What's it like after the erotica phase?

[satin_luva]

I'm still at first base in my crossdressing: to dress for erotic gratification. I just want to know what reasons for dressing are statistically up for me next.

Lately I've been thinking of buying more casual, but still very arousing garments made out of sensual materials. Is that the first sign of dressing to primarily feel feminie? Does the erotic component completely dissolve or does it always remain as an important part of our secret passion?
I would love to romance a beautiful woman dressed, and share my hobby with her, but I don't really want to have a second life as a woman. I don't want to get involved in dressing out in public, doing the full make-up thing and preferring to be adressed as a woman or anything like that. But that's only what I'm saying now.

Catchup.

[docrobbysherry]

U don't say how long you've been dressing? It mite help others who have morphed their reasons for dressing over the years.

I've been dressing for 10 years and am over 60. It can still be a very erotic experience for me. Still my main reason to dress. In a recent thread, many life long CDs said it's still sexually exciting for them, too.

[satin_luva]

I've been doing it for 8-9 years.

[JoAnnDallas]

I started dressing when I was about 11. I am 60 now. Yes at first it was very erotic, but then too almost anything female is erotic to a 11 year old. LOL Back when I was younger, it was kinka like having sex with my fem self. Even today it is somewhat erotic, but now it just feels right. When I am dressed even if it is just panties and Satin PJ's, I feel compy, feels right, with a tingle of sexual excitement. I don't think the sexual excitement part ever goes away but I hardly get an errection while dressed anymore.
When I am dressed, I feel like a normal woman or what I think a normal woman feels like.
I think when you finially accept the woman inside of you as a real part of youself, the feelings you have when dressed changes.

[Roberta Llyan]

I think when you finially accept the woman inside of you as a real part of youself, the feelings you have when dressed changes.

I agree with this portion of your comment.

As for the "erotic" portion of it, erotic is in the mind and without the thought there is no erotic. So it is how and what you are thinking. That's why, in my opinion, if you dress to be female and are not wanting some stimulation for selfish reasons, the erotic is not there. Thoughts create and are behind our every action--everything--including eroticism.

[Kate Simmons]

Hard to say really. It depends a lot on the individual person and their motivation for doing this.

[Alice B]

to relax, for comfort and stress release and simply the enjoyment of feeling female.

[KeriB]

For me, it's so much more satisfying.. but then again I only recently discovered that my fears of CD'ing were associated with my potential desires of wanting to transition, which I am exporing now, in therapy and the real world. But what Salandra says is pretty much on point - depends lots on the individual and his (her) desires/wants/needs....

[jules3367]

For me, it's so much more satisfying.. but then again I only recently discovered that my fears of CD'ing were associated with my potential desires of wanting to transition, which I am exporing now, in therapy and the real world. But what Salandra says is pretty much on point - depends lots on the individual and his (her) desires/wants/needs....

OMG !

So thats whats happening to me at the moment, jeez i was scared i was going mad

[Emily Anderson]

I'm in my mid-forties, and I find it to be a mix really. Sometimes it's erotic, and sometimes it just feels right.

I think indeed that if you read through the threads here, and as Salandra said, there are many different motivations - which can evolve over time - and quite a few different courses of evolution. The only one thing which seems to be constant is that most (all?) don't ever completely give it up.

The important thing is to educate yourself about crossdressing, and let things take their course where you feel comfortable.

[Claire3]

I just take each day as it comes

[AmandaM]

If you concentrate on the erotic side, which is easy to do, you may mask other benefits or reasons for it. Q: Do you immediately go for the erotic/fetish feeling? If so, maybe purposely don't and see how you feel about it. An experiment.

[Angie G]

It's never been erotic for me I've alway just loved to dress so I don't know what would be next hun.
Angie

[Celeste]

Wow,I sure will miss the erotic part of it if it ever goes away.Theres just always something to throw in the mix to keep that spark alive.I certainly don't want that part dissolving.Like yourself, I will never transition and want to share this with a GG.

[SweetCaroline]

I've always been more or less conservative in dress (and I started dressing when I was only five years old). And there was a lot of eroticism involved in my teen years, that is still very much with me.

I don't know what you mean by, "erotic phase" since I believe we all approach being T-gendered differently. I suppose for me the "erotic phase" (and by that I mean being aroused by the simple act of wearing female clothes, jewelry, make-up,etc) ended when I started going out dressed.

You can't be aroused by dressing when you start going out as a girl. In turn, I gained a lot of other "phases". A social phase. A political/ activist phase. Even a spiritual phase. But I don't like to think of them as "phases", just new beginnings.

[Cristi]

What a few people KIND of mentioned here but never fully stated is that there are many different motivations for crossdressing. Instead of talking about it being one thing or another, people usually refer to it as a spectrum. Every person here is at their own unique place on the spectrum, somewhere between 'fetishistic transvestism' on one end and 'transgendered' on the other.

If for you it is 'only' an erotic thrill (more toward the 'fetish' end of the spectrum) there is no need to worry that you are going to end up wanting to transition.

On the other end of the scale, there are transgendered folk to whom crossdressing is only a part of the process, not an end in itself.

While it is possible that you are really transgendered and are hiding it even from yourself until you feel more comfortable, I don't think that it is really likely that people just magically TURN from crossdressers into trans people. Your goals and desires of what you want to get out of dressing may evolve, but that change would be like jumping onto a whole new set of tracks!

As for me, I've been dressing since I was very young (well less than 10) It was VERY erotic until my mid 20s, then settled into more of a 'comfort' thing. While I still find it exciting, it is not just about 'that feeling' any more. It really is hard to explain the difference.

[raleighbelle]

I have dressed to the extent that I could (which usually was not much) for as long as I can remember. For a long time it was very erotic in every aspect. Now there is an erotic component, but there is much more of the calm, comfortable feeling that I get when dressed that I do not feel otherwise. My personality changes and I am much happier, more easy-going, and calmer when dressed. I would bet my blood pressure is a lot better then too, but haven't checked it. It just feels right. I have never gone out in public though (at least not yet).

[LilSissyStevie]

What's it like after the erotica phase?

I don't know, but it sounds kinda boring.

[StayceeCD]

You can't be aroused by dressing when you start going out as a girl.

You've got that right! Who needs that unsightly bulge when you're trying to present in public as a female??

[Amy Hepker]

Peaceful and stimulating.

[lynnrichards]

Very often, dressing is still erotic for me. I'm 67 and have been dressing since about the age of 5. But, I agree with others that for the time I am out in public, the erotic feelings seem to vanish. When I return home, however, it will usually become erotic again.

[Deanna2]

Even when wearing femme gear becomes natural for you, you'll find there is still mystery and excitement.

[linnea]

I found this to be an interesting question because it made me reflect on what kinds of feelings I have had about dressing since I started. Of course, at first, because I was very young (7), I don't think that it was at all erotic. I was just curious about how I would look in women's clothing. It was fun. The excitement at that time was about having a secret dress-up identity--I guess.
When I got into junior high, dressing heightened the effects of my erotic fantasies about girls and sex. However, the greatest feeling that I had was related to my pleasure in looking and acting female. I just liked the look and the feel of women's clothing. I still do. I dressed then and I dress now for the same reasons: I love the feel and look of the clothing; I love expressing myself and enjoying life activities as a woman.
I've been doing this for over fifty years, and now that I am more comfortable going out en femme, I am enjoying it more than ever.

[jessielee]

dear Satinluva Catchup Girl,
while i don't dress to excite myself, it is undeniably exciting!
there's simply different levels to and diverse stimulations possible.
there are certainly easier ways to become aroused! so that's not primary for me. it is what feels natural and right and what i've missed out on for forty some years.
that being said, personally, the journey is as gratifying as the destnation!
i mean, anticipating, purchasing, applying, sliding, smoothing, brushing and primping is as wonderfully joyous and sexy to me as the slinking, sashaying and clicking!
it is a sensation i could never deny! sensuous, yessssss!
but more than than.
like something i could get used to as normal, everyday, non sexy life.
with special perky periods of sensuality every now and then, perhaps often, perhaps with dry spells!
just like life.
breezilly,
jessie

[Mollyanne]

Hi SL, for me the erotic phase has never ceased, and I am in my 60's and have been dressing since I was 12. I Love the feel of pantyhose on my shaved legs, the feel of my bra and the weight of my forms, the sensuous feeling(s) of my half slip on my legs, the snugness of my heels on my feet, the scent of my make-up and perfume. I guess what I am really saying is the "look and feel of being feminine". Like I said the erotic phase has not ended and I hope it never does.


Mollyanne