Do you ever get to the point in life where you decide "enough is enough"?
What do you do then?
Do you ever get to the point in life where you decide "enough is enough"?
What do you do then?
I've always been back and forth - sometimes I get sick of it I just want to throw all my clothes and shoes away...but it always comes back. I've grown to accept that this is who I am, and I think that's the most important thing.
well that depends on what you decide is enough
Enough of Crossdressing ?
Enough of Hiding ?
Enough of abuse ?
Enough of confusing issues ?
Enough of people not understanding ?
Would you like to clarify what you mean ?
Enough of the cr*p that life keeps sending my way!!
Last edited by Deborah Jane; 01-25-2008 at 03:27 PM.
Hike up the panties and give it another go. Most of all, don't ever give up on yourself.
Find a good friend, if that is possible theses days .
joanne
I wish I would have quit giving up years ago. There are still difficult moments and I still wonder what makes me different from everybody else. But I am different. No doubt about it. I'm not only trying to learn to live with it, I want to learn to love it. Its just another part of me after all. Now if only I could just walk out that door whenever I wanted and be who I am!
yin/yang
I started writing a reply explaining things, but it sounds like i,m feeling sorry for myself. I,m not..I,m past that. I guess i,ve just reached a point in my life where i,m thinking whats the point, it,ll just go wrong anyway. BTW being Debs is only thing i,m ok with...It,s whats keeping me going...Just wish i looked better as Debs..lol But thats not a big issue to me!
Last edited by Deborah Jane; 01-25-2008 at 03:25 PM.
I think you should go to your doctor. I hit a very low point in my life last June; but I reconised the thoughts and feelings from a previos low point a few years ago. I went to my doctor and talked things through a bit, she was very understanding. off work for a few weeks and managed to sort a few issues out and have now reached a level where things are better, I'm also learning not to take things to heart to much. even being a part of this forum where I can be sabrina is nice thing.
I know it is easier said than done, but if things are bad do seek some help or talk too someone.
Sabrina.
What matters most is how you see yourself.
I,ve been in therapy for over a year now. We just get through one set of issues and something else go,s wrong. I don,t feel i can get anywhere at the moment. I think thats why i,ve decided "enough is enough"!
I am at that point now. I have been seeing a therapist since November. It has help somewhat, but I don't know where its going to go or what she will be able to do for me.
Debs never ever give up ...please remember we all love you . it's hard and if i tell you my hard luck story well ... just never give up . dust yourself off and yell NEXT and move on .. you can do it ..
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
If I had, I would have given up a few times. More than once, my wife has gone in the the Hospital for mental health reasons, with each time being no less than 4 days. This puts an enormous strain on me to manage my personal emotions, my work load, loss hours at work, my kids and maintianing the whole house. I have said that to the kids when they are acting..."Thats enough, you two?". When you get to the point were enough is enough, you have to push to tip the scales back to your side.Originally Posted by deborah jane
Drumming, My other hobby
Be thankful for what you have and do your best about what you dont have.
Then just keep trying to cope as best you can.
Thats what I do anyways.
I no longer worry about the things I cannot control Deborah. I just do the best I am able with the things that I can.
Second star to the right and straight on till morning
You know, instead of deleting what you're writing, just because you're feeling sorry for yourself, why don't you try writing it down anyway and posting it? Many of us go through the same things everyday and many times we don't write them down because they do sound like the 'woe is me' ritual. However... sometimes, it's just good to vent, get it all out, you might even feel better for it.
I'll start shall I? I've had a shit day, I had allocated shopping money, I even went so far as to add it all up on the tesco website just to make sure I had enough... oh but did I have enough... NO... well I did, but way over my budget... and that sucks.. cus now I feel crap, because I don't have enough this month to go towards my new cooker... you can play the violins now
Your turn
Administrator
Missing my Libra babe Sherlyn, I hope she's rocking up there with the angels
Missing our Rianna, doesn't seem right, gone to early, hope she's partying with Sherlyn
Like any activity you enjoy, sometimes it's good to take a break. When you come back it'll be that much more refreshing.
When you hit the point where enough is really enough... when there isn't a thread or two left in your rope and you are slipping... and when you are as tired and tired of it as you can ever be, you do two things and you do them as fast as you can:
You start saying thank you, to yourself or to whoever out there you think might even remotely be listening, for everything you can find that is even remotely nice around you. Even if that is just a cold cup of tea, a hot cup of coffee, a warm bed, or the little blade of green grass that is still bothering to struggle it's way up through a bit of concrete to put some color in your world even though it's life is hard and it gets stepped on constantly.
Then you go out and do nice things for other people. Start with whatever you can do, but do something. Smile at someone. Give someone a break when they don't deserve it. Compliment someone. Give a bum a dollar or a dime, no matter what he is going to spend it on. Make someone a cup of coffee. Take a cheap box of donuts to an office where people have a sucky or unappreciated job and tell them thanks. Start doing that stuff and keep doing it.
When life is really hard, and it seems like there may not be any angels out there or that if there are, they have got to much to do for them to take the time to help you, then just figure the next guy probably needs the encouragement just as much as you, so give it to him or her whether you get it for yourself or not.
In short: When you've got nothing left to work with, say thanks for the next thing you see and for everything else you can find. And when you fall all the way to the bottom, start giving all the other people there a hand up as fast as you can. The way out is teamwork.
After that, I don't know, I guess it's different for everyone, but a friend of mine, who went through some real crap, once told me he had learned a usefull phrase in AA. 'When in doubt, do the next right thing.'
Get very drunk and giggle a lot.
Der Transsexuellaußenseiter
The lovers have flown...
[SIZE="3"]VENI VIDI VICI[/SIZE]
A quick explanation of things gone wrong!!
Sexually assaulted by my friends stepfather at age 13..I,m just dealing with it now in therapy after years of shame.
My 2 closest friends committed suicide..I know longer let friends become close...Dealing with it in therapy.
The only woman i ever loved is divorcing me over crossdressing...Coming to terms with it.
I,m scared i,ll lose my 3 children through either the divorce or the fact i,m not much fun to be with anymore...I couldn,t ever come to terms with it.
Other problems adding to it..Health issues, work, housing, etc
BTW..I,m not feeling sorry for myself..I,ve just had enough!!
And now i feel stupid here for opening up!!
Last edited by Deborah Jane; 01-25-2008 at 04:40 PM. Reason: Added last line
Nope Debs, not stupid.. Just among friends. You don't have to be close to friends for them to be good and helpful and for them to love you. You don't even have to know them.. Sometimes it's enough that you go through the same shit and need to know that you aren't alone... that there are kindred spirits out there dealing with the same stuff. Sometimes friends aren't the people you meet and hang out with year after year. You may mean the world to a person you sit next to in a bar once in your life, even if you never know it. Friends come and friends go. I hate it when they kill themselves like yours did. I'll tell you though, Debs, there are more people out there than you think who benefit from it when you share your worries with them and let them help. There are even more yet who just feel a little easier knowing that they aren't the only one out there who is carrying a load that seems heavier than they can ever manage. It's not that agony loves company, it's just easier to deal with shit when you know you aren't the only one dealing with it. I've been closer to your position than you know, and I appreciate you sharing your feelings and letting me write back to you. When crap genuinely sucks, it isn't feeling sorry for yourself if you feel bad. Feeling sorry for yourself is complaining because your free cookie was the wrong flavor. The kindest thing you can do for some of us here is to let us know that we aren't the only one's out there that have those times in our life, that we aren't alone with the issues we face, by being yourself and sharing not just the good, but the crappy stuff with us.
You can't lose your kids through cd'ing... but only you can make the relationship work with you and your kids. If you're no fun to be with, then why not? have they said that? Do you take them out? if not, why not?
I'm sorry what happened to you, and for your friends, I have no advice to give on that, I've never been there, so I do not know how to answer that.
It's your life, if you really have had enough, then do something about it, take one issue at a time and deal with it as best as you can. Your children are for life, no one can take them away, but if you're pushing them away, then you need to start fixing that, before you lose them because you're not being a fun dad.
Administrator
Missing my Libra babe Sherlyn, I hope she's rocking up there with the angels
Missing our Rianna, doesn't seem right, gone to early, hope she's partying with Sherlyn
Debs, YOU ARE NOT STUPID FOR HAVING FEELINGS. That just makes you human. Welcome to the race.
With regard to the two friends, they may have felt that there was no one who cared, nor anyone they could talk to about what was troubling them. From what I've read here on this forum, pretty much anything is a fair topic, and writing about it is in fact good therapy. So as Tamara said, don't suppress the feelings you have (because it can damage you.)
Divorces DO suck, on that point most would agree. But it is a process that will eventually be over, and there IS life after the big D. You're a good person, and knowing that and repeating it to yourself over and over will keep your attention on the important things (being the best Pop you can, being civil even when others are not being civil to you, keeping your personal integrity.) This will lead to character, and at the end of the day, a more powerful you (may be hard to believe, but I believe it, having gone through a pretty bad D not so long ago.)
Our thoughts ARE with you! Do hang in there, and drop a PM if you need to, OK?
Heidi99
Not stupid. Just human.
Children are a precious gift. Do what you need to do to make that relationship work and the rest will fix itself. You can only lose your kids if you drive them away. Otherwise they will always be yours. And often, even when you drive them away they still come back to you.
I have my kids every Sunday and we always do something they enjoy. We really enjoy our time together, but after i drop them off i nearly always get upset about not being with them. My daughter knows about "Debs" and is ok with it, i suspect my eldest son does too. I think sometimes though they know i,m struggling to be a "fun dad"..Kids seem to notice things like that.
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