On Saturday I went to my local Trans Gendered Group and afterwards went to an Italian restaurant dressed. That is probably not such an earth shattering situation for many of you, but for someone who has only dressed five times is his life, twice in studios and thrice at home and I am 64 years old, it was in retrospect absolutely mind blowing
Walking from the car to the restaurant I expected to feel embarrassed, yet the most amazing thing was how normal the situation felt and how normal I felt. At the door there was a quite merry crowd of smokers, yet with an excuse me we were in and were greeted by the proprietor. He would recognise me in drab, but whether he did dressed I don’t know. During the meal two young attractive ladies came across and had a chat with the three of us.
Two of us are over six foot tall and yes we were read (I believe that is the term), but I really felt “so what”. What I am trying to get across is that the terrible fear and trepidation I felt before going out that night turned out to be really quite groundless.
I want to publicly thank my wife who, despite grave reservations, encouraged me to take this step knowing how much I yearned to go out; Nicki B, who has been absolutely marvellous in counselling me about my fears about this condition of ours over the past few months and who was with me last Saturday and also a thank you to Holly for advice earlier this year. I am not out of the woods yet, and I expect quite a few more tears will be shed before I find the right balance of my desires and what is acceptable to my wife.