true colors shining through, your true colors, and that's why I love you,
    so don't be afraid to let them show, your true colors, true colors are beautiful, like a rainbow"

    "Without change,something sleeps deep inside us, and seldom awakens. The sleeper must awaken!"[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  12. #12
    Dejavu Marianna Julianna's Avatar
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    I used to keep my face hidden, but then I had a beard which did not fit the feminine image, now I no longer have the beard I am happy to show my face. It seems I have been recognised as my male self from my female photos though (well possibly, never was more than a suggestion) although that's another longer story than I would go into here.
    Have faith. I don't mean faith in gods or governments, prophets or pundits. Have faith in yourself, in what you can do and what you know to be right. What you need is inside yourself, you can not find it in a book or the words of another, it may be hardest to find it there but if you look, find it you will!

    My Flickr page http://www.flickr.com/photos/mariannaj

  13. #13
    Woman at heart Veronica 1's Avatar
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    I have no problems with showing my face on this site. On the one in a million chance that someone who knows me could recognize me I feel quite safe about it. Even if it happened, so what? My job is not so critical whereas I would be fired for wearing dresses, it would only lead to ridicule and laughter but I can put up with that. It is my life and I will live it in the manner that I want to.
    Sister will you…
    Make believe…
    Play dress up…
    Let me be the Princess…
    Tell me stories in the dark…
    Always be my friend?

  14. #14
    Mrs Peel, We're needed jennifer41356's Avatar
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    I have to agree with OCC, why would anyone come searching at a crossdresser web site looking for a judge or a preacher. etc...unless they already knew...If the happened to stumble on your pic here and actually recognized..the first question would be to them" why are you even here"'..they must be into CD gals or something..

    a few years ago a friend who doesnt know my fem side was at my place and saw a pic of me as Jennifer and asked who she was. I said oh its an friend and that was that, so take it for what its worth, i think the odds of being struck by lightning are better than being out here

    Jennifer

  15. #15
    Member Sedona's Avatar
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    I don't show my face for a couple of reasons. First off, I think I can look waaaay more sexy and girly showing just my bod, even though it's built more like Chyna than Paris. And, while I think my makeup skills are pretty good, when I look at pix of myself, to me, I don't look feminine in the least (well, a little bit). My jaw is really square, and my features are very "guy."

    If I do my outfit just so, and take good pictures, I can sometimes pull off GG, but with the face, nah. But, I'll do an occasional closeup of lips, eyes, etc. . .

    For me, dressing is an at home activity, I'm not concerned with going out and passing. My 6'3" and 190+# pretty much assures that.

    And, there's that recognition thing. I'm not famous or anything, but in my community, I'm reasonably well-known, and wouldn't want any professional stress. My girlfriend appreciates this as well.

    I may lessen as time goes by, but that's where I stand now.
    -Sedona

  16. #16
    Wants red cocktail dress! nikki_t's Avatar
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    I happen to like my avatar pic which I took with self timer and didn't quite get the pic framed correctly (ooops). But here I am in all my glory (get your barf bagready!) just in case anyone was wondering.


  17. #17
    Blushing June '07 Bride Sheri 4242's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by occdresser View Post
    I dont understand why some of the ladies on this forum would go through getting all dressed up, take a digital picture, and send it here, and not show their face. What do you have to lose? besides-it is so hard to recognize someone here even if it were your neighbor
    I agree that it would be very difficult to rcognize someone who is in full makeup and wig. I seriously doubt anybody who knows me only drab, would ever rocognize me en femme. Oh, somebody who knew me well-enough "might" see some sort of resemblance, but IMHO it is a very low percentage thing.

    That said, some just are not comfortable going that far, yet. Maybe they will get there, maybe they won't.

    Quote Originally Posted by Toyah View Post
    I think you will find it either comfort factor or that the person does not feel comfortable with their makeup skills
    Toyah is correct about another side of this issue. Some have noted on here from time-to-time, that they aren't that comfortable or proficient in doing their makeup and/or hair styling.

    Quote Originally Posted by Marina Twelve View Post
    The HEAD is the most important part, as far as I am concerned. Fortunately, In a wig and makeup, I look nothing like my male self, so I dont fear recognition.
    I agree with Marina that the head -- or more importantly, the face -- is the most important part of the photo -- the window to the soul is in one's eyes -- and the window to their personality is in their smile. (BTW, those who might be reluctant to post b/c they aren't as proficient as they want in re makeup and hair styling, I know several of us have spent a goodly amount of time PMing anyone who has ever asked for advice.)

    Quote Originally Posted by JocelynQuivers View Post
    Some of us are in positions, jobs, areas of the country etc where cross dressing can get you fired or have a negative effect on your career. Ex.#1 You are a high school principal, school system superintendant, teacher, coach etc. Would you risk the possibility of getting outted by showing your face, and possibly being recoginzed by another teacher or any school staff, who then anonymously copies and pastes your picture for the whole entire school to recognize.
    Ex.#2 You are a judge, police officer, firefighter, prosecuter, in the military etc. Again do you want to take the same risk. Also what effect could it have on your ability to do the job.
    Ex. 3 You are preacher, religous leader, etc. In a very conservative part of the country. Do you want to take the risk of your congregation finding out.
    Jocelyn makes a good point, too -- but I have been in TWO of the positions she has noted and I live in a small, conservative city with MAJOR "small-time thinking." Nevertheless, I feel posting my picture here is a very low-odds risk. A person would have to come to this site -- then find a post of mine -- then recognize me. The last one is where I feel most secure b/c when I have been out en femme -- even on Halloween in the neighborhood -- neighbors who have known me for years and years have not recognized it was me. (That's one great reason to get the proper makeup and practice, practice, practice -- our GG's have been doing this since most were little girls. You just can't slap it on and expect it to look good -- and with the blue beard hue many of us have, you've got to add concealor and red lipstick first. Until you are proficient, plan on makeup taking two hours. When you are proficient, think an hour.)
    [SIZE="4"]Sheri[/SIZE]

  18. #18
    Hugging the Kurves! RobertaFermina's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=nikki_t;1019948]I happen to like my avatar pic which I took with self timer and didn't quite get the pic framed correctly (ooops). But here I am in all my glory (get your barf bagready!) just in case anyone was wondering.

    Dear,

    You look lovely! Your upper lip has wonderful curves, and those smouldering eyes are hot... Your face has all the potential that a professional makeover would make into a real beauty. Try one, and take notes on what they do, and come out from behind those face-hiding tresses....then you'll be pasting your face all over the forum !


    By the Way......Nobody has a head that would look as lovely as your legs ! Oh My...they are a Wonder !


    Roberta
    [COLOR=Red]Open your Heart :

  19. #19
    Swans have more fun! sandra-leigh's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sheri 4242 View Post
    I agree that it would be very difficult to rcognize someone who is in full makeup and wig. I seriously doubt anybody who knows me only drab, would ever rocognize me en femme. Oh, somebody who knew me well-enough "might" see some sort of resemblance, but IMHO it is a very low percentage thing.
    I, on the other hand, get recognized fairly readily even when I am in full makeup and wig. Seriously, the first couple of times I went Out fully dressed, people that had seen me a small number of times in bad light, came over and said hello, having quickly picked me out and figured out where they knew me from.

    If someone were to do a profile shot of my face, then my mother might get questions about why her picture was there! Scary resemblence! I think that (dressed) I may look more like my mother than my sister does!

    It's just one of those things; some of the gals at our club look like totally different people when dressed; I seem to be more in the "I know you!" side of the spectrum. It isn't that I have some huge nose or a thick unibrow or a blazing tatoo. Just one of those genetic things.

  20. #20
    That Cute New Member KendallM2F86's Avatar
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    Soon my pics will be on here once i get them goin, i can't wait to share
    ~*Kendall*~

  21. #21
    Wants red cocktail dress! nikki_t's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=RobertaFermina;1020303]
    Quote Originally Posted by nikki_t View Post
    I happen to like my avatar pic which I took with self timer and didn't quite get the pic framed correctly (ooops). But here I am in all my glory (get your barf bagready!) just in case anyone was wondering.

    Dear,

    You look lovely! Your upper lip has wonderful curves, and those smouldering eyes are hot... Your face has all the potential that a professional makeover would make into a real beauty. Try one, and take notes on what they do, and come out from behind those face-hiding tresses....then you'll be pasting your face all over the forum !


    By the Way......Nobody has a head that would look as lovely as your legs ! Oh My...they are a Wonder !


    Roberta
    WOW! Thanks Roberta! I've been trying to get a pro make over in my area for a while but can't even get a pro make up artist to respond to my calls/emails. We go to Vegas a bit so I'm planning on using NicoleR's (Primp This) services the next time we go there.

    Nikki

  22. #22
    Blushing June '07 Bride Sheri 4242's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by tess-leigh View Post
    If someone were to do a profile shot of my face, then my mother might get questions about why her picture was there! Scary resemblence! I think that (dressed) I may look more like my mother than my sister does!
    Tess -- that cracks me up b/c I know exactly what you mean! For year's I've said my oldest daughter looks like my side of the family. For years my ex's side of the family has said she looked like them. The first time that my wife (current and lifelong) and I saw some pictures of me after a make-over, we both (almost simultaneously) let out a low whistle. That is maybe the only way my picture would out me b/c, as you said about your mom, if anyone who new this daughter saw my photo, they might start asking my daughter questions regarding why she was on here.

    Quote Originally Posted by nikki_t View Post
    We go to Vegas a bit so I'm planning on using NicoleR's (Primp This) services the next time we go there.
    (((***Sheri wipes steam from her Christie Brinkley frames after reading Roberta's post to Nikki***))) Nikki, if you go to Vegas, I know of a couple of makeup artists out there who might be able to do your makeup and hair.
    [SIZE="4"]Sheri[/SIZE]

  23. #23
    Member Katelyn's Avatar
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    I fear the same thing too because of my job. (That's whay I don't show myself on my avitar) I usually post my full self on the pic and video gallery because those pics can't be accessed by anyone except members only. I know there's still risk involved, but it helps make myself more real to other members.

  24. #24
    Wants red cocktail dress! nikki_t's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sheri 4242 View Post
    (((***Sheri wipes steam from her Christie Brinkley frames after reading Roberta's post to Nikki***))) Nikki, if you go to Vegas, I know of a couple of makeup artists out there who might be able to do your makeup and hair.
    Thanks Sheri!! We try to get out there at least twice a year. Not sure when we'll get out next time but we decided to drive next time (airline almost lost my boobs and patent FMB's last time!! LOL). I'll PM you for the info if we get anything fixed.


    Quote Originally Posted by Clarissa View Post
    I fear the same thing too because of my job. (That's whay I don't show myself on my avitar) I usually post my full self on the pic and video gallery because those pics can't be accessed by anyone except members only. I know there's still risk involved, but it helps make myself more real to other members.
    Clarissa you sneaky devil... just got yourself on myspace and didn't invite me. If we do drive to Vegas be warned it will be via Arizona so I'll have to stop off and clip you round the ear young lady!!

  25. #25
    Member Tip or Ozma's Avatar
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    I would if I did not have a beard.

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