Nightmare

[laura.lapinski]

I just woke up from a horrible dream. I dreamed I was dressed up in a blue dress, had no wig, and I was going out places with family and friends. There was a restaurant high on a hill. It was some kind of special dinner with my kids, other family and some people at work. There were other places I went too, but the bottom line is I felt so uncomfortable and embarrassed being dressed like that. Also, I felt I wanted to change back into my Levis, but for some reason, I couldn't, which just added to my uncomfortableness. Nobody said anything to me, but there was no doubt that there were side conversations going on.

I think this dream is a testament as to why I am in the closet, and have no desire to come out. It underlines the end of the CD spectrum I reside at. No big deal. It's just the way things are, and I am comfortable with that. I have analyzed things deeply for a long time, and I understand a lot at this point, but for a long time I wasn't certain. It's nice to come to some clarity. I know this post is probably not helpful to anyone, but I was browsing, and I felt I should write about it since it was so intense. Thanks for "listening."

Laura

P.S. I understand dream interpretation a little bit (read some books), and I do believe we can learn from our dreams. I don't remember ever dreaming about being dressed--good dream or bad--which is why this dream was so strange. I am not ashamed of what I do, I accept that I am who I am--whatever that is. I am in the closet for the same reasons KimberyTX stated--with an extension of that to my siblings and in laws. Yes it would be embarrassing to come out, but I have embraced and enjoyed CDing over the years in a personal way. I don't have my own stash, but in the past I've had a few things (never a whole wardrobe). There have been some other stressful things (non CD related) going on in my life this past year, but I am mostly through all of that. FWIW, I had some horrible violent dreams of being shot (and my nephew who was with me also being shot at) by some Russians back when I was 18 (must have been after watching Red Dawn) that invoked some of the same stressful feelings.

Thanks for all your replies.
Laura

[jessielee]

dear Laura,
so sorry to read. but you are not alone. i have nervous dreams of being caught, especially my stash.
but inside, somehow, i feel no guilt nor shame. my female dreams are not of me dressing femme but being naturally gg.
which "knows" better? my subconscious or my genes?

[mklinden2010]

>>>I dreamed I was dressed up in a blue dress, had no wig, and I was going out places with family and friends. There was a restaurant high on a hill. It was some kind of special dinner with my kids, other family and some people at work. There were other places I went too, but the bottom line is I felt so uncomfortable and embarrassed being dressed like that. Also, I felt I wanted to change back into my Levis, but for some reason, I couldn't, which just added to my uncomfortableness.


Wow.

Just wake up next time!

I think I see the first problem:

"All dressed up" - and no wig?

Huh.

How's that work?

Sounds like my wife's worry that she's left home without her glasses or laptop and has to go straight to an important meeting.

Next time, before you go to sleep, make sure you pick out all the stuff you need to have a NICE dream...

Oh, and here's the second problem:

"With family and friends"?

Come on, you can do better than that!

Leave the kids at home and dream up one of the Vegas shows!

Restaurant dreams?

Who has FUN at restaurants?

Yeah, go Vegas!

[TxKimberly]

I used to have nightmares like that until I decided I wasn't ashamed of what I am. The only thing that keeps me in the closet at work and at home is that I don't want to risk my job or cause problems for my children (IE - being picked on at school). These are good and solid reasons for keeping a lid on it, but I am not at all ashamed or embarrassed about what I am today. It was not always that way and I did used to have nightmares like that on a regular basis

[Karren H]

Yeah what Kim said... Except I've never really had a nightmare about crossdressing!! Matter of fact I really don't dream about crossdressing at all.. Figure I don't need to dream about it cause I'm living my dream!!

[Desiree2bababe]

I love it when "Desiree" enters my dreams, happens quite often. Alot of them involve my high school buddies, some my wife, some random men. I enjoy them all, good or bad.

[JoAnne Wheeler]

I dream a lot about CDing - somethimes they are good dreams and sometime, like yours, they are almost nightmares. I don't profess to understand why.

Love,

JoAnne Wheeler

[StacyCD]

Not to try to be a dream analyst but I think that once you have really accepted the femme part of yourself as being a part of you, I think your whole outlook changes and possibly your dreams! If you are not comfortable with your crossdressing then of course it can be a nightmare. I used to really worry about being outed by teenage girls but I've become comfortable enough with myself that if someone sees me as a guy in a dress--that's their problem and not mine. I have a right to wear whatever I want and expect to be treated respectively.

[Nicole Erin]

Most of my CD dreams I am in a nightgown and in my old high school trying to hide from everyone, even though no one really notices me.

[Kate Simmons]

Well, usually my dreams and nightmares are lucid which means I control them. Not good for the poor sucker in there who gets on my bad side, ya know?

[docrobbysherry]

THAT'S how I would feel in real life, if I dressed without my special faces!

[jennifer41356]

I have had dreams like that, but in my case no one seemed to care I was wearing a dress. i was aware I wasnt looking like a woman, but everyone seemed not to notice

[nvlady]

I used to have a dream that I had gone to work and discovered that I was wearing a dress.

[Shari]

I've had many dreams throughout my life of being dressed in public and feeling very anxious about it, so worried that someone will chastise me for it or worse. There's never anyone in it that I know.
Funny thing is that nobody bothers me or ever really notices.
Still, it's an exciting feeling and I always awake with a sort of longing or yearning to dream that dream again.
It's not only the clothing. The element of danger and of being discovered are quite stimulating.

[Slip Affinity]

Dreams we have are usually symbolic and don't necessarily relate to what the dream is about. The best thing to do is look up some info on the meaning of certain things in your dreams.

[Raychel]

I am with you Laura, I have certainly had those sort of dreams in the past. Being caught at work wearing just womens lingerie for me. Why the hell I would be at work in just underwear is beyond me. But that is dreams for you.

The dreams are mostly gone for me now, very rarely do I dream about dressing anymore. Kinda too bad, Some of them I really enjoyed. Some not so much.