Controlling crossdressing

[Hali]

Hi girls i kept wondering....would you prefer CDing the way it is e.g "burging on us anytime it feels like" or for us to have some level of control like a control valve for CDing e.g like a jinee in a bottle to turn it on-off anytime we feel like (oops i guess thats what we've been trying to achieve all along)...but i want to know your opinion

[Amanda Shaft]

So Sosoft, I’d like to turn the valve full on and snap the knob off (good pun). Alas that’s not going to happen so I’ll settle for ‘as and when’, I’ve never liked control though.
Amanda

[Debutante]

Sosoft...
I wish i could control it, but I am learning to let it be and come up as it will...
think of it as a woman would: she learns to feel her feelings and go with the flow of them.... as a man: we want to have some control.... it may not happen.... I have a strong masculine side too: and I am just learning to let the femme feelings cycle their way in....

[Deborah Jane]

I had a control valve called a disapproving wife Since i,ve been single again i dress whenever i want, and now i,m in control...Sort of

[battybattybats]

Attempting to control it just seems to cause problems I think.
The only thing I've found is that waiting till you can't avoid it any longer isn't always the best idea so sometimes dressing when you are only a little in the mood can take some of the desperation out of it and then you can dress in times and ways more practical.

[jaina]

I've never seen it as something that needed to be controlled.

[docrobbysherry]

I think my valve handle DID break off!
RS

[Kristen Kelly]

[SIZE="3"]I tried to control it for 2 years, thought it worked but only aggrevated the problem. Now theres no stopping me I am just me, dress as much as I can, what I think of myself matters more than what the rest of the world thinks of me. I have never been happier even in drab( well the closest I can get to that) I'm still Kristen in my mind.[/SIZE]

[Kate Simmons]

The real art is being able to direct one's feelings, which is really what the dressing is a reflection of, in a positive way that is value added rather than value detractive. The feelings and our feedback from them are what make us or break us really.

[Marla S]

Batty is right. If you want to get more control dress as much as possible, even if you are not in the mood to. That'll help.

[Marvina Martian]

Batty is right. If you want to get more control dress as much as possible, even if you are not in the mood to. That'll help.

I feel that I must have to concur with you as well. When I have tried to control it and keep it down it just seems to come back much stronger and you tend to take more chances. If you are consistent about it it not only becomes more natural but eases the intense urges most of the time!

Dressing is kind of like my sweet tooth, do it in moderation and you won't get fat!

[Angie G]

I don't want to turn it off hun
Angie

[lisa_e_love]

Personally, I don't think it needs to be suppressed or controlled, but I kind of prefer it to be a natural kind of desire. I like to dress when I feel like it rather than when I plan to, I guess. It keeps things a little more interesting.

[Phyliss]

I'd say I have some sort of "controll", it's called "my checkbook"

Given an unlimted budget, well, you just KNOW what would happen. Now, I don't get the chance to "fully dress" (ie skirt/dress, blouse, wig, full out makeup) everyday, but I do wear "female" clothes each day. The "required" threesome of undies, jeans and sweater,from either F.B. or L.B. and some form of footwear from Payless.
So, I guess I don't really have "control" as to what gender type of clothes I wear, just which style I want to put on.

[Mitch23]

my control is an unenthusiastic wife and a family. therefore i have to negotiate and treasure my 'mitch' times. some day things may be different but for now ...

mitch

[Hali]

Thank you ladies for your comments.

I dont know this crossdressing in the sense of "Why are we doing it, why does it stick to us, why is CDing trying to embarass me (forcing me to act feminine while the society expects better from me cos am a kind of a role model interms of my job and position in ma family)" i can go on and on.
why am saying all this is because ma CDing is taking a different dimension. At present, i feel like i dont belong to the male gender in the sense of what is expected of men e.g the way men behave ( dress, pretending to care less about other peoples feelings in fear of beign tagged feminine e.t.c) i feel as if beign a man is "abit outdated" to me, with due respect i feel am bored with beign a man.... i feel beign feminine or female is like a progression to me due to the following advantages i obtained from trying to be "a passable CD"

1- i was able to carry out an intensive research into the purpose of life on earth (my previous knowledge was scanty)

2- i was able to learn alot about my body (biology) and how to take care of ma health better and watch ma weight better and ma appearance both as a male and a CD (all this was not possible before cos as a man am expected to have big biceps, large torso, which comsume more food and other things and that as a man i shoulnt be grooming ma self too much or looking after ma appearance)

3- that the world is extremely diverse ...that if i dont like something i shouldnt condemn it.

4- that GOD might be different from all the previous knowledge i have about him e.t.c

.....the list is endless...MY POINT IS.....
i think ma journey into CDing have been really educational, refreshing and fulfilling.

and if i can control Cding so that i can CD and have my reputation in the society intact (i.e people not discovering except for those i have chosen to inform, and they'll not tell anyone) i will be the happiest man/woman/CD/TG in the world, thanks

[MarinaTwelve200]

"Control" is not turning it off for good, but being able to CHOOSE the TIME and PLACE to do it.---which I can do. If one can't do THAT then one IS in trouble.

CDing is something I learned to do, or "discovered" that makes me feel good. I don't want to give it up and feel no reason to, but like nudity, sex or whatever, there is a time and place for it, and times and places you DONT do it. I figgure if a person can avoid engaging in orgies on the street or streaking in the Mall, one can control the circumstances of one's CDing.

[Hali]

Marina Twelve how can you dress and not-dress when ever you want....give us the secret recipy...pls...pls. i want to "rule" CD not let it "rule" me

[Kate Simmons]

You are discovering a different "you" Hon. One that is entirely different than any outside package. There are two "genies" that come out of the bottle really. One is an illusion and one is real. Being able to tell them apart is what makes all the difference.

[Hali]

salandra...salandra i need more insight ..which one is an "illusion" and which part of us is "real".

Hey i have tried so many times to stop it........

i realise i cant. so i want to control it.

[angelfire]

We kind of already do have a 'magic valve' to shut it off, or turn it on. The problem is, when we shut it off, all that desire builds up on the other side, and when we eventually open the valve, we cause major flooding.

[Lisa Marie]

If you dont want to crossdress anymore just go live with your parents that dissaprove of it. Thats how you can stop.

[Lisa Golightly]

I'm a full-time, all-time, good-time gal

[MarinaTwelve200]

sosoft ---How do YOU define "control"? Never doing it again or being able to do (or not do it) when you want to or "when the time is right"?

I cant imagine a compulsion SO strong that you MUST and DO CD in the here and now, despite the situation and location, any time the urge strikes.
I assume you CAN control WHEN you have sex, for example, and CAN keep your clothes on in public(be they drab or fem) , Elsewise, you would be writing us from a prison or "nerve hospital". How is controling WHEN you CD any different?

I might ceed that you may indeed can't control the when and where of your CDing----but if this is the case you have a very serious problem that I can't relate to. You would need professional help.

I suspect that you are simply HAUNTED by the CD URGE, and have no control of THAT. You likely DO conrol WHEN and WHERE you do it ,when the opertunity arizes. I dont think you CAN control the desire or urge, thats part of all us CDers..we can only control if and when we decide to ACT on the urge.---which is the best we can hope for.

[Nicole Erin]

I am always CD'ed in some form or another.

I understand about the urge to CD tho, I feel the same way about my snoking cigarettes.
Certain compusions and addictions are are hard to control.