Hello

**pbm35** · 11-24-2007, 08:38 PM

Hi all ! just joined and i need advice...........
i like dressing in womens undies, it helps me relax, and i live a few miles from my gf, she has no idea and i know that she wouldnt aprove at all, what do i do ????

**lisa_e_love** · 11-24-2007, 08:42 PM

Originally Posted by penfild35

Hi all ! just joined and i need advice...........
i like dressing in womens undies, it helps me relax, and i live a few miles from my gf, she has no idea and i know that she wouldnt aprove at all, what do i do ????

Well, I would say that if you're just wearing panties, it's kind of your own business what underwear you wear.

**AllieSF** · 11-24-2007, 08:46 PM

First of all, welcome to the forum. It is a great place to learn and share. After you get 10 posts you can private message other members and join other parts of this forum.

Second, you have two clear choices - The first is to keep it hidden and see where it goes. If it gets serious, everyone here (or almost everyone) will recommend that you let her know. The second would be to tell her and live with her reaction. The end result may be the same for either choice (both good or bad). However, being honest with her is always the best choice in the long run, since you start your serious relationship on the strong foundation of truthful and open communication and not on hidden secrets and lies that may affect your daily lives (hers and yours).

How to tell her has been discussed in many posts here. You can do a search for past threads and posts and get a lot of information that way. Plus this thread will get you some good replies too. Either way good luck.

**pbm35** · 11-24-2007, 08:50 PM

before we got togeher we chatted about things and her ex hubby that did all sorts of things to her used to like wearing her knickers every day as a "control" kinda thing, with me coming into this new relationship with having similar feelings is soooooo confusing

**Laurengrl01** · 11-24-2007, 10:13 PM

Originally Posted by aluchi_aluchona

...you have two clear choices - The first is to keep it hidden and see where it goes. If it gets serious, everyone here (or almost everyone) will recommend that you let her know. The second would be to tell her and live with her reaction. The end result may be the same for either choice (both good or bad). However, being honest with her is always the best choice in the long run, since you start your serious relationship on the strong foundation of truthful and open communication and not on hidden secrets and lies that may affect your daily lives

/\ /\ Well stated /\ /\
penfild35, if you think this relationship is going anywhere, you really should discuss your feelings (sooner rather than latter). You may loose her over this, but better to lay your cards on the table now, so to speak. Over 20 years of marriage (and much to loose), I can tell you it doesn't get any eaiser. It was a character trait that I thought I could expunge, but in the end, it's a part of me I cannot deny... still trying to find a way to talk about this. Very painful and you don't want to be there. Best wishes.
- Lauren

**Deanna2** · 11-24-2007, 10:18 PM

If you think women's undies can help you relax, then you should try women's skirts and really relax.

**trannie T** · 11-24-2007, 10:53 PM

This forum is full of posts from those who hid from their wives for years and years. Rarely the spouse is accepting, usually it presents a tremendous strain on the relationship. It seems that those who talk to their significant other early in the relationship have a far better success rate. If you are serious about this woman she deserves the truth from you.

**sissystephanie** · 11-24-2007, 11:21 PM

I was happily married for 49 1/2 years before my wife passed away. I told her I was a CD before we were married and she totally accepted me as I was. Being completely truthful is the only way to handle the situation. If you lose your GF over your CD activities, she probably was not the right one anyhow. The main thing is to let her know that you are still a man, whether you wear panties or men's shorts. And as others have said, if you think wearing panties is relaxing, try other womens things!!

Sissy/Stephanie

More girl than man sometimes, except for my GGF

**Joanna-Louise** · 11-24-2007, 11:24 PM

Heya and welcome to the forum hun,

First id like to ask you where can you see it going?!? for example i sometimes wear knickers and tights to work, (more so cause its cold here at the moment and it helps insulate my legs in the work i do).

If you can see yourself progressing to wanting to wear skirts, blouses, dresses etc etc etc then really it would be helpful for your sanity if she knew what you did. Otherwise it makes life alittle complicated if she was to stay over etc.

However if you feel that wearing panties/knickers is the relief point your looking for, then i can't really see a reason she has to know, unless of course you forget to change your undies before an "intimate act".

If you do decide to tell her, id recommend you point her in the direction of the forums, she can jion the GG SO's section and chat to other women who are in her situation, which can help her come to terms with it.

Probably not much help here, but unforturtnatly its your call hun...

Good luck,

Jo
xx

**Rachell** · 11-24-2007, 11:27 PM

If she likes sexy stuff maybe try buying a macthing set of panties (men wear undies LOL), one for you and one for her, maybe this will break the ice. My question to you is do you know for sure she would not like your dressing in ladies panties or is that just your opinion? Good luck.
Rachell

Be sure to read Sissysthephanie's post a couple times, she said it so good. WAY TO GO Sissysteph

Rachell

**Lanore** · 11-25-2007, 07:24 AM

Talk to her! It is better than hidding the rest of your life.

Lanore

**Lucy Bright** · 11-25-2007, 07:34 AM

I too recommend talking, especially if you think this relationship is likely to be long term. But her experience with her ex is a complication, for sure. I don't quite understand what that was about (he controlled her by wearing her underwear??), but it's certainly important for you to get her to see that people can do the same thing - in this case cross-dress - from many different motives. You could use an analogy: I drink to relax, my neighbour drinks because he's an alcoholic, by son drinks to look cool - the same act means different thing in each case. However you approach it, if you do approach it, giving her access to good sources of information is key. This forum is one place she could come, or there are plenty of other places on the net where you can point her that will give her a better informed and less jaundiced view of CDing than she's likely to have at the moment, with her experience.

Good luck, whatever you decide!

Kisses,

Lucy

**Raychel** · 11-25-2007, 08:40 AM

Hello, Welcome to the forum. You should sit down and talk to her. If the love is true it will not matter one bit. If it not then she will move on and then you can find the right woman to live your life with. You only have one life, you better be happy.

**kim85** · 11-25-2007, 10:39 AM

Hi and welcome.
Like so many have said its down to you if you tell her or not. I would say tho as an so i would rather know sooner rather than later just due to the fact that the longer its hidden the more lies or half truths are told. Personally i think thats worse than the dressing (not to say that dressing is bad/wrong) but from a finding out aspect the main thing that i know i thought about was the lieing/half truths.

Only you know how she might react and its not an easy thing to tell someone you care about but we are all here to support you no matter which path you choose
Kim
xxx

**tina_43** · 11-25-2007, 05:54 PM

I agree you should sit down and tell her. because if she finds out by accident it will be so much harder on the both of you.

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