regrets and missed opportunities

[darci.c]

Well I went to college at Texas Tech university, a school of about 30,000 students. Demographically, it lies in a pretty conservative area, full of churches, farmers, and not very many open minds.

In all my years at that school, I never met a single person that I knew was gay, bi, or TG. (what are the odds? I knew they had to be out there) but I guess it's because I hung around in straight circles.

One day, however, I was trolling around in the library when a guy (clearly male) walked by wearing a long dress, clearly trying to let his pretty side out.

I was stunned. I thought "here? in public?" and wanted to talk to him soooo bad. But didn't. I guess I just wanted to know how he overcame the social obstacles and grew enough courage to just do it. I wanted to talk about clothes too...

Saw him another time on campus but couldn't make time to say hello because I was late for class.

Wish I had gotten to know him. Ah, well...

[StaceyJane]

I know what you mean by a conservative campus. I went to Baylor which is very , very conservative.

[Allisa]

Late for class, really?Never saw him again on campus,dress or not?I thought going to an institute of higher learning was to expand ones horizons and open ones mind to new concepts,ideas and the like ,seems that your possible new friend knew that.You do know that "around in straight circles"is an oxymoron,but what do I know I'm just a high school graduate.Sorry that got harsh, but your post just hit a nerve about intolerance.One last query do you CD?

[Kaz]

Life is full of missed opportunities and potential regrets. But regrets should be spurs to spot the opportunities and go for it in the future! Then they stop being regrets! You could have found out who he was and tracked him down if you had really wanted to!

My life is a mix of missed opportunities regrets. It has also been increasingly full of grasped opportunities and fewer regrets as I have got older!

So he appeared to have the confidence to just do it... in a relatively easy going environment (compared to the harsh reality of work and careers as a male)... and the learning point is?

[Karren H]

He probably lost a bet! Lol. I regret I never learned to polka! Long story...

[Beverley Sims]

I did it for $20.00 once, little did they know I would have done it for less.

[Johnnifer]

I've had moments like that, especially before I outed myself when I was much more nervous. I live in rural southwestern New Hampshire which is in many ways very redneck and not that open minded.

Once I was eating in Applebees next to a table with four girls. All very pretty and passing. I kept hearing a male voice. I was feeling nervous (not sure why) and after I ate after pacing and debating enough I decided to say hi and get over my nervousness by talking to her and maybe finding someone who'd understand. The other girls spoke but she was silent. I likely came off as a creep.

I had one other scenario like this. I was shopping in wal-mart and saw an amazingly attractive but unpassing 20 something year old girl named Tiffany. I asked her her name and found her the most attractive girl ever but was too scared to ask her out so I went by a couple other times to say hi but knew I came across as a weirdo.

Now that I am out as non hetero and have crossdressed in public at clubs I am much less nervous. But still I have had scenarios when I seen a TG girl and have wanted to speak with them and have been too nervous to.

[DonnaT]

In a number of colleges, you'll find guys running around in skirts/dresses because they are pledging a fraternity.

[kimdl93]

I'm pretty sure that people like us are on every college campus and mixed in with every straight crowd. The same thing is true of the miliatry, and it seems every walk of life. But unlike the person you describe, I didn't have the nerve to go out openly at that stage in life. Its a shame, really, because my skin was never nicer and my features so young. So, in a nut shell, I don't so much miss the opportunity to meet other CDrs, but certainly wish I knew then what I know now!!!

[darci.c]

Yeah, I don't think he was pledging... I saw him like that twice, weeks apart. I also heard people talking about him once, they called him the "dress guy." Nobody I knew knew his name.