Would you really want to be a woman?

[denise-x]

As long as I can remember, as young as age 3 or 4 I always had feminine desires. I always wanted to dress as a girl and do girlie things. I always wanted to be caressed by a man, to nurture my children and yes even take care of a home. However, as society dictated, I lived and tried to live as a guy is expected to. I went out for physical sports in school, even though I hated it. I strongly disliked manly type occupations or vocations. The only thing I had courage to do was wear womans clothing and go out in the evening. Personally, I don't see anything wrong in dressing as you want to be comfortable. I see Scotsmen wearing kilts,which is only a skirt, and it looks very appealing and comfortable, so why not all guys who want to wear skirts?
When I was in my 50's I expressed my feeling to a friend of mine. He looked at me and asked why I don't just go ahead and fillful my feelings. After telling him that I didn't want to be known as a queer or whatever name one calls a gay guy. He pulled me to him and held me and caressed me, well I had the greatest experience of my life. Even though I openly live as a man, I have many male and female friends who treat me and respect me as a woman.

If I had the guts, and didn't have any children, who'd disown me if they knew, I would have gone the whole way and transitioned.

Be true to yourself

LOVE TO ALL

Denise

[KatieC]

Assuming personality quirks, likes/dislikes, and abilities would all more-or-less be the same, I think I would have been happier with my place in the world had I been born female. But I wasn't, and there are so many wonderful things in my life that would be so different that I can't even imagine it (my wife and kids in particular) that I don't really dwell much on the "would you want to be a woman" question.

My transgenderedness is much more along the lines of "I don't want to be (seen as) 'male'" rather than "I want to be (seen as) a woman". If only our culture had a viable third-gender role!

Basically, I want to feel free to be "me", who is neither male nor female but rather a blend of the two, without the fear of ridicule or ostracism.

[Marvina Martian]

I have had this discussion with my wife recently...
I have thought long and hard and know in my heart that if we had never met I most likely would have transitioned long ago.

Now I would have loved to be born a girl, actually when I was little I always wished for it!
So now here I sit, A place between hurting the one person I love the most and my own happiness. Overall I am a pretty upbeat and happy person, even with hiding my secret. I could realistically keep hiding it the rest of my life and be OK. Although I would never be whole.

So, here we are.....At the crossroads of life.

Good question Sal

[JackieInPA]

I have given this subject much thought...indeed i have thought about it every day since i was knowing enough to realizes girls and boys were different. I want to be a daughter, a girlfriend, lover, wife, mother, grandmother. I want it so that sometimes I feel an almost physical pain. Is the female world easier? Prolly not, but it is the world i want to live in. I am not and dont plan on transitioning. I dont feel that will make me a woman, i consider that extremem crossdressing lol. Now dont take offense, I admire those that have the courage to go that rout. If i cant have the real thing I'll settle for pretending when i can. I am married to a wonderful woman who accepts me for who i am and even plays around with me en femme. I have been called a lesbian in a mans body by several of my friends, more like a bi woman in a mans body, cause i do look at some men and wish, but i dont wish for man to man i wish for woman to man.

In 75%+ of my dreams i am a woman that tells me where my innermindset is i think.

[AmandaM]

I have thought about transitioning, but, I have to pass as a woman. I don't want to always be questioned about my gender. I don't want to be an outsider, I want to be free. To me, even though transition is desirable, being accepted is more important. In my 20's this was possible, now I'm not so sure in my 40's. It's like I am on this life train that moves too quick, along comes wife and kids and career and all of a sudden, I'm 20 years older and don't know how to get off the train, or if I even want to. I think my situation is similar to transsexuals 100 years ago. There was no operation, so what do you do? You kinda get taken for a ride.

[NYsong]

No, Yes, and all thats in between. Personally, when my social life is thriving (like its not right now), I love my position. I look great and feel great as both, and the ability to change fairly quickly is awesome.

[UASIANGAL]

My goodness, this question sure dug up a lot of deep thoughts!!! Gee, I just think it simply and straight forward SURE, I would like to be a girl in another life. I don't carry all boy's baggage to this question. If I imagine myself as a women, it would be right from the start and I would be just person like everyone else. Life is what you make of it so I would choose to make it wonderful. You didn't ask me if I wanted a sex change, hormones, pain, crabby boyfriend, ungrateful kids, lazy bum husband, or dish pan hands! God all mighty, it's an imaginary scenario girls! Be creatively positive .... geeeezzzz!

[Sonia_cd]

First of all, thank you for asking this question on a serious level as opposed to posting a poll.

Second, to answer your question at a very simplistic level, no, I would not want to be a woman 24/7/365. Don't get me wrong, I admire and respect women for their versatility, nurturing ability, energy and ability to balance a career, home and family with such ease. Being all of that in one is certainly not an easy task nor is it acknowledged quite enough. Dressing to the nines, the wonderful fabrics and clothes are addictive and to die for, but that is almost like a reward for all the hard work that goes into being a woman.

Besides I like my life a guy enough not to want to give it up. Yes, I would love to walk into a store and try on clothes endlessly but I have to put up with unwanted advances from desperate men, comments about the kind of clothes I wear and let's not forget a woman's worst nightmare, sexual abuse. Do I really want all that? I really think not!!

Does that make any sense?

Love,
Sonia

[Nicole Erin]

...how many of us could really pass a real life trial test, given the opportunity? I tried this last year when I first retired and pretty much did it 24/7 for 3 weeks. I had to stop and look at things realistically and quite honestly was happy to get back to my "safe haven" as a guy. There's a lot more to it than dressing nice and looking pretty. That haven we enjoy is called "male privelege"

I know the shopping, clubbing, going out and glitter are nice but that is only part of it. Even if one is adept to all the mundane household chores like cooking, cleaning, laundry, etc. you still have shopping and errands to run, grocery shopping, etc. I do most of that, my wife does not. Nothing glamourous about that stuff for sure. That's not even thinking about taking care of little ones,monthly stuff, appointments and the like. I do that too. Our "little one" is a preteen so he is lower maintenance It takes a special type of fortitude to do all of this. I have that special fortitude, IOW, I rule! Is it any wonder that our SO gets that "look" on her face when we say we are tired because we "worked" all day?

Bottom line like my wife told me years ago when I first came out to her, there is nothing "glamourous" about being a woman. It's really about hard work, dedication and caring for your loved ones. How women do it is beyond me and it takes a special person indeed to really want to transition and fulfill all of this criteria. It's not as easy as it may seem.This is why I have to think twice these days before answering that question.

I admit I AM guilty of letting the femme take care of most family obligations. I don't Xmas shop or any of that. But yeah most of that stuff I do anyways.

The femme and I kinda share a lot of chores. Depends on who is home and when and what needs done.

By the way, if I were to be a woman 24/7, do I have to have periods?

[LisaLedoux]

Years ago when I was younger the answer was NO! but now that I've gotten older, some of my sex drive has decreased and I am more financially sound and have more free time, the answer is a resounding YES!

[bEEb]

No. But I would like to have a body like one. Especially a buxom one.

[Mariah]

I am a female, Working on the outside now. :P


keris

[Carol A]

I think about it all the time BUT!, I had the chance to go full time last year when the wife was away in Germany for 3 weeks.
Oh my I had one hell of a good time going out everyday and enjoying my freedom, but after a week I was ready to go back being a male. Man all the makeup the time to get dressed or down dressing during the day it's a lot of work. As much as I would like to go full time I don't think so.

[Jennifer Giovannetta]

Hi Salandra. The thought of being a woman permanently has crossed my mind a few times. The answer is no. I would not like to be a woman. You said it best, you reffered to it as your "safe haven as a guy". When I read this I had to respond because it really hit the nail on the head for me. Sometimes when I am dressed, I do not want to go back to being a guy. But when I do go back, its sort of like im home again. Dont get me wrong, I love to become Jennifer. And I am thankful for this, because I cannot imagine the wanting of becoming a woman full time. I like to be a man too. Thanks for the food for though Salandra.

[Colleentg]

Yes, I continue to dream it.

[Cassy11]

Salandra you really struck a chord in me when you mentioned hard work dedication and caring for your loved ones. When my mother inlaw who was ill and up in age fell and broke her hip she and my sister inlaw who has Down Syndrome moved into our home. My wife cared for her 24/7 until she passed. My sister inlaw still lives with us and requires a lot of care. She has been with us 8 years.

It seems to me when it comes to caring for the elderly parents or a sick sibling it's the women of the family who are called upon to do the task. It's very rare when I hear of a guy jumping up to say I'll do it. A friend on this site "Julogden" could probably say something about that.

I love the dressing and my wife supports my doing it but I couldn't be a woman 24/7

[srinn]

I probably couldn't act like a girl/woman all the time so the answer is no...

[Sinthia]

I grew up many years ago, and things were difinitely different then. One of my brothers and said more than once that 'that was all we knew'. You cannot go back and change the way things were when you were young, and it does no good to be bitter and hateful about not having things or having the time to do as you please as some of your friends did.

The same can be said about your question. Being raised as a male is 'all we knew'! I dream of being able to look and act female, being able to wear whatever I want whenever I want, etc., but I did not grow up that way, and would not want to give up the memories and life that I have had already. Perhaps I do not have as strong a desire at crossdressing as some of you seem to have, but I do enjoy the feeling that I do have, and do not want it to go away.

[Nikki A.]

Hi Sal
I guess it is all a matter of degrees. If we were GGs then dressing down isn't a problem, you are a woman and look it make up or not. For most of us this is not true, take off the war paint and padding and we are guys.
Being a woman is not easy, but neither is being a guy sometimes. In my case I am now Mom and Dad to my two teens, I'm lucky in that they are a help and do share the load.
I guess that my answer is yes. If I was naturally passable, and much youger and thinner. At this point in time, I guess the answer is no.

[wishonastar]

I do know that being a woman is not about glamor and being beautiful all the time. Nice clothes, jewelry, make up etc.

They have the same problems men do, zits, job problems, hair problems etc.

I think it is mainly about how one like ones self. I do not like my body or looking in the mirror. I do not like being a man it is too much pressure and stress to be in charge and being the one ALWAYS responsible for everything like money. I am tired of it. Anything does wrong it is my fault.

I do not know if I could make it as a woman because it is a different life style. I have been in this one for 50 some years. Also being a beautiful woman is a burden. I would not like the attention all the time. But once in a while would be nice.

So would I really want to be a woman? In the next life if it is possible. I am stuck in this one as a man, as frustrating as it is! And at my age making changes like that does not make sense.

[Stephanie]

These days, this sort of question is so difficult to answer because, at least to me, I don't see a LOT of clear differences between what it means to be "be a man" or "be a woman" (beyond the obvious anatomical differences) in today's society in terms of significant advantages or disadvantages. I can't really imagine any specific advantages to actually becoming a woman that would change my life in any significant way if I were given the opportunity to magically become a woman other than for being able to experience what it would be like to have a few different body parts and/or an expanded choice of "socially acceptable" attire every day. For me at least those two things wouldn't really be enough to convince me to want to become a woman on a permanent basis, which is why I have absolutely no interest in ever having a sex change. It would certainly be interesting to experience being a woman for just a few days to check it out but I don't want to alter my physical appearance permanently (other than maybe getting rid of annoying body hair), at least not until my next incarnation. Also, no sex change will EVER make anybody a true member of the opposite sex in terms of full biological functioning (i.e. pregnancy, etc.). Frankly, I'm perfectly happy being an open-minded man who just happens to enjoy playing "dress up" every once in a while for a bit of fun.

[Chrissy8888]

This is a difficult post to reply to. I am not really sure that this really has any baring on this post or not. It is my belief that everybody’s level of femininity (or desire to be a woman) depends on each individual. For some, they simply enjoy wearing female clothing. They like the way it feels and makes them feel. For others it is much deeper than that. Even though they may never have surgery they are truly transgender. Again it is an individual thing.

For the simple cross-dresser, the answer to this may (or may not) be hell no. For the transgender person it will be the same. However I think that the feelings of a true transgender person is more female oriented than male oriented. With that said several of you commented about how hard it is to be a woman. Well without a doubt that is true. Most woman I know go about 23/7. They never ask for anything in return. They just do it!!! Several of you commented on what it takes to prepare yourself as a woman. It does take great time to prepare yourself to look good. Just like men have been raised to be men, women have been raised to be women. Most of us despite our age are really like a teenaged girl. We are learning what it takes to be a woman.

So what about me. Well I really feel that I was born in the wrong body. It has always been that way. I remember being like 5 years old playing with a little neighbor girl and telling her I really wished I was a girl. Like many of you I even wished and prayed it would happen but it didn’t. I was made the way I was. So if I could live as a woman 24/7 would I. I absolutely would. However it is because my brain tells me what woman do in life is what I should be doing. Not the guy things. However I really don’t think I will ever be at a point where I could transition. I have really come to terms with that. So I will be the very best man that I can be, and the very best woman, all at once. I think even though you might look like a guy you can be a woman too. In today’s society there is not as much emphasis on being macho or in total control. Woman too (although not as much as should be) are becoming powerful. If I can just learn to balance both worlds than I will be was womanly and manly as I can. In my heart I will be both a man and woman 24/7.

Sorry that this is so long and don’t hate me for rambling or even deviating from the subject.

[Traci_Ann CD]

I never would've thought about this years ago BUT here recently.....it's something that has crossed my mind.

I think it would be a nice feeling to get up in the morning, take a shower, cleaned up and put some makeup on (lipstick, etc), slip on a tight-n-sexy business suit, some heels, grab my purse walk confidently out the door to work. Knowing I look very good-n-sexy and all eyes will be on me (women and men). Knowing I AM the center of everyones attention. Does have a nice feeling about it.


I know it won't happen right now....but who knows.....the more and more I think about it.....I may transition into womanhood somewhere down the road.

[Kieroney]

Funny you should ask that question, I find myself saying the same things, your wife is correct, being a woman all the time would be way to much hassle and a pain. If I was total complete gg at birth then the story would be different of course, I just like my cake and Icecream to.

[Kayla_CD]

I could never be a woman for real. I think half of what makes crossdressing fun is that it's special and different. If I had to spend an hour on hair and make up every morning I'd start resenting it.