It looks as if some Cders/TGs dont completely accept themselves, it kept me wondering how the larger society is viewing us or the effort the larger society is making to accept us....................in your own view who in the society find us weired the most is it the women or men.
[SIZE=3]The uneducated. Prejudice has no gender.Originally Posted by sosoft73
dancin[/SIZE]
I think it,s down to the individual.
Acceptance depends on each person themselves, gender doesn,t really seem to make a differance either way.
We are accepted or not by the person concerned, not by whether they,re male or female.
I agree with the previous two posts but I think the question was more general. In my experience I've found more women accepting of CD than men.
ColleenW
gotta go with that,
and sorry dancin, but education does not mean acceptance nor does it mean you don't think it weird, heck sometimes knowing about saomething makes it more wierd that somebody would want to do Y X or Z
I allow myself to set healthy boundaries ..... to say no to what does not align with my values, to say yes to what does.
Boundaries assist me to remain healthy, honest and living a life that is true to me
gotta go with that,
and sorry dancin, but education does not mean acceptance nor does it mean you don't think it weird, heck sometimes knowing about saomething makes it more wierd that somebody would want to do Y X or Z
Maybe not Jess but until we educate them we haven't a chance of giving them the option of a different view. Knowledge helps us see that the what seems weird isn't necessarily weird at all, that it's simply an been an unknown until then or a different POV.
But yeah some folks will never change their minds. We do what we can but in the end it is up to individuals to chose if they want to accept someone's differences.
BTW thinking something is weird doesn't mean that someone cannot accept anther's right to believe the way they do. Acceptance is not the same thing as seeing something in the same way. It is more along the lines of respecting someones rights to feel and behave as they do.
Last edited by dancinginthedark; 10-26-2008 at 05:06 AM.
ignorance knows no boundaries.
Being TG for as long as I can remember, I have accepted the fact that I am more female than male. A lot more. As for as who has a problem? I believe some fall on the CD or TG who has not accepted themselves and are looking for acceptance in others first. If you first like who you are, everyone else just has to find their own way of understanding who you are and some will never reach total acceptance. I also agree with Dancin.
Lanore
[SIZE="3"]Lanore[/SIZE]
Though it is changing steadily for the time being women are less violent than men, so finding transphobia from women isn't quite as dangerous as from men.
I've always found that real girls are incredibley tolerant of CDiing girls.
Last edited by avril findlay; 10-26-2008 at 09:23 AM.
I'm with Colleen.
IME, a few men do seem to have a problem - but perhaps that's more due to repressing a side within themselves they fear to acknowledge, like some homophobia? And certainly the West Indian cultures seem to have more of a problem with the idea of a man 'demeaning' himself by wanting to be seen as a woman..
Women finding it offensive is, IME, very, very rare?
This is NOT a major problem - the biggest problem is the fear in your head of what may happen?
Nicki
[SIZE="1"]Moi?[/SIZE]
I think women are more accepting, although they might not want to marry a CD. Some men are so full of hate for some reason, that they would resort to strong physical violence and cause serious injury to a CD without a second thought.
I've had much more acceptance from women than men. I also think men are more likely to vocalize their opinion. I have even had a few women come to my defense. In general they seem to be more accepting.
Gen
It likely boils down to how they generally feel about Homosexuality--Unfortunately, Most of a large percentage of the population mistakingly beleives thad CD and homosexuality are the same thing.
Most women are open to gay guys, so I suppose more ggs would be more tolerent than guys. But women can be just as hateful as some men. I suppose it depends on the individual, the culture they are raised in and their degree of education or ignorance in these matters.
My experience is that women tend to be more accepting [unless it is their own man doing the CD'ing.]
Guys are more likely to try to pretend it doesn't exist, shy away, or get angry about us.
I imagine it is cause women are not as insecure about their gender ID, and if a man is CD'ing and wants to be a woman for any amount of time and on any level, it is like someone wants to join their team.
So, as a whole, I think non-CD or non-tranny chaser men hate CD'ing more than women do.
It takes a true Erin to be a pain in the assatar.
Men hate us.
Woman are disgusted by us.
Well, of course, I'm talking about those that do not understand and are intolerated by the thought.
Most of the comments mentioned women are more tolerant that men, regarding crossdressing; I would agree. What I've found, over the years, is if you were to talk to many of these women they have no problem as long as it isn't their BF or husband that is CD'ing; then they might have a problem.
Dana Ryan
I have found women to be more accepting of CDers than men. I think men have the belief that a person must be gay to wear womens clothes. Most women that I've encountered have been very cordial, especially those who work in stores selling womens clothes. I have been to restaurants, taverns, and night clubs, shopping malls, coffee shops and bookstores, and the female employees treated me with the utmost respect. Men on the other hand, seem to look away or make comments and gestures when they see a CDer. Those guys don't know how much fun they're missing.
Luv andJill
Straight, into Fantasy Land
Its quite nice to get some of your responses.
Women especially not our SOs find Cding exciting (kind of), while more men find it disgusting/annoying/shameful (that one of them is "demeaning" himself or changing into the other side).
Hi Genifer.
Quoted for truth.
It is worth mentioning that the most hateful transphobic views published in books and a lot on the net come from women.
Some of the radical feminists undoubtedly hate us substantially.
They've accused us of being spies of the patriarchy, that MtF transexuals transition so they have a female body all their own to rape and abuse, that FtM transexuals are lesbians in denial being mutilated for acceptibility and a whole host of repulsive hateful things.
Transexual pioneers were cast out of womens groups and organisations, some including death threats!
TG rape victims have been denied acess to protection and shelters and even blamed by othr women for inviting the rape be being transgender!
Even Germiane Greer has said such things.
Thankfully these people are a minority but they are a vocal one. and the UK organisation Stonewall has even nominated one for an award!
So there are women who hate us with an extreme hatred.
That's fine with me...I hate them too xD
(^ That applies to ignorant men as well ^)
I don't care if it sounds mean...no matter how much ground we gain in terms of social acceptance (not saying that doing so is a waste of time by ANY means), there will ALWAYS be those who don't like us.
If they are going to hate me to the point where they want to kill me, for something as minuscule as me being trans (which has no effect on their life ;/), then screw them. They can die in the streets for all I care ;D
Last edited by Mydia; 10-27-2008 at 07:12 AM.
All those who say men and women react differently to our gender presentation are missing this important point. What we witness as CDs in public is how women and men react to gay men because that is what 99.9% of lay-people believe a CD is. They don't know anything about gender issues.
Women have nothing to fear from gay men and indeed many think it is great to have them as friends as they can get an inside scoop on how the male mind works. On the other hand many men feel uncomfortable with gay men but since it is now politically incorrect to say anything against gays they will usually keep their mouth shut.
Women usually find more problems and reservations and also overt bigotry toward TG people.
They consider people like TV's CD's and sometimes DQ's as offensive and parodies of women.
And some feel they feel like being slapped in the face (as a gg I know said before) when they see a man doing womanly things.
Straight Men don't like TV's who are manly and wear lingerie really.
But alot LOVE CD's and TS and DQ's weather they admit it or not!
Yet they still make rude, ignorant comments like calling us "punks" and "sissies" and making us synonymous with gays buy using the Fag word to us.
On the inside they wanna jump our bones, much of the time even if they don't say it to anyone, they still see us as sexual objects like they see GG's as.
So since men see us as potential sex partners, I think straight women are more offended by TG's.
I believe women are much more acceptable, unless that woman is your wife!
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