Told my sister a few weeks ago I was crossdressing. Even sent her couple of pix and she was amazed at how good I looked. So I've been able to openly talk to her about my feelings and she's been very helpful keeping my thoughts straight.
I was looking forward to shopping and see a movie as Anne this weekend. Well, sis calls and asks if I want to go shopping and see a movie with her. I got all excited, thinking she wanted Anne with her. When I hinted to what my weekend plans were, She said, "I'm not ready to see my older brother as a woman yet. Will you be ok with that?" I was a little disheartened, but didn't let it show, "Of course I'm ok with that."
So we shopped and talked. She started shopping for girl clothes. I told her I have a hard time shopping for girl stuff in "man mode". I can't explain why. Lot's of other CDers have no problem. Shopping for girl stuff in man mode doesn't feel right, but feels great in Anne mode. So she says, "I'm sorry. I'm just not quite ready to go shopping with my new big sister."
I thought, "Did you just infer to me as your 'big sister'?" A huge, but hesitant smile ran across my face. She saw that and smiled back. We continued talking thru the day about lot's of stuff, but mostly about me dressing and wanting to be feminine. I mentioned I've been having hard time coming out of "pink fog." Told her starting to really think about transitioning. She recommended I just take things one day at a time. I said, "Yup. That's what I'm doing."
So. Her comment referring to me as her "big sister" just keeps floating thru my mind. However, I don't want to force her acceptance. She's already supported me in more ways than I ever thought any family member would.
Next week we're going to see The Hobbit. Hope she wants to to be introduced to Anne, her "new big sister".
