It amazes me at some, if not most stories in the fact that it takes so long to tell an SO about the crossdressing...I will state it again, I would marry my husband all over again with only 1 change, I had wished he had told me in the beginning. It would have saved us both a lot of grief....We all have relationship/marital issues that need to be dealt with and that is a part of life. When my husband told me he crossdressed after 7 years of marriage, it was a shock, to say the least. Yet, it made sense and relieved a lot of fears (little things I couldn't put my finger on in how he acted at times). He told me in a letter, explaining how it began, how he couldn't control it, how much he loved me, how he was NOT gay, etc. etc.
I have been told that I am controlling at times, "my way or the highway", but you know what? We all act that way at times, even hubby.
Best advise: Sit down, take time to think, don't make it all about you. Put pen to paper, type it out, think it out, tell the truth...even if it means that you have to say "I don't know why I feel/act the way I do", at least be honest. If you love her, tell her. Let her know that you don't want to leave her or her leave you (if that is your intention).
If she bought those girly items for you, maybe she was thinking another woman is involved , we even do things we don't understand. A many of us think that another woman is involved when we find girly things in our mans wardrobe. Again, just my two cents worth. If she doesn't accept the crossdressing, at least you would have the freedom of knowing you did your best in telling her, no more hiding. If she tolorates a little, it will make life better for you. If she is accepting, what a weight lifted! Just go slow.
