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  1. #1
    ~~Post Modern Romantic~~ KewTnCurvy GG's Avatar
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    Exclamation Female feelings, female thoughts, female desires?

    Okay, you all share your makeup tips, post your photos, talk about how to create the illusion of a female form. So below the surface, what lurks that makes you feel female? What aspects of your person, beyond the obvious, make you feel female, make others' perceive you as female? I really want to know. Please be as honest and detailed as you can. Thanks, in advance, as always for your candor and willingness to share.
    hugs
    kew
    ~Dear Dorothy,
    Hate Oz, took the shoes, find your own way home.
    Toto~

  2. #2
    Silver Member Sherlyn's Avatar
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    too me its the illusion .... i say i feel like a girl... but it must be the illusion of which i see in my pics of a girl that deliver's me ..too thinkin im female .... however as much as i may say i feel female i think its the girl i seein my pics and societies rules that sez if i wear make up and female clothes therefore i am looked upon as a female therefore i feel like a girl ...must mean in my mind... that coz i look like female.. i THINK i feel female ...of which i must say in honesty i really do not know how a female feels inside ...i am male

  3. #3
    ~~Post Modern Romantic~~ KewTnCurvy GG's Avatar
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    hugs grrl, thanks my love for trying to put what is quite abstract and difficult to identify into words.
    hugs, love and kisses
    me
    ~Dear Dorothy,
    Hate Oz, took the shoes, find your own way home.
    Toto~

  4. #4
    Member sarah's Avatar
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    Hi Kew,
    Thats a very good question ..For me its internal the way a sad movie makes me feel ,the way i am aware of peoples moods ,allways ready to hug someones sadness away ,never being able to say NO to a friend in need (or in fact anyone as my GG will tell you)Kissing is another of my female traits .I love to kiss ,for as long as the other person wants (as long as they are a good kisser)Sometimes Tessa and i will spend the whole night just kissing and cuddleing ..This is becoming more abstract than Sherlyns reply but finally the most precious intermal female trait i have is wanting to look more beautiful everytime i dress up...xxx
    Last edited by sarah; 04-27-2005 at 12:15 AM.
    Sarah
    TRY IT IF YOU DONT LIKE IT DONT DO IT AGAIN

  5. #5
    Member Summer's Avatar
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    Feelings?

    Good question! I don't feel one way or the other about being dressed. I have never given it a thought. I am out in public dressed all the time and it is so confortable to me I just don't think about being feeling female or male.

    Summer

  6. #6
    Tristen Cox
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    Joy a hard question Okay try to follow me because I'm no shrink or anything. I have never related with guys very well. Their thinking, their physical movements, the way they act in character. All these things I have had to watch and assimulate, but they did not feel right to me. However I can relate to women or rather, I understand them in many ways without 'trying'. This extends from childhood through adulthood, marriage and old age. There's just something uniquely magical about the female gender, and men just don't seem to have much mystery to them. Hence to me being male seems extremely boring. For myself being TS, I do not have to wear clothes to express what I feel is my feminine side. I only do so to change my body's appearance. I feel more soft and caring inside than hard/brutish and masculine. Without going too deep here(ok well maybe), when making love that is when I have no clue of male hood and the 'other' inner self prevails over all. I'm totally female and can't even try to hide it. Sorry folks I'm not going into too much detail there, although I will say that any male thoughts at that time shut off and I have been scared more often than not that my female partner would reject me due to me acting like another female rather than a man during sex. That's the only time I can not hide what I am inside(cause I don't know any other way to be). Everybody just like really quiet huh...*room goes silent*

  7. #7
    Tiffany Lee Tiffy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sarah
    Hi Kew,
    Thats a very good question ..For me its internal the way a sad movie makes me feel ,the way i am aware of peoples moods ,allways ready to hug someones sadness away ,never being able to say NO to a friend in need (or in fact anyone as my GG will tell you)Kissing is another of my female traits .I love to kiss ,for as long as the other person wants (as long as they are a good kisser)Sometimes Tessa and i will spend the whole night just kissing and cuddleing ..This is becoming more abstract than Sherlyns reply but finally the most precious intermal female trait i have is wanting to look more beautiful everytime i dress up...xxx

    I agree, Very well written. I could not have done a better job.

    April
    no matter how much love we have, we can not feel it if we are not happy inside

    "Life's journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways totally worn out, shouting "Holy ****, what a ride!",author unknown

    Women to me are gods greatest forms of beauty and art in motion.

  8. #8
    The true Drama Queen Kimberly's Avatar
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    There are psychological tests whether your brain works best with problems that women can do well in and men can do well in.

    Men = Logical thought, problem solving, visualising components/objects re: problems.
    Women = Colour perception, shape identification etc.

    I came out as roughly 50:50... and whether you read into these 'tests' or not, I believe that my brain is that - 50:50.

    It is not like I'm female one minute and male the next, it's that I am me, and always me... I am just more feminine than some of my male friends.

    I cannot truly say whether I feel feminine/masculine because I have nothing to compare it with... as human beings we only have OUR interpretation of the world to base our judgement on, so none of us will truly know what it is to be feminine. Our view can only be shaped by feminine things we see or hear about. As said by Sherlyn:
    Quote Originally Posted by sherlyn
    i think its the girl i seein my pics and societies rules that sez if i wear make up and female clothes therefore i am looked upon as a female therefore i feel like a girl
    And so my crossdressing is both an example of what I see that is attractive about women and femininity and also an outward expression of my feminity within me. Dressing just brings out the feminine side within me.

    [size=3]Hugs xx[/size]

    [size=2]"You don't have to be fat to be a lady", Sophie 2006[/size]
    [SIZE=1]"Hey, those are nice shoes, but they'd look better in my pants! ... I mean..." Robot Chicken, 2006[/SIZE]
    [size=1]"He's just said a word we don't understand! And he's won at scrabble with it!" - Eddie Izzard 1998[/size]
    [SIZE=1]"Head over heels is fine, unless you're in stilettos." -The Beautiful South, 2005[/SIZE]
    [size=1]"Forgive me. Let live, me." - Antony and the Johnsons 2005[/size]
    [SIZE="1"]"We walk amoung you..." TransAmerica, 2005[/SIZE]
    [size=3]THREAD SUCCESSFULLY HIJACKED[/size]

  9. #9
    StephanieCD
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    I don't have time to read this whole thread but I couldn't resist posting on a Kew thread.

    The first thought that pops into my head in response to your question...

    Mystique. Self-indulgence. Finding joy in one's self - an art often scoffed at by "men". And, oddly... power-envy. I once read an advice column where a woman said she hated sex because it made her feel like she was powerless; submitting. The writer responded that she should realize the crippling power her body has over the man's body - that she's not submitting but allowing, controlling, and then... *ehem* rendering flaccid. It's a sexual example but it applies to everything from walking through a store, to ordering drinks, and more...

    Synopsis: the mystique of finding joy in the power of being one's self is the embodiment of femininity. To me... right now... at this moment... from the outside, looking in.
    Last edited by StephanieCD; 05-04-2005 at 09:16 PM. Reason: typo-s drive me nuts

  10. #10
    Pausing To Femme-flect melissacd's Avatar
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    My Thoughts

    There is a certain beauty and elegance in the feminine ideal that I find very attractive. I appreciate that being a woman is very very hard work, especially if you are a working mother with children. I realize that it is not all just the glamorous parts (clothes, hair, make-up, shoes). I enjoy exploring the wonderful aspects of being feminine, exterior and interior. I desire to reclaim my femininty without losing my masculinity. I believe that we need both.

    Some feminine, not specifically female, traits:

    - being sensitive to the needs of others
    - being a good listener
    - being supportive
    - being intuitive
    - being emotionally expressive
    - looking sensual, being sensual
    - being soft, yet assertive
    - having feminine mannerisms when you feel like it
    - creating warmth and comfort for those around you
    - being caring and compassionate
    - being creative with that certain girlish flair
    - having a sense of style
    - avoiding vulgarity as a communication style
    - carrying yourself with grace

    I love femininity and I believe that it is not just the domain of females. Physiologically, males and females are different, that is true, but not really all that different. Men are encouraged to be tough, competitive and emotionally distant. I feel that takes so much away from your full humanity. It is so limiting.

    I feel that men and women both have masculine and femininine personas. Recently, cultural norms have made it acceptable for women to express a very broad range of feminine and masculine characteristics. Men, however, are culturally locked within
    their masculine roles. Some, in the transgendered communities are starting to break through this barrier, however, I suspect it will be some time before that wall is knocked down.

    I think part of the reason that more men are seeking this alternative life style is that they are tired of the confines of what is culturally acceptable. They are tired of having to be macho, having to be the provider and protector. Those societal norms are starting to shift for women, but men are still waiting in the wings. For some men it is because their pride and ego get in the way of accepting who they really are. For others they are seeing the light, seeing their softer side and just chomping at the bit for when it is okay to express all of who they are.

    While the statistics would lead us to believe that only 10% of the male population are cross dressers, I would argue, if you could get an honest answer from most men you would find that in fact the number is more like 90%. How could anyone not want to be a more caring, sensual, intuitive soul...

    Melissa Eh!
    Last edited by melissacd; 04-27-2005 at 11:52 AM.
    What stop do I get off at? Hmmm...

  11. #11
    Gold Member Julie York's Avatar
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    hmm interesting.

    I don't seem to fit in this at all. But I can't help posting because it is intriguing.

    To me, I see it as like a child's game. It is REAL emotionally, in the same way that killing aliens and saving the planet is 'real' when you are six years old.

    But with cross dressing. it's the game of 'Lets pretend I am a girl' with all the lack of responsibility and exaggeration of a child's game. Sound effects too big (Kerpow!) big heels....emotions too big (I'm dying Captain!)...Oh look a cute little puppy, does my hair look pretty?

    It's the game that allows me to be sexier than I would be in real life, more emotional, more soft, more fun, more ....girly!

    Then we all take the clothes off and go home, have a bath, watch Dr Who and go to bed.

  12. #12
    Pausing To Femme-flect melissacd's Avatar
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    Julie

    Well said...
    What stop do I get off at? Hmmm...

  13. #13
    1-800-YOU-WISH Brandy_Marie's Avatar
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    Kew,

    Thanks for this one. I am sorry, folks, but this one might be long.

    Many of the posts already have hit on some of my feelings, but no one post has completely summarized it.

    I've always gotten along better with girls. It's easier for me to have conversations with them, etc. I've always had more fun hanging out with them. All of my closest friends are women. I hate the way most men treat women; although I've seen my fair share of decent men screwed over by women that needed a swift kick in the *ss.

    I do often exhibit traits that are considered 'for women only'. I'm not afraid to cry, or show emotion. Most people still view cooking as a female dominated arena; I love cooking. On the other hand, I'm about as good at cleaning house (and as inclined to) as the stereotypical male. I do not always feel bad when I see a dead animal, I don't think all babies are cute, I do enjoy watching American football, I do believe that everyone should own a gun (and know how to use it). I don't believe in hunting for sport; it's one thing to kill out of necessity, but doing it for fun is just cruel and unnecessary. I don't know the first thing about fixing anything other than a computer, I'm horrible with tools, and I'm a disaster when it comes to cars. I grow my nails out, I hate it when I break a nail, and it disgusts me to do anything involving dirt if I can avoid it. I absolutely love women's fashion, makeup, hairstyles, etc. And I am the fashion police; if you've got it, flaunt it - if you don't, hide that sh*t. I've gotten griped at while standing in line at the Magical Kingdom in the Walt Disney World resort for having an in-depth conversation with several female friends over the differences between clitoral and g-spot orgasms. Most of my female friends describe me as 'the only man they've ever met who suffers from PMS'. My wife agrees. I'm moody, and I can be a b*tch or an *sshole, but I'm much better at the former. I love being able to answer just about any question someone can ask about a field that I am well-informed in, but I am much more concerned with people's emotional well-being than being right or having all the answers.

    In relationships, I've never done well when I've been the 'dominant' person who has to take the lead. Those relationships have always ended in miserable failure. My most successful relationships have been with women who are more assertive, agressive, more dominant, yet still retain some sense of femininity. Most of those, though, are rarely satisfied with just one person.

    Sexually, I've always been 'different'. Pardon me if I step into the realm of TMI here. I thought I was gay, until I lost my virginity to a woman, and then there was no doubt left. Dirty, disgusting, mannerless, hairy pigs (I mean men) do absolutely nothing for me. I've always focused more on pleasing my lover than I have on receiving pleasure. I'm one of the few guys I've ever met that prefers giving to receiving when it comes to oral sex. Long, slow, passionate kissing is one of the most arousing things ever. Matter of fact, wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am just doesn't do it for me. My nipples are way more sensitive than most of the men I've ever known. My ideal sexual experience is being made love to as a woman by a woman. When it comes to porn, I like both written and pictoral, but I always prefer woman-on-woman. I do enjoy the arousal and release of being male, but I definitely feel a sense of loss for not being able to experience ecstacy as a woman.

    On the other hand, I have no desire to have SRS (or GRS, however you prefer). The way I see it is this: I was born a woman trapped in a man's body for a reason. There is a lesson in this life that I am supposed to learn; it is not my place to tamper with it. I want to be a woman, and I can be one as much as possible internally and externally, but since surgery will not make me a complete GG, then I might as well keep what I have. Although breasts would be nice.

    I thought of myself as a woman trapped in a man's body long before I ever considered crossdressing as a lifestyle. I have often wondered why it is that I feel this way. Seeing as how I believe in reincarnation, I long ago hit upon the idea that I was a woman in most recent previous life. As I've grown older, I've come to believe that a soul is born into this world to go on a journey. No two soul's journies are ever the same, and some are shorter than others. Each soul has lessons that they have to learn, and once they have mastered them, they 'evolve'. Don't ask me what I think they evolve into, since I'm not there yet, I have no idea. I believe part of this process is that in each life, you are being challenged to not repeat the mistakes of the previous life. Sometimes, maybe you are being punished for something horrible that you did in the last life. Either way, the soul remembers, but you cannot tap that memory while you are in physical form. This all leads to my current belief in myself: In a previous incarnation, as a woman, I either did something really horrible to one or more men because I was incapable of understanding their point of view or maybe I wasted my life because I thought it would be so much better to be a man. Either way, in this life, I am now being forced to learn how to live in a man's world, in a man's body, without losing myself. To me (and this is not a judgement on anyone else) HRT and/or SRS/GRS would be somewhere between a gross cop-out and playing God.

    In addition to that, I am who I am. I have found a wonderful person who accepts me for who I am both inside and outside. Any plans about changing who I am physically would naturally affect her, so it is not my decision alone. That being said, I am a woman. I don't care what my physical body looks like, what my birth certificate says, what anybody else says, by my standards of being a woman that's what I am. Because to me, the only thing that matters in the end is what is inside a person. That is where your soul resides; the rest is just a physical vehicle that allows you to interact with this world, and thus learn and grow.

    Love,

    Brandy Marie Devereaux
    Courage, sacrifice, determination, commitment, toughness, heart, talent, guts. That's what little girls are made of; the hell with sugar and spice.

  14. #14
    Silver Member Priscilla1018's Avatar
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    Wow ,after reading all of the posts, I'm not sure I fit in. I don't look feminine,I don't act feminine and I certainly don't go out dressed.Then there is the large amount of testosterone that comes through in some of my posts,as Dana pointed out a few days ago.I am happy spending time with the ladys and joining in their conversations;I understand more than the typical man.I am also comfortable with the guys.My Priscilla side loves to paint,to arrange flowers.to garden,to cook,and to be creative in general.
    I guess I am still confused even though I have been doing this for 46 years.
    I still don't know where I fit in.

    Love and Hugs,
    Priscilla
    Love and Hugs,
    Priscilla

  15. #15
    Phoebe Diana
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brandy_Marie
    Kew,

    Thanks for this one. I am sorry, folks, but this one might be long.

    Many of the posts already have hit on some of my feelings, but no one post has completely summarized it.

    Brandy Marie Devereaux
    My goodness, Brandy, I could have written about 90% of that post myself. Down to the nipples and the reincarnation (though I have not really speculated about any of my past lives). That's actually a little freaky.

    The only difference worth mentioning (and it's not small) is that I never thought (or think) of myself as a woman in a man's body. Just as a bit strange. I have never focused any of my issues down to being specifically about gender (though I would always concede that was a part).

    I'm not sure that makes sense, so I'll try to put it another way. If I were granted any wish, it would only fleetingly cross my mind to choose to be female. What I *would* choose is to be a shape-changer, and then gender differences are only the beginning of what I would explore. There's a whole lot of *other* out there, and I would like to know it all.

    On the original question of female feelings, thoughts, and desires, the only one that I would ever specifically put my finger on is that I dearly wanted to have borne one of my children.

    Phoebe

  16. #16
    Senior Member cindybarnes's Avatar
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    Smile

    What lurks under the surface that makes me feel feminine when dressed?
    For me, the feminine feeling kicks in just after starting my eye makeup, and increases with each step. Choosing earings, trying to match the rest of my makeup with what I plan to wear, How to wear my 'hair" all the things GG's do any time they are trying to present their most feminine image for a night out.
    But before all that,, underneath the surface,,, is the fact that Im not what one would call a handsome male,, not a self put down, but I can look in the mirror after getting all fixed up and be a lot happier with what I see than I can looking at the plain old guy in the same mirror.
    Its like answering the question "what would I have looked like if born a girl?" and being happy with the visual answer. Im realistic about it all tho, knowing Im too large to easily pass while out,, large hands,, low voice, lots of other flaws I will keep to myself LOL
    When I dress casualy at home, maybe capri's and a top or something its not that ultra feminine feeling but for me its comfort in knowing Im still expressing my girl side without all the fuss.
    One thing I had to assure my wife of is the fact that no matter how short my skirt, or high my heels are , Im not dressing to attract anyone especially other males. Thats not the kind of feminine feeling I get from this.
    Ok, thats my condensed answer to a pretty deep question :-)
    Cindy

  17. #17
    Member Katiegirl's Avatar
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    As others have said this is a very difficult question, I suppose in many respects I have many what would be considered female traits.

    Of melissacd's list I suppose I have the following

    - being sensitive to the needs of others
    - being a good listener
    - being supportive
    - being intuitive
    - being soft, yet assertive
    - creating warmth and comfort for those around you
    - being caring and compassionate
    - having a sense of style
    - avoiding vulgarity as a communication style
    - carrying yourself with grace

    On a one to one basis I find I can't express my inner feelings - a true male trait but on forums like this one I find it much easier to express things.

    I suppose my other male traits would be aggressive driving and not liking to wait for anything.

    Do I feel different when dressed, not really just that I feel more my true self, when I am in male cloths I have to put on a front

    I have always felt different from my 3 brothers and I find it easier to have friends who are women rather than men as I have more in common with them.



    Mind of a Woman, Body of a Man, life is a Bitch

  18. #18
    Senorita Member Sigrid's Avatar
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    I really only began to really explore my fem side just a few weeks ago. I started thinking of this very question over the last few days. What I had realized is that no matter what thoughts or feelings I perceive as feminine, they are in the end just that; what I as a man might imagine them to be like. I'd never, ever really know if the feelings were genuinely female.

    Having said that, something very different and unexpected has occurred since I began to explore my feminine side over these last few weeks. Up till then, I thought of my CD'ing as nothing much more than a man playing dress-up for a few hours - often culminating in self gratification, instantly followed by a complete lack of interest in being dressed. This, I've learned on this forum, is quite common among some crossdressers.

    But, since I started to let Sigrid emerge, the sexual compulsion has dropped off considerably. In fact I've only felt the desire to touch myself once since I first saw Sigrid in the mirror a couple weeks ago. And afterwards, I still had every desire to remain dressed as Sigrid. That one experience was quite remarkable too - While standing at the mirror looking at Sigrid it was as if Sigrid was trying to please the male side. It was so much more like lovemaking than I may have ever experienced. If that was in fact a genuine female feeling, then I want to be a woman. Whew! Excuse me, I think I need to go get dressed up now.

    blasted thread - Damn you Kew!

    ~Sigrid
    Last edited by Sigrid; 04-28-2005 at 12:46 AM.

    I'll take the pink one.
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  19. #19
    Member Elysia's Avatar
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    male and female persona in everyone

    Great thread…

    I believe there’s both a male and female persona in everyone. In most people one of the two is dominant but the relative balance varies from person to person.

    Carl Jung describes these as the anima and the animus. I find Carl Jung’s theory fascinating but I’ll not go on about it. But if anybody is interested in Jung’s theory and wants to talk about, please let me know ‘cause I’m dying to discuss it… wrote a little about it here.

    Anyway… I think I’m someone with a balance closer to equal that most.

    I’m also reacting to the environment I grew up in. It included a particularly rigid and harsh concept of what a man should be like. In my family a man was supposed to be an emotionless machine. As a boy, cross-dressing was, in part, an act of defiance, though I always concealed it. Women clothes were like talismans that kept me from a dismal abyss.

    I do believe society is responsible for pushing people into extreme and unnatural gender stereotypes. I agree with ChristineRenee.

    Quote Originally Posted by ChristineRenee
    Men, in my opinion, have been brutally conditioned by society for decades...even centuries! So much so in fact, that half of our humanity as a human being has been socially conditioned right out of us since childhood. Men really do have the capacity to nurture, to feel emotionally, and freely express that to others, and to laugh and cry at the same time and know the reason for it. We are taught at a very early age in life to not be that way.
    I think this got particularly bad after the beginning of the Industrial Revolution. It was then that human beings really started being treated like cogs in a machine. The age of Imperialism and all the wars that came out of that also encouraged the brutalization of the human spirit. By the time I came along men didn’t cry they just killed and Charlemagne was only a fairytale.

    Still, as longs as there are women there’s hope for men and things might be changing.

    Quote Originally Posted by melissacd
    Recently, cultural norms have made it acceptable for women to express a very broad range of feminine and masculine characteristics. Men, however, are culturally locked within their masculine roles. Some, in the transgendered communities are starting to break through this barrier, however, I suspect it will be some time before that wall is knocked down.
    Melissa makes a good point. Though I agree it will take some time before current barriers are broken, it’s worth noting that historically speaking the change in cultural norms for women is very recent and that it came about because women fought very hard to bring it about, and they’re still working hard to reach equality. It’s not possible for one group to break out of a polarizing situation without also releasing their opposite number. One of the best ways to liberate ourselves is to continue to strongly support women’s rights.

    I digress… I tend to do that. Sorry… what was the topic?

    Oh yes.

    Female feelings, female thoughts, female desires? I aspire to liberate them in my life and everyone elses too. Maybe someday feminine feelings, etc. won’t be thought of as the exclusive prerogative of women and people will wear pretty clothes when they feel like being pretty. You never know, stranger things have happened.
    Warm Regards,
    Elysia

  20. #20
    Pixie Hollow's Vixen Katie Ashe's Avatar
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    Thumbs up

    Brandy, dear, your book should hit the best sellers list shortly , After reading more into the Q, I agree with many of you. It is hard to put feeling into words for me, I think you gals summed alot up for me though. Can I get a group hug

    Katie
    DK Productions LLC, Giving back to the Rainbow Community. Need a DJ, Every Song Has a Story, We Make The Memory

  21. #21
    Before/after Stephenie's Avatar
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    i have always felt that something was missing in me. i now believe that the female part of me was so repressed that I did not know it was there. She has tried to let me know she is there and now that I am free to start to share this with my wife and start to express this part of me I feel more whole.

    I seem to feel more emotional and sensitive while dressed (not much yet, just panties all the time, more as the wife gets comfortable with this) I feel that it's ok to talk to her about girly things with out her thinking it strange. Though she probably would not have before she knew. but i always felt that people might see what was in me so I held it all back. I am slowly trying to make the two parts of me into one. though I like both parts now the I have Stephenie to help.

    Kind of makes it sound like a split personalty but I know that it's just different parts of me.

  22. #22
    GypsyKaren
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    I guess it's a calmness and inner peace that I allow myself to feel. It's just difficult to describe or put into words.
    GypsyKaren

  23. #23
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    Thank you, Kew.

    This is an affirming thread, and it is not easily answered. I assume you ask b/c you are trying to understand your sweetie better. Hope this helps.
    There are many superficial things that make me Feel feminine. Tonight, I put my hair in pig tails, for instance, and I feel fabulous! So, clothing, makeup, breastforms, etc. make me Feel feminine.
    But, there's an incredible difference between Feeling and Being.
    Things make me Feel feminine. They don't make me female.
    What makes me female is everything inside me that screams, "I can't stand being in this skin any longer pretending to be a man!" It's waking up on a Monday morning depressed b/c I have to behave according to that thing between my legs again even though it is not who I am. It's knowing that my character does not match my physical being while also knowing that I need to suppress my true Self to satisfy others who haven't the capacity to understand me. It's knowing that I can't wait to begin HRT in July. (I'm planning to start on the 4th!) It's feeling inner peace, joy, and relief when I am able to be Chrissy outwardly and openly.
    This summer, I plan to come out more in public and allow Chrissy to breathe. Next summer, I'm planning FFM surgery. In the Fall of '06, I plan to go full time. Feeling feminine isn't my goal so much as Being my true self 24/7. Of course, the former will result from the latter.
    Hugs,
    Chrissy

  24. #24
    Member Elysia's Avatar
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    Apr 2005
    Location
    US, Illinois
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    140

    A kinder gentler me

    Stefanie, I can really relate to what you wrote.

    Quote Originally Posted by stefanie
    Its strange, when i wear really girly panties, let's say, under my drab clothes, I can feel myself switching back and forth in my thoughts, communication and presentation. Even my gestures are more gentle or mixed....actually its been very refreshing..... I am doing this more often. I think its been a helpful reminder to not be so black and white and to break from years of traditional social development.


    There are positive qualities which I associate with femininity but which I’ve felt I could not express with my male mask. I created a female mask (Elysia) so that I could express them. These are qualities that I have always associated with femininity. I’ve always believed that society associated these qualities with femininity and forbade men to express them, but recently it has occurred to me that perhaps my inherited concepts of what is masculine and what is feminine have been more sharply defined than they ever needed to be.

    As I have experimented with integrating approaches that I think of as ‘coming from my Elysia perspective’ into my daily life—often aided by the gentle reminder that panties provide; they’re like a hidden talisman that keeps me in touch with my Elysia perspective—I’ve found that I’m a more complete person. I don’t think anyone is reacting to these changes by thinking of me as, in Governor Schwarzenegger’s words, “a girly man.” Don’t get me wrong, I would not expect a positive response if people knew just how I’ve arrived at this place in my evolution—no doubt ‘girly man’ would not be the worst thing I’d be called—but, in general, I’d say the world has responded very positively to the kinder, gentler me.
    Warm Regards,
    Elysia

  25. #25
    Gold Member DonnaT's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Northern Virginia
    Posts
    6,608
    Quote Originally Posted by KewTnCurvy
    So below the surface, what lurks that makes you feel female? What aspects of your person, beyond the obvious, make you feel female, make others' perceive you as female?
    Honestly, nothing. I don't feel female at all.

    I haven't been out in public dressed yet, so couldn't say if anyone else would perceive me as female, other than how I look above the neck, or below the knees

    I guess I'll find out soon enough when I go out in Vegas. But I doubt anyone will perceive me to be female. Not going to stop me though
    DonnaT

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