Child Abused CDs

[Natasha Anne]

I found an online link http://members.aol.com/gnlnews/deut22v5.htmlNo need for Word

[Phoebe Diana]

But I don't have any memory of it, or much else from before about 3rd grade.

All I know is that when I was a teenager, my father asking my, very nervously, if I remembered what happened the time he found me in a man's motel room. (My grandfather was the manager of the motel, so I had just been playing around on the grounds unsupervised.) All I could say was no, cause I didn't.

He didn't really enlighten me, either, except to apologize for not having kept a better eye on me, and for making me promise not to tell. (He said he was afraid my grandfather would kill the man if I said anything.) And that's the only time he ever said anything about it.

It was such a bizarre, out of nowhere conversation, that I sometimes wonder if I didn't dream it...but I don't think so. Kind of the opposite of those of you who said you came to enjoy it, I've always thought that men are icky.

Doesn't have a thing to do with my dressing--that didn't start until much later.

Phoebe

[paulaN]

nope never abused I just like to be girly all on my own.

[trinity24]

I had a very good childhood - and I strongly believe crossdressing is a genetic trait - i.e. we've been the way we are since we were born. It's very similar to homosexuality in that respect.

[Darlene.]

Hey Ladies,
I was only eleven years old when I was sodomized by three older guys (15-19 years old) It was pretty scary and I didn't like it at first, I guess you can call it rape, but I didn't know any better at the time so I just went along with it because I was scared. This went on for about a year, every time they could catch me I got screwed. To make a long story short, I eventually began to like it.
Ricki

Abuse is a very deep subject, and can happen to a person without their knowledge.

The abuse… that is not acknowledged… in this situation; is that you did not have a place where you felt safe to tell others about this situation. You had no place to turn to that you felt confident that this action would stop, and that is what set you up to be a repeat and willing victim of rape. Your parents failed to provide that for you.

Repeated abuse does not happen when that is in place. There are certain conditions that have to be in place for that to happen. And sexual abuse can not repeatedly occur with out (the victim) first having been (at least) emotionally, and likely physically abused.

Abuse of any kind is the result of the abuser not being able to get their needs met in a healthy manner and uses you as a pawn to meet those un-met needs.

During my childhood I received beatings regularly from my father (two and three times a week) that were watched by my mother, and continued until she received her sexual climax. I did not understand why it happened until I was 42 years of age.

I have suspected that this has had something to do with my cross-dressing as I was not treated the way I should have been for who and what I was born to be. But I can not prove that. The author of this thread was treated like he was a girl for at least one year of his life, and that had to have some effect on who and what he is today. And may well be why it was important for him to have made the best of those bad situations. One needs to survive.

I suspect there are more of us who have been abused than realize it. In fact I know there are. Some of them I have been able to peg, by the way they respond in their posts. There are some on every CD forum that I am a member of.

Those who have been abused and realize it, have a better chance of having a better life than those who never find out. And the sooner they find out the better their chance of succeeding.

Love Darlene.

[Vivian Best]

I have to say that I was NEVER sexually abused, nothing even close. On the other hand my mother was a task master and her way of controlling was a good ole spanking. As a child, I would have described her spankings as border line physical abuse. Mental abuse is another thing! Not only from mother but my uncle and grandmother. At the time it was horrible but now I don't mind, mother and grandmother told me many many times I should have been a girl and my uncle called me a girl. As a preteen, that went very deep.

However, I do not believe that promoted my crossdressing because I was already CDing even that early in life.

Vivian

[Matthew]

Hi,
I suffered from severe emotional abuse (from a step-parent) from around age 10 to 16, and relatively mild emotional neglect in the years that followed. I wonder....

Sincerely,

Matthew

[Mia lynn]

I was never sexually abused but I was beaten by a more than slightly crazy nun when I went to catholic school. She really hated men I think and really took it out on the boys in her class. I was her favorite target for some reason, I was only 7 at the time. I sometimes wonder that's the reason why I like dressing up as a girl. There's more to the story but I guess that enough of true confessions for now.
Mia lynn

[LindaLeeColby]

My father, career Navy, was a drunk and our abuse always came when he began drinking. Mostly it was beatings. I've always considered myself fortunate in some ways because I got even one night at a very young age (eight or so) and have carried that night with me ever since. Mom had managed to lock him out of the house in one of his tirades although we knew he was capable of breaking the door down and that scared me.

I remember being more fearful of mom getting hurt than me so I took up an old cast iron skillet to stand guard on the wide arm of a chair near the door. Dad managed to knock the door open and I managed to swing that skillet at just the right time catching him full in the face. He was in the hospital for nearly four days with a fractured jaw, broken nose and the loss of a couple of teeth.

We lived in Naval housing then and the Shore Patrol officer told mom he was going to list it as a fall and did. Dad was too drunk to know what really happened. Mom left him shortly after that and I didn't see him again till I was in my early twenties. He'd had a heart attack and wanted to get back together again. We talked a little but I couldn't see him in my life after so long and told him so as kindly as I could. I also told him I was the one that hit him that night.

It was great therapy.

Hugs
Linda Lee

[Sweet Susan]

Ifeel you were abused the guilt you admitt is abuse, you can't FEEL GUILT unless you are bought into question ? If you are bought into Question then Judgements or Assumpyions are made ? Then you are treated with what is CONSIDED appropiate by the Questioner's ?
There for in my eyes you are ABUSED

Huh? I didn't quite follow all of that, but that's okay.

Anyway, I was sexually abused when I was 12. I started crossdressing when I was eleven, so there was obviously no connection. Or wasn't there? Is it not possible that my desires to dress like a girl put my 12 year-old self in the position to be seduced and then molested by a 50 plus year-old man? And is it also not possible that the relationship that spawned from that molestation into a weekly routine that lasted for years developed because when under him I felt more feminine than when not? I don't know. I just know that although I was constantly filled with self-loathing and swore to never return, I would return to him again and again, and it didn't seem to have anything to do with crossdressing, though that didn't seem to hurt it, either.