Hi everyone. I wish health, luck, and love.
I m 30 years old, I m a model (good looking) and the guy I liked appeared to me from the beggining (of our dating) as a woman. I accepted it, because I thought that love is above everything. I already knew him as a man for 2 years. I thought that yin has a bit of yang, and yang has a bit of yin. So he (yang) is expressing his "yin" side, as I also express my "yang" side sometimes (not through cross-dressing). So it sounded fair to me. I ended up making love to him all the time, having the active, male role almost everytime we had sex. I felt so rejected as a woman. Never felt so bad before, so much heartbroken. I didn t show him/her I didn t like it. In fact, sometimes I liked it, (after getting drunk), but I made an effort to like it.
It was like I was forced to be a lesbian.
I had no motivation to become more beautiful, to put make up etc. He did all that for himself. He had already found satisfaction in himself.
The last times we had sex I felt so depressed that, during sex, I was asking god to help me somehow and give me strenght to copy with that and make this thing end with a miracle.. One day we had sex as a "normal" couple, and it felt sooo nice, I almost secretely started crying because I had missed it so much, so much.. to feel like a woman.. As I was enjoying it, he turned to me and said "that s how I want you to make love to me". It was so turning off..
One day, after 3 years, I couldn t take it any more, so I asked him to break up.
Now I feel that I can never have sex again, and never fall in love again. Yin usually fells in love with yang. It is like magnets, north poles attract south poles, etc.
This whole thing made me feel like the world has only women and men who want to be women. So, falling in love with a man seems a utopia, it would be like I deceive myself.
My question is, you guys enjoy this, but does it really worth the pain you put us through?