Getting out of the house

[Rachel B]

Hi, what would you suggest to someone who lives in a close knit neighbourhood.....

I usually go out at night-time (usually wearing a pair of jogging pants and jacket over my fem gear) and I want to just go out wearing a skirt and heels and nice top etc, but because of the proximity of the neighbours and the fear of being spotted I always bottle it.

I've almost done it on a few occasions but I always stop because I get the feeling that as soon as I walk out a neighbour will be looking at that moment.

I know it's a psychological thing and that in all probability even if a neighbour did look out they probably wouldnt think anything, but there's still the fear of being caught.

What would you all suggest?

[Christine Kelly]

Well, the idea of just 'walking out the front door, dressed' is probably NOT going to just disappear. (I know it didn't for me!) So. . . you just have to decide for your self when the time is best for you. And, then, just do it! And don't worry too much whether or not anyone will see you or not.
Like you said yourself, most of the fear is in your head.

[Susan4]

First, Hi, welcome. This is a great place with some really nice people.

Secoond. You have choices. When you're ready, just do it. If being 'caught' doesn't really matter (no impact on job, earnings or family - not necessary in that order). Then, it's just a matter of not caring what the neighbours think. You'll probablyl find they pretend not to notice.

The second choice, is to have a base away from home. A CD club where you can keep a locker, for example. A friend's house. Something like that.

Hugs

[Rachel B]

I grew up in Scotland and moved to North West England 8 or so years ago, unfortunately I've got no ideas of any CD clubs nearby nor do I have an option of having a base away from home.

I dont really know the neighbours that well, but they know my girlfriends family very well. It's the type of neighbourhood that likes to know what each other is up to, etc.

My GF knows about my CD, but she isnt very supportive. She doesnt complain about it, but doesnt really get involved like I'd like her to be.

I guess I'll just have to get up the courage and do it and deal with any consequences that arise. Life is for living after all........

xxxRachelxxx

[sherell]

i also have a wife that allows me to dress even buys me clothes but prefers me not to.
i use my car on the rare times i go out hopeing the neighbours miss me allways at night, never caught yet.
Sherell

[Jilmac]

Rachel, I know it takes a great deal of courage to go out in broad daylight en femme. I dont know how close your neighbourhood is but I live in a condominium complex consisting of 13 eight unit buildings. I see several of my neighbours every day. I have to walk about .2 miles to the cluster of mail boxes at the entrance to my street. The first time I made the trip en femme, I was paranoid about being spotted by the neighbors. I wore a non conspicuous skirt, top, and shoes. One neighbour lady saw me as she was driving up the street. She waved, and I waved back. I dashed home with my mail and breathed a big sigh of relief. I finally realized that the large majority of neighbours are at work at that time of the day so my paranoia was for naught. As I said, it will take courage the first time but once you realize that nobody really pays much attention to you, it gets easier.

[Teri Jean]

I did this just last week. I was going out to visit my sister-in-law for coffee and dressed to suprise her. As I got out to the truck (it's dark) I hit the remote to open the door and as I got in with the lights on I noticed my next door neighbor was in his truck getting ready to leave also. We are about 30 ft apart and as I backed out he waited like a gentleman for me to pass. Busted, probably but today while working in the yard we talked with me for some time and never brought it up. I guess it is when you are ready to venture out be careful but don't fret to much. Hugs Keli

[CD Susan]

Rachael i can understand your concern about being seen by your neighbors. I think it all depends on how close you are to these neighbors. If it was dark out and they seen an apparent female leaving your house they would not neccessarily think it was you. There are many explanations for such an incident taking place and you should realise this. This fear thing that we all experience is mostly in our heads and has little bearing in real life. Almost all of the time other people are so caught up in there own lives that they do not notice what is really going on around them. I used to live with this fear of being discovered but no longer feel this way. I adopted the attitude that what matters most is what I feel and what I want to do with my life and not what other people think, especially strangers. My advice to you Rachael is just walk out that door dressed as you want to be and do not worry about what other people might think. It is your life so live it the way that you want to and do not let others control you. Think of it this way, what is the worst that could happen to you. Would your neighbors stop talking to you.....so what, who needs them. Life is short so live it the way that you want and to hell with the rest of society that does not understand people like us.

[JenniferR771]

Oh Rachel,
I have the same problem. Non-approving wife. Neighbors are close. However at times I have shopped at a friendly thrift shop--took my wig with me; found a whole outfit and earrings, paid, and walked out completely dressed. A very nerve-wracking, but exhilirating experience. Of course then I had to arrive home, and get in the house--really quick. Cleaned up before wife got home from work. Halloween week is a good time to do this.

[Sally2005]

It is a problem. You can get all your foundation and shapewear on and even some clothing and leave the house that way. You will look pretty much the same as you always do to the neighbors. Once away from home in the car or a public family washroom apply the rest. This allows for a very quick change while out. To change back, bring baby wipes for your face and a change of male clothing. Find a family washroom that is not busy and reverse. It can be a pain and it takes away some of the fun, but it works. You just have to be careful you don't busy up a washroom since other people may end up waiting.

[Michl41]

I do exactly as Sally does, if the neighbors have a chance to see me, so far it has worked..................................Michelle

[Nicole Erin]

By close knit do you mean like everyone is cramped up in a tiny building or does it mean everyone knows everyone and are friends?

Just try the big city thing that we do in America - people in big cities like I live don't even talk to their neighbors. YOu don't have to say anything to them to let them know you don't want to be bothered, just do like I do - when you see them, make it a point to run inside or walk the other way or act like you are doing something...
And you don't need to be dressed any certain way to do this, just do so.

OH my gyod I have some fat cow lady living in the next building over that would scare a bulldog and sometimes she tries to talk to me. I ignore her best I can, so I know some neighbors are a pain.

[Mitch23]

i prefer not to 'walk out of the house' because the wife doesnt want me to but if it is the only option then i will and not be too bothered. I think i am kidding myself if i think that people do not know about my little hobby. I do have a friend nearby who allows me to store my clothes and change but sometimes i just cant be bothered to do a 20 mile round trip

mitch

[Tracii G]

I just get ready and go out.I know my neighbors have most likely seen a "woman" leaving my house but never said anything.
A new family bought the house next door so I won't worry about them seeing me. Just be me the odd CD guy next door.

[avril findlay]

Hi Rachel,
I always look forward to Autumn/Winter. For me it means long skirts and boots and going out dressed.

[Rachel B]

Thanks for the support, I actually got dressed last night, no make-up though, but wig, little black mini dress, a pair of fishnet suspender tights and my fav pair of 3inch heels. Thought "What the hell, it's 1am right, no-one will think anything of it?" and made my way to the front door, and started shaking like a leaf. I was so nervous.

My heart was almost beating out of my chest. Then it started to rain, and I thought about it for a bit, then looked at myself in the mirror in the hall and thought I looked too obvious. So I put on my normal rain coat and a wooly hat. I looked just like me should anyone notice, but if they looked down theyd see I was clearly wearing stockings and heels. I deliberated a bit, then I went to the front door again and once again froze. I couldnt go through the front door.

I went over and over things in my mind, but couldnt bring myself to go out the front. Then I thought, "stuff it" I'm all dressed up and nowhere to go. I had to go out. I had to break the barrier somehow. So I went to the back door and opened it. Took out the keys and went outside. I pulled the door to and locked it. Okay, so I'm out the back, nothing new there as I've been out here at night dressed before now.

I just got my head down and walked down the side of the house and got into the car. I was shaking and so nervous, but exhilirated also. What I wasnt expecting though was to be turned on. And girls was I turned on!

I started the car and drove out of the street and went for a drive. Once out of the street I removed my hat and coat and just drove around in my little dress and heels. It was so amazing, if a little difficult at first driving in heels, now I know why my GF wears soft shoes for driving.

So I've made my first forray into the outside world on my own. Maybe in time I'll manage to make it through the front door but for now, little steps before giant leaps.

I was surprised at being turned on by this though. I've had this before, usually when wearing sensuous materials like satin/silk etc, and also when I had CD sex with my GF when I first told her I would like to wear items of her clothing. But I didnt expect to be like this when I went out dressed.

I had to pull over in a secluded layby and sort it because I couldnt concentrate on driving.

It has made me think about what it'd be like if I went out in the daytime. At least at night at 1am there is little chance of being seen, but if I was in a busy shopping centre etc and it happened there I'd be in trouble as its not easy to hide!

Is this a common thing girls?

xxxxRachelxxxx

[MJ]

I usually go out at night-time (usually wearing a pair of jogging pants and jacket over my fem gear) and I want to just go out wearing a skirt and heels and nice top etc, but because of the proximity of the neighbours and the fear of being spotted I always bottle it.

who cares what they think.

I know it's a psychological thing and that in all probability even if a neighbour did look out they probably wouldnt think anything, but there's still the fear of being caught.

What would you all suggest?

learn to do a good makeup job then they will think some hot chick just left your place. and think to themselves lucky g*t at least he got some

[Edyta_C]

Its pretty scary the first few times out the door Rachel. While I don't go out much, the anxiety is still there each time. But remember, 99.9% of the time people are not sitting at the window waiting to spot a CDer coming out of her house or flat. It does get better with time. Also 95% of the people don't care what you are doing. The other 5% can ...

Hugs Edyta

[Deborah Jane]

I live in a cul-de-sac and the only comment i,ve ever had from one of my neighbours was
"I saw your lady friend leaving on her own late last night, i was surprised you didn,t walk her home or take her in the car".
I just answered "She lives local and was happy to walk home on her own".

Little did he realise, i would have a hard job walking her home

[DanaR]

You can get all your foundation and shapewear on and even some clothing and leave the house that way. You will look pretty much the same as you always do to the neighbors.

This is what I usually do, as Sally mentioned. I'll do all of my makeup, except for lipstick and get dressed; then pull a pair of loose sweat pants over whatever I'm wearing and a jacket, I wear my hair in a pony tail anyway. After I get away from the house, I'll pull over and remove the sweat pants, add lipstick and brush my hair.