Another close friend gives acceptance of Dawn!

[Dawn D.]

Oh My! After the wonderful weekend I just had, I'm not sure if anything in the future will be able to top it. I told you all in another thread how my Sister-in-Law arrived and with unequivocal acceptance has embraced Dawn as a sister. Well, last evening life for Dawn got even better! I'll explain.

We had a get together at our house with family and friends last evening. A good time was had by all I am sure. There came a time near the end of the gathering that I had engaged a good GG friend in a light conversation about the holidays upcoming. She mentioned that she was out with her husband and another couple doing a little early Christmas shopping that day. They had gone into Ross' Dress For Less. While there, she and the others were approached by an S/A. Nothing to odd about that, except this S/A was quite obviously a MTF transgender individual. She said he was wearing all femme clothing and had polish on his nails.

Now this friend is a very conservative and at times quite opinionated person. I've been aware of her lack of (seemingly) tolerance for sometime and we have even had some rather animated arguments over certain issues. However, we always remain on a very friendly basis. What surprised me and took me off guard was that she said of this instance that "she did not know what to make of it and that" she "just thought, poor fellow, he's just trying to find himself". I listened to what she was saying and expected the normal objections to start, i.e., how wrong it is, men wearing women's clothes or the person has obvious mental issues. But, she never said anything of the sort. Instead, She explained that she did not "understand why he was doing this or the whole Transgendered thing" and that it left her "confused", "why would someone chose to do this, especially in public".

Ladies, I could no longer resist the opportunity. I asked her, "What lets you think that it is a choice to be Transgendered?" Her response, a look of surprise. I continued, "It is becoming more clear everyday on the scientific front that issues such as being Gay or Lesbian or Bi or.......Transgendered are not something a person chooses to do. Rather, they are quite clearly born with the predilection to be who they are." She started to scoff at the idea. I interrupted her with "Well, listen, you've heard of hermaphrodites?" She said, "yes". I explained, "If nature can make a person this way. A way that is so unambiguous as to the person being two distinct sexes on physical appearances, then why could nature not also make a person one sex physically in appearance and the opposite sex mentally in expression?" I apologize Ladies, but, it is the best analogy I could think up at that moment. Though, it must have changed her opinion on that same moment.

Later in the conversation, she started asking why I knew so much about this one issue. UH OH! I'm thinking well, loudmouth, you got yourself in a corner this time. I started with, "you know there are more Transgendered people around than one may think. Truly they tend to keep to themselves for fear of ridicule.............WE are not as openly accepted as Gays, Lesbians or Bi." She caught on to the 'WE' immediately. She said, "Are you...?" After a long moments pause she saw the tears welling in my eyes. I reached up to my collar and pulled the shirt back far enough that she could see the pink strap of my Playtex bra. For a moment I thought "Well, this is it. My life is over, Or at least this friendship." I could not have been more wrong! Stunned to say the least, she reached out took my hand and said " It's alright, I think I understand!" After which we embraced in a very nice hug. We conversed over this for better than an hour. Only the fact that her husband entered the area where we were did we end our talk. During the last part of our talk, she did promise only to let me tell others about me if I so desired. Her lips, she said were "sealed". Please bare in mind that this is a very condensed version of the whole conversation. Just trying to save you all from lot more reading, this one is long enough!

I'll tell you, this is almost too incredible to believe, for me. With first revealing to my Wife (nearly two years ago) and then my Sister-in-Law. Now this GG friend of ours. And, very soon, I will be telling my Mother. My head is in a spin! All of this has turned out so good. A person could not have planned it better. So far it has worked out in my favor. Yes I know "the cats out of the bag", but, telling one somehow makes it easier to tell another and so on. I just hope it does not turn out to be a snowball thrown uphill with me waiting to catch it on the return! Actually I think everything is going to be good.




Dawn

[uknowhoo]

Wow!! I got a lil misty reading this one myself!! Congrats Dawn on your courage you showed and the wonderful outcome with which you were rewarded. I am so very happy for you. Threads like these are a real source of inspiration, to many more people than you may realize. Thanx so much for posting. xoxo Tammi

[CamillaCD]

I have read several posts like this, and every time I feel happy tears wanting to come out. This time too. Thank you for sharing your story.

[pamela_a]

Let me wipe the tears of joy from my eyes before I say I'm so very happy for you Dawn. I believe things will only improve for you now. I hope things go was well with your mother.

-Paula-

[Dayna]

At this time of year we consider our blessings and all we have to be thankful for; you are very lucky to have the support of family and friends, and I am thankful that you shared such an uplifting story with us!

[Angie G]

Thats great Dawn I know it hard keeping it in my wife is the only one that knows about my dressing but I don't want anyone but her to know I've dressed more then 40 years and my wife as known for just over 2 years and is OK with it.
I hope all works out good for you hun
Angie

[kim85]

Congrats on this dawn and ive got my fingers crossed for you that all goes well with your mum
Kim
XXX

[Dawn D.]

Thanks to all of you for your kind words and support! I do just have to add one point that I omitted from my original posting. That is, after this conversation was over, I had this angst inside me and for a moment I wasn't sure why. Then it hit me, I realized I had told this friend about me and I did it without consulting my lovely Wife first!! I really felt bad over it and as soon as everyone left she and I had a conversation of our own. I explained that I had engaged her in this topic purely out of an original attempt to just help her to understand T/G issues. That is was not meant to be done without her (my Wife's) knowledge. However, I was basically to deep in the conversation to back out. My Wife being the beautiful person that she is, completely understood and did not have a problem with it! Ain't she great!!! It's one of her favorite friends anyway! Thanks again!




Dawn

[Mary Morgan]

Dawn, you seem to have a gift. I think some of us need to step up. Maybe we can put an end to much of the misunderstanding and move forward by following your example.
One day at a time, one person at a time. Thank you for your inspiration

[Byllie]

I just realized that what you felt was much like what I felt when I learnedI had Tourettes Syndrome. Okay, you're probably saying, "She's trying to compare CDing to TS?" Well, yes I am. Allow me to elaborate.

As a kid, my tics would wax and wane, but no one knew of TS, so they thought I was nervous. This did wonders for my mental state, I can tell you.

Then as an adult, our daughter began exhibiting tics. We had her evaluated. The Dr. who did the work, in a final session, said, "Your daughter has TS." He then looked at me and said, "And so do you."

Kaboom! With that one statement the mental weight I had been carrying around for years was lifted. No longer need I try to hide my tics. They were a part of me and nothing to be asshamed of.

And CDing? Well, each person we come out to, who embraces us for who we are, lifts a mental weight from opur shoulders. And let me tell you, it's such a relief!

[Sinthia]

Oh My! After the wonderful weekend I just had, I'm not sure if anything in the future will be able to top it. I told you all in another thread how my Sister-in-Law arrived and with unequivocal acceptance has embraced Dawn as a sister. Well, last evening life for Dawn got even better! I'll explain.

r resist the opportunity. I asked her, "What lets you think that it is a choice to be Transgendered?" Her response, a look of surprise. I continued, "It is becoming more clear everyday on the scientific front that issues such as being Gay or Lesbian or Bi or.......Transgendered are not something a person chooses to do. Rather, they are quite clearly born with the predilection to be who they are." She started to scoff at the idea. I interrupted her with "Well, listen, you've heard of hermaphrodites?" She said, "yes". I explained, "If nature can make a person this way. A way that is so unambiguous as to the person being two distinct sexes on physical appearances, then why could nature not also make a person one sex physically in appearance and the opposite sex mentally in expression?" I apologize Ladies, but, it is the best analogy I could think up at that moment. Though, it must have changed her opinion on that same moment.

Later in the conversation, she started asking why I knew so much about this one issue. UH OH! I'm thinking well, loudmouth, you got yourself in a corner this time. I started with, "you know there are more Transgendered people around than one may think. Truly they tend to keep to themselves for fear of ridicule.............WE are not as openly accepted as Gays, Lesbians or Bi." She caught on to the 'WE' immediately. She said, "Are you...?" After a long moments pause she saw the tears welling in my eyes. I reached up to my collar and pulled the shirt back far enough that she could see the pink strap of my Playtex bra. For a moment I thought "Well, this is it. My life is over, Or at least this friendship." I could not have been more wrong! Stunned to say the least, she reached out took my hand and said " It's alright, I think I understand!" After which we embraced in a very nice hug. We conversed over this for better than an hour. Only the fact that her husband entered the area where we were did we end our talk. During the last part of our talk, she did promise only to let me tell others about me if I so desired. Her lips, she said were "sealed". Please bare in mind that this is a very condensed version of the whole conversation. Just trying to save you all from lot more reading, this one is long enough!

I'll tell you, this is almost too incredible to believe, for me. With first revealing to my Wife (nearly two years ago) and then my Sister-in-Law. Now this GG friend of ours. And, very soon, I will be telling my Mother. My head is in a spin! All of this has turned out so good. A person could not have planned it better. So far it has worked out in my favor. Yes I know "the cats out of the bag", but, telling one somehow makes it easier to tell another and so on. I just hope it does not turn out to be a snowball thrown uphill with me waiting to catch it on the return! Actually I think everything is going to be good.




Dawn

Dawn . . . why didn't you tell us to get the box of tissues out when reading this post. My shirtsleeves are still wet.


Byllie . . . Pardon my ignorance, but what are tics?

[DonnaT]

Very nice, Dawn.

She started to scoff at the idea. I interrupted her with "Well, listen, you've heard of hermaphrodites?" She said, "yes". I explained, "If nature can make a person this way. A way that is so unambiguous as to the person being two distinct sexes on physical appearances, then why could nature not also make a person one sex physically in appearance and the opposite sex mentally in expression?" I apologize Ladies, but, it is the best analogy I could think up at that moment. Though, it must have changed her opinion on that same moment.

No need to apologize, I've used the same analogy. Only the PC term is Intersexed now instead of hermaphrodites.

Byllie . . . Pardon my ignorance, but what are tics?

See http://members.tripod.com/~tourette13/