If she knew, how accepting/supporting was your mother?

[Lorileah]

I think my mom set me up from the beginning. She put a box of her underwear in my closet for storage (like I would not get in it and play with it...right) so I had a girdle and bras and panties in my adolecence. She dressed me completely for halloween right down to the panties.

She suppoerted me in my chioce of hobbies like dance (didn't last long enough there) and sports that were considered feminine (I played field hockey and volleyball at high levels).

And yet she acts like she does not like me dressed...and then sends my androgenous clothing and accessories

Best answer here would be she secretly wanted a girl and i am happy to fill the position.

Still waiting for the good answer why guys cant wear skirts. I have the legs

[Lainie]

Mom used to leave her shoes by the backdoor, and I often would slip them on when I took out the trash, when I was a young teen and our feet were the same size. She was amused, didn't mind.

I tried on some of her underwear in secret also, but never got caught. I don't know if she noticed--I tried to put things back exactly.

She loved me unconditionally, but I guess she would have been disappointed about me dressing fully en femme. I didn't actually do that until after she died, but I sometimes think it would have been nice to have spent some time with her as her daughter.

[iwearstockings]

mum found my stash which was then comprised of stuff i'd stolen when babysitting for family friends and actually a pair of her heels. She never mentioned it but did put the heels back in her wardrobe. Its strange really , its been unsaid between us but obviously she knows that at the age 14 at least I was a transvestite.

[Satrana]

My mom was physically sick when she found me in bed wearing a nightie. She nearly threw me out of the house then and there and never spoke about it ever again. A couple of years later my stash vanished but she never battered an eye and of course I was not going to question her what happened to it. I never trusted her again after that and stopped thinking of her as "mom" and saw her for who she really was.

[RachelDenise]

Mom found my stash once and left me a note that said to get rid of it. At least she didn't throw it away herself. To this day we've never talked and I still dress. I don't know if she ever found my things again after I moved them rather than throwing them away, but no more notes while I was living at home.

[DameErrant]

My Mom caught me a few times and immediately went and told my Dad. She was hinkier on the subject than he was, and he was totally unaccepting. But then, I was never good enough in any area. Took me quite some time to build a real relationship with my parents, and that required keeping some things to myself. Did they ever know the real me? Doubt it.

[Chari]

My mother forced me to start wearing my older sisters clothes when I was about 4 years old. I was always smaller than all the boys my age and would get teased everyday for being a "sissy". Mother demanded I learn to clean the house, wash/dry dishes, do laundry, ironing, and always had to be dressed as a girl when I did these chores. As hard as I tried I could never please my mother - other than being dressed as a girl. This ritual went on for many years, and I became her "sissy maid". Took many more years of therapy to face these problems. Maybe this is why I CD today.

[Carroll]

I told my mom, and basically she told me she'd love me no matter what, however she doesnt understand and she dont want to see

[Angie G]

My mom has been gone 16 years now and never knew if she had I think she would have been OK with it.
Angie

[sherib]

My mother never knew but if she had I would have been thrown out of the house. Then my mother would have prayed for me because I was a pervert.

[DonnaT]

On occassion, I would put on one of my mom's bras and sneak around the downstairs, while she was home, to see if she'd catch me. I think I wanted her to catch me and make me dress.

And she did catch me. told me to take it off. Later, she told my dad. He tried to question me, but it was just about dinner time, and i wasn't about to open up with all my brothers hanging around.

It wasn't brought up again.

I had a pretty good stash in the mattress tick, which turned up missing while I was away at Army basic training. I can only hope it was my mother who found it, probably when she went to wash the tick. But no one ever mentioned the find.

A couple of years ago, I was showing my mom pictures on my camera. One was of a previous avatar.

She asked who the person was, and I eventually owned up to it.

It took her a while to believe me, and then asked why. So I told her the whole story. She still didn't own up to finding my stash back in the 70's. Probably put it out of her mind, if it was her that found it.

Anyway, since then she's given me dresses, shoes and jewelry, as if I was the daughter she never had.

[bgirl]

When I was a teen my mother asked me why I never brought a girl home to meet her. That was enough to make her think I was gay. She was relieved when I got married. I dont think she would have been supportive, but I think she would have accepted. I never got the chance to find out.
She did know my dad had found me in her clothes and make-up when I was 7 and never brought it up.

[LeotardMan]

I was lucky, my mom was very accepting. She caught me a few times and than she finally knew and was accepting of it. I never really flaunted it I did it and still many do it in the privacy of my home or do it discreetly outside so she was accepting of it.

Geoff

[ruthie801]

My mom caught me or should I say she set me up to catch me. I was 15 at the time and had been dressing in her things since I was 13 it started trying things on from the hamper and progressed to complete dress ups in her bedroom when she was out. Well one day she said she would be out all day, I of course thought I would be alone most of the day. I was wearing a old evening dress of hers with complete woman’s undergarments, as I was in her bathroom applying mascara she appeared in the door way. She said she knew I was into her things for awhile especially since her cosmetics was being used. She told me that I shouldn’t be doing this and that was the most scolding I received. She was more upset I didn't wear her old things in the bottom drawer. There was never anything but sheets there, She then left for the day of shopping she had intended well after she caught me there was dresses, bras, etc in that bottom drawer. wow mothers.

[JulieC]

My mother discovered my small stash of pantyhose (stupidly hidden underneath my mattress) when I was 13. She didn't confront me straight away. I just came home one day to find they were missing from my hiding spot. Sometime later, she sat me down in the den and had a fire and brimstone Bible thumping talk with me, or rather at me as I barely spoke a word.

This did not have the effect she desired. I simply figured out considerably better hiding spots. One of them was in the cold air return vent in my room. Remove the cover, put small bag of stuff in vent so it is out of sight looking into the vent, replace cover. This was such a good hiding spot that I found a pair of pantyhose in a bag in the vent some years after I moved out of the house.

The major downside of this was that this lecture by her tought me to repress the expression of my true self. It helped to increase the guilt factor I had in crossdressing. It had a role in a few purges. It had a role in me not talking to anyone else about my crossdressing until more than a decade later. It took two decades before I began...began...to accept myself.

My mother did the best she could in a trying situation for her. She used what tools she had to handle the situation. She just didn't know and didn't understand. In a day and age before the Internet, obtaining information about crossdressing was essentially impossible.

Today, things are different. If a child of mine crossdresses, my reaction will be entirely different than my mother's, for a variety of reasons.

[AKKaren]

[SIZE="3"]My mom found out and totally went nuts. I was beaten, screamed at and thrown out of the house to live with my step family who found out from her. Happy memories![/SIZE]

[Carly D.]

My mum found my stash when I was 14 or so, and threw it all away when I was off at school. Maybe she hoped to nip it in the bud, but -- Epic Fail! She never said anything about it, but I've never felt like I could trust her with anything since. So, we've never talked about it.

They tell parents to be nosy with their teenagers, but in too many cases, it's not worth the loss of trust.

I could quote just about everyone here to a certain extent.. but my mom found my stash (such as it was) a few times and never talked to me about it.. I took that hint as her way of telling me to keep it to myself.. which I have.. it's these little things like this that keep me from telling anyone.. the idea that if I tell then the genie is out of the bottle and there is absolutely no going back.. no matter how I felt in the past at times thinking I could maybe tell someone now or now.. or now.. the truth is "now" seems way out of reach.. maybe never is closer than now ever will be.

[beenherelongtime]

my mother never found out although the first time i dressed for halloween she let me wear one of my sisters blouse and my moms jumper and panties and slip. none of their bras would fit as they were small busted and even though i was skinny by guy sizes, i was bigger than them. i digress, i do think if i told my mom, she would have been upset, as at that time i was her favorite, but she might have supported me as she was a great lady. my father was killed when i was 12, so at this time it was only my sisters and me.

But I would not have been able to dress fully as none of their clothes would fit and we could not afford to buy for me.

[Sara48]

Talk to her. Sounds as if she could be one of your best friends

[Lisa Golightly]

Oh she was ok about the crossdressing... Apart from bras... She had this thing about me wearing them... doesn't like it (odd really... anyway I have to now). My transsexuality is different... She really doesn't want to think about that... Vaginas and boyfriends are topics that are just not broached... *sigh*

[TSchapes]

My mom just passed away this last year. I'm 55 and I told her and dad when I was 28 years old. They were surprised, but very supportive.

Before I went to the Southern Comfort Conference this last year I had printed up some business cards with Tracy's picture on it. I told my mom about how I was going to the conference and showed her my pictures.

My 84 year old mom looked at them and said, "very cute, nice legs!" I told her I got those from her. That's how we rolled...

I think a lot of parents would be understanding if you "JUST TOLD THEM"!

-Tracy

[Toni_Lynn]

The answer to this is short and not-so-sweet. Not one damn bit! She abused me emotionally over it and the scars are still there 40 years later.

I have often asked how a mother, who is to be a paragon of love when it comes to her child could be so cruel. The answer still escapes me.

I sound like a broken record on this, but I still have to say it - -my wife makes all the pain go away with her love acceptance

Huggles

Toni-Lynn

[Jess_cd32]

Mine doesn't know and I see no reason to tell her now at her age.
If she did, hmmm I think she'd be very shocked at first, then accepting.
She's always supported us no matter what, we got lucky getting our Mom

[Jennifer Silverstone]

Up until I left home at the age of 18 the only female clothes I had access to were my mother's. She caught me a couple of times when I was about 13-14, and was mainly angry about me taking her clothes. She wasn't very happy about the CDindg either and mainnly resorted to a (mercifully short) outburst of shouting at me. Never spoke about it directly after that. I'm 39 now and she moved in with me seven years ago. During this time we have only indirectly discussed the subject of female clothes in terms of criticising what people wear on tv, on the street, general fashion etc. Also in terms of what suits her as the mail order catalogue in the house is in my name, so I have to order for her (and myself). I also buy a lot of second hand stuff on ebay so I have a large wardrobe of my own and she hasn't been in my room for years. Whenever Trans girls even get mentioned on television she yakes a mocking tone about them, considering them legitimate targets for ridicule. Much as I would dearly love to have her accept me for who I am, I think she comes from a generation (she is 71) for which this would be a step too far. I know others will have parents from that generation who reacted differently, but that's just how it is. The fear of rejection and ridicule is probably also the reason why I have remained resolutely single all my life, I know a lot of women are accepting an supportive, but it's impossible to tell beforehand, and I tend to take the safe option. I know that makes me a coward, but I have enough problems with self loathing (not CD related) to make this a minor issue.

[Tizabet]

My parents never knew while I was growing up (I didn't have much physical evidence to hide, because I was trying to deny it myself at the time). But I told them recently. It would be a little hard to hide a full transition eventually, so might as well lessen the shock, right? One they actually understood the extent of what I was saying, the first thing they did was apologized that they'd made me feel like I couldn't tell them earlier.

It was kind of weird, actually. I know that should have made me happy, but it also sort of pissed me off for at first. The realization that I could have been doing something about it decades earlier if my dad hadn't had such an aura of "do things the right way". I brought that up a few days later, and he explained it had all been pretend to try and keep me well behaved. He told me there were a lot of times when I was "in trouble" that he was having a really hard time sounding mad, because inside he was laughing his ass off, proud of what I'd done. Suddenly everything in my life made so much more sense...

Anyways, even though I wasn't expecting it, they've both turned out to be really accepting and supportive. I have to agree with Tracy. Give them a chance. You might be pleasantly surprised. <3