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Thread: Just a few wild thoughts about..

  1. #1
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    Just a few wild thoughts about..

    the endless mystery of WHY.

    For those of you who started at a very early age...

    Do you remember way back when you first started dressing, if you possibly had a better Relationship whith your mothers for whatever reason than your fathers? Maybe your dad was seldom around, hung out at the bars or with the guys on weekends or traveled the roads for business or yelled a lot or was "mean" to you and/or your mom, brothers and sisters...

    Is at possible that a bad relationship with your dad at an early age was at least a CONTRIBUTING factor? Maybe some here grew up without a dad at all?

  2. #2
    Silver Member Angela Campbell's Avatar
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    Not for me. I had a wonderful situation as a child. Two loving parents, a good home, sunday school, everything you would hope for. I just knew I wanted to be a girl. I started dressing before kindergarden, at around 4 or 5. I had an older brother and plenty of good male role models. I do not think it is a result of learned experiences, or situations I was in. I was simply born with this. For me it was not a product of environment.
    All I ever wanted was to be a girl. Is that really asking too much?

  3. #3
    Platinum Member kimdl93's Avatar
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    None of these speculations about parents are even remotely close in my case. Dad was always present and mostly a positive force in the household. I remember, at my first awareness, the sense that I was different in some way,from my siblings, and remember trying on my sisters slip at around the age of four.

    This is the old nature vs nurture question. The hard evidence is coming down on nature as the causative factor.

  4. #4
    Platinum Member Beverley Sims's Avatar
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    Playing dressup at four years old probably helped nature along.
    I just liked playing with the girls, and I still do.
    Work on your elegance,
    and beauty will follow.

  5. #5
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    I had and still have a wonderful relationship with my parents who are together.

    When young, I was shy and used to stay at home a lot and would often be with mom and her female friends when they visited or we went to their houses. When conversations were about make-up, hair, womens' clothes etc. I'd be encouraged to join in.

    Mom and a neoghbour also gave me their women's glossy magazines.

    I guess that sparked my interest.

  6. #6
    Member cdtraveler's Avatar
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    I grew up in a alcoholic home. Dad was the drinker. Mom also so busy trying Make all seem fine and I believe this led to a greater need for nurture and comfort in me that neither parent could provide As a result soft things became something I strongly desired and found it in women's clothing lipstick etc.

  7. #7
    Member cdtraveler's Avatar
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    I grew up in a alcoholic home. Dad was the drinker. Mom also so busy trying Make all seem fine and I believe this led to a greater need for nurture and comfort in me that neither parent could provide As a result soft things became something I strongly desired and found it in women's clothing lipstick etc.

  8. #8
    Silver Member justmetoo's Avatar
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    Well, my dad wasn't the greatest dad, but none of my brothers crossdress (as far as I know). Given plenty of other indicators I really believe a large part of my personality (and everyone else's) is innate, either part of our dna and partly due to our environment in the womb. I'm sure there are also things in our life that affect us as well, So, nature and nurture, not one or the other, make us who we are.

  9. #9
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    I think it is both honestly. We have a possible different amount of hormones at birth so we are a little bit more feminine. We realize at a young age men aren't allowed to wear womens clothes so we develop a fetish. Then as we get older we realize we like womens cloths even without the fetish. The parents help determine at what age we discover this. That is my 2 cents.

  10. #10
    Swans have more fun! sandra-leigh's Avatar
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    Not here. My father was a good father; about my only disappointment in him was that he couldn't play "horsey" as long as I wanted.

    He died shortly before I turned 14, but I'm pretty sure the propensity was set in me before that.

  11. #11
    Silver Member BRANDYJ's Avatar
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    My father dies when I was 10 years old. My first cross dressing experience did not take place until after his death. It was the same year as I recall. I'm not sure if his death had much to do with it.

  12. #12
    TrueNorth Strong & Fierce Princess Chantal's Avatar
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    Not for me, as well. I had great relationships with both parents and most of the time we did things as a family. I contribute the crossdressing beginnings solely onto my curiousities of pantyhose.

  13. #13
    Member CD Kelley's Avatar
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    I had a great childhood and wonderful parents. I believe it was my 3 sisters that inspired me, 2 older 1 younger.

  14. #14
    Adventuress Kate Simmons's Avatar
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    It's true that my Dad wasn't home much because he worked a lot but that had nothing to do with my CDing. It was always more about who I was as a person and the clothing, et. al. was just a vehicle to facilitate things.
    Second star to the right and straight on till morning

  15. #15
    Tennessee girl TeriAnn's Avatar
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    My Mom let me wear her high heels at the age of 4 or 5 didn't dress in her clothes as they were to big. When I took a bath or shower she had washed her stockings and panties. I got the notion to try them on, Between wearing her heels and putting on her stockings is what made me know that I wanted to be a girl. I didn't know what it meant but I knew I felt different when I was dressed in my Moms under things. My dad came home early from work one day and got real angry at what I was wearing so it stopped for a long time. Now I dress when I please and feel great about myself.
    Last edited by TeriAnn; 11-25-2012 at 01:44 PM.
    [SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Nothing beats a great pair of heels...

  16. #16
    Silver Member Maria 60's Avatar
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    Not for me when I was young I would try to walk in the same steps my dad would take. When I was in my late teens we didn't talk for a few years. The last ten years of his life we were not father and son we were more like friends. He was a great dad and I miss him a lot.

  17. #17
    Girl from the Eagles Nest reb.femme's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wildaboutheels View Post
    Do you remember way back when you first started dressing, if you possibly had a better Relationship whith your mothers for whatever reason than your fathers? Maybe your dad was seldom around, hung out at the bars or with the guys on weekends or traveled the roads for business or yelled a lot or was "mean" to you and/or your mom, brothers and sisters.....

    Is at possible that a bad relationship with your dad at an early age was at least a CONTRIBUTING factor?
    Started about age 10/11 and relationship with my mum was good then, but would have rapidly changed for the worse had she known I liked her silky items. My dad was an emotion free zone and on reflection, it would seem we kids were more of a problem in his life than a joy. He was aggressive and mean spirited but a hard working provider, .......so I'm thankful for that much, but that was his positive side in a nutshell.

    I personally don't see this as a spark for my CDing though, simply access to and a love of soft materials that coincided with my hitting puberty. Could the miserable git be a contributing factor?...... I've always declared as I grew more self aware that I would be the complete emotional opposite of him, so if anyone wants to surmise that as the trigger, be my guest.

    Personally, I am me and I'm happy, so I really don't tend to analyse the hows or whys unless in answer to a question like this. Not avoiding the question because it's painful, more, I simply can't be bothered.

    Rebecca
    Flying high under the spell of life!

    http://www.rebsweb.co.uk

  18. #18
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    I had both parents there and involved. No neglect or abuse by either. I just felt an attraction to stockings and panties, anything silky. I would try on stockings under the bed covers and got seen by the parents when I was in awe of a stocking display of manequin legs at a big department store in Louisville. I have always had an attraction to silky things, for as long as I can remember.

  19. #19
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    Nope, I think I've always been closer to my Dad. My Mom is cool too though, so no "Mommy issues" either.

  20. #20
    Donna June Donna June's Avatar
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    My father wasn't around much and died when I was fairly young. I still don't see how that would make me want to dress as a girl

  21. #21
    My Ship has sailed? Barbara Ella's Avatar
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    Oldest of 5 sons, youngest was a daughter. Wonderful father and mother. I think my father's closer attention to the oldest son, and his Germanic sternness worked with my innate shyness to keep me away from the dressing. As I look back, I see so many signs of what I really liked in life, through the yers, but never acted on them after my one trial with a bra and towel for hair to make shapely shadows in the bathroom. I was an admirer of the female form, draped or not, still am, but now i know why.

    Barbara
    He (she) who would learn to fly one day must first learn to stand and walk and run and climb and dance.
    - Friedrich Nietzche -
    I may never get to fly like the other girls, but I do so want to dance, so I continue to climb.

  22. #22
    Silver Member stephNE's Avatar
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    Nope, I started at about 5, wearing my moms panties and bras. Neither of my parents liked/nor wanted children. They were married for about 7 years before I came along - accidents do happen. Neither of them ever had time for me.
    Stephanie

  23. #23
    Member Aloha Jayne's Avatar
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    My dad was always at work and when he was home didn't want to be bothered with the kids. My mom was always busy and emotionally distant. So I have a strong case for the nurture argument. However, after 50 years of analyzing my feelings I am still certain that wanting to be female was determined at birth, certainly by the age of 5 when I began admiring the pretty dresses the girls got to wear. It is different for everyone, but for me my parents were not the cause.
    I just couldn't wear my big girl panties today.

  24. #24
    Member Marguarite's Avatar
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    I had a great relationship with both parents. Does the "why" always have to be a negative.

    Growing up I had a lot girl friends, I enjoyed them so much, at some point I just wanted to be "one of the girls".
    It's more a matter of running to something , rather than running from something. At least that's how I look at it.

  25. #25
    Gold Member Cynthia Anne's Avatar
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    I can remember at the age of four my older sister dressed me to play house a few times! Dad worked all the time so I didn't really know him until I was a teenager!
    If you don't like the way I'm livin', you just leave this long haired country girl alone:

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