I think Niki B summed it up pretty well,, no your not a hypocrite.
If I could find my CD version of the dictionary I would post the correct meaning of the word,,, last time I needed it was to define the words emulate and imitate in a older thread here.
Cindy
Also the reverse, pretends to not have beliefs he does possess in situations where those beliefs are unpopular. Mere silence on a subject doesn't make one a hypocrite.Originally Posted by Paige.
I was questioning myself and my relationship to CD’s when this word came to my mind. I wanted to know if I am a dictionary definition of a hypocrite because even though I come to this site and offer my support and encouragement, I don’t march, carry banners, go to alternative style bars and parties and I have never told my dad or the rest of my family that I have been with CD’s. I suppose I could be called a closeted supporter but in the eyes of my CD friends, but does that mean I am a hypocrite? A hypocrite because I “pretend to have desirable or publicly approved attitudes, beliefs, principles, etc that I do not actually possess?”
Here's where I got lost. Are you pretending to have supportive beliefs but in truth do not? Are you merely silent on the subject amongst others who hold negative beliefs?
I think it's more of a "need to know" sort of thing. Some of my family know, some don't. Those who don't, do not need to know. Everyone has some secrets, and simply not mentioning everything doesn't make one a hypocrite, not everyone you know or are related to needs to know every detail of your life. Let's say, for example, someone is sexually submissive or likes rougher sex. Are they obligated to mention, perhaps at a family dinner, that they enjoyed a good spanking while having sex the other night? I think that might ruin someone's taste for dessert. ("Wow that cherry pie is the same color my butt was!")But then the dictionary definitions raised more questions than answers in my mind about crossdressers in general. Are all CD’s considered hypocrites because they pretend, or feign to be women when they are not? I am not a CD but I know I pretend to be pious and virtuous to my co-workers and family. Do you?
No, we shouldn't toss the dictionaries, but we shouldn't expand the defintions beyond what they are trying to define. Being a crossdresser is no different from being anything that is part time. One can be a sports fan but not monolithically, to the point where that is all one talks about. We'd be hypocrites if we condemned crossdressers while being one, if we disparaged transgendered people while wearing panties under our slacks. I don't think someone has to carry a banner in order to be true to themselves, especially when carrying that banner might put career and safety at risk.I am confused and would appreciate any ideas. Am I missing something in my understanding of this inward spiral of definitions?
Am I a hypocrite?
Are you a hypocrite?
Are none of us hypocrites?
Should we just throw the dictionaries in the trash?
Kate
"No, I'm not hitting on you, Ma'am, when I said I wanted to get in your pants, I meant I wanted to try them on!"
A wise person once said, "Think long, think wrong." Don't over-analyze, love. You are a blessing to us all.
PS. Has anyone else noticed that bible-thumping preachers are taking quite a beating in this thread? *lol*
The word hypocrite and the Hippocratic Oath have nothing to do with each other besides both originating with the Greeks and being similar sounding.
The Hippocratic Oath was supposedly started by Hippocrates, which includes the famous "Do no harm". Doing no harm would be the opposite of not impeding the death of someone. To impede is to obstruct, thus the physician's job is exactly to impede death, to obstruct and to block, if possible, the death of the patient.
The word hypocrite comes from Greek roots that do mean to play act. "The word hypocrisy derives from the Greek ὑπόκρισις (hypokrisis), "acting out", "feigning, dissembling" or "an answer". Of course, definitions change over time, and the accepted definition of hypocrite is now someone who hides their true beliefs under the cloak of feigned beliefs. Merely hiding or not mentioning them doesn't make one a hypocrite, as I do not discuss politics or religion, allowing others the space to have their own beliefs unchallenged. Saves pointless argument, because in a few minutes of heated debate you are not going to change someone's lifelong belief system. But I do not pretend to be whatever the religion or political affiliation of my companion, I merely refuse to enter into the debate.
A more glaring example of hypocrisy would be someone who publicly opposes racism while belonging to the KKK or some such group. In this example deliberate action in both directions have to be taken.
Being a CD and not carrying banners or actively supporting rights legislation isn't hypocrisy.
One of the things in our society I think is truly sick is how people can stand around, not even call 911, when someone is being abused or assaulted. There are video clips of such things on the internet and evening news, and to stand around while another human being is being hurt is far more than hypocrisy, it's criminal.
For what it's worth....
Kate
Last edited by Katheryn; 08-20-2008 at 07:00 AM. Reason: unclear and puncuation errors
"No, I'm not hitting on you, Ma'am, when I said I wanted to get in your pants, I meant I wanted to try them on!"
I agree. I would call it more self preservation. You simply are weighing the negative against the positive of saying what you believe, understanding how it would affect your life and deciding how much you are willing to handle or deal with. There is nothing wrong with that. You are not hurting anyone by keeping it to yourself, except perhaps yourself, but only you can decide what you can/will tolerate based on your comfort level. How would society be if everyone spouted off to others what was on their mind at any given moment. Society based only on emotion would be a volitile place. So relax, and be nice to yourself. You are a very sweet and caring person.
Love,
Laura
First off, don't get caught up in labels. You would only be a hypocrite if you publically denounced CDer's and said you didn't like them or thought what they were doing was wrong, and then went on to be with or support them.
I think the general definition is, someone who says one thing and then does another. As for as being a hypocrite just by being a CDer, that doesn't ring true. Merely supressing and not advertising the fact that I crossdress doesn't make me a hypocrite. I hate to say you are thinking too much, but....
Don't throw out your dictionary, just use it for spell-checking!
"I always wanted to be somebody…but I should have been more specific."
Lily Tomlin
I finally gave in and started a Flickr page for my pics, if you want to have a look....still loading haven't organized anything... https://www.flickr.com/photos/129221215@N08/
Of course, CDers may be hypocrital too, for instance when they tell another one she looks "pretty and soooooooh cute", whereas everybody knows he looks as an ugly man in a dress !
I dont classify that as hypocritical, I would call it not being honest.Of course, CDers may be hypocrital too, for instance when they tell another one she looks "pretty and soooooooh cute", whereas everybody knows he looks as an ugly man in a dress !
My heartfelt thanks and love to all for helping me get my head screwed on straight. I've read through every posted response several times now, swimming in your words and drinking them in like a sponge. I was a little confused but I see clearly now. I am not a hypocrite.to you all.
"It takes a real man to dress as a woman."
I say just toss that book in the trash. We write our own definitions as we go.
Much love to ya, Beth
I am in love with the most understanding GG and my biggest fan. Jennifer, I love you!
Nah, that's motivated by niceness. It may not be honest, But it is tactful. It's not always necessary(or smart) to say exactly what you are thinking. It's certainly not hypocritical, and is pretty harmless. If someone looks like "man in a dress", as you said, they already know. If they are fishing for compliments, giving them one doesnt make you a hypocrite. Maybe a liar, but I doubt it causes any harm.Of course, CDers may be hypocrital too, for instance when they tell another one she looks "pretty and soooooooh cute", whereas everybody knows he looks as an ugly man in a dress !
As far as this whole hypocrite thing and transgenderism, talk about taking a literal definition to crazy extremes. I think we all know what a hypocrite is...No one is required to put their career, safety, or their social or family position in jeopardy to be supportive of anything.
And the notion that tg's themselves are hypocrites may not be hypocrisy itself, but it sure is ignorant, and lacking of any kind of compassion. Unless said tg is leading a true double life, and publicly bashing his/her own kind, as well. A few "reverends" and politicians do come to mind. That woud be hypocracy.
Hugs,
Melissa
In the french version of Wikipedia, "Hypocrisie" is the clear opposite to "sincerity".Of course, CDers may be hypocrital too, for instance when they tell another one she looks "pretty and soooooooh cute", whereas everybody knows he looks as an ugly man in a dress !
Hence I would certainly rate "somewhat hypocritical" an unsincere compliment.
You are never obliged to say exactly what you are thinking, but nobody ever forces you to do an unsincere compliment. Moreover you may take the opportunity, instead, to gently suggest him/her a way of improving him/her appearence.
Someone doing an unsincere compliment on a forum may also wish to show him/herself as somebody really nice and very tactful, what he/she isn't.
A really nice guy/girl tries essentially to help, and as a rule avoid to be a liar.
Luvya
Nadia
We've heard about 4 subtely different definitions of the word. My point is that we all know what a true hypocrite is. The fact that one may be too nice, or yes, even too chicken to say something unecessarilly unkind, may show some negative things about them, but hypocrite is certainly a pretty strong condemnation of that. would you tell a person, who you know is very sensitive, and is known to sometimes take even constructive critisism the wrong way, That the meal they just went out of their way to make for you, stinks? Maybe some would, or try to help in some way, but some might also say when asked, "it was good", and leave it at that. If you wish to call that being hypocritical, that's your right. I would not. Yes, I have told other trans people that they wear too much makeup, or that they could use to work on their fashion sense a bit, in a nice way. But I think that depends on the two people involved, how well they know eachother, and probably at least half a dozen other factors. Personally, I have never gushed that someone was "oooh, pretty" when they werent. I would probably say nothing. But I still wouldnt call such a person a hypocrite. Sorry.
Hugs,
Melissa
Last edited by Melissa A.; 08-20-2008 at 04:14 PM.
Hi Paige,
I'll help you throw the dictionary in the trash. Then we will just enjoy each other's company!
Hugs,
Missy Anne
Paige,
to me hypocrisy always just meant someone who would say one thing and yet do another. You have always been very upfront about what your interest in CDs is (or is not) and that is totally fine. I am pleased to call you a friend.
so no to Hypocrisy
Iteresting piece on hypocrisy on the web today:
http://specials.msn.com/Hypocrites.aspx
Paige:
Hello
Pam
No Paige you are not a hypocrite, and I don't think anybody else here is either.
Excuse me Sir, is this your purse?
There is a difference between being in the closet and being a hypocrite. Being in the closet may simply mean that there is a part of yiur life you do not choose to share with the rest of the world. Being a hypocrite means that you practice one thing and preach another.
There is an important election in the US this November. Think about which canditates will support our rights before you vote.
Last edited by trannie T; 09-06-2008 at 08:40 PM.
It takes a real man to wear a dress.
Lots of long answers.I am who i am,end of story
Claire en femme,smart,casual and sexy!
So all gather 'round!
At one point, in a previous relationship, my ex took it upon himself to inform other people of my sexuality. When he told me about it, he was quite taken aback over my reaction. He felt that because I'm very open and honest about it, that it was perfectly okay to talk to others regarding it.
Sooooo not okay.
Why? Because its my right to tell whom I wish. Not anyone else's.
I'm proud of who Kayla is but have no right telling anyone about her private life because its just that, her private life.
You don't have to work in a restaurant to appreciate the food. So don't worry about not carrying the banners. Being a supportive friend/partner is FAR more important than screaming to the world you know people of any specific lifestyle, choice, religion, race, etc.
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
[SIZE="3"]"We're all born naked. Everything we wear is drag," said Boy George
[/SIZE]
Paige I agree w/ everyone else there is no way you are a hypocriticle and also demonic daughter had some good thoughts about how to explain that I always like her posts. anyhow know you are as straight forward as they come . Bethany
Interesting thread.
First, in answer to your questions, "Are you [Paige] a hypocrite? Unless you tell crossdresser jokes, etc, I'd have to say no.
Are crossdressers hipocrites? Let's face it. NO ONE is honest about EVERYTHING in life. (poor Diogenes
Three words. So be it.
Heidi99
My minister once delivered a sermon entitled "God Bless The Hypocrites"
To that I say......AMEN!
Got that one right, gf!
Heidi99
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