That's It! I'm out ....

[Julie]

So happy for you Joanna, as I read your description an old saying that ends in 'bricks' came to mind. I'm so glad you persevered and everything went well for you.

~Julie~

[eileen1969]

I smiled as I read your story and it really reminded me of my times! when I was in a particular situation! The car trip and one time I ran out of gas and thought "oh shit!" and I knew I had no chioce but to get out and get gas! Also a time when I rode around until I came close to empty! I eventually had no chioce to go to a gas station! I am reminded of those events that actaullly made me stronger and also even more courage! It does take time and here I sit in a public library which I FIRST started out dressing up! I am here and with my real long girl nails and not dolled up but I have that chioce either to deck out or not! ty girl for reminding me of where I once was and the possiblities of just being! Sometimes a girl still gets scared hun laters Ronxxxooo it is possible to break the chain and be free if you believe in yourself and she will come to you!

[AbbyLee]

Wow!! I wish I was in a situation that would allow me to do what you did, I love your description of the outing, and you passed so successfully. Way to go hun

AbbyLee

[Laurie Ann]

It takes a lot of courage to go out the first time dressed. I did it recently and I wondered if I was going to die. I lioved and now lookforward to doing it again, still need to work on walking in heel 3" are ok but 4" stilletos are harder.

[JoannaDees]

Day 2 .... I did go out again. This time more bold.

Getting out of the house was uneventful, but I had to do it twice because I forgot my cell phone. Next stop was Blockbuster to return a movie. As is the pattern, today was a day the local highschool was having a car wash in that parking lot. Oh well, there was enough distance and I returned the movie in the outside slot and left.

Then on to Monterey. Ha ha, while driving I passed some trucks and it made me think of Tonia. I wondered, how does she get them to look at her? When I got there it was overcast and chilly, so I changed into jeans. Walking towards the wharf, I felt HUGE. I was faltering. I finally just found a bench and watched the boats and the people. Lot's of people strolled by. Not a single second glance. I guess I'm doing OK, or EVERYBODY is cool (that's tough to swallow). It was just too cold, so I decide to go north.

I drove to Santa Cruz, drove through downtown and out to the Municipal Wharf. You drive onto it for parking, which I did. This place was crowded, but I swallowed my fear and started out. I just walked, looked at the bay, the birds and so on. I wandered where I wanted to go, to get a beer, and that place was very crowded. I just kept heading in that direction and nothing happened. Well, the sea lions barked, but probably not at me. I was in the thick of the crowd and no reactions. That's a good thing, but one day it'll happen and I need to prepare for that.

I got a beer, and snuck around the corner to a bench to give my mind a rest. Three guys had just ordered and came to a table close by. They watched me. I don't know why, but it was not very comfy, so I went further down the wharf. I learned then do not stare at women any more! I had a nice time sitting out there, just another person in the crowd.

I decided I better go home, because I did not want to agonize over which restroom to use. On the way home I stopped at a liquor store to get some beer. It was crowded, a long line, I had to talk, yada yada but again the world stood.

I'm just shaking my head now, wondering what the heck happened. I suppose it was a combination of passing and cool people. Maybe a restaurant next time. Darn, it's kinda boring sitting here in my closet again.

Joanna

[Julie]

Way to go Joanna! I remember somebody saying, "We have nothing to fear but fear itself"

Just about about a month ago I'm out and it's around 6AM. I drive by the grocery store and realize I need some things. I don't want to go home and change, in fact I don't want to change at all. I was enjoying being dressed. So I said "What the he--" and pulled into the parking lot and went in. I must have shopped for over a 1/2 hour and not one funny look. I even purposely made eye contact with two people who just looked and went about their shopping. Not even a bat of an eye.

When I checked out I used the self check because I knew my voice would give me away.

As I walked out a guy was coming in and again, no reaction.

I can't say for sure but I think I passed that day and I feel the reason is I acted natural. And for some reason I just didn't care if anyone knew.

Congrats Joanna. Now I'll bet you can't wait to do it again!

[Di]

Way to go......Took alot of guts so glad you went through with it....in your post you sounded so happy,,,sending hugs

[Tristen Cox]

I'm just shaking my head now, wondering what the heck happened. I suppose it was a combination of passing and cool people. Maybe a restaurant next time. Darn, it's kinda boring sitting here in my closet again.

I bet the beer had nothing to do with it either Well done on your escape into the world. Just try to remember us little people when you get all famous and what not

[Sharon]

Wow, Joanna, this is getting to be second nature to you now! I'm both incredibly proud of you, and, admittedly, a bit jealous.

Well -- now we're into day three of your metamorphosis and I can't help but consider what your next adventure will be. Oh, the mind simply boggles at the possibilities....

[sheiligh]

wheres this going to take you??? i know that answer!!! out more and have more fun doing it!!!!! luv sheiligh

[arula]

wow wow wow! Joanna, You fill me with wonderful dreams, only a CD can appreciate! Thank you XOX. Arula

[Rachel Ann]

Joanna, you are leaving me in the dust. I'm still afraid to go out by myself.