The story im about to tell you is true. ive lived with the shame for 34 years.
Cecil my real name :-() age 6 found a 38 revolver in a bed side table.
played with it a couple of times. and one day pointed it at his sister "Tisha"
and pulled the trigger.
15 minuts later my sister and the only playmate i ever had was dead.
even at the age of 6 i knew the pain and shame of what id done.
lonely as a human can be i started dressing in her cloths.
at six there was no sexual intent involved. it made me feel closer to her.
it help me through a very hard time in my life.
about 6 years later still secretly dressing in my sisters cloth my uncle found out and blackmailed me in to sex. molesting me.he took me hard taking what he wanted .crying and wimpering i lerned to be submisive.dont tell keep the shame inside.not only about him but about the dressing in her cloths.
to be honest i knew hed get in trouble about molesting me. But the truth about how i was in those cloth of my sister and why was much more scary of a secret than being ****ed by my uncle ever could be. this went on for years.
then it stoped. 4 years later i met my wife Tine.
weve been married for 20 years now.she is the only person besides my children that i can say i actualy Love.
but recently when she gets mad she brings up the dress up thing in front of the children. Shaming me in to ither shuting up or giving in to whatever she want at the time.Cross Dressing black mail . !!!!!!!!!!!!!
yesterday i dressed up to take some pics for this web site. when she came home she saw i was clean shaven a dead give away that i was playing Shecil
She started insulting and shaming me in front of our 14 year old son Cody.
she has used this tactic b4. i allways backed down and gave in to her whim. Whatever it was. i cryed for a day then i knew i had to tell cody the truth. to take away her power over me. i was scared becouse up until 3 days ago when i found this fourm i thought i was alone in the cross dressing thing.
the only person in the world that knew was my wife Tina.
she used this weeknes to black mail me. this is the true crime.
i never thought someone i loved would ever use the pain of killing my sister and being molested by my uncle as leverage against me.
I was heart broken. the only thing left for me to do was come clean to my oldest son Cody. i sat him down and told him i had somthing to tell him.
and he wasnt going to like it but i was counting on his understanding and his love. you see i knew he had these copacitys becouse he is of me.
I am truly a house wife. i gave hime these qualitys of acceptance and love.
my childern are the only things ive done right in my life.
and im proude of that .
I spilled the beans to him. I told him every thing.
Cross Dressing,Being atracted to men,feeling more like a mother that a father.
He said....................Dad I love You........................................
The tears spilled out like a broke dam.
and it didnt come of much of a shock. he said he kinda allways knew.
and it didnt bother him a bit. i know that boy inside and out. and i knew he truly ment it.
my heart felt free. a huge lode was lifted from me.
3 days ago i was alone. now i am me. i am what i am whatever that is.
to have somone you love blackmail you is horible.
But to have somone you love tell you they love you no matter what you are is the reason for living
I love you my friends
See Ya
Shecil
it turns out. love responds to love. who knew :-()
Hard Truths
I'm very sorry.
Originally Posted by Priscilla1018
