interesting comparison

[lynnef]

Apparently according to my wife - Crossdressing == Herpes (or other STD) in terms of severity...


A little background: wife and I were having a discussion about one of her friends who married a man who had genital herpes (and didn't tell her about it until they were already married) and I kind of jokingly said "aren't you happy I told you about myself at the beginning?" she basically said " it's about the same thing..."
me - "even though I told you at the beginning?"
her- "yes"
me:

Aah well... just another viewpoint some of us may have to live with

[Saoirse]

Last I heard, XD'ing wasn't communicable.

[Tina B.]

Might be just another viewpoint, but it's a harsh one. As far as I know, no one has ever caught crossdressing from me!
Tina B.

[lynnef]

yeah, I just thought it was a bit of an extreme stance to take :|

[Speck]

Did you spend any time trying to understand specifically what she saw as being the similarities? If so, what insight did she provide? I can't imagine that she thinks CDing is a communicable disease... If you didn't ask for specifics, why not?

Speck

[TGMarla]

It's a sex-related anomaly that she has to put up with the rest of your life. I see the correlation.

[sissystephanie]

Marla, I don't see a correlation at all. First of all, any STD is very definitely sex related! But crossdressing is not, at least not in all cases! Many of us, myself included, dress simply because we like to! The second thing is that STD's are physical disorders of the body! Crossdressing MAY be a mental disorder, but is not a physical disorder in any way! I said CD'ing may be a mental disorder because even psychiatrists and psychologists cannot agree on that!! I don't think of my CD'ing as a mental disorder, but just as something I like to do!!

But you definitely right about one thing! Unless Lynne changes his mind, his wife is going to have to put up with his crossdressing for a long time!!

[TGMarla]

I know Steph, but look at it from her point of view. You and I know that they're apples and oranges, but not everyone sees it that way. It's still something she associates as sexual, and she has to deal with it for the rest of her life.

[Marissa]

It's a sex-related anomaly that she has to put up with the rest of your life. I see the correlation.

Without further questions as to 'exactly' what she meant..I would agree with Marla. Don't think she meant it was communicable, but the idea that the 'condition' affects both parties.

[Fab Karen]

she basically said " it's about the same thing..."
me - "even though I told you at the beginning?"
her- "yes"

Ask her what she means by "the same thing" - is she saying crossdressing is as bad as a sexual disease? Or is she just saying it's another case of important information about the partner needing to be communicated from the beginning?

[lynnef]

From what I could understand it seemed as if she thought it was as bad as a sexual disease, which the partner wasn't informed about until it was too late, which actually seems like she thinks it's _worse_ than an std. (as I *did* tell her at the beginning, when we first started the relationship, and she was moderately ok with it then....)

[Michelle 51]

I love to dress as a women and sometimes ( well most of the time)even think how nice it would be to be one but I have to admit that I don't look at things as they do.After 36 yrs together my wife and I can be miles apart on most issues.I'm not saying I'm right and shes wrong because thats not the case but I still get amazed how we view things so different.

[docrobbysherry]

"Herpes is the same as CDing?"

If a GG told me that on our date nite, there WOULDN'T be another!

[marny]

Without further questions as to 'exactly' what she meant..I would agree with Marla. Don't think she meant it was communicable, but the idea that the 'condition' affects both parties.

The condition is that in either circumstance, sex just went out the window.

[Violetgray]

There is one HUGE important difference between crossdressing and herpes, and it's this:

Crossdresser gets married to a woman and they have a divorce, then she doesn't have to deal with the crossdressing anymore.

If they get married and he gives her herpes, then guess what--She still has herpes when they divorce.

[eluuzion]

hiya Lynnef,

That was a good one. The mind can be an interesting place, eh??


Your story reminded me of this...

"To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other"
-Jack Handy

[Sophie86]

The condition is that in either circumstance, sex just went out the window.

That would be sad. I'm glad my wife doesn't feel that way about it.

[Pythos]

That's not interesting.

That is down right rude, and thoughtless.

[kimdl93]

While I'd agree that its something both partners have to live with, the STD analogy really breaks down from there. She has options such as to leave the relationship, ignore, tolerate, support or participate. Herpes doesn't allow such options.

[VanessaVW]

That's not interesting.

That is down right rude, and thoughtless.

Not to mention, that she didn't even make a point or arguement.