Can u take a step back? Me? No!!!
Can u take a step back? Me? No!!!
Hello Sherry,
Frustration and anxiety and many bad things come from dening your identity. What is your identity? What do you feel inside of you? It's ok if you don't know--discovery is part of the journey life. This strong internal identity seems different from people who claim different labels like TS, CD, bi-gendered, or androgynous, but for each of us it seems something part of us from birth, even if we spend our lifetimes figuring it all out. If you love a male identity at least some of the time, that's so cool. Just because you CD doesn't mean you have to deny that. Follow your bliss. Get obsessed, take a step back, do what works for you.
Me? Ah...in retrospect, my male identity never worked so well for me. I am so happy to be who I am today.
Sonia
Public journal at wordpress.com: soniakeys.wordpress.com
I guess my answer would be "it depends!" Those that are TS I guess it doesn't matter. Those of us that are CDers and have jobs and families to support have to have balance in activities including dressing. It certainly isn't easy. So far as thinking about dressing, well good luck on that one! Many times I've thought what could I have accomplished with my life if my brain hadn't spent so much time thinking about crossdressing. It has consumed a vast portion of my thoughts all the sixty eight years of my life.Originally Posted by docrobbysherry
Vivian
Thank u for your advice, experiences, tips, and support. There is so much for me to consider, while I'm gone. I'll miss this site, and all of u; probably MORE than I'll miss dressing. But, when I return, I hope to have a better perspective, if nothing else!
Whatever enlightenment I find, I hope to share with u.
Not, " Good bye", just, " See u later", friends!
U can't keep doing the same things over and over and expect to enjoy life to the max. When u try new things, even if they r out of your comfort zone, u may experience new excitement and growth that u never expected.
Challenge yourself and pursue your passions! When your life clock runs out, you'll have few or NO REGRETS!
Well for me it was quite easy,.. with my hair now short, I've pretty much stopped dressing altogether now for a month... I won't say it's something I'd ever be done with, and I know that it's something always on my mind (especially during the major times of stress) but so far, I haven't gone insane so it's really all in how you busy yourself with other things if you're looking to take a break...
jenn
Hi Sherry!
[SIZE=2]I suspect that Vtvicky is closest to the point my friend![/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]In my case I am able to get out in the comunity and pass. This gives me a sense of closure if you like .... I am happy to be sucessfull.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]IF I may be so bold .... I suspect that that is one of the things that is missing for you, and you are seeking ever greater things in the line of toys, but that does not satisfy the inner longing to be someone you are not.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]I suggest that, whilst you are apparently going on a trip, you find a suitable venue, where no one is likely to know you, and try to do it without the latex, and let the real Sherry out ... however lacking she might be in your ideal of how you would like to present her to the world.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]I promise that you will get quite a thrill from the experience!! ( I hope you don't have a weak heart ). It might get easier after that.[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]At the moment I have a fellow staying at my house. He is across my dressing, but as his stay has become rather too long I find that he grates on me ... as a result I havent dressed for a couple of weeks! I guess my dressing is associated with my happiness ... Does that happen to you as well?[/SIZE]
[SIZE=2]Best regards[/SIZE]
It depends RS, mostly on if it's a "state of being" or not. If so, the clothes make little difference as our self ID is secure regardless.
Second star to the right and straight on till morning
Hun I understand your angst. I have been married for many years and have been crossdressing fo over 30 years. I have thrown out so much lingerie and clothing in the name of "giving up" and have regretted it. Now I only get to dress whenever I travel and have noticed that my finnesse has increased due to the concentration of effort and the fact that I cant dress day to day. When you get the urge to dress, organise a meet with another Cd and get your rocks off. You will find it then takes a back seat for a period of time until the urges comes back! Sorry you are infected with the dreaded CD syndrome! Enjoy it! It wont disappear!
What I get from this question is can I dress less or cut back.. I have now in the past week (but it's been coming on longer) taken a look at myself, and see what there is about it.. I decided at the start of June to shave my upper body hair (chest, shoulders, wherever I could reach) and when I got to the point where I just had no more hair I thought job well done.. then I'm getting ready to take a shower and look in the mirror and there was a ton of hair on my back.. I just can't reach it.. my arms are really messed up from years of neglect and reaching back to shave those areas.. to give an idea, I can't hook my bra from the back, I have to hook it in front and then turn it to where the front (cup) part is where it is supposed to be... anyway after seeing my back (gorilla suit) I decided that this just didn't work and that, pretend as I might, I will NEVER be able to pull that part off and that dressing from my waist down has taken on the meaning of dressing, as it did in the beginning.. itchy scratchy time...
This is what I mean by "every guy can look like a girl from the right angles".. this is one of the first pictures of me dressed up.. very vague look.. almost fem...
Cold turkey will be difficult. And if you fail,(if?) you will be disappointed in youself.
I, like you, felt like I was getting out of control. Needed some perspective, some anchor, some priorities, some something!!
I am in the stepping back mode at the moment. I am trying to be just one person. Not man or woman, just me. The major facter for me was taking a look and what I would lose if I followed the path I felt I was on to the end.
In the end I would be a lonely old woman that used to be a man, used to have a wonderful wife, used to be able to walk out the door once in a while with out being thought of as a freak. (I think I could learn to live with the last one.)
I know from past binges and purges that it is not going away, so I needed to tame the Tiger. Nice kitty. I have reached a comprimise with myself that seems to be holding. Lot of work, but the pay off is that I am not completly ruled by desire. Yes I miss the fulfilment of desire. No I don't miss the fear and uncertanty, the confuson and dissapointment that follows.
Yes I still dress but it is only a part of my life. Not all of life. I won't die if I don't go out or dress. I won't die if I do.I just want to be me.
Now if you can help me figure out who that is, give me a holler.
I think not dressing is not healthy. Before I began dressing fully (and realized and accepted that was what I wanted) I purged my bras, panties and slips several times. What a waste of some very pretty things I wish I still had.
It isn't going to go away. You can deny it, you can not dress, you can have all the will power on the planet and it will not change the fact that you want to dress. The longer you live, the more this will be true. You could stop dressing this very moment, never do it again, but it won't stop your want or need.
As for balance, it depends on what you need to balance. Job, wife, children?
Only you can decide what is appropriate for your life.
But ask yourself, as a man, if your favorite clothes were cowboy boots, Wranglers, and western shirts and they appealed to you more than say suits and ties, would you freak out about it? Would you worry you were too western? In the summer, I don't wear anything other than shorts and a t-shirt and no shoes unless I am forced by need to do otherwise. I don't give it a second thought.
When I want to be a girl I wear the prettiest most fem things I can. It has taken time, money and effort to get them. Just like my guy side clothes. If I were younger and wasn't married and didn't have children (my children have no idea) I would be a very different person and would most likely have become a wonderful mixture of a man/woman full time. And in being myself I would have drawn a very different life and people to me that would have loved and appreciated me for exactly who and what I was.
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