Cross dressing theories

[Ayame]

There are many theories on why people cross dress. What are some theories that you believe may be possible for causing you to cross dress or do you have your own you wish to share? This is not a thread to bash peoples views or theories for it is very likely there is more than one reason for different people cross dressing.

I have two different ones.

The first one has to do with dominance and submissiveness. I've noticed two different types of cross dressers who fit into this category. One type is the ones who wish to be under someone else's control who want to do acts for others such as cooking and cleaning. The other type is the ones who hold some of their masculine values and do not wish to be submissive.
Now I feel that the submissive cross dresser is naturally a submissive person through DNA. They cross dress for one of two reasons. The first is just to feel less dominant by doing things that they look at as not masculine. The second is they feel women are better than men so they feel the need to impersonate them.
Now for the dominant cross dresser I feel their DNA wants them to always be the best. So I feel that with how modern society is both men and women have dominant qualities. They feel the need to embrace both qualities to feel as if they have it all.

Now another theory I believe is I think that o.c.d. may have a very strong link to cross dressing. For an example people who have o.c.d. with washing their hands start off washing their hands because they are scared of germs but before they know it they wash their hands all the time with out even thinking of germs. Kind of like how most cross dressers start out doing it for a sexual thrill then later just cross dressing full time or more often and not so much for the sexual aspect.

Now share some of your possible theories!

[battybattybats]

Interesting ideas.

But I alternate between dominant and submissive in both my male and female aspects.

I don't have OCD or anything like it apparently either.

so for myself I don't think these theories apply (though they may to others! More than one cause may be needed to explain the crossdressing phenomena).

I saw a tv program discussing sex-differences in brain structure. The average female brain is different to the average male brain.

However the difference between any two random male individuals or two female ones are going to be greater than the difference between the average male and the average female with many males having more female brains than the average female and with many females having more male brains than the average male.

Studies on the brains of Transexuals have found female brain structure in them.

So I think crossdressers have inbetween brains. Not as female than transexuals but much more female than the averagre male.

[vikki2020]

Really don't care about the psycho-mumbo-jumbo. There is something there in all of us,usually recognized from an early age,that wants to identify with the oppesette sex. Why? Who knows! A nice scientific explanation might make you feel better about it,but bottom line: If it makes you happy,don"t fight the feeling.Everybody has a big bad wolf inside of them, and the best thing is to make friends with the wolf--and let him out once in a while!

[docrobbysherry]

The first one has to do with dominance and submissiveness. I've noticed two different types of cross dressers who fit into this category. One type is the ones who wish to be under someone else's control who want to do acts for others such as cooking and cleaning. The other type is the ones who hold some of their masculine values and do not wish to be submissive.
Now share some of your possible theories!

I don't know lolita. Your theory mite apply to others, but not me. I had a REALLY difficult time in the Army. Because I didn't like taking or giving orders!

The following is more a question than a theory:
Taking myself as an example, is it possible many CDs r "odd ducks"? I certainly am. I only recently started CDing. But I've always kind of gone my own way, done my own thing, my whole life. Not fitting into any clear cut catagory along the way.

Is it possible that that is NOT uncommon among CDs?

[emmicd]

I believe the experiences of each crossdresser is unique and similar in many ways.

I can't speak for other crossdressers but I believe my desire to crossdress started as a young boy and it has never really let up though it had lied dormant for many years.

I believe most crossdressers are normal in all respects and very responsible and most are married and have children.

My crossdressing just seemed normal and just a secret part of my childhood and adulthood.

I am very comfortable as a male and am very happy in my life. I am very fortunate to have a wife and a beautiful family. My wife and children mean everything to me.

I am very secretive with my crossdressing and though I don't really reveal that side of my life to others I feel it is very much an integral part of me and I feel I can not just walk away from it. I have tried many times but have been able to accept it and after all do enjoy the feel of a dress every now and then. I do not always have to wear a suit and tie. However I will only wear a dress in secrecy. I am not a brave crossdresser. I am a very meek crossdresser.

[LilSissyStevie]

The devil makes me do it!

[Bernadina]

Its just part of the natural order of things. In spite of the artificial standards imposed by societies.

We are after all part male and part female. There is no choice in having a male and female aspect. Unless of course you were conceived by only one parent.

Its just that the degree which our male and female parts effects our lives, varies from one person to the next.

Embrace who and what you are and remember its really quite normal.

[MarinaTwelve200]

Several come to mind.

"Escapisim"---Some of us dress to "escape" our "real selves", "manhood obligations " or both. This is found to releive stress and is very relaxing

"Fem siders"---Some of us feel we have "a woman inside" and dress to "come home", so to speak---the inverse of the escapist above, but both use dressing to acheive their goal.

Transsexulisim---Some men have "female brains" and actually feel that they are "women trapped in men's bodies" and dress to express their real selves.

Fetishists---Some dress because the clothes turn them on sexually.

Humiliation S/M---Some dress or like to be dressed as a form of SM, tied to humiliation or submission

Thrill seekers---Some dress for the "thrill" of breaking a "brain taboo"--that is the brain produces a big "high" when you cross some of its "lines" or "barriers"--"self preservation", for example--The high soldiers or extreme atheletes get when they risk their lives and get away with it. Crossing identy lines in the brain will do the same thing, only safer.

Taboo Tripping---also produces a high when SOCIAL bariers are broken--and one gets away with it.


Most CDers usually have one main cause and might feel the influences of one or more of the others.

[yms]

What if....

The writer Ayne Rand said that when you reach a logical contradiction, you have to go back and re-evaluate your original premise because a contradiction cannot exist in nature.

What if the medical and psychological assumptions about gender are inherently wrong, that gender never was an either-or condition. After all, those premises were established centuries ago.

Then the conclusions we come to about men and women being so different are basically wrong. Personally, based on the women I've known in my life, men and women have much more in common than they do different.

If the original assumptions are wrong, then science is coming up with the right answers to the wrong questions. Their data is correct, but they are applying the data incorrectly.

[Vicky_Scot]

IMO I think we have no choice in the matter. It is predetermined in the womb.

[satin_luva]

I can photographically remember when I first cross-dressed.

It was at my step mothers old unit. Everone had finished dinner and I was going to the toilet. To get to the toilet you had to go through the laundry and as I was walking through there, I noticed my stepmums sexy bra resting inside the washing basket. I can't remember what I was thinking at the time but I think I was so intrigued by what it would fell like on me. So I picked the bra up, went into the toilet, took my shirt off and slowly put it on. It felt really different and nice I guess.
I ended up flogging it from her and a few other things and that was where it all started.

I believe it's pre-determined in the womb, too. But you can't just randomly decide to get into it (CDing). Something has to guide you there. My theory with my case is that I was exposed to a lot of sexualised women wearing erotic lingerie and 'casual' clothing on TV and some of it in real life. And when I discovered satin and other lovely fabrics, my my new future hobby was set.

[MarciManseau]

I'm neither domme or sub, and no sign of OCD. For me, I dress so that the outside matches the inside, so my appearance to others matches how I feel about myself.

I'm TS but I don't feel any great need for a sex change. I've been full time for 7 years (in May), and I don't have any problems that surgery would fix, and I doubt I could afford it.

Besides, Julie and I both like my current "configuration"

Hugs, Marci

[StephanieH]

I firmly believe I was born with a few wires mixed up. I like being a guy, but I discovered very early on that I was drawn, or compelled, or whatever you want to call it, to feminine or girly things - way before I knew what sex was.

When I was a kid, I liked playing with traditionally girl's toys, I watched "girl's" cartoons and read "girl's" comic books. Looking back at the old photos, geez, I looked and stood around like a girl when I was a kid - my wife chuckles about it too everytime I show her another discovered old photo of me when I was a kid.

Only possible bizarre theory I have, and this is a reach, but my mother miscarried a girl baby the year before I was born. It was a late miscarraige, something like seven months I believe. My mother always lamented that loss and she spoke about her "lost girl" many times - it really upset her. Mom's gone now, but I believe I may have gotten some of that lost sister's hormones or something.

Take care!

[kym]

I'm like several others here, I feel that I was born this way. My mother and her family always wanted a little girl to dress up and such and the got me instead. According to my mother, her mother had me in lacy tights and nightgowns from a very early age and saw no problem with it as I seemed to act more "natural and outgoing" that way.

[Steveo]

i beleave yvonne is bang on the target, my 2 pence worth is that everlution isnt just male or female, but all the spectrum, from pure bull dog male to very girly girl, (im sorry i can't think of an apropeate female equevalent, but you get the jist, it is society that demands how we act, thus male bull dog, and women pretty and effemanate, i suppose you could see their point (there has to be rules) but as a minority group in the huge spectrum of gender we feel ill at ease for not being taken for what we are, just a group of indeviduals on the gender spectrum who for the most part mean no harm to anyone and would like just to be accepted for what we are, i am sorry in advance if i have affended anyone.

[jaina]

No real theories, but of all the crossdressers and TG people I've met or counselled, only 2 were late onset cases. all the others were cases where it surfaced early in life (usually in the 1st 4-5 years), even if it was supressed until later.

[carhill2mn]

As usual, when trying to explain a situation/condition/whatever that is as complex as this one, it is unlikely (impossible ?) to find one or two theories that will "fit all". I happen to believe that for most of us, the desire/need to CD is a result of how our brains formed before we were born.
I do not feel dominant or submissive when presenting as a woman. I just know that I enjoy it.

[kristen6]

for me i started when i was 4or5 yrs old to me its a hormonal inbalance not to say i'm not a man but its more than a feeling to cd and i don't think its just mental.
it has to be a phycail thiing that were all bron with .

i've qiut doing this and come back to it every time and i'm not thinkiing of it. i just see something in the store i've got to have and well that skrit want go with any of my guy clothes so next thing you know i'm back in it again (and staing).

althought those other idea sound good they sound more like an excuse not what you know is ture.

[wishonastar]

I like to think of it as a form of diversity. The most intelligent people will get bored with the same old every day every week. One needs a diversion, also some of us are not born with a fixed, “gender assignment” so we are more diverse in that respect as well.

Then again WHO CARES? Why analyze it? It exists and trying the find the reason why will gust give you a headache. It is the screwed up society with so called experts that have nothing better to do than to find out why some people are “different”.

[Ruth]

I think the fact that there is no generally accepted theory of CDing "out there" indicates that it's a tough one. Either the root cause is very difficult to find, or there are very many different paths to CDing, and each of us may have one or more factors steering us towards CDing.
Wanting to know is natural, but when it comes down to it, we are going to want to do it anyway, however much or little we understand it.
I agree with those who say that CDing, or at least the desire to CD, was with them from an early age. I would say under 5 in my case. Probably as soon as I got the idea of the two genders sorted out in my mind, I knew I wanted to partake of both!

[MarinaTwelve200]

Well yes, I think some of us are born that way. This is especially true of the transsexuals and many "fem sider" CDs. But I think in many OTHER cases the benifits of CD are "DISCOVERED".-----Like the good feeling one has the first time one is dressed---for reasons of curiosity, by force or for a joke or school skit, for examples.
It might just be that one may get off on being humiliated, be "sensitive" to the fabrics or have a fetish that CDing directly maximizes. One might discover the RUSH from violating a social taboo or a brain barrier, and getting away with it, etc. This stuff is usually discovered----and develops into a habbit as one may not know of anything else that feels so good.

Of course one may not know WHY or what is going on at the time, especially if the trigger event happens in childhood, and whether or not the CD event "takes" would depend upon the personality and experiences of the person.----It may be only later in life, or ever,will one derive the element that makes CD exiting for him, but by then it is a well entrenched habbit.

[angelfire]

Now another theory I believe is I think that o.c.d. may have a very strong link to cross dressing. For an example people who have o.c.d. with washing their hands start off washing their hands because they are scared of germs but before they know it they wash their hands all the time with out even thinking of germs. Kind of like how most cross dressers start out doing it for a sexual thrill then later just cross dressing full time or more often and not so much for the sexual aspect.

This is personally, how I feel about my crossdressing. I have very little control over the impulses sometimes, and just feel an urge to do it.

[Nicki B]

Now I feel that the submissive cross dresser is naturally a submissive person through DNA. They cross dress for one of two reasons. The first is just to feel less dominant by doing things that they look at as not masculine. The second is they feel women are better than men so they feel the need to impersonate them.

You don't think that perhaps some people like to be 'made' to cd because it takes away some of the guilt they feel about themselves and their desire?

Taking myself as an example, is it possible many CDs r "odd ducks"? I certainly am. I only recently started CDing. But I've always kind of gone my own way, done my own thing, my whole life. Not fitting into any clear cut catagory along the way.

Is it possible that that is NOT uncommon among CDs?

Is it possible that that's a symptom of a difference, not the cause?


Would anyone admit to being 'normal', here?

[Nadia-Maria]

Not trying to generalize after my own experience, but I think to be somewhat representative of what quite a few CDers are. In any case I don't fit well any of dominance and ocd theories.


I believe to have identified as a child as partly male AND as partly female.

I know to have been a rather standard boy with prominent masculine features (mind and body), although together with a few more feminine characteristics.

For several various reasons, I had to my mother a very strong relationship from birth, so that my mother exerted a considerable influence over me as a baby and as a child. I wished then I would be born a girl.
My mother held men not in high esteem, and suffered to endure too strong a man as husband so that she was rather ambivalent to him. Nevertheless he was a good person, and a good father as well, honest, right and very hard working, but too much controlling and sometimes abusive due to his violent temper.
I think, very early in life, I preferred to identify, especially in my fantasy, to the female figure of my loved mother whose I shared most temperamental traits, and tried later to escape for some time the standard life of a man.

In the whole process it is as if I had been from birth partly male AND partly female.
Now I have the "double sex-nationality". In any case I have both clothing for life !

Kisses

Nadia

[Carly D.]

If you're asking me what I blame for me dressing up, I guess it would be two things.. first my mom for wearing pantyhose.. and second, I blame myself for getting sick in grade school and then again when I was a junior in high school.. and getting bored enough to rummage through her clothes and find pantyhose.. and try them on.. and get turned on by the feeling. the feeling that pantyhose feel but also the feeling of the rush of excitement that I'm doing something that isn't accepted or wouldn't be accepted..