My wife knows, and has known since before we got married. She does not approve, but accepts. When it benefits her(wink wink), she is totally into it, otherwise, she gets annoyed and want nothing to do with it.
My wife knows, and has known since before we got married. She does not approve, but accepts. When it benefits her(wink wink), she is totally into it, otherwise, she gets annoyed and want nothing to do with it.
I have worn partyhose with my slip and long gray tee (aka dress) several evenings now, so it is becoming "natural". My wife hasn't reacted yet, but it is now certain that she knows. I wash the slip and pantyhose by hand and line dry them in my shower so they are not "hidden" and she bought me most of my femme clothes as disability "accommodations" anyway. I want to peruse the slips at our local Penney's as I am looking for slips with no bidice and a tank top. The ideal ones would be like the bodyslips that I got there last year, but without the spandex! The closest one to that on-line is a Vanity Fair 18" spin slip. I was concerned that the largest size available might be too small. but it is OK. The straps are narrower (like the straps on the bra that I'm wearing) but that is OK too, as they don't show since I wear the slip as a undershirt it in "boy" mode.Originally Posted by Donnadcd
Last edited by sfwarbonnet; 11-07-2008 at 11:35 AM. Reason: typos
My wife hates it, use to threaten divorce, until I moved out and now we get along quite well. I now dress up whenever I want and now that the fall is here, I get this desire to dress often, and since Halloween I've been over the top with it and now very passable.
My wife has known for 33 yrs, hates it but tolerates it.
I can dress, sans wig and makeup, around the house with no problems. Wear a nightgown to bed.
I can go out, but mustn't leave the house in fem mode.
She'd prefer I didn't dress at all, and wishes it would go away, but she knows this is part of me, born this way, and it's not going away.
She's been out with me, and has bought me many fem items. She wants me to be happy.
Still, she hates it.
DonnaT
I'm currently single, but reading all these posts of accepting, encouraging or non-accepting wives makes me realize how important the decision is of who a person marries... they could make your life wonderful or make you hide or feel shame.
I did have a beautiful girlfriend who really wanted to get married, but she wasn't exactly "accepting", and things ended mostly because of this issue, that was 4 years ago.
I'm 33 now, and I'm definitely looking for someone, but a girlfriend's level of understanding/acceptance would be a very important factor in marrying someone.
If I fell in love and got married at a younger age, acceptance would've probably of lesser of an issue (simply because I didn't "know" myself as much), so I can see why many of the tgirls here are married somewhat closed-minded people.
Wife and Dressing
After my wife and were married, I guess about year or so it came out that I dressed. Her answer was to not hide it from her and I don't. I don't think she truly understands it but when I get the urge like now she is ok with it. We made a promise to never keep secrets about things like this and so after almost twenty years together we are still deeply in love and accept all of our flaws as perfectly alright. She is truly my friend and confidant. We love shopping together because I will go to the womens section of the stores with her and not complain, oh how dreadful. LOL. There are times I wonder what it would be like to a women , but I really don't want transform.
Jeannie
Except for the number of years my wife could have written this. Some days she doesn't mind at all what I wear out (as long as I cover it till we get into the car so the neighbors don't see.) Other days it's more of a problem
My wife tolerates it but doesn't want anything to do with. Then every now an then shewill give me some small feminent thing.
My wife would probably rather I didn't do this, but she is okay with it other than that. She buys me things and helps me with clothes. She keeps bugging me to go through my things, I just haven't had time lately. She has gone out with before, and will probably go again. I've been so busy that last couple of years, so dressing hasn't been high on the list; but I do dress whenever I like.
Dana Ryan
My wife is very supportive. She goes shopping with me, helps me with makeup and such, and we've gone out in public a few times as a cute lesbian couple.As for being a woman full-time, it's not for me. I consider myself androgyne, and acting female all the time would be no more true to myself than acting male all the time.
Hi, I thought I would share my experience as a married crossdresser, and try to answer your questions. First off it was actually my wife who approached the subject about wondering if I would be willing to crossdress! Oh course all my life I had enjoyed everything that was feminine. I love women, women's things, clothes, hosiery and shoes! But now was my chance to actually dress up and not feel ashamed or self-concious, well maybe a little. I believe we have the best of both worlds together. We shop together, share a lot of our clothes, she helps me with my makeup. I know for a lot of us (CD's) out there the situation is very different. In my first marriage I would never have been able to broach the subject with my wife. But then I suppose it was because I was married to the wrong woman. I know of several couples who like to dress up together and shop etc. So all I can say is there are women out there who are truely interested, and desire a hubby who can be a "girlfriend" when a need arises. All I can say is if you are married you should carefully approach your wife about it, not telling her can be conceived as lying which can never help a relationship. Just be ready for her answer.
To address, the second part of your question, that is about wanting to be full time? For me the answer would be no. For a couple of reasons, first I love to dress because its a great and fun relief from my manly world. I love the feel of the clothes, the freedom and anonymity it gives me, not to mention the chance to experience both sides of life. When I dress, I can go places and no one but my wife knows who I am, yet alone what I am inside. I especially please my wife when she feels the need of some feminine company. But second, my wife loves me as a man, and for what men are good for. We have a great physical relationship when I am a man, and a beautiful emotional relationship when I am Sabrina.
Sorry for the book, but you asked.
I as the SO of MY gorgeous CD, I can say I feel for you guys that are getting such negativity. I commend you for being open! I was more hurt by the fact Jamee & I were married 7 years before he felt he could trust me enough to tell me. I love him for who he is, NOT what he wears! I am (being raised with 5 brothers)into alot of GUY things, so I guess I figure why cant he (being raised with 5 sisters and 4 brothers) be into GIRL things! LOL We shop together, and because of 4 children at home, he dont dress as much as he would like, but I dont mind at all when he does. YES I did, and still do have unanswered questions and concerns, but i guess in time the answers will come.
Jamees_Girl
My wife doesn't mind at all. I had to fess up about 10 years ago when she found a receipt for cosmetics in the laundry.She chuckled a bit but told me it was OK. She is very kind and doesn't mind at all.
I have been so lucky to have an s.o. that understands. My first one didnt , but as amatter of fact she has bought me clothes over the years and on occasion helps me dress and we go out. More now that all the kids have left home. Its wonderful and im so lucky..
meet wife on internet told her befor we even meet shes bee n100% she will pick my clothes for me and telles me when they do not suit love her loadsxxx
Mine hates it gf, has no interest in it at all
My wife is in the "Not Accepting, Hates it, Wants No Part Of It" Colunm. I live my CD life in the shadows. Well its only been 4 years since she found out so maybe if I give her a little time she'll come around (haha). I'm very envious of some of you girls.
My wife loves it and goes to events and TG balls and such. She loves all the people in my TG group and we have made local friends and go out from time to time. Her opinion of the TG friends I have is that they ar more "real" and are freindlier than most of the other people we know.
Tara
Where or should I ask, How do you learn of these events / balls. As I am new to this whole thing, only learning of it about 1 yr ago, I as the SO would not mind going to these meetings with my CDer,,if he would go. I would LOVE the chance to meet and hang with other couples in our situation! Thanks
After I told my first wife her reaction gradually descended from bemused shock to weary disgust, and ultimately outright contempt..It all got very nasty. To this day she still blames my crossdressing for everything that is wrong in her life. Any communication we have usually ends with,'...but...but.. YOUR'E A TRANSVESTITE!" followed by a storming off or slamming down of the phone.
Happily my new girlfriend is very supportive and accepting. I can't tell you how much of a relief it is to hear someone say, 'It really isn't that big a deal...' For my part I try not to get too carried away; keep dressing up to a once a week/fortnight etc, and also make sure I do the stuff she likes too
I gradually introduced my wife to my hobby over the last ten years. Being one who does not deal well with rejection, I was very cautious at first. If at any time she had given me negative vibes about it I would have stopped, but she always seemed to be accepting. It was really my shyness about it that made it awkward between us.
Around two years ago we started to talk about it more openly, at my request. I summoned the courage one night at dinner (after a few glasses of wine) to ask her outright what she thought of it. Now, she is not only accepting, she actually encourages it. On occasions she has purchases me clothing, and picks out what she wants me to wear to bed.
We both are very comfortable with my level of CD'ing, which rarely extends out of the bedroom. Our relationship has all of the normal ups and downs that any couple would, but thankfully, crossdressing is definitely a pleasure for both of us.
My situation is unique as we're not married, although we're a committed couple and plan to be together always.
Also, Julie met me after I was full time as a woman, so she's never seen my other side, and never will. She's completely accepting of me as a woman, and says we're more like a lesbian couple, even thought we're both bisexual.
The traditional "lines" or boundaries are completely blurred here, and we love it.
Smoochies for all, Marci and Julie
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC] My GG GF Julie and I send you all hugsI'm on the right in my avatar, Julie is on the left.
I'm sorry Dita that your wife tells you that I think you look just fine.I'm sorry to everyone who's wife is not totally understanding.
I never have been married or had a gf that knows of my dressing (I'm a TS who has transitioned).
The closest thing is my kids mom. I never see my son or his mother except on rare occasions when they are in Florida.
She is however entirely ok with it because she is an open-minded goth/aristic music freak type girl and is bisexual and I am the same way and bi too. And my son is 6 years old and likes to CD and wear makeup and might be gay.
Which I am proud of him for. We have our reasons for not being together but I'm glad that if we ever do get together as a family that this will not be an issue for us with such a large compatibility factor.
I think perhaps someday we might both want to settle down and we might get together as a family of freaks=)
I told my wife(girlfriend then) when we first met more then 14 years ago after just a few dates. I decided that if she didn't accept it I didn't want to be hiding my dressing or fem side. She accepted it and now encourages it and helps me with tips and we go clothes shopping. Is funny some as she never was one to be very feminine herself and jokingly says I'm more fem then she is.
Had a conversation with my wife yesterday in which she said she was sick to her stomach at the thought of me wearing frilly panties, deeply ashamed that all my friends and colleagues will be laughing at me behind my back - and finally thanking me for destroying our marriage with my habit. Thats after 18 months of knowing - so i guess we're not making a lot of progress ...
mitch
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