For those of you who may have followed the relationship events in my life this thread may not come as a surprise. I throw this out there in the hopes that I can get some sage advice.

The other day my wife asked me to go out to lunch with her. In the middle of the lunch she asks me - "When do you want to sell the house?" - to which I replied - "Whatever do you mean?".

The rest of the conversation revolved around that opening statement. She said that clearly I was not going to stop CDing and she will never accept it and so she wanted to know when we should sell the house and separate. I said to her that I felt that we should go to more counselling in the new year to which she responded, to what end? She said that she was never going to change her mind about CDing. She asked, what is the purpose of going and I said to work through our relationship issues including my CDing and to get her to open her mind just a little bit and try to understand.

Later in the conversation she said that perhaps it would be the wrong time to sell the house and split up because her mother is living with us and she did not want to uproot her, better she said to wait until she passes on. She also said that one of the issues with staying together was that I wanted to have sex (hmmm - amazing her sense of perception in what one expects from a married relationship) and she said that she did not want that anymore because sex is not important at this age (her 55, me 48 - I did not realize there was an expiry date) and that the only reason that I wanted sex anyway was for validation (of what? I said I enjoyed the intimacy).

Anyway the conversation continued to go in this peculiar way and then she asked me if I had started seeing anyone else and I said emphatically NO. and I asked her if she was seeing someone and she said she never wants to have a mate again because they are too much trouble.

So, by the end of the conversation, I told her that I still cared for her, wanted to find some way to make this work (she said sure as friends if I can accept that - I said I could not) and somehow managed to get her across the goal line of agreeing to going to further counselling.

From that point until now she has been, for the most part, very lovey dovey with me, saying hon this and babe that and hugging me and yet I know she is still thinking separation.

I am so damn confused about all of this. Has anyone ever been in a situation like this before and somehow managed to a) stay in the relationship b) been able to get acceptance of the cross dressing and c) resume normal intimacy? I am looking for guidance. I feel like I am losing my mind over this.

Ahhhhhh

Melissa