Dating Men

[CharleneT]

hey all,

SO, today the plots "thickens" ! There is a man who has been paying attention to me a lot in the last couple of months. Today he asked me out for Sunday. He has to check work schedule, but assuming all is well, I'm going to be taken out to dinner on Sunday night. Dressed is the idea, so soon I will not be able to say that I have not gone out with a man dressed (or for that matter, at all).

Ok, wish me luck, because it is more than a bit scary. He is nice, polite and hasn't yet acted like the usual "admirer's". We are going out in his town (north of me by a bit) and he said any restaurant I wanted. I mentioned that in good light I may not pass so well.... he said he would be happy to have me on his arm in any light !

I will report back, not sure if I should do it here or create a new thread ( do not want to hijake this one ). BUT the useful part is that I will be able to answer somethings asked at the begining of this thread, in a way that I could not before.

Charlene

[JillHill]

The reason I dress is to find a little softness in life. I also want to expierence many things I like that are tradtionally classified as female. Being an A type personality, when I am dressed I really want to body else to take charge, I want attention. I have not dated or had sex with a man but sometime the urge to have one hold me and cuddle with me is strong.

I am straight, but sometimes the feelings are there, but I have never found a man besided other cds that were not pigs to be around.

[joann07]

Last year, I was in NYC, for work, and a guy I used to work with took me around the city to check out the sights. We rode the cabs and the subway and had dinner and all. He paid for dinner one night, as well as for the transporation costs, and on another night we ate dinner and paid separately. I didn't treat it like a date, nor did he. I didn't feel attracted to him in any way, but he was very cool and treated me like a lady.
In all, it was just a great time.


Hugs!

[Kendra08]

When I'm dressed I fantasize about men more than I do when I'm in guy mode. I am attracted to women and other CDs and very curious about being with men. I think if asked on a date I'd do it.

[susan lewis]

I have gone on dates with men and being out in public with a man is such a thrill. I love people seeing me on the arms of a man and letting them think im his girlfriend or wife. My dates so far have been great. The men have been attentive and when they tell me how sexy and pretty I am, well Im putty in their hands from then on. Have to admit I love both women and men but when dressed im 100% female and have needs and wants that only a man can give a woman

[Persephone]

If I am going to present as a lady, then I am going to behave as a lady. It seems a bit unreasonable that we want to define our parameters so narrowly. This is okay, but that is not. I want to play dress up, but I don't want the responsibility of the consequences. I want to play house, but only within my comfort zone. I want to look like a woman, but not behave like one.

The above is terribly insensitive, but I don't understand the concept of just dabbling in this thing called femininity.

I agree! You are so right on!

[lucyuktv3]

i have never dated a man but would luv to when all made up i have spoken to guys on phone and on chat rooms and really enjoyed it and in clubs but never actually been on a date yet. . . . mwah lucy x

[Juliemckay]

I am a straight man and I hve never considered dating a man....


until very recently, that is.


On my last shopping trip (fully dressed, and in my new outfit), I noticed several guys checking me out. I don't believe they thought I was a man, because the were mostly checking out my boobs. I was quite a new feeling for me. I was flattered, confused, taken back, a little disgusted and a bit turned on, all at the same time. Now I'm not sure if I would date a man or not. I may date a man if the conditions were right and he knew I was a CDr... but the sex part has me confused. I don't thing I would "go all the way", but I may want to make out while dresses.

[sarab]

I've been with a man way back in my high school days, then didnt have any interest. Now that I'm embracing my female side, Id seriously consider a date and possibly more.

[Kelli Michelle]

When in male garb, I have absolutely no interest in men. When dressed as a female, I do feel drawn (don't know if attracted is the right word) to men more. I prefer women, but I suspect that if an attentive, attractive, interesting, funny guy engaged me in a conversation, I would be a least receptive. I could contempleate at least kissing, cuddling, etc. not sure how much more than that, but who knows? I guess en femme, i would be close to bi-sexual with a preference for women. But let's face it. I feel that everyone would be at least attentive to any person (male or female) who was appreciative, polite, etc. to you while dressed. No? I mean one could casually flirt without giving out bold " I want sex with you signals..."

This is sorta weird too. I would have more interest in a man than another CD . I see other CDs as friends really, I guess.

[Tracii G]

I dated a man for about a year we had a great relationship for the most part.
I met him at a party I was dressed he knew I was a guy right off.
He was a gay man all the way I am Bi for the record.
On dates when I would be dressed en femme he was very attentive and treated me like a lady which was such a turn on for me.
He tolerated me dressed but he preferred me in guy mode.
Our relationship ended because I was too girly inside thats what he said anyway.He is more the "hey look at me I'm gay" type flauting his sexual preference publicly which I find kind of rude in a way.
A lot of guys are pigs I'll agree with that statement.
I do flirt a little with guys to some extent when out enfemme with a smile or a turn round and look move as they pass by just like guys do when a pretty woman walks by.

[AmandaM]

Saying, "you're just impersonating one," is incredibly insensitive. Actually, it's incredibly offensive and insulting to every TS on this board, and to any of us that have the unfortunate fate of being stuck in the middle of the gender identity equation. Me? I don't know what the heck i am. Just don't tell me i'm "impersonating" anything.

Exactly. I've been diagnosed as a TV with TS tendencies. Actually, I believe I am a TS, since birth. But, I live as a married man who crossdresses, and I was a player in my 20's who dated tons of women. I too have felt desires to be with men when dressed to the nines. But, the idea of being my man-self with a man is a complete turn-off. When I am in man-mode, it's girls for me. As a woman? I could go for women first, TS/passable CDers second, and men depending on who he is (has to be extremely hot). Anyway, any desire of mine to have sex with "male equipped" people has to be when I am a woman. Any other idea turns me off. I tried it, I know. I am not gay.

[Juliemckay]

This whole dating men thing is very new to me, and quite frankly, has be a bit confused. I have zero inclination to date a guy while drab, but in drag I feel a bit differently. I have never had the chance to date a man, so I'm just guessing here. I love the attention I get and would be more than willing to do things like share a drink or dance with a man (while in drag only). If it progressed farther than that I have no idea what I would really do.

Oddly, even when underdressed I have no desire for closeness to a man, only when fully dresssed. I'm currently sitting in a office full of men and I'm wearing a red satin cami, matching red satin bikini panties and panty hose under my boy garb, and nothing. The last time I was out fully dressed (Monday) I notice a couple of guys checking out my boobs (they are quite nice), and this started me thinking....

[Chrissy8888]

This topic does come up every couple of months. Here is just my opinion on this topic.

Like many of you I have strong feelings of what it would be like to be fully dressed and on a date with a man. Years ago I was very confused by these feelings. Troubled may be a better term. Then as I got older and the internet becoming more popular I realized that I was not alone. Many people feel this way. This is where I am going to assert my opinion. I think more than anything cross-dresser or not we as humans need validation. We also need companionship. For many cross-dressers, me included, we want to at least feel like women, or men, depending on your sex. That being said some cross-dressers (not all) become validated that way when a man pays attention to them. All of that being said I also think that people truly want to be cared for by one person. Some people are strongly heterosexual, some are strongly homosexual, some are bi-sexual and I think some are truly in the middle of the road all the way around. They just and to be loved and to love someone else.

I have experimented with a guy before nothing extremely overt (we didn’t go all the way). I was worried that I would be a head case after the experience. However it was just different, not good or bad, just different. So I think an open mind is really what is important. Well and safety, safety, SAFETY.

[Michelle8]

I would never consider going out with a man in guy mode.
But dressed as a women I would definetly go.To get to feel
sexy and feminine would be a dream come true.If he was hot
i would love to have a boyfriend

[Stephanie81]

Well, this is an interesting and oft discussed topic.. After reading all the posts on this topic it is clear to me that there are a wide variety of opinions on the subject, and I think in the end it comes down to who you are, or in fact, who you percieve yourself to be, or even want to be. For many people this appears to be a very confusing thing.

Many of you on here appear to identify as a "Straight" CD, which is completely valid, although I do think the whole Straight, Gay or Bi thing is not as black and white as people like to make out.. To me, it is more like "shades of grey".

As for myself, I identify as Gay, and have done ever since puberty, and have been out of the closet for a while now.. I'm also a Cross Dresser, and I dress in female clothes about 50% of the time, at home and in public, so I'm out of the closet in that respect also.

I have only ever dated men, and frankly I couldn't imagine dating a woman.

Which brings me to another interesting point:

Guess what? Gay guys are into guys/masculinity/men not men that are into dressing like women or women clothes of being feminine. They absolutely hate it more so than a GG!

That isn't actually accurate.. Many Gay guys, prefer "pretty boys", or Drag Queens (like myself).. men with a more feminine outlook.. (I speak from personal experience!) It all comes down to personal preference..

Great topic though, like I said!!

[epsxyblkm]

I would have to say that is one of the things that I struggle with when I am dressed.

But to give the answer, yes. I have been with a Man when dressed.

It is hard to feel sexy, and not want that validation.

[Lorileah]

I have gone out with both men and women and even a lesbian. It makes you feel special when a man opens the door and helps you out of the car. Haven't made it to the third date yet where you have to decide if you are going to sleep with him

[kristyk]

:battingeyelashesSomtime after high school when I started living on my own I wondered if I would know how a woman would act if I was to be dressed as Kristy and had the opportunity to spend time with a man on a date, and I dated girls growing up never thought about dating a man.

My first time on a date I was a little nervous I ended up feeling so comfortable it was like no other date I had ever been on with any girl. I was a little apprehensive a little nervous but I remember more thananything I just couldn't quit smiling I can still hear Roy saying "what is so funny".



I am new so if I rambled to much I am sorry
KristyK

[Billijo49504]

I met a CD'er and his wife at a rest stop, he was very submissive and so was his wife. They both came to meet me. They both bowed down for me, dressed as a girl. And actually he was better than she was....BJ

[Hosed]

Men? No, but other CDs? Definatly, I've had an encounter with another CD before and would enjoy it again. The best part was watching someone else dress, all the lil' things that go unnoticed when you dress become so very interesting, say like straightening the seam on stockings.

[Crissy Kay]

On the flip side, I think that I would enjoy going out on a date with a cd, me being en drab!!! But then its the same problem I have had with women anyway, what cder would want to go out with me!!!!! LOL!!!!!

[Sherry-Stephanie]

I've read some of these posts and find the varying opinions interesting....also notice that this thread has had some 5,000+ views which tells me there's a whole lot of interested in this topic....

However, at the end of the day wether your dropping your pants or raising your skirt it's still guy on guy sex should it go that far and that ='s gay sex....not hetrosexual....so one or both of the people involved is either gay or bisexual....not that that is the issue here....I enjoy doing the female things with a guy as much as I enjoy doing the guy thing with the females...my gate swings both ways as they say...doing it in a dress or a two piece suit is irrelelvant to my justification or desire to do it....

Being bi-sexual myself being with a guy whether I'm in male mode or dressed as a female (BTW I haven't dated or been with a guy in CD mode) isn't the core issue..if your willing to be with a guy (sexually) dressed as a female then it shouldn't matter either if your with a guy dressed in female mode.

Just my opinion/view on this...and no one has to put a hill of beans to it as well....but I also think that as we dress femme it's a logical and natural question or though for us girls to ask ourselves "I winder what it's liek to be with a guy....and then take it one step further and ask what sex would be like as a girl with a guy....I find that more normal that if we're a girl and wanting to be a guy (performing as the male) with another CD'er...that I can't understand....

[Kelsy]

[QUOTE=Nicki B;1554235]Well, for a start, some of us here feel that some of the time, at least, it's more like we're impersonating men QUOTE]


Nicki,

I ,for one, have always felt that being male was a role I've played and not all that successfully at that! Being outwardly male was always at odds with who I felt I was inside! Two spirited!

Kelsy

[MarciManseau]

[QUOTE=Kelsy;1562530]

Well, for a start, some of us here feel that some of the time, at least, it's more like we're impersonating men QUOTE]


Nicki,

I ,for one, have always felt that being male was a role I've played and not all that successfully at that! Being outwardly male was always at odds with who I felt I was inside! Two spirited!

Kelsy

It was always a role I tried to play until I was 14, and then I realized that everyone thought I was a girl, including me. Even when I was out in public trying to look like a boy, I was always mistaken for a girl.

Hugs, Marci