Pardon the french but dammit I hate this sometimes, why do I have to be a CD? Why can't I just be a normal guy who lives a normal life?
So here's the short of it, I live at home, in my parents basement. I'm home alone today so naturally I'm all dressed up, no wig or makeup though. I thought I heard someone in the house so I get up to investigate and as I'm going over to the door my cousin is coming around the corner. I slammed the door in his face but I know he got a quick peak. He lives in a different state but is in town and came by to deliver a couch with absolutely no heads up or no warning whatsoever, just showed up. This kid is like a brother to me and I awkwardly got dressed and helped haul the couch inside, feeling the tense awkwardness between us. He was with his fiance' who was waiting outside in the truck. We didn't speak a word about it and I feel completely freaked out and embarrassed that he saw me dressed in womens clothing.
After the couch was in the house, we kind of said some awkward good byes and he was off. I sent him a text apologizing for the incident and asked him not to tell anyone. He text back and said that he didn't really see anything and that he didn't need to know and also said he wouldn't say anything to anyone about it.
I feel like crap about it, I hate being caught like this but this is really only the second time I've ever been actually caught and seen in drag, ever. I don't know, maybe it's a big deal because I'm making a big deal out of it. Maybe I'm over reacting, I don't know but it's causing me a lot of stress here. It is what it is and I can't change the past. But it's hard for me to let it go and not think about it. It's eating me up inside, why do I put myself through this?