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Thread: Moral support needed!

  1. #1
    They call me quiet girl.. Sarah...'s Avatar
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    Moral support needed!

    Ok guys and gals, my SO has organised a bit of a makeover for me for my birthday. A nice, modest affair with a beautician who offers a makeover, dressing and socialising service. The makeover I'm looking forward to. Ever so much. But there is an itty, bitty little concern I have.

    As I referred to in my only picture post so far, I'm a bit shy and I find meeting people quite difficult. So not only will I be enjoying my first makeover, with people I don't know, but I will also then be attending an evening event with as many people as our host can get together, followed by staying over and meeting again the following morning. This means my first evening outing as the complete and preferred me will be with quite a few like minded others as well as some accepting folk who are not TG. As well as with my lovely SO of course.

    I've got to tell you I'm petrified and excited at the same time. I've waited years for this moment and now that it's nearly arrived I simply can't wait. I'm also so nervous I can hardly think straight.

    My question is this, for those of you who've stepped over this hurdle already, can you offer any advice or nerve settling anecdotes that will help me through the next few days? Pleeeeeaassse?

    Sarah...

  2. #2
    Aspiring Member joank's Avatar
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    I've been 'out and about' but never in your circumstances. Keep the good attitude, be confident and tell us all how it went.
    joank
    joank
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  3. #3
    Aspiring Member tracigirl_tv's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sarah... View Post
    .....I've got to tell you I'm petrified and excited at the same time. I've waited years for this moment and now that it's nearly arrived I simply can't wait. I'm also so nervous I can hardly think straight......

    Sarah...
    Sarah, my experience is that the excitement will only increase and the petrification (IS there such a word??) will only decrease each time you accept the self-challenge to get out of your comfort zone. The fact that your SO (bless her heart) will be there should make this do-able for you, I think. You will thank her many times over for this majorly thoughtful gift.

    Please....will you post an "after-event" note to let us know how it went?

    Have a great time! *hugggggg*

    Traci

  4. #4
    Silver Member renee k's Avatar
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    Hi Sarah,

    Traci, offered some good advise. Having your SO or a big sister along will help you get over those jitters. As I related to another friend who's on this board. It's sort of like jumping into a pool for the first time. You stick your toe in to test the water. And then you just jump in. And before you know it you don't want to get out. So don't worry, just go and be yourself and above all have FUN!!

    Huggs, Renee
    Last edited by renee k; 08-11-2008 at 03:45 PM. Reason: spelling

  5. #5
    Lady in Training Jenny J's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by renee k View Post
    Hi Sarah,

    Traci, offered some good advise. Having your SO or a big sister along will help you get over those jitters. As I related to another friend who's on this board. It's sort of like jumping into a pool for the first time. You stick your toe in to test the water. And then you just jump in. And before you know it you don't want to get out. So don't worry, just go and be yourself and above all have FUN!!

    Huggs, Renee
    Let me just add one more thing my dear friend Renee told me, Smile, be friendly and have a good disposition. It will work wonders and breaks the ice. It will make everyone that much more comfortable.

    You'll wish you had done it sooner.

    Jen
    Last edited by Jenny J; 08-11-2008 at 03:53 PM.

  6. #6
    Ivy
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    Sarah,

    I have found that when I go out with friends, most of the nervousness passes. My first night out, I completely forgot how I was dressed. When you look at the other faces of people who see you as beautiful, the rest is just a haze.

  7. #7
    Joanie sterling12's Avatar
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    So let's try an appeal to the rational, practical, side of your brain. This is an ARRANGED Event. Could you imagine that she won't have informed the other people about what kind of event it is? You said there were going to be a lot of "like-minded persons." I would assume you mean CD's. Anyone else who is there is going to understand what they are getting into.

    So have fun, try and relax. Naturally, you should be excited and just a bit apprehensive. It wouldn't be normal if you weren't feeling like that. But, do not let your nerves get control of your enjoyment. It could ruin your evening!

    She's going to make you look great! It's always a concern for newbies: "do I look pretty enough?" "Will I pass inspection?" People are not at that Party to be judgemental, if you look great they will just have admiration. Put one foot in front of the other and "step out there." If you don't, you'll be mentally regretting it for a very long time. Aren't you tired of living in stealth? This is your big opportunity!

    Peace and Love, Joanie

  8. #8
    Aspiring Member
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    I can't believe how lucky you are to have your SO organize this! The only thing you will need to do is keep her close by and and if needed, focus on her and push everyone else out of your mind!

    If your SO knows of your fears, she can be prepared to help you face and overcome them.


  9. #9
    Tamara Ann Valla tamarav's Avatar
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    [SIZE=4]What an awesome opportunity for you! I doubt very many of us here have had such a supportive early outing and you will be the star. Remember, they are all there to support you, not judge you so smile and thank them all for being there and for their support.[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4][/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4]You will have a great time and will build many wonderful friendships of the new people you meet. This is a great chance to start off with a loud bang rather than a tiny whimper like most of us..[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4][/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4]Have a great time.[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4][/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4]Your sis,[/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4][/SIZE]
    [SIZE=4]Tami[/SIZE]
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    I am a licensed Cosmetologist (hair stylist, not cosmonaut), work as a hair and wig stylist, makeup artist and permanent makeup artist, dressed as you see in my avatar and albums.

    My web site www.apparentlyfemale.com

    I have over 2,500 pictures on my Flicker site located at http://www.flickr.com/photos/9315394@N02/

  10. #10
    Platinum Member Shelly Preston's Avatar
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    Hi Sarah

    Remember some of these people will be worried about meeting you too

    I attended sparkle this year ( first time out ) I expect you will find what I did

    People will make you very welcome I am sure you will be fine remember that everyone was new at sometime so they know how nervous you are

    dont worry you will be fine
    Shelly

    Super Moderator....How to tell your partner......Abbreviations

  11. #11
    ADMINISTRATOR Sandra's Avatar
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    I hope you don't mind a GG chipping in here

    DO let your So know that you are nervous she will be able to help, also as Shelly has said the others will most likely be as nervous as you are, so really your all in the same boat.

    Relax and enjoy your self.
    Sandra
    Administrator

    I always used to rib you about your legs can't anymore. R.I.P Sexy Legs

    R.I.P Rianna

  12. #12
    Unofficial CD Mom Holly's Avatar
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    Honey, if you weren't a little nervous about embarking on a new adventure you WOULD be unusual. Maybe looking at it this way would help... all these people are going to be there because they WANT to meet and be with you! That makes YOU pretty special. Enjoy your time out and be sure to let the rest of us know how it goes.
    Fulltime girl on the inside.
    Lipstick=confidence

    [SIZE=4]Holly[/SIZE]

  13. #13
    Gender Mutt bgirl's Avatar
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    I wish I had a hurdle like that to conquer, but hun, the love of your life will be right next to you the entire time. Many of us can only dream of having that support.
    I would be happy to have the chance to go out and about with someone other than myself. If they were ok with me, that would be more than enough acknowledgement.
    Let us know how it all goes. I'll be with you in spirit.
    Bethany
    yin/yang

  14. #14
    Straight, yet curvy
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    It will be nerve-racking but just try to relax and enjoy your gift. A lot of girls (myself included) would kill to be in your shoes. Just remember to give your SO all the attention you can. Keep us updated!

  15. #15
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    Yup had that jumpy stomach feeling for days before I got to the hotel n Chicago for the BeAll (my very first tme out, too, and I was alone).

    But when I walked into that Hospitality suite the very first time, my nerves disappeared and dozens of girls that were there were friends within minutes....

    Nothin' to it, babygirl. Just take the first step.

  16. #16
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    You have a wonderful situation, why worry?

    Sarah
    Your SO has done such a wonderful thing. I cannot tell you how good it is to have support and understanding like that.

    Of course its hard to see past the fear of meeting new people but perhaps you should look at it as if Sarah has a new part of her personality. She can socialize and enjoy wonderful people in a supportive environment.

    Sarah, take a deep breath, pick your head up and swing your hips into this new situation. Nothing could be better then what you have.

    Hugs
    Paula

  17. #17
    They call me quiet girl.. Sarah...'s Avatar
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    Wow, thanks everyone! That's great support and good advice. It's really helped me calm down and begin to enjoy the build up to the weekend. I think I may even be able to muster a little confidence! The other good thing is that it'll also help me support my SO who's nervous as well.

    I'll let you know how it went.

    Thanks.

    Sarah...

  18. #18
    Daddy's Lil' Princess kendra o'riley's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sarah... View Post
    My question is this, for those of you who've stepped over this hurdle already, can you offer any advice or nerve settling anecdotes that will help me through the next few days? Pleeeeeaassse?

    Sarah...
    Sweetheart - you'll be in seventh eighth and ninth heaven and you won't need any relaxation techniques or tips - if you're like most of us - seeing yourself in "your preferred form" especially professionally done will drop your needle finally into it's groove (okay you'd have to be old enough to know what came before MP3's to catch my reference LOL) and you'll blink and wake up and the night will be a sweet memory - breathe, and be grateful - being the "new girl" is a rush, and oh, so very special - rides the butterflies in your tummy to moon sweetie - you only get one "first time"...
    Walk like a lady, confident, caring and lovely...

  19. #19
    Senior Member vivianann's Avatar
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    Sarah you will do just fine especially since your wife will be by your side, since you will be with other tgs and cders your nervousness will not last long and like the others have said you will be comfortable in a short time, after your first time out you will be looking forward to more outings like that. my advice is to get dressed and enjoy yourself. Vivian

  20. #20
    Platinum Member Angie G's Avatar
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    Hi Sara just be yourself relax and enjoy your day of being a woman you'll be fine hun.
    Angie

  21. #21
    Member DeeDeeB's Avatar
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    It sounds really wonderful. I'm guessing that the nerves will be a tad edgy until you are dressed and made over, and Sarah gets to take over. Once you see yourself, you'll have smooth sailing. And give your SO a big hug for us for being such a great person.

    Dee

  22. #22
    faux femme Priscilla Ann's Avatar
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    Nervous and excited? I think all things are in place for a really memorable time.

  23. #23
    Tricia Dale tricia_uktv's Avatar
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    Hon, everything you do with this journey will be petrifying. If you want to do it, do it and try to enjoy it. As a girl you might be different than you percieve and far less nervous or shy (I am). I have just got my eyebrows shaped and my ears pierced - its causing a bit of a commotion in the office but I'll live.

    Relax and have fun!!!!!
    I strut my stuff, I feel so proud,
    I need to shout, to scream out loud,
    I am Tricia I am she,
    I am who I want to be

    http://tricia-dale.blogspot.com/

  24. #24
    Girl next door Cristi's Avatar
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    Sarah;

    You will be very nervous, self conscious and even afraid... for about 5 minutes (or less).

    As soon as you enter the room, nobody points at you and laughs and the sky doesn't fall, you're stress level will go from the red zone down to a nice comfortable level. I would guess that the last few days BEFORE the event, with all of the anticipation, are going to be *much* more stressful than the event itself.

    So my advice in a nutshell? How about that old song, "Don't worry, be happy". Remember, savor every moment it will probably be over before you know it and you'll be longing for it to go on and on.
    In a society in which it is a moral offense to be different from your neighbor your only escape is never to let them find out.
    -- Robert Heinlein

  25. #25
    Senior Member kimmy p's Avatar
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    Hi Sarah, I have two things to say to you. 1. I wish I had this opportunity, though I would also be quite nervous. It sounds like the best way for the fem you to get out and get used to interacting with others as a woman. 2. It's at this point that you need to dig in your heels and go for it. Take a deep breath, realize that there are others with our preferences that are going to be there, you are not being thrust into a hostile, you'll get clobbered if you're found out inviroment (say a NASCAR race ). If you can just get there and get started then you will soon find yourself relaxing, having fun, and trading clothing and beauty tips. Congratulations.

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