Feminine side reflecting other emotions?

[Johnnifer]

Does your feminine side reflect other emotions? I always had a strong dislike of male society and the limits it forces on us (I also dislike aspects of female society but that is another rant). But I can dislike that and want to embrace my softer side whether I am feeling femme at the moment or not.

But I noticed when I truely feel softer and feminine seems tied to feeling sad or depressed. That seems to make me feel soft, weak, and vulnerable thus more feminine, (which sucks as I often find reasons to feel worse in those moods due to feeling alone or no freedom to dress which makes me feel more needing of it).

Do any of you find your feminine side tied more strongly to certain emotions?

[12Andy777]

When I'm sad, I almost always turn to dressing. Well when I'm happy I like to dress too . It's the inbetween feelings that usually have no tie to me dressing. If I feel alone or vulnerable, dressing can be really comforting.

[Shelly67]

Good thread .
In certain moments whilst both non femme and dressed , I question everything around me ..... In both guy and in my femanine persona there are times I look around me , the world and its character with sadness . It crosses both parts of my nature , makes me angst sometimes angry , just how hypocritical and blinkered the human race has become . Civilised ? Really .
For me , my pennies worth - to sum things up on this most thought provoking thread , perhaps its worth a fleeting moment of contemplation of just how fast we have evolved over the last 20 years .
And still have learnt bugger all .
Whoever came up with the term Rat Race was spot on .
That race is speeding up isn't it - everyone indulging greedily in these tight times ?
Maybe , just maybe coming to terms with the femanine part of my character , its allowed me to open my mind , look at things differently . Clearly .
Perhaps thats just a reality of age .
Either way , the questions and quandry remain . I suppose all one can do is try to roll with the punches ...... try to live a life where conciousness in my mind should be encouraged .

One things for sure ... history will repeat itself .

And so will I probably .

Modern life is rubbish .

To me personally , this sums it all up - http://youtu.be/6b2ZXKX9NSY

[ReineD]

Johnifer, I'm a GG and there are aspects of people that I also don't particularly like. I'll give you some examples. I don't like people who put others down, or gossip, in order to build themselves up. I dont like people who are unthinking or selfish. I don't like narcissistic types. I don't like angry, rageful people, or cold and calculating, or frivolous and vacuous people.

In other words, there are some aspects of the human condition that I do not enjoy so much, whether any of these characteristics are expressed by men or by women. I also don't think any characteristic is gendered. Men can be vacuous just as women can be vengeful.

You say you feel softer and more feminine when you feel sad or depressed. This could be because you've not allowed yourself to be vulnerable while growing up. Maybe you thought you were supposed to be assertive and competitive so you suppressed your more tender feelings especially if you didn't want the other guys to know you enjoyed some girly things (assuming you did, when you were little). And now, you think that being quiet or getting in touch with some of your softer feelings is a feminine thing to do.

I just want to say there are men who allow themselves to feel vulnerable, sad, sensitive, caring, etc. These feelings really are a part of the full range of human emotion. They aren't particular to women.

You should rent a really sad movie in guy mode, and have a good cry watching it if it makes you want to cry. And then you should watch a football game or a really good war movie or something while you are dressed. And then you'll be able to feel a full range of emotion in both your modes.

[Melody1985]

I think if you actively embrace your feminine side like most of us mtf TGs do, then you can't help but have that affect your emotional side to some degree.. Men who have only acted real macho/masculine, will disguise any soft feeling for any number of reasons. While we embrace the soft side on purpose, and it will leak into our male mode life at some point.. Unless you're just a mean spirited person of course. Then you suck no matter what gender your portraying.

[Kate Simmons]

It's really all about getting in touch with deep feelings and being able to express them.

[KellyJameson]

Fear fuels much of human behavior and most fears are not from imminent danger such as someone pointing a gun at you but the fear that lives in the future whose roots are in the past. We have expectations of bad things happening to us because bads things did happen to us. Learning about yourself has much to do with understanding your fears, what they are and where they come from.

This is difficult because fear is an unpleasant emotion so we avoid remembering those experiences that have scarred us from the past from the fear of re-experiencing the emotion and become trapped by the fear of fear (fear of feeling) but fear has healing powers as well as destructive powers, the difficulty is learning this and gaining trust in our own minds to protect us not to hurt us so we than allow ourselves to feel again.

If you were hated for being a boy as a child you may have internalized this hate in the form of misandry against yourself just has a woman can hate herself in the form of misogyny. The hate between the sexes is very real and much of childhood is being harmed by being born into this world of hate between the sexes.

There are many reasons for crossdressing and escaping self hate is one of them in my opinion.

[KARI AN]

There are times that the soft side really is there and my feelings come out, some days I think its the spiro but anyway I preferre the soft side of me

[Barbara Ella]

I am so new to my feelings that they are in a constant of confusion right now. I am making a concerted effort to bring my femme more to the surface as i often do things as a man that I know are not right. I have found a rudder for my ship, and it is female that will soften the male, but I have no idea which is winning right now. Good thread, looking forward to replies from the more stable girls here.

Babes

[Karren H]

Why do we assume that feeling feminine is feeling soft or sad or even weak? Sterotypical feminine feelings based on.......what.... Some of the most feminine women I know are shrewd heartless business women I wouldn't turn my back on... Yet they are as feminine as it gets! Obviously I don't understand. And I think since we are not women. We don't know what it really means to be feminine or feel feminine... Even if we know how to look that way.. Imho.

[Marleena]

Good point Scarlet!

As genetic males we are taught to be strong from childhood. You know, "boys don't cry" is a good example. Or "take it like a man" <-- Maybe not such a good example.lol. But you you get the idea.

[kimdl93]

no, not really. I think we are always in danger of relating our own personal preferences, prejudices and phobias to our desire/need/choice (pick one or more) to dress. Its possible, maybe even likely, that CDing is entirely coincedental to how you feel about male and female roles in society.

In other words, I agree with Karren and Scarlet!

[*Vanessa*]

I guess I just don't get the question. I reflect my emotions because I am me not what I do and not the other way around. Embracing your softer side is really not gender related either, as both can go it to be more nurturing for example. I also don't get ReineD's argument (at least the first part of it).

Maybe this has more to do with CDers reflecting the female species, but I am not sure. I do know, I am just me and this one cries all the time.

<Boundary> Maybe my Arctic Blond roots are just showing </Boundary>