What Would You Call Me?

[CaptLex]

Went to the therapist today and (using the HBSOC) he explained to me why a name change is important in the transitioning process. I understand that a change of name shows a serious commitment to transitioning, but I still think I should be able to call myself whatever I want without people doubting that I am who I say I am.

As many of you know, I have not changed my name legally. I have a female first name which I no longer use in everyday interactions, but I do have to use for legal ones (and which I've kept for sentimental reasons). And my middle name is a slightly longer version of "Lex" - considered a female name in this country, but it's actually gender-neutral in some cultures (like my parents').

Anyway, I've been giving it some thought and I honestly don't know what name(s) I would choose if I were to change it. I would keep some form of "Lex", but other than that, there are no particular names that I feel define me.

Maybe I'll just change my first name to "Capt".

So, I'm asking you guys (and girls) that know me . . . if you were to give me a name, what would it be and why? Please note, the why is important. This is mostly for fun, but I would like serious answers, please.

Any takers?

[Kieron Andrew]

I would legally change your first name to Lex, dropping ur female name, or having a middle initial of M which signifies the female name but isnt actually it Just Mr Lex M M_____, why? its male, its you and i would be utterly confused if you started changing names now lol...and you are still remembering 'her' for the sentimental reasons

oh and i know the HBSOC rules suck in some part, but he does have a point...it will allow you to jump through more transitioning hoops

[CaptLex]

I would legally change your first name to Lex, dropping ur female name, or having a middle initial of M which signifies the female name but isnt actually it Just Mr Lex M M_____, why? its male, its you and i would be utterly confused if you started changing names now lol...and you are still remembering 'her' for the sentimental reasons

So you're saying, just plain "Lex M" (no actual middle name, just an initial)?

oh and i know the HBSOC rules suck in some part, but he does have a point...it will allow you to jump through more transitioning hoops

Yeah that's what he said - but I'm a rebel.

[Kieron Andrew]

So you're saying, just plain "Lex M" (no actual middle name, just an initial)?

yup...thats exactly what im saying, no one says you actually have to have a middle name, but why you cant have an initial that signifies something that only you really know???, lots of people do that

Yeah that's what he said - but I'm a rebel.

you aint lying dude!!

[ZenFrost]

First name Captain, middle name Lex, last name Sparrow?

You know, you really should legally change your name to 'Captain'... that's what I always call you anyway.

[Kieron Andrew]

Nah Zen....it should be Captain Lex Depp or Captain Lex Izzard

[Syr_SwitchyGQ]

I think I'm with Kieron on the Lex M. M______ idea. Oh, and that would cure you of the initials "MAM"

[SirTrey]

I hate to be a follower....but I also agree with Lex M.....because it's who you identify as now...would only be a legal step in reaffirming who you already are....

[Cai]

I think it's dumb that you should have to change it at all. Your name is your name, male or female. I think I told you, Lex, when I was writing you that check, that I knew a cis-guy with your first name. Plus, your middle name is unisex, whether people believe it or not.

My recommendation would be, if you have to change anything, to just drop the first name or switch positions. If your old name is your middle name, there would be very few cases where people would have to know it.

[Kate Simmons]

Besides dreamy? Tough one Hon. Seriously, you should pick something easy to remember but difficult to forget, something that reflects your character.

[CaptLex]

First name Captain, middle name Lex, last name Sparrow?

Now why didn't I think of that?

You know, you really should legally change your name to 'Captain'... that's what I always call you anyway.

Careful, cutie . . . I may just have to smooch you for the third time today.

Um yeah, I think I have to . . .

or Captain Lex Izzard

Now I'm thinking some smart-arse will just shorten that to Capt Lizzard

Oh, and that would cure you of the initials "MAM"

Good point . . . my friend Phil says I should use my middle name as my first name and adopt a middle name that starts with an "R" so that my initials would be "ARM" . . . but the only R name that I like is Robespierre.

[CaptLex]

I hate to be a follower....but I also agree with Lex M.....because it's who you identify as now...would only be a legal step in reaffirming who you already are....

Trust me, dude, you're not a follower . . . and I do see your point . . . but I can't help feeling like this:

I think it's dumb that you should have to change it at all. Your name is your name, male or female.

I think I told you, Lex, when I was writing you that check, that I knew a cis-guy with your first name. Plus, your middle name is unisex, whether people believe it or not.

Yup, I remember we talked about that.

My recommendation would be, if you have to change anything, to just drop the first name or switch positions. If your old name is your middle name, there would be very few cases where people would have to know it.

I thought about that, actually . . . doesn't quite flow well in opposite places, though.

Besides dreamy?

Haha

Tough one Hon. Seriously, you should pick something easy to remember but difficult to forget, something that reflects your character.

I think that's what Lex is - at least to me.

So you guys think it should just be plain "Lex", not the whole name that "Lex" comes from? [SIZE="1"](Kieron, you already answered that and I know how Cai feels)[/SIZE]

[Shelly Preston]

Hi Lex

you shuold quote the man in black and ask them if the ever hear of a boy named Sue


Or just simply put Lex at the front and leave the rest

[Flameboy]

Before I changed my name to Dave (well, David), I had a unisex name that was the shortened form of my original name. I'd planned to stick with it - I'd made the change legal a number of years ago anyway. However, in mainstream British culture, my name was generally thought of as female until proven otherwise (despite being a unisex name in South Asian communities) and it really started to annoy me - and I'm pretty sure it hindered my passing - so when I came out as trans to my family, I asked my mum what I would have been called. The answer was David, so after thinking about it for a while and discussing it with various people, I decided the time was right to change my name.

Now, I fully agree that noone should have to change their name to suit other people; however I really do believe that by changing my name to one that is definitely male it's helped me pass when I'm introduced to someone new, especially if it might otherwise have been 50/50. You already know you're happy with the name Lex, so it would seem fairly sensible to change your name to that. I like Kieron's suggestion of just having M as your middle name - a bit like Harry S Truman, I believe, his S didn't stand for anything either. (Of course, I know absolutely nothing about Truman, so maybe he's not the sort of person you'd want anything in common with!)

Dave

[Kieron Andrew]

You already know you're happy with the name Lex, so it would seem fairly sensible to change your name to that. I like Kieron's suggestion of just having M as your middle name - a bit like Harry S Truman, I believe, his S didn't stand for anything either. (Of course, I know absolutely nothing about Truman, so maybe he's not the sort of person you'd want anything in common with!)

great analogy dude, Harry S Truman...good one

yes i did the same thing for the same reasons youve stated above, went from female to androgenous to male names, everyone kept telling me to keep my female name as it is also known to be a male name too, but i wanted to get away from it but still keeping some contact with it for my parents sake (big mistake keeping your name to suit others), so i changed it to an androgenous form of the name, but quickly realised my path was one of transition and the name was still getting me read as female ALOT, albeit an androgenous female, but still female never the less, then I realise I could still show respect to my parents by chosing a male first and second name retaining my initials of my former female name...hense how i came up with Kieron Andrew.....

Lex you could go by what ever you wanted legally but retain Lex when people ask what you want to be known as

[Tristan]

Have you considered taking two middle names? The second middle name no one would ever really need to know except social security. So maybe you could do Lex A(the name Lex comes from) M M ? I like the idea of going Captain Lex M hehe but that's cause I think of you as my Captain.

[ZenFrost]

Careful, cutie . . . I may just have to smooch you for the third time today.

Um yeah, I think I have to . . .

Really, I dare you to find a post where I didn't call you Captain or a derivative thereof.

[CaptLex]

Really, I dare you to find a post where I didn't call you Captain or a derivative thereof.

Check your inbox . . .

[CaptLex]

you shuold quote the man in black and ask them if the ever hear of a boy named Sue

Haha, I have a friend who already calls me "a boy named Sue".

I like Kieron's suggestion of just having M as your middle name - a bit like Harry S Truman, I believe, his S didn't stand for anything either.

You know, Dave, I was thinking about Harry S Truman earlier, when Kieron mentioned just using the initial. I wonder if he got tired of people asking him what the S was for?

Nice avatar, btw

Lex you could go by what ever you wanted legally but retain Lex when people ask what you want to be known as

That's pretty much the situation now.

Have you considered taking two middle names?

Yeah, actually . . . the thought occurred to me earlier today.

I like the idea of going Captain Lex M hehe but that's cause I think of you as my Captain.

I feel another smooch coming on . . .

[SirTrey]

Trust me, dude, you're not a follower . . . and I do see your point . . . but I can't help feeling like this:

Originally Posted by Cai
I think I told you, Lex, when I was writing you that check, that I knew a cis-guy with your first name. Plus, your middle name is unisex, whether people believe it or not.

Oh, I completely agree with you that you should NOT have to change your name...I was saying what I liked for you IF you wanted to.....but you do NOT have to change your name to be who you are, obviously.....and if you don't want to, no therapist, or anyone else should tell you that you should....I know you, and you most definitely are a dude, and very transitioned, no matter what your legal documents say....and Cai is right, I think your first name is less commonly a bio guy name, but some guys do have it...middle name, too, I agree that it can be unisex....if you do decide to change it, though, you could always just drop the last letter of your middle name and that is most definitely a male name....and kind of sexy, actually....

[CaptLex]

if you do decide to change it, though, you could always just drop the last letter of your middle name and that is most definitely a male name....and kind of sexy, actually....

Haha . . . actually I was also thinking of Alexei . . . like Russian royalty.

[ZenFrost]

Check your inbox . . .

Check yours.

Let me rephrase: Find a post where I specifically call you 'Lex.' Not CaptLex, not in conjunction with anything else, just 'Lex.'

[CaptLex]

Check yours.

Let me rephrase: Find a post where I specifically call you 'Lex.' Not CaptLex, not in conjunction with anything else, just 'Lex.'

Well, with that clarification, you're right . . . it's 'cause you love me, isn't it?

[ZenFrost]

Haha . . . actually I was also thinking of Alexei . . . like Russian royalty.

Alexei, Alexei, cannot run, cannot play. Cannot jump, cannot climb, must be careful all the time!

I think I've seen that movie one too many times.

[Charleen]

Captain, my Captain. For 2 years now I have known you as Lex. Apparently you tell people you would like to be called Lex. As far as I know, you like the name Lex. I assume that when you get together with people from here they call you Lex.The name above your avantar says Capt LEX.
Do you see where I'm going with this?
I like the idea of the "M". If anybody asks what it stands for, just tell them anything that they want!
Love ya, Lily