View Poll Results: Has anything bad happened to you when out?

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  • No, nothing

    96 47.52%
  • Some laughing or rude comments, nothing serious

    90 44.55%
  • Aggressive verbal harassment

    15 7.43%
  • Stalked, followed or creepy behaviour

    14 6.93%
  • Attacked, beaten or assaulted

    3 1.49%
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Thread: Has anything bad happened to you when out?

  1. #1
    Banned Read only battybattybats's Avatar
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    Has anything bad happened to you when out?

    Lets see what the real experiences of those who go out are who are members here.

  2. #2
    Aspiring Member
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    Oh! I got to be first on the poll!

    just some pointing and laughing... nothing really bad.

    but lots of GREAT WONDERFUL EYE-OPENING experiences!


  3. #3
    Banned Read only
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    I've been in a couple of scuffles when out dressed, some ned lifting my skirt up or squeezing my boobs. Nothing serious, but it certainly gives you an insight into the GGs world.

  4. #4
    Senior Age Member sissystephanie's Avatar
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    I am probably different from most the girls on this forum as I go out in public looking like a man, but dressed totally in feminine clothes and shoes. No wig and very little, or none, makeup. Been doing this for 3 years now, since my dear wife, who always did my makeup and wig, passed away. And I go evrywhere that way. If you are confident in who, or what, you are you should have no problems. I am a Crossdresser and I am proud to wear female clothing!!

    I do sometimes get comments, but usually they are compliments on my outfit. I have had ladies ask me where I got the beautiful skirt or blouse I was wearing. Thanks to my late wife I do have a lot of very pretty things to wear. Have heard some giggles from teenage girls, but that's all.

    Hold your head high, and walk like you belong in that pretty dress or skirt!!

    Stephanie

    Lady on the outside, but man underneath!

  5. #5
    Queen of the Faery Realms Bethany_Anne_Fae's Avatar
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    Every year, I have two men who follow me around the Texas Renfest reciting shakespearian poetry, buying me roses etc...

    They have no idea I'm not who they think I am, but they have never gone beyond that point.

    I've politely declined their advances and they have been "gentlemanly" enough to bow out gracefully

    *hugs*

    Zara
    (Formerly known everywhere as Lady Zarabeth

  6. #6
    Aspiring Member Nadia-Maria's Avatar
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    I got several astounded looks and even a few bad ones, but I didn't care to them ; and maybe some gossips behind my back, but I didn't hear any so far.

    Much more often I got a friendly "hello".

    I must precise that I never went to troublesome places, such as the subway.

    Nadia

  7. #7
    Silver Member DanaR's Avatar
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    Several years ago, while at a TG convention, a friend and I were walking back to our hotel. As we were walking down the street, several teenage girls confronted us and said, “Are you guys”? We were startled and then as we were saying no, my friend (that is on hormones) plopped one of her boobs out and these girls’ mouths just dropped open. It was a Kodak moment.
    Dana Ryan

  8. #8
    Crossdressing Curmudgeon TommiTN's Avatar
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    I answered in the "No, nothing" category as that has been my experience so far. I must add the caviat that I just started going out this year and have only done it in a group setting, so the old "safety in numbers" adage is likely in play. I also travel to a more socially liberal city to visit my sisters in the group and get out and about. My answer would probably be entirely different if I tried to CD in public where I live.
    Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

  9. #9
    Gold Member erickka's Avatar
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    Not much here, usually a couple of laughs. Got a lot of compliments last friday, Mostly from GG's who said I had good taste in outfits. Lots of smiles from younger girls, but not one foul look or rude remark. Went to at least 10 stores and a Mc donald's. All was great.

  10. #10
    Gold Member MJ's Avatar
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    only once did i get some Aggressive verbal harassment but was like 4 years ago and the " guy " never come out of his house .
    nowadays i tend to get the look mum is that a boy or girl.. or if I'm unlucky and get the bus the same time as the school kids i get read.
    thats nothing and I'm out everyday so i feel very lucky so far but i also never go out after dark
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

  11. #11
    Style Icon Sara Jessica's Avatar
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    I've only had the usual double-takes and little giggles with a handful of snide comments. I can't say any of these experiences should be categorized as bad, especially in the context of potential violence against any woman, not just one who happens to be tg.

    I only go to mainstream places which are crowded with the muggles. And I agree with the comment above that a vast majority of those we all encounter simply go about their business and probably don't even notice the tg girl amongst them. The positive encounters I've had greatly outnumber any negativity that I've perceived.
    Like a corpse deep in the earth I'm so alone, restless thoughts torment my soul, as fears they lay confirmed, but my life has always been this way - Virginia Astley, "Some Small Hope" (1986)
    Sunlight falls, my wings open wide. There's a beauty here I cannot deny - David Sylvian, "Orpheus" (1987)

  12. #12
    Tamara Ann Valla tamarav's Avatar
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    [SIZE=4]Lets see, other than an arrest in 1975 for "appearing in public in the dress of the opposite sex" (Denver, Colorado, the law has now been changed). An elevator mugging gone bad for the mugger (remember I have a Thrid Degree Black Belt, he didn't), and a few rude guys on the street, no nothing that fits your poll.[/SIZE]

    [SIZE=4]I seem to be doing well now....270 Jane L 11-1-08 5 (2).jpg[/SIZE]

    [SIZE=4]Your sis,[/SIZE]

    [SIZE=4]Tami[/SIZE]
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]

    I am a licensed Cosmetologist (hair stylist, not cosmonaut), work as a hair and wig stylist, makeup artist and permanent makeup artist, dressed as you see in my avatar and albums.

    My web site www.apparentlyfemale.com

    I have over 2,500 pictures on my Flicker site located at http://www.flickr.com/photos/9315394@N02/

  13. #13
    Miss Conception Karren H's Avatar
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    I lost $50 at the local casino enfemme!!! How friggin bad is that? That's a weeks worth of makeup!!!

    Never had a problem out enfemme.. Figgured if there weren't more than two of them I could kick their ass's or at least do some major damage..
    Current Obsession - Breasts and Lingerie!

    .......My Photos

  14. #14
    Outdoor girl seeking..... Sam-antha's Avatar
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    It was not bad, but it could have been awful. In London, in the seventies, a man crossed the street to speak with me. He did too and insisted that I went back to my hotel with him. No, nothing came of it, he was a policeman in uniform and seemed more concerned with my safety than the law that I had broken.
    Other than that, no probs. Well once, some teens read me.
    ~Samm
    .
    'Kerriana "Samantha.....i feel like I'm hearing her through fractured glass.. She makes sense if you kinda squint"


  15. #15
    Girl next door Cristi's Avatar
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    I hear a laugh or somebody comment to a person they are with ("Is that a man?") perhaps once out of every half dozen times I am out.

    The three most drastic things that have ever happened were pretty benign. Once, I was in a store and the security guy followed me for a while while talking on his radio. I could imagine he was probably telling his buddy "I'm following a tranny down ailse 5". I was just about to stop to confront him when he finally got bored and turned away.

    One other time was while walking along at a mall on halloween a few years ago. I was followed for about 1/2 the length of the mall by 3 teens that were making comments loud enough for me to hear. I could have ducked into a store to shake them, but decided that whatever was going on with them was THEIR problem and I wasn't going to change my behavior because of them. I was just a bit worried that that they would follow me into the parking lot, though.

    Finally, I was walking across a crosswalk once in the evening when I heard a shout of 'Show us your tits!' from a truck waiting at the lights. I DID have pretty large forms in at the time and a tight top, so was pretty much already showing them quite a bit. I just smiled and kept walking. Who knows, maybe they thought I was a GG!
    Last edited by Cristi; 11-03-2008 at 12:24 PM. Reason: typos
    In a society in which it is a moral offense to be different from your neighbor your only escape is never to let them find out.
    -- Robert Heinlein

  16. #16
    Senior Member Lilith Moon's Avatar
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    Great topic Batty.

    One one occasion a long time ago...jeered at by a group of teenage girls in a busy mall...screams of "It's a guy". Since then, a few sniggers and "knowing" looks but nothing serious. Recently, I again found myself in the middle of a crowd of teenage girls while dressed femme and wondered if history would repeat itself...nope, nothing happened.

    How could I have forgotten ? I was "chased" by a guy who had read me, which was terrifying. He caught me up and explained that he was also a CD-er..to prove it he showed me some of his pics that happened to be in his camera. We swapped a few details and parted amicably...if you are reading this...you know who you are
    Last edited by Lilith Moon; 11-03-2008 at 03:39 PM. Reason: Added the "chase" part

  17. #17
    Wife's best friend Jenny Beth's Avatar
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    Well it's been years since I've been out but never had anything happen other than a rude comment or a giggle or two. On the other hand once when my wife and I were crossing an intersection in "shortish" skirts we got whistled at..........gotta take the bad with the good!
    You don't have to have been born female to enjoy being a girl

  18. #18
    Gold Member
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    Yes people have laughed or made stupid comments.
    A couple times late on a Saturday I got some real harsh comments.
    Stalked? Well once some guy followed me, I didn't know until he pulled up next to my car and said "Those are some nice legs I would really like to get between them..." I don't think he knew what I had down there...

    I try not to put myself in a position where I could get my ass beat...

    and on that note - what if someone attacked a CD and the CD beat the assailant's ass? It has happened. I mean we ARE men after all. I know if I got into a physical thing cause i was read, I would fight as hard as I could, I am not puny.

    I would give plenty to see some hater get his ass kicked by a man in a dress.
    It takes a true Erin to be a pain in the assatar.

  19. #19
    Lady in Training Jenny J's Avatar
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    Other than spending more money than I should have at Lane Bryant, no. My outings have been pleasant but I figure the law of averages will catch up to me someday. Hopefully it won't be too bad of an experience. Should something happen, I plan on staying low and doing a little E & E.

    Jen


  20. #20
    Big Sister Nicki B's Avatar
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    So, if one bad thing has happened to you in 20 yrs of going out, that's all that counts?


    Batty, don't you see what I mean by creating a climate of fear?


    I've been laughed at, occasionally (but not for a few years now) - and I've been assaulted and had my nose broken (in a gay club, incidentally). But those are hugely outweighed by the number of times I've been out and people have been good to me - and when bad things have happened, ordinary decent people (men and women) have helped and stood up to be counted?

    Batty, what are your personal experiences? How often do you get out and interact with the general public, or are you looking for justification to be fearful, too?

    You're asking these questions in a slanted way, can't you see that?
    Nicki

    [SIZE="1"]Moi?[/SIZE]

  21. #21
    Silver Member Jonianne's Avatar
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    I answered nothing serious, but I did have a man follow me all through a large bookstore once. That was the only time that felt creepy. I also had someone that knew that I crossdressed and made a rude comment to someone he was with, saying "is that a man or a woman?" while I was in drab at the time. I'm easily made, so I get looks fairly often, but that just goes with the territory. Half of those are smiles. I only go out during the day, so I believe the risks are minimial. The joy of having the sun on Joni's face far outweighs the minimal risk.
    Joni

    "Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free" Bob Dylan

  22. #22
    Rainbow Rennie Butterfly Bill's Avatar
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    Once every two or three months or so someone will yell "faggot" or something like that thru an opened car window. I get "nice dress", or smiles far more often. Mostly I get indifference.

  23. #23
    Member Annette_boy's Avatar
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    Poll

    I answered no because getting arrested and locked up was not on the list.
    The DUI had nothing to do with ny being dressed enfem just a stupid thing I did but the cops did not treat me any differently than they would have treated any other Drunk.
    other than that I have been going out for years and nothing negative (hope the luck holds ) and I have been 24/7 for 2 years now

    Hugs and Kisses
    Annette


    "Yea though I walk through the Valley of the shadow of death I shak fear no evil cause I am the meanest SOB in the Valley" Sign in a Vietnam War Mess Hall aprox 1967
    "It takes more courage for a man to appear in public wearing a dress than to charge into battle"

    Me July 2005

  24. #24
    Silver Member trannie T's Avatar
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    Twice when leaving my motel room construction workers have seen me and laughed. Walking down the street one evening a guy looked at me then said, "Somebody needs a makeover." The worst thing is that he was probably right. I have never experienced any real rudeness of ever felt threatened. The enjoyment I receive from getting out is worth a thousand times more than the minor abuse I've received.
    It takes a real man to wear a dress.

  25. #25
    Gold Member Diane Smith's Avatar
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    There have been two incidents that creeped me out a bit.

    About 11 years ago, I went shopping, in drab, in a big thrift store in Tucson, Arizona. There was a well-dressed (suit and tie) 30-something Hispanic man in the store, just wandering around, who made eye contact with me a couple of times and seemed to be watching me as I was trying on some (women's) shoes.

    After I got done and paid for my new skirt and about three pairs of shoes, he appeared in front of me, blocking my exit from the store, and started yelling about how "God hates faggots," and the Bible says that men who wear women's clothes will burn in Hell. I kind of pushed my way around him without saying anything and made it out onto the street. He followed me out of the store, continuing to yell this abuse, down the length of the block and across the street until I got to my car. Other people on the street were definitely stopping and turning to watch the show.

    At the last minute before I dove into the car and sped off, I said something like, "thank you for your concern about my immortal soul, but I guess I don't believe the same things that you do." I left him standing in the street and got out of there as quickly as possible. The situation did not turn violent, but it was more than a little creepy, and left me shaking for a few minutes. It was also disappointing that the store employees did, to my knowledge, absolutely nothing about it, even though he started his harangue inside their place of business. As far as I know, he might have gone right back in there to lie in wait for the next poor man shopping for women's clothes.

    The second incident happened as I was leaving my nail salon after one of my biweekly appointments. I always dress up for these. The salon is in a strip mall and it was about a 100 foot walk from the door across the parking lot to my car. As soon as I stepped out the door, a man appeared on my left and said, "Sir, I want to talk to you. Why are you dressed like that?" I ignored him (after all, I'm not a "sir" when dressed up -- I acted like he was talking to somebody else) but he followed just a few feet behind as I walked to my car, yelling out "sir, I have a question for you" and "sir, stop and talk to me" all the way. He emphasized the "sir" part.

    I just kept walking and got in my car. I doubt anything too bad could have happened there because I am well known and liked in the nail salon and I could always have run back there. In retrospect, the worst thing about it may have been realizing that I was so quickly read as I walked by!

    Obviously these were a couple of, uh, "unbalanced" individuals -- the first probably a lot more than the second -- and neither one seemed intent on doing me any physical harm. But it's good to remember that they're out there, and prepare in advance how you will handle these situations. Both of these incidents happened at mid-day in bright daylight -- no apparent drugs, alcohol or cover of darkness involved.

    - Diane

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