I get so depressed when I eventually have to revert back to being male.
I try and squeeze every last moment. I probably dress up 4 times a week;
but its never enough!
How about you?
xo KatT
I get so depressed when I eventually have to revert back to being male.
I try and squeeze every last moment. I probably dress up 4 times a week;
but its never enough!
How about you?
xo KatT
I agree, especially when my makeup is done perfect and I look amazing to my eye. I hate it.
Very true. It seems like no matter how much I get to dress, I am always looking for more.
my sister's reply when I told her how I prefer to dress
"Everyone has there thing, all that matters is that you are happy, love what you do and who you do it with"
Going back to male is equivalent to Mondays.
Maybe it's a good thing that crossdressing is so much work, because if it weren't, I would probably feel like you do. I do feel very happy when I'm dressed, but I couldn't spend that much time putting on make up etc. if I did it every day.
I was like that, Kat. It got so bad that I felt physically sick every time I had to dress as a man.
Luckily I haven't had that problem since 1st July.
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This above all: To thine own self be true, And it must follow, as the night the day, Thou canst not then be false to any
Galileo said "You cannot teach a man anything" and they accuse ME of being sexist
Never ascribe to malice that which can be easily explained by sheer stupidity
I've become accustom to having almost daily six to seven hours of dressing time, M-F. I view it as the end of the day. I dress in a pretty dress and all the appropriate undergarments. So, it's as if I came home from my old 8-5 job and get comfortable in jeans and my holey tee shirts- god my wife hates those tee shirts. But, I will say, when I do have an annual 24/7 for 7-10 days, it is really tough putting everything away. When I do get that annual treat, I break out scores of hangers and hang my dresses and favorite slips in the closet. The male underwear draw is emptied into boxes and the hosiery, panties and girdles and bras make it into the draws.
Unhooking the bra and taking off the makeup.
Hi .
Im seeing this detail a bit different than i did before in as much i hated male clothes for years like 50. yet i had to wear them tho as a builder i changed from that so called male to woman & still did building work as a woman ,
in the evenings i was most of the time dressed as a woman so changing clothes was shorts & a tee for work & skirts & tops in the evening allmost every day for 3 years now of cause iv no male clothes, gave them away.
...noeleena..
Last edited by noeleena; 12-19-2010 at 05:45 AM.
I get depressed all the time when in male mode.... waking up and having to spend an entire day in drab is like a friggen drug withdrawal.. I'm not the same... even my wife feels/sees it and tells me "go get dressed.. you're miserable"
I honestly can say I'm definitely not the same person I was before.. My whole life has changed.. everything is different... I wasn't particularly a happy person before as a man, but now, I'm actually MORE depressed and the ONLY thing that gets rid of it is being fully dressed.. it's the only time I'm actually comfortable and at peace..
It's like I'm addicted and being a girl is some sort of super heroin
Last edited by LitaKelley; 12-19-2010 at 07:23 AM.
I've had issues in the past in switching back but curiously, it hasn't been so bad lately...until last weekend.
I sent these messages to a friend last Sunday in reference to my day-into-evening on Saturday. There are two messages merged here. The last paragraph was actually sent to my friend Kim, letting her know I got home safe after the long drive but also to share some feelings I had the night before. I then sent Kim's message to another friend, adding the first two paragraphs to put the whole thing into context a bit.
...It speaks to a lot of my feelings yesterday, particularly when it came time to take the girl off. I guess something that could seem kind of trivial to any other woman can be traumatic for one who identifies towards the TS side of things. You might remember in the various Christine writings where her friends would tell of her literally rolling up in a ball on the floor in tears when it came time to "switch back". I guess it's all we have to hold on to. The trappings of our outward appearance validates the femininity in our heart, soul & at the core of our very being.
Not to worry, I'm not at the point where Christine was. I have had the benefit of understanding a lot about myself from a pretty young age and then taking measured steps as I get older. Still, I think you will see the bittersweet mixture of happy and sad.
I rolled in at about 10:15 and didn't take any of the girl off before arriving home. I went into the bedroom and slipped off my flats, like any other woman would do after a long day out. Honestly, it was wonderful to not have to remove the girl on the fly, to return home as myself. I then looked into the mirror and smiled in satisfaction about the evening, I guess like any other woman might do. Dress came off and i put on my sweatpants & t-shirt, leaving my feminine shape as-is and went into the bathroom to take off the makeup. Returned to my room and finally took off my bra & hose. There was a strong feeling of sadness at that point. My breasts should be real, my jammies shouldn't be guy-sweats. Heck, to always be able to return home feeling happy, beautiful and positively feminine...
Lately, I feel myself fumbling in the dark, trying to find that middle path that I need to find contentment on.
Like a corpse deep in the earth I'm so alone, restless thoughts torment my soul, as fears they lay confirmed, but my life has always been this way - Virginia Astley, "Some Small Hope" (1986)
Sunlight falls, my wings open wide. There's a beauty here I cannot deny - David Sylvian, "Orpheus" (1987)
I very rarely go all male but when I do have too it can be very depressing.
After undergoing the total transformation and makeover and all the work Jamie puts into the makeup to make Ashlee possible the worst part is having to undress and wash all that stuff off to look up and see "him" in the mirror. So depressing.
Agreed. Having to take off all the makeup, nail polish, etc when it comes time to go back to male mode is downright depressing =/
i agree!!!!
i hate to go back to male mode!!!!! the worst part is that now i'm totally dressed and i'll have to go back to male mode in 30 minutes
enjoy while you can!!!!
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I have to agree also. If I'm not dressed when my GF gets home she will tell me to go get comfortable. I really hate getting dressed for work.
usually waking up and having to get out of my nightgown is the saddest part of my day.
What should I do today?
I agree - I don't like Mondays!!!!
I can't say I get depressed, but I can't say I have ever looked forward to it. By contrast, I cannot wait to dress, and I dress almost daily. Must be something in my genes.
Last edited by Mary Morgan; 12-19-2010 at 01:59 PM.
The amount of time I need to spend as him. I have been stuck in male mode for a week know, and I am loosing my mind. This is due to where work put's us up. Normally I would be my self from when I get home till the next morning.
A prisoner in a kings disguise - Styx
I haven't gotten depressed but I have certainly felt like something was missing. For the last year I've been more comfortable underdressing at work so now in the mornings it is much more fulfilling to pick out a matching bra and panties then add my small forms and go off to work quite happy.
I don't really get depressed (sad maybe) but I stretch my en femme time as long as possible before changing back to male mode.
Hugs, Carole